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Parent GAF - how to toughen up my son?
- Thread starter OZ9000
- Start date
deathsaber
Member
1. He's only 3
2. At this stage, the best you can do is establish some basic rules at home (basic obediance, maybe how much tv/screen time they get) and stick to them. Again, nothing too stringent and punative (he's only 3), but stick to them, and when he cries about a consequences, don't bend and let him learn about that conseqence.
3. Kids don't really hardcore really learn independence, coping, (ie "toughening up") until they are socialized. For some, this happens when they go to Kindergarten, for others (those who go to day cares and such) it will happen a bit earlier. But just being around other kids is where they kind of learn how to be in the world, share a space with others, and learn it isn't 100% about them. Just give it time. Kids need this time to adjust to how they will be in the world
4. He's only 3.
2. At this stage, the best you can do is establish some basic rules at home (basic obediance, maybe how much tv/screen time they get) and stick to them. Again, nothing too stringent and punative (he's only 3), but stick to them, and when he cries about a consequences, don't bend and let him learn about that conseqence.
3. Kids don't really hardcore really learn independence, coping, (ie "toughening up") until they are socialized. For some, this happens when they go to Kindergarten, for others (those who go to day cares and such) it will happen a bit earlier. But just being around other kids is where they kind of learn how to be in the world, share a space with others, and learn it isn't 100% about them. Just give it time. Kids need this time to adjust to how they will be in the world
4. He's only 3.
jufonuk
not tag worthy
But what if you went to fight someone BJJ style and they stand up and run off how can you chase them laying on the ground ? How ? I demand answers!!!
Yellow Bamboo is the way.
Behold the true martial art
I can’t do sarcasm.
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SirTerry-T
Member
When he hits his teens you will be wishing you still had the three year old version.
My lad is 14...love him to bits but he's turned into a right little sod!
My lad is 14...love him to bits but he's turned into a right little sod!
TheInfamousKira
Reseterror Resettler
I've heard that kneeling on rice works wonders. Get him a switch. One of those wooden paddles with the holes, not a Nintendo. When he gets in arguments with peers, break a pool cue in half and throw both pieces at them. Tell him to either come back with both, or not to come back at all.
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DeafTourette
Perpetually Offended
He's 3. A toddler. Every kid is different. He may never be what you want him to be and trying to force him that direction might lead to issues like estrangement down the line. Let him be. Kids need to be kids. And as they grow older, they tend to do this thing called 'change'... Their personalities might get slightly modified, they may get tougher or more emotional... It's a crap shoot
Bluecondor
Member
You have had some interesting advice in this thread, and I am certainly not going to argue against the advice to encourage him to try sports and martial arts, etc. to build confidence, as I love sports.
That said, your words "he loves cars" reminds me of one of the most important people from my childhood. My grandfather, who was born in 1908 and died in 1992 (I am turning 52 soon), was an incredible guy who loved cars, built his own house in the 1930s and drove a crane in a steel mill for 50+ years. My Mom had us spend time with our grandparents constantly while we were kids.
I was (and honestly still am) a pretty non-aggressive person, but my grandparents realized very early on that I had an interest in family history and history. They constantly told me stories about our family and told me all about things like the U.S. Civil War, the settling of the American West, World War I and World War II, the Great Depression and FDR's New Deal, and John F. Kennedy. What started as a basic childhood interest became my college major (American History and Political Science), and I finished undergrad in 2.5 semesters., as I could crank out history papers. I went on to get my doctorate (in business, but my dissertation was a business history topic) and I am a professor today.
While this is a nice story of how people can influence a kid's interests/career at a young age, I can honestly say that the greatest lessons my grandparents taught me were simply from spending time with them. They were amazing to our family and constantly involved with our relatives, and I got so much from being around them. I still see my Pap as the kind of guy I want to be when I "grow up."
If you have a friend or family member who is great to be around and maybe enjoys cars, this could be a life-changing person for your son. And, the best part about it is that it can just happen naturally.
lovetalkgames
Banned
He’s sweet because you’re sweet. You have the benefit of 30+ years to develop a persona worthy of covering up your weakness. He has nothing but his raw emotion.
Prison Mike
Banned
I_D
Member
Shock collars are pretty easy to get.
Many studies have shown that negative-reinforcement is a thing, so I suggest you look into it.
Any time your child acts up, just give him/her some love, ya know?
Many studies have shown that negative-reinforcement is a thing, so I suggest you look into it.
Any time your child acts up, just give him/her some love, ya know?
stn
Member
This is one of the best GIF responses I've seen in a long time, lmao. Perfect.
Crayon
Member
dr_octagon
Banned
nemiroff
Gold Member
I'm the father of a 14 month old and a 7 year old, so as usual with most parents we're much more relaxed and confident with the youngest one. First vs second is a well know thing.. But anyway, unless there's some issues in his environment there's nothing you should do per se in the short term or mid term. He's only three, so basic friendly but firm consistent rules and responsibilities (not many of those at three..) should be enough. Everything else is slowly building nuance with positive reinforcement, but with as little pressure as possible, hopefully none at all. Just one example of what I mean: If he falls f.ex., never do a "OMG!" and run to him to comfort him with the usual "oh no, you poor thing, let me hold you" etc., (the mother obviously needs to be included in this..) rather do a lightning quick assessment, and if he's ok, just let him get up again on his own and continue to be energetic and play with with like nothing happened. Small things like that goes a long way.
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Spaceman292
Banned
Get him a tattoo
PaddyOCanager
Member
Idk if the spelling errors were intentional but I literally choked on my drink.
dr_octagon
Banned
I'm a big fan of Chris Nolamb.
I collect VHS tapes
Member
make him get a job
*Nightwing
Banned
Thanks to another thread I think we’ve found the awnser for you OP
Play this to him 24x7 and rename the child
Richard Packer
But beware he will instantly change from a 3 year old into a man
Play this to him 24x7 and rename the child
Richard Packer
But beware he will instantly change from a 3 year old into a man
To be honest being a parent is the single most stressful thing on the planet.
Kids don't ever fucking listen to you.
My biggest gripe? He doesn't eat anything. He's so goddamn skinny.
I'm worried he's actually autistic. He's been throwing tantrums lately. Will go in the corner and start crying for now reason whatsoever.
Kids don't ever fucking listen to you.
My biggest gripe? He doesn't eat anything. He's so goddamn skinny.
I'm worried he's actually autistic. He's been throwing tantrums lately. Will go in the corner and start crying for now reason whatsoever.
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SirTerry-T
Member
Maybe parenting isn't your thing,
Probably because his Dad appears to be acting like a twat???!!?
saturnalian
Member
Edit, wrong quote
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Northeastmonk
Gold Member
Be thankful he is a sissy boy. Some boys have disabilities preventing them from communicating what they want to say. Some boys have the same mentality as little boys because their brain never developed.
People can’t see this and relate to it unless they go through it or have family/friends with a child with a disability. I can’t relate cause my son has a genetic disorder.
He’s 3. Kids still poop themselves at 3.
People can’t see this and relate to it unless they go through it or have family/friends with a child with a disability. I can’t relate cause my son has a genetic disorder.
He’s 3. Kids still poop themselves at 3.
Is he your only child ?
I have different problem or concern i have 2 girls the youngest she is 8 now is Autistic, now i have twin boys age 1 year and 10 months, still they didnt say a single word, when should i be concerned?
when should i start thinking about Autism for them, am I paranoid or not ? And how can i stimulate them to speak, i know for fact they behave differently than their sister when she was their age, but still the Autism part is haunting me
Any tips or advice is welcome
I have different problem or concern i have 2 girls the youngest she is 8 now is Autistic, now i have twin boys age 1 year and 10 months, still they didnt say a single word, when should i be concerned?
when should i start thinking about Autism for them, am I paranoid or not ? And how can i stimulate them to speak, i know for fact they behave differently than their sister when she was their age, but still the Autism part is haunting me
Any tips or advice is welcome
It isn't my thing and I didn't want to be a parent. I pushed my wife for an abortion but she didn't have it.
Look, I love my son, but being a parent is a lifetime of stress.
I just want him to do the basics. Eat some goddamn food kid.
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He's my first and last child. Won't have any more kids.
He should be speaking several words by age 2 and join two words together, and make/respond to commands.
I would speak to a doctor to ensure he doesn't have speech and language delay or possibly autism.
For what it's worth my son picked up speech far more quickly when we got him together with my niece, who is a chatterbox.
Unfortunately my son's favourite phrase is "go away".
Tells everyone to go away except my niece. Even tells me to go away when I try feeding him.
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