NeoGAF Anonymous Confessions 2015 - Bare Your Burdens

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NotTheGuyYouKill said:
This one's for you, Shin!

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I'm honored NTGYK.

Also confessor, I think you and this guy might get along.
 
Because people have been asking and complaining about it, I'm gonna talk about the "celebrity confessors" a bit.

I see the Anonymous Confessions thread as having a few purposes. One is to get all these crazy stories that people can read. Good, bad, crazy, sane, disgusting, vanilla, sad, heartwarming, etc. The other reason is that it functions as something for people to relieve themselves of their burdens. The third one is to create a dialogue with these people. Sometimes you need more information. Sometimes you want to offer advice. Sometimes you just have to question the madness. That's why we do tend to get quite a bit of follow ups and they become "Francises" in Cesspool's terminology. Last year we got some follow ups from people, and I don't like denying the chance for someone to explain or follow up their confession, whether people think they get too much attention or they're fake.

My assumption is that every confession I post is true. I assume the follow ups are true as well. If you think they are fake or if you don't like the follow ups/franchise posts, just ignore them. They aren't going away, simply because when people do have serious problems and they do want to follow up and explain further, I like people to have that chance, no matter how insane or weird their issues or situations are.

Of course, that does get into really, really weird territory. Like, Impregnator's back with...

Well, a hell of an update.

I understand why people don't like them. I can understand that people's attention is hijacked by some of the more high-profile and crazy stories. Like I've said a few times, I hope everyone reads all of the confessions (save Trigger Warning ones, simply cause I can understand why some people want to avoid those). Cesspool has done a phenomenal job of collecting and organizing them in the first post/Table of Contents.

So story follow ups are here to stay. In the future, I will throw a sentence at the top with a numerical indicator, so if you really don't want to read through them, feel free to skip them. It's perfectly alright. The number of single confessions vastly outnumber the 'franchise' confessions.

And those asking about Soulfucker: Look, I just like the guy. I like his brand of astronomically weird sci-fi stuff. For me, it provides some weird almost levity and odd counterbalance to the whole shindig. I keep posting them because I find them fun and I know a few other people here quite enjoy the weirdness.

And yo, Soulfucker is legit.
 
I don't think too many people would go out of their way to make fake ones when they won't ever get the actual "fame" associated with them.
 
Thanks for sharing your stance on franchise confessors, NTGYK. I like them personally, but it's understandable that others might find them inappropriate. It's pretty interesting to see how various confessors respond to the attention and come back for more, how their tone changes, etc. If they're clearly marked and don't take up slots that could go to new confessions (bar the horrible unpostable ones), no harm done.

I like Soulfucker too :3 I'd love it if they could de-anonymise or get a Gaf account and start a separate thread dedicated to their RP stories.
 
Wanna respond to some older posts.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
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You goddamn scumbag.
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You know you fucked up when you get the scumbag dad gif from NTGYK confessor.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
You haven't truly lived until you've masturbated in the women's bathroom.
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I guess I've never truly lived then
and likely never will.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Yeah, that's uh... That's not an expected one, but you know, that's not too odd.
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Now see, I can get behind liking tall women. I'll admit I have a preference for taller women. This seems to being going a bit overboard to say the least.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I don't. Get. People.

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Let's see here we got Soulfucker, Sisterfucker. What other fuckers do we have?

Endruen said:
Every Oriemo licking tongue gif beginning here.
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My little gifs can't possibly be this hilarious.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
HOLY SHIT THE IMPREGNATION FETISH GUY IS BACK AND THINGS WENT FUCKING MENTAL CAUSE HIS GIRLFRIEND FOUND OUT

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I worry for their child.

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Well, I think all of my curiosity vis-a-vis fleshlights is now gone.

Um... I'm... glad you're okay.
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Well that's...something to say the least.
 
ShinRPGamer said:
Wanna respond to some older posts.



You know you fucked up when you get the scumbag dad gif from NTGYK confessor.



I guess I've never truly lived then
and likely never will.



Now see, I can get behind liking tall women. I'll admit I have a preference for taller women. This seems to being going a bit overboard to say the least.



Let's see here we got Soulfucker, Sisterfucker. What other fuckers do we have?



My little gifs can't possibly be this hilarious.



I worry for their child.



Well that's...something to say the least.
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Now introducing, Horsefucker.

Welcome to hell, enjoy your stay!
 
I don't think I love my wife anymore, and I want out of this marriage. Unfortunately, we have a son with special needs, and I can't bear to leave him or be just a part-time parent for him. So, I feel like I'm stuck in this loveless relationship for the next decade and a half. And I don't know how to get out.
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Wow, that's awful. Look... You gotta do what's right by you and your son. Being in a loveless marriage isn't gonna help him or you
 
I wonder if sister fucker will ever realize that he's in love with his sister. It seems painfully obvious they both have feelings for each other.
 
StaticJam said:
I wonder if sister fucker will ever realize that he's in love with his sister. It seems painfully obvious they both have feelings for each other.
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Alas we will never know.

On a side note, I wonder if sister fucker is into Fire Emblem. TV Tropes knows how many examples of brother-sister incest you can find in that franchise.
 
I imagine this Confessor to look like Ryan Gosling. I haven't edited this Confession, but I apologize for the language used by the Confessor as it is probably offensive to trans folk

Anyways...

Dear Penthouse,

Ever since I was young, maybe in my late teens early 20's, I had an obsession about transsexual's and shemale's. I'm not gay and have had several girlfriends and even a young daughter. I think it all started when I was browsing porn pics I downloaded for masturbating. I came across a very attractive picture to jerk off to and notice the female had a penis.... this was all new to me and didn't even know about transsexual's. She was so attractive I proceeded to continue my business. After, I started searching the net more and more about transsexuals and become obsessed. I used to think about fucking a transsexual whilst having intercourse with my then girlfriend.

Throughout my 20's I had thought about paying for a Shemale, but ultimately didn't as the ones I've seen in my home country were mainly tall and masculine, not like the small and petite feminine ones I've seen online and heard about abroad. So it was all still a fantasy to me.

Fast forward to the near present, I was invited to go on holiday to Thailand for a wedding. I jumped at the opportunity as I haven't been abroad for some time. I booked my flights, hotel and several day tours. Then it dawned on mw that Bangkok is notorious for Ladyboys, very manly ones and also very feminine ones that I have fantasised about and seen online over the years. This maybe my opportunity to finally fulfil my fantasy!

Having arrived on my first day, I had done little research. So I was in my Hotel looking online where to go a scope out. So I looked at an area called Patpong as it was close by. I decided to take a walk there on my first evening to check it out. There was an array of GoGo bars (strip clubs?) and Ladyboy bars as well as stumbling through a streets seemingly exclusive to gay guys. It was all a bit daunting and intimidating as I was approached left right and centre offering me massages, sex shows and ping pong shows. Feeling scared and nervous I decide to bail. It was a bit of an anti-climax as I didn't really see much. A few days later (after id done a lot of site seeing and meeting friends), I decide to go to another area called Nana, this place was recommended online as it is less intimidating and didn't have guys outside trying to pull you in. Feeling nervous I went into a random bar near Nana Plaza, there I had a whisky and coke. There was no Ladyboys in site as Nana Plaza opens from 6pm and I had to be somewhere at that time. I was approached by GoGo girl, who offered her company, I knew what this was leading too even tho I wasn't after a normal girl. Still feeling nervous I agreed to go with the bar girl and pay her for her services, it had been a while since I got my dick wet so I thought what the hell and did my business. This put me at ease as now I know how it works. So after a few more days of doing tourist things and the weeding, it came to my last night in Thailand. Having thought about it throughout my trip, it was now or never... I decide to make my way to Nana Plaza at around 10pm, I go in and look around and get grabbed by several girls and ladyboys enticing me to go into one of the many bars. There is so much to choose from and the heat is unbearable. So I sit outside in the seating area, nervous as fuck and sweating shit loads. I whip out my phone and do some research, and decide on which bar to go into. Then I thought fuck it, I stood up and walked straight into one of the recommend bars. I'm sat down by someone and ordered a beer. The place was small and there were about 4 or 5 ladyboys pole dancing on stage. Within minutes I had about 10 ladyboys in front of me and asked to choose one to keep me company. My eyes wonder... there were ladyboys of all types, tall, big boobs, manly and feminine. I spot a very feminine one within seconds and chose her, she was very cute and looked like one of those Asian doll type girls you always see, big boobs and shorter then me. She looked more attractive then some of the girls I've been with! She sits down and we started talking and I order her a drink. I know where this was leading and was waiting for her to offer her services, which she duly did. I explain that I have never had a ladyboy but always fantasised about them, I also tell her that I'm not gay, but she was very reassuring and said she would look after me.

So I pay the bar fine and make our way up to a room to rent, the room seemed well maintained and clean. We both shower as required. We both strip of and start kissing and she gives me head... it was the best head I had received from anyone! All this time she had her bits tucked between her legs. This goes on for sometime until I request to see her penis. She shows me a cleanly shaven penis and I make no hesitation in grabbing it and giving her a tug. This was the first time I touched another penis other then my own, but it felts so right and natural. This goes on for a little while, whilst in my head I was thinking what next, I'm already here, might as well go the full distance...so I ask to suck her dick. She has no hesitation in letting me so I go straight in. I loved it, it felt so good and I was ecstatic. We continued in several positions 69 etc.... she then ask me to give her anal, I didn't need her to ask twice. Again this went on for sometime. I'm enjoying myself so much that I think to myself that I'm gonna go all the way and ask her to fuck me, I tell her to go easy as nothing has ever entered that region only left lol! So she lubes up and slowly inserts, she said to tell her straight away if it hurts, which it fucking did, I'm not sure how far she got up but it was fucking painful! She immediately stops and apologises. It wasn't to be, there is no way I'm gonna try that again lol. So we continued and she wants us to wank together and cum together. So I blow my load first all over her belly, there was a lot... more then usual and she follows shortly. It was amazing experience. We both shower after and she give me a massage to end the night. She wants me to add her on Facebook to keep in touch, I decided against it as my friends will see but said I can message her on it without adding her.

It was one of the best sexual encounters I have ever had and fulfilled one of my sexual desires, On the flight back home, it was all I could think about and would not hesitate to do it all over again... even with the same girl!
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Tldr: went to Thailand, had sex with a transgendered prostitute, loved it.
 
Therapists. See them.

So this comes in following a flood of really interesting, funny emails so I wanted to start off saying my confession is mundane and maybe a bit irriational.

1) Kind of a background one but I was born with a genetic mutation in my DNA that had a literal one in a million chance of happening. Literally. It's most likely what leads to my anti-religion stance on GAF and other sites, though others have tried to steer me toward Jesus. And what leads to my general resentment of life. It's irrational but still. I was just that unlucky. Also it gets weird because the first name part of the syndrome is kinda awkward to say out loud because the doctor had a last name that sounds racist when you say it out loud. At least in the south, like in True Detective Season 1. Just an observation. Anyway, it's a brittle bone disease that gives me a physical deformity in my arms, legs, and chest with little to no muscle ability. I also have scoliosis in my spine so I am short in stature. If Dating-GAF thought it was hard... I also have a weak immune system and heart problems. Rolled a 1 for constitution in Life.

2) I think I have a C in an AP class that I really need to get a B or better in. I really wanted to attend a technical college in my state that recently started attracting the over-acheiving kind of students. This really harmed my chances of attending so I feel terrible. I have tried so hard to pass that class but I couldn't. Now I'm having anxiety attacks and stressing out so hard. I hate myself. It fucking sucks that I couldn't get that B. The reason why it's so important to me that I get into the college is because there is a higher chance for me to get a solid lead in life and chance to start over especially with my disability. That B would definitely improve my chances to get in. Now I have to apply to transfer in or something.

3) This fits in with 2) because I have Asian parents, mostly my mom. I seem to have the worst luck. To put it lightly, I can definitely see the POV of the cumfessor who had sex on the grave of his/her mother. I mean that is gross to me, but I understand the intentions. My mother is a hypocrite, hateful, and digustingly abusive. Verbally if not physically. And I'm stuck with her, all throughout college years. Until I can find a job I guess. This makes me so incredibly bitter because others have the ability to just fucking walk away. They aren't fucking dependent upon someone, especially someone as hateful as her. Not only this but both my parents are yelling at me about that C in the class. They are the most sterotypical Asian parents of all time, saying how ashamed they are of me and how the other parents will know that I'm a failure.

4) I hate my personality. To describe myself in an objective sense: I'm introverted, pessimistic, and I also have poor time management. I also find myself awake late through the night which contributes even more to my already poor health. I hate my quiet attitude and the fact that my on the spot thinking is slow. I hate that I seem to mess up on social situations. I hate that I have poor anger management. I hate being fucking depressed at times, don't worry I'm not sucidal or anything. I also hate that I will probably never go to a therapist about this stuff. Just at a low point in life it seems.
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Nothing irrational, but definitely go see a therapist.
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I imagine this Confessor to look like Ryan Gosling. I haven't edited this Confession, but I apologize for the language used by the Confessor as it is probably offensive to trans folk

Anyways...

Dear Penthouse,



Tldr: went to Thailand, had sex with a transgendered prostitute, loved it.
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You took it up the ass?

Confessor, you need Jesus or something. God damn.

Should have blown your load inside that ass for bonus points
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I imagine this Confessor to look like Ryan Gosling. I haven't edited this Confession, but I apologize for the language used by the Confessor as it is probably offensive to trans folk

Anyways...

Dear Penthouse,



Tldr: went to Thailand, had sex with a transgendered prostitute, loved it.
Click to expand...
Bit of a crazy story but hey confessor had a good time so that's what counts..I think?
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I imagine this Confessor to look like Ryan Gosling. I haven't edited this Confession, but I apologize for the language used by the Confessor as it is probably offensive to trans folk

Anyways...

Dear Penthouse,



Tldr: went to Thailand, had sex with a transgendered prostitute, loved it.
Click to expand...
This is that one you were talking about earlier right?
 
Let me just say that I'm glad the animal fetish story wasn't something actually like animal abuse.

If it had been a story about a guy doing unspeakable things to an innocent animal that would have been it for me and I would have GTFO'd and hoped that person gets put in prison.
 
Admiral Woofington said:
Let me just say that I'm glad the animal fetish story wasn't something actually like animal abuse.

If it had been a story about a guy doing unspeakable things to an innocent animal that would have been it for me and I would have GTFO'd and hoped that person gets put in prison.
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I think I also read one like that before in one of ronito's confessional threads...

j/k lol
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Something else in the meantime:



On the one hand, the way you're working is unhealthy. But on the other hand... maybe you just love working. Some people are like that. They like having purpose, keeping busy, don't like leisure time.

Question is: Are you happy the way you are? Are you making anyone else suffer?
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I totally feel this way right now. I wouldn't get a 2nd job, but I almost prefer being at work than at home because I hate being under the roof of my parents and work is the only thing giving me satisfaction in life. It's the one thing I feel competent at, and when I play games at home, I feel like I'm not doing something productive. Work makes me feel productive and not completely useless. Probably not healthy.
 
StaticJam said:
I wonder if sister fucker will ever realize that he's in love with his sister. It seems painfully obvious they both have feelings for each other.
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Yeah its clear that they do love each other in a romantic way, but due to the stigma of what they are doing they have convinced themselves its just a physical thing when its clear to any outsider that there is something deeper than just having sex that keeps drawing them back to each other event when they are in a different relationship.
 
Dirtyshubb said:
Yeah its clear that they do love each other in a romantic way, but due to the stigma of what they are doing they have convinced themselves its just a physical thing when its clear to any outsider that there is something deeper than just having sex that keeps drawing them back to each other event when they are in a different relationship.
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I just love how he's so damn enthusiastic about fucking his blood.

It's sick, I know.

I'm going to bed now.

Happy Thanksgiving, AmeriGAF.
 
Dryk said:
Which one? The one their fiancee's carrying, the one their lover is carrying or the one their other love is already raising?
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If i remember correctly, the first girl he got pregnant had and abortion. So "only" two pregnant girls right now.

Mare appreciator, hmmm nope i don't see the sexyness and appeal. But more power to you.

NTGYK, thanks for putting out your view on this whole confession shindig. I appreciate and am also on #teamreal.

Guys that overwork, any tips on concentrating at a task in hand? I can't focus on anything to save my life. My mind is just constantly flying in different directions.
 
Only just starting to catch up on some of these (it's been a while since I last checked the thread).

NotTheGuyYouKill said:
"Turn it around", he tells me. I do so and when I do I realize there's a hole with stuffing coming out of it from the stuffed simba's butthole. I tell him it's disgusting and he tells me to flip it over laughing hysterically. Once again I do so and see stuffing come out of a hole where the Simba's private parts would be. He makes it seem like it's a big joke so I start to laugh with him.
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Simba-Nala-Confused-Look-Lion-King.gif


But this time it was different. When the E! entertainment special was going on and we were a bit into it, he stands up, runs to the closet, grabs the Simba and using him to cover himself he opens the room's restroom door and stared at me.
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He simply says "Hakuna matatata", enters and locks the bathroom door. For the next few minutes I heard grunts and what sounded like him talking dirty to Simba in the restroom.
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Others might say it honestly isn't that weird and that he didn't care about the Simba doll as much as a makeshift fleshlight. But to this date I can't watch the Lion King and not burst out laughing at the awkwardness of that moment. Heck I went to visit him not too long ago and we found the stuffed simba in the attic. I didn't touch it, he saw me and he assured me it has been washed.
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Hey Trangender fucker and propably some other people:

Maybe you could at least for a second try to imagine how life is like for straight trans-women when most guys interested in you see you as nothing more than a weird kink, even going as far as feeling the need to continually express that they are normal and lead normal relationships.
I don't want to start one of those "Would yould bang a transwoman?"-discussion, we all know how these end, but if you are already aroused by transwomen, please at least give us some dignity!
 
That horse-fancying confession...I was reading it out to my partner but had to stop at delicious muscular assholes and winking vaginas. I'm glad to be reminded of the Simba doll story now since it's so (literally) fluffy in comparison.
 
RionaaM said:
Er... as far as I know, masturbation doesn't involve fucking another person. Otherwise it would be called "having sex", not "masturbation".
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Masturbation involving another person is mutual masturbation, and the confessor mentioned it as one of his steps on the banjo-laden road to incest.


*reads last two days' confessions*


OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
 
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