NeoGAF Anonymous Confessions 2015 - Bare Your Burdens

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I tell you, I emptied my entire ballsack into my sister.
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GIF-angry-Mad-Men-shocked-stunned-taken-aback-GIF.gif
 
Catch me if you can
Working on my tan
Salvatore
Dying by the hand
Of a foreign man
Happily
Calling out my name
In the summer rain
Ciao amore
Salvatore can wait
Now it's time to eat
Soft ice cream
 
Look at all these fuckers in the confessions.
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I imagine this Confessor to look like Ryan Gosling. I haven't edited this Confession, but I apologize for the language used by the Confessor as it is probably offensive to trans folk

Anyways...

Dear Penthouse,



Tldr: went to Thailand, had sex with a transgendered prostitute, loved it.
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Well, at least you enjoyed yourself, confessor. Just keep in mind we aren't a kink. There's absolutely nothing wrong with having sex with pre-op/non-op transwomen but it isn't just about our private parts. Some of us hate them, some of us don't mind, etc. I fall into the latter, but as long as you can treat us with respect like any other woman, you'll be fine. I'll stop there!
Amalthea said:
Hey Trangender fucker and propably some other people:

Maybe you could at least for a second try to imagine how life is like for straight trans-women when most guys interested in you see you as nothing more than a weird kink, even going as far as feeling the need to continually express that they are normal and lead normal relationships.
I don't want to start one of those "Would yould bang a transwoman?"-discussion, we all know how these end, but if you are already aroused by transwomen, please at least give us some dignity!
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Exactly!
 
I met a girl toward the end of 11th grade who I found attractive. I told her how I felt and asked her out. She said she wasn't ready to date. I offered to wait, and became friends with her over the summer. During that time we got close, eventually made out one night, and started dating. Pretty typical stuff, I think. We were together for four and a half years. Nearly my entire time in college. She was two years younger than me. I had initially planned to move on with my life when I finished high school, but we agreed to stay together and share whatever free time we possibly could. I failed out of college in my first year due to extreme anxiety and my inability to admit or address it.

I opted to apply to a private school across the country to chase a dream I couldn't have chased at a typical university. This meant living at a great distance from my girlfriend. This broke her heart, but she still wanted to stay with me. She had some odd quirks after I left: she no longer wanted to talk about anything sexual, and her communication with me in general slowed significantly. She had always been weird about sex since she was never educated about it. She couldn't name the parts of her sex organs, claimed to have never masturbated, and never once orgasmed from anything I did with her. Trust me, I poured my life energy into getting her to enjoy herself in bed but she was so self-conscious about being seen enjoying sex that nothing worked on her. At least, that's what I thought. She finally went to college during my second year of living at a distance. Even though I was far away, I put a great deal of effort doing whatever I could for her. Helping her make class choices, tutoring her on difficult subjects, revising her papers... whatever she needed. On Halloween of that year, she didn't reply to my texts for the longest period of time ever. I knew she had been hanging out with some douchey looking guys, and I knew for sure something was up. I was incredibly stressed from then until the end of our relationship. I knew she was lying to me about something, maybe more than one thing, but whenever I tried to explain to her how I felt she accused me of interfering with her life too much because I was so insecure. Still, she wanted to continue being my girlfriend. My life became absolute torture as I wanted to continue loving her and needed to continue feeling loved even though I was certain she had cheated on me.

It finally fell apart in January of this year. She told me she liked another guy. When she left me, she revealed all of her idiotic secrets. Of course she masturbated. She wanted to hide her sexual pleasure from me because she never found me attractive. She told me she only wanted to be my girlfriend because she liked my personality and didn't want me to lose interest if she wouldn't go out with me. So she ran a fucking sham of a relationship to use me for my infinite generosity for four and a half years of my life. She told me that night on Halloween wasn't even the first time she cheated, and that she'd just go after whatever guy seemed hot to her when I wasn't around. She wasn't interested in pleasing me or bringing me comfort of happiness. I was just a convenience whenever she was lonely or needed something. My life from age 17-21/22ish was a lie. Wasted years under insane amounts of stress from her and school combined. It destroyed me. I wanted to kill myself. She convinced me she intended to marry me and then walked away when my trust in her ran out. I felt like everything had been taken from me.

Now I have a really hard time trusting people. I went to a therapist, transferred to a school back home to be around my family, started lifting and running. I look much healthier and stronger now. I feel better, physically. But in the year since that went down, I still haven't found a woman I could trust, or one who was interested in me in the slightest. I still see a lifeless shell in the mirror. I still have nightmares about who I thought she was. I'm still trapped in the lie I'd been living for my entire adult life. Yeah, I get it. A lying, cheating, evil bitch. Not that bad. But nearly a quarter of my life so far was invested in her and I'm completely incapable of escaping it. I don't know what to do to move on. I've gone on dates, tried to get with other girls, but nothing works and it just keeps going back to how much I'm haunted by her. At one point she had the audacity to come to me to complain about how much of an asshole her new boyfriend was. Are you fucking kidding me?
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Jesus Christ.
 
Wow! Just Wow! Confessor, it gets better. It will hurt a lot, it will be hard as fuck at times, but it WILL GET BETTER!

Not everyone out there is a fucking maniac like your ex. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
 
Damn, that's just evil.

Not much you can do about it anymore. Remove her from your live completely. Block on social media, block her number and never talk to her again. In time you'll meet somebody who deserves you.

I don't know how old you are now, but if this was recently, don't worry too much about not meeting anybody yet. Lots of guys are still single in their mid- to late 20s, nothing wrong with that. Also nothing wrong with taking a break from dating if you don't feel like it, as long as you don't close yourself off to the possibility.
 
I saw NTGYK's reaction and figured that would be another disgusting confession, but that was just really sad. I feel for you, confessor. Hang in there. You'll get past this someday. :-(
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Jesus Christ.
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You lucked out.

This person is absolutely insane and you're lucky she didn't lie to you even longer. Be happy that such an evil person is out of your life now.

Also, the majority of women, heck people in general are not like this.

They are simply not, don't overthink it and when your mind starts telling you otherwise simply go lalalalalalala and don't pay attention to those thoughts and instantly think of something different.

It's great you found new confidence in yourself through exercise. Keep it up. :)
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Jesus Christ.
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I'm surprised that, of all of the crazy things I've read, this is the confession which gets me to post. In any case, Confessor, I'm sorry you had to deal with such a horrible person. I know what it is like to be used emotionally like this, although not nearly on the same scale as you. It takes time for you to begin trusting people and opening yourself up again, but don't force yourself either. Just focus on you, as you are doing, and separate yourself from your ex-girlfriend entirely. The healing will only begin once you do.
 
It's best the confessor move on and forget she exists. But if she continues to dip into the confessor's orbit I would not think less of them for cutting contact in a way that is most satisfying to them. The best revenge is living well. And that phrase can have multiple implications...
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Jesus Christ.
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tGt9.gif

That is one of the meanest things I've ever heard about. I can't express all the hate I'm feeling towards her. What a filthy whore. I'm very sorry for you man, I can't even imagine what would I do if my girlfriend told me this, after being 6 years together (22 years, first girlfriend), but I would surely feel devastated. All gaffers support you, it will get better.
 
While the sister fucker story is definitely interesting, I can't help but feel it's just some one with an overactive imagination building on a situation that he saw in the Adam Sandler film That's My Boy.
 
Fraull said:
It wasn't just cheating, it was like to the next fucking level man.
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Yep, but the cheating part was what I could relate to and it sucks. The rest of what she did was insulting and inhumane imo. I know people are well, people but she, like you said, took it to the hnl (hole nother level - old MadTV quote lol).

Edit: @Mudo, well if it makes you feel any better, I do that from time to time. I think they're called intrusive thoughts or something like that? It's weird, frightening, and sometimes relaxing for me because in some ways for me, it makes me feel more human.

I would think about what would happen if I just disappeared and what would my family and friends do. Truth be told, they would be angry and sad. Angry because they wouldn't have known anything about it and sad because they lost me and they could no longer have me interacting with them. When I think about thay, it brightens my day. It actually makes me happy to know that my family and friends would actually be sad that I would die, disappear, or kill myself. To know that they actually care about me.

To know that they actually care about me. To know that people all over the world (as shown on NeoGAF) care about you.

That is what helps me from going through with these thoughts. To know that you, no, WE, matter.
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Jesus Christ.
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Similar thing happened to me. My high school sweetheart left for the military and all the guys wanted to get with her, so I broke things off. Found out they were taking bets on when I'd break up with her.

Next relationship was a girl I knew who I was always interested in but since I was seeing the high school girl, I didn't cheat. But once that was out of the way, I went for it. Found out later I was just a rebound until her high school crush was back in town.

Girl #2 is marrying her high school crush, so that's cool I guess.

Eventually, I found a girl who liked me for me, flaws and all. It's worth it. It'll happen if you're looking for it, confessor.

It sucks to pick yourself up and dust yourself off, but it'll be worth it.
 
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