No idea applying for a visa was this much fun!

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tmarques

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I'm filling up an application form for a friend and the thing is hysterical. Do prostitutes, drug lords and terrorists have some kind of honour code that prevents them from lying? Just seems like an incredible waste of time for everyone involved.

Are you a member or representative of a terrorist organization?

Have you ever ordered, incited, committed, assisted, or otherwise participated in genocide?

Are you coming to the United States to engage in prostitution or unlawful commercialized vice or have you been engaged in prostitution or procuring prostitutes within the past 10 years?

Have you ever been involved in, or do you seek to engage in, money laundering?

Do you seek to engage in espionage, sabotage, export control violations, or any other illegal activity while in the United States?

Have you ever committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in torture?

Have you committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in extrajudicial killings, political killings, or other acts of violence?
 
Laughed my ass off when I filled in my application. I wonder if someone ever checked "yes" in any of those...
 
They ask you these questions so they can revoke your visa if they later find out that you lied on your paperwork.
 
Laughed my ass off when I filled in my application. I wonder if someone ever checked "yes" in any of those...

Possibly, and you would be better off being upfront about it, instead of the FBI discovering that you lied on your visa application through their own background checks.
 
I can't of been the only one who thought the OP was talking about a Visa credit card application and was like "WHAT?"

Or, maybe I am.
 
I can't of been the only one who thought the OP was talking about a Visa credit card application and was like "WHAT?"

Or, maybe I am.

I thought it was a credit card app too and was very confused.

Also, to those who don't think someone would check yes, you'd be surprised.
 
Are you a member or representative of a terrorist organization?
Yes, I was part of the miners rebellion in the original Red Faction.

Have you ever ordered, incited, committed, assisted, or otherwise participated in genocide?
Lots. When playing the cuban missions in GTA Vice City I didn't leave any haitian alive.

Are you coming to the United States to engage in prostitution or unlawful commercialized vice or have you been engaged in prostitution or procuring prostitutes within the past 10 years?
Nope, I do that at home.

Have you ever been involved in, or do you seek to engage in, money laundering?
Yes, but only when it's money that I receive from Timedog.

Do you seek to engage in espionage, sabotage, export control violations, or any other illegal activity while in the United States?
I played Splinter Cell, so yes.

Have you ever committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in torture?
Being tortured in Metal Gear Solid counts as participating? If so, yeah sure.

Have you committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in extrajudicial killings, political killings, or other acts of violence?
C'mon dude, look at me: Do I look like I play freaking Kirby? (by the way, I totally do)
I wonder what would happen if someone answered this. Would they take it as a joke, or can it seriously send the joker to jail?
 
I wonder what would happen if someone answered this. Would they take it as a joke, or can it seriously send the joker to jail?
Is an automated process (online form), so I guess any yes question means an automatic rejection by the system.
 
I always feel embarassed when i give it to my customers, but it's needed for legal protection. You must prove to not know your customer is a terrorist, mafia affiliated etc... Or you could be charged for collusion.
 
Have you ever ordered, incited, committed, assisted, or otherwise participated in genocide?

Sounds like a Tuesday.

Have you ever committed, ordered, incited, assisted, or otherwise participated in torture?

I've participated in a GAF hype thread so I guess so.
 
I'm filling up an application form for a friend and the thing is hysterical. Do prostitutes, drug lords and terrorists have some kind of honour code that prevents them from lying? Just seems like an incredible waste of time for everyone involved.

Lying on your forms is illegal.
So if they find out you lied on the forms, they can kick you even if your terrorist hooker club is legal and respectable in your country.
If you tell the truth on the forms they can prevent you from ever getting in.
 
Have you ever been involved in, or do you seek to engage in, money laundering?
Yes, but only when it's money that I receive from Timedog.

Okay, I lost it.
KuGsj.gif
 
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