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WCW Monday Nitro 9/28/98
Hogan and Bischoff come to the ring. Solid start to the show. You know what's weird? Hogan, despite being the heel and terrified of Warrior, is actually the one to make the challenge for a match. Shortly after Hogan comes out, Hall comes out and Crush follows him. Hulk talks about how he took wrestling from $10K of revenue a night to hundreds of thousands a night. He made wrestling and everyone in it. "If they both want a piece of wood, I'll take them both in the center of the ring." He said "wood" at least 30 times. No idea what he was talking about, unless he meant his dick. Apparently he was, since he called himself the Woodmeister and said the Nitro Girls were down with him. And you can call him Woody, because he's just too sweet. The fuck are you talking about, Hogan? He challenged Bret and Sting, which was who he was referring to wanting a piece of his wood.
La Parka vs Super Calo
Parka is dressed as a matador tonight. OLE! I don't think Calo has been around since Jericho murdered him with a German suplex. Parka throws his sombrero at Calo so he can get his dancing in. Parka tries three times to hit a low blow. He finally does. Calo hits a diving rana. Parka goes flying into the ring post. A big dive from the top wipes both guys out. Parka looks to have injured his shoulder. Back in the ring, Parka gets back in control. He puts Calo in the tree of Joey Lawrence and hits a spin kick. Super rana is reversed. Calo is knocked to the apron. He does a leg stunner. Bouncy super rana only gets 2. Parka wins with a whisper in the wind. After the match, Calo attacks La Parka with his very own chair. What a dick.
TO THE MEAN GENE. Bret Hart comes out. Bret has been waiting for years to get a match with Hogan. He's going to FUCK HOGAN UP.
The Disciple vs Sick Boy
Despite being part of the OWN, Beefcake still comes out to the nWo theme. Fuck, Beefcake wrestling matches on Nitro in 1998. He wins with the ACE CRUSHA. I legit thought it was Riggs the entire match.
Recap of the last 2 months of the Steiner vs Steiner feud, which has been going on since February.
Scott Steiner vs Lenny Lane/Nick Dinsmore
Scott completely dominates and wins with a double Steiner Recliner. He falls to the mat after the match, holding his lower back. The trainer comes to check on him.
The lights go down. It's THE WARRIOR. Warrior walking to the ring is nonsense.
"Speak to me, warriors. Hogan, I know who you are and I know who I am and these warriors know what they want to see. Now ??? you bring nothing but disappointment and I can tell you warriors, I sense your disappointment and I say to you , that I have a message for you, Hogan. And that messages goes like this. Since my return, you have brought nothing before me except a pittance of a man I once knew. You have *Fan is tackled by security trying to enter the ring* That, Hogan, is disappointment. That, Hogan, is a lost warrior. Because you have not faced the challenge. The ultimate challenge. The thing that scares you the most when you see me, Hogan, is that you see a small piece of what you used to be. I refuse to make myself less than what I am until you, Hogan, find who you need to be. At Halloween Havoc, I will become full blown. And you Hogan will face the challenge once again for the second time in your life. I want to feel the power of the warriors!"
For some reason, that promo reminded me of the Genesis of McGillicutty.
TO THE MEAN GENE. He wants to ask Buff some questions about what happened with Scott Steiner. He says that Scotty was put in the ambulance and is on his way to the hospital. Maniacal laughing starts up again. It distracts Buff. "Gene, does it look like the word doctor is written on my forehead?" Scotty has ruptured discs and may have 6 or 7 of them now.
Hypnosis vs The Cat
Hypno doesn't take the chance to leave. Maybe he doesn't understand English. It plays out like every Cat match for the past month or so. A dropkick to the knee slows Cat down for a while. Hypno goes for a super rana, but the ref won't let him. That's kind of strange. He instead tries a spin wheel kick, but is caught and muscled up and down. Cat wins with the Feliner.
TO THE MEAN GEAN. He brings Alex Wright out. He immediately runs Gene off and starts speaking German. "Look at him, an old old midget!" Lol. He says that the Bulldog is afraid of him.
Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs Disco Inferno
I assume Disco made weight since this is again a number one contender match. Disco almost breaks Pepe, but decides against it. However, this pissed Chavo off and hit hits a Thesz press and punches Disco until he bails to the floor. Chavo hits a pescado. Big facebuster. Atomic drop. Lariatoo. Chavo is on a roll. Disco hits the second rope elbow. Disco jabs Chavo in the throat with Pepe and pins Chavo. Juvi again comes out to narc. He'll face Kaz Hayashi later to be the other contender. I guess there was a mini tournament going on. Piledriver to Juvi. He really has it coming.
TO THE MEAN GENE. He brings out the Four Horsemen. I wonder if they'll talk about their rape party they had with Liz. That blows my mind that they really said that they had her tied up in a hotel and were going to take turns with her. As faces. Even as heels that would be way way way over the line. Bischoff, Stevie Ray, and Doug Dillinger come out. And some police. Arn committed felonious assault on Thunder and is under arrest. But for some reason, all of them are being escorted away. Including Dillinger. Eric says Ric is pathetic for trying to live his life vicariously through his ten year old son. Maybe Eric should have had them arrested for kidnapping, holding someone captive, and gang rape.
Chris Jericho vs Goldberg WCW Unified Championship
Jericho has a new ninja. He actually found his way to the ring this time. Goldberg comes out with MiniBerg over his shoulder. Jericho shoves two of his ninjas into a spear. He runs away. I don't know where Ralphus went.
TO THE MEAN GENE. DDP comes to the ring. Gene compares Goldberg/DDP to McGuire/Sosa. He makes sure to get Hollywood SCUM Hogan in, even where it has no place. The idea of facing Goldberg gets him JACKED to the moon. He talks about about all the stables right now and says he's black and blue, he's DDP, and he's 4REAL. I find it kind of weird that Goldberg and DDP have had no interaction. Goldberg is basically still feuding with the nWo and now Jericho.
Scott Hall vs Kidman
Virgil will now only let Hall have a drink if he wins. I'm not sure that's any better for his problem. Kidman's music hit before Hall even got in the ring, and then stopped because they remembered Hall always does a pre-match promo. His survey tonight is "Does it taste great, or is it less filling?". Hall might be sober for the match. Kidman doesn't back down, but gets the shit chopped out of him. He wanted a drink. Virgil wouldn't give it to him, but a fan in the front row was willing. This gives Kidman a chance to get some quick roll ups in. Abdominal stretch. Short chokeslam. Lol, he still mocks The Giant after doing it. He forces Virgil to give him a drink. Kidman then dives on Virgil and knocks the cup out of Hall's hand. Tornado bulldog. Crossbody. Hall stops the come back with the fall away slam. Hall makes the big mistake of trying a normal powerbomb instead of the Razor's Edge. He goes for his actual move a second time and hits it. Hall wins.
British Bulldog vs Alex Wright
Davey talks about his young son being better than Alex Wright, and the fans of Germany love him. He then says "Suck it" in German and English. I think he actually called Alex a dick licker. For real. But in German, so it's okay to say. A ref bump. Another ref comes out and Alex hits a back suplex with a pin. Both men get their shoulders up at 2, but each ref saw it from the opposite side and called the match for the one they saw. So then the refs argue.
Brian Adams vs Kevin Nash
Some kid runs out and poses in front of Nash on the ramp, not unlike that one weird backstage segment with Batista. Stevie Ray and Virgil run out. Slapjack right in the head. Hall bounces out as well. He pours his drink out and starts punching Nash. Lex and Konnan hit the ring and run everyone off.
Lex Luger/Konnan vs Hugh Morrus/Barry Darsow
Why isn't this Hugh and Barb? You know, since they're team mates and all. Smash taps to the torture rack.
Bret Hart vs Hollywood Hogan
First time ever match, on Nitro, with no hype given. "And now, coming to the ring wearing black and grape..." Black and grape? Lol, Buffer. This actually kind of has some build, both in the last few weeks and in general for the hype of these two against each other, but zero warning was given for it. Hulk runs Bret over with a shoulder block. Hulk actually does some wrestling, which is easily countered by Bret. Rolling cross arm breaker from Hulk! Axeuu BOMBAAA. Bret dodges some elbow drops and knocks Hulk to the floor. Hogan goes into the ring post. It goes back to the floor. Hulk drops Bret knee first on the railing a few times. Hulk continues to work over the knee in the ring. Spinning toe hold. I'm sure Dory Funk Sr. could do a better one even today. Sting comes out to stop Hogan from injuring Bret further. Konnan and Lex also come out. They forcefully put Bret on a stretcher. Sting takes his jacket off and I guess now we have Sting vs Hogan.
Sting vs Hollywood Hogan
Fucking lol, Hogan has been wrestling for 7 minutes or so. Sting is fresh. And Hogan is IMMEDIATELY on the offense with Sting being down and out after 3 moves. As Bret is being put in the ambulance, Buff and Steiner were disguised as doctors (despite Scott still being in his wrestling gear) and attack. Bret hobbles back to the ring. Hogan is still dominating Sting. Leg drop is missed. Stinger splash. Deathlock. Bret gets back in the ring and DDT's Sting. SWERVE! Hogan bows to Bret. Sharpshooter on Sting! Bret then gets a chair and smashes Sting's leg with it a few times. Bret started for the ring post figure four and just gave up without actually doing it. Konnan runs to the ring. Lex comes out and gets Sting out of the ring. Fans are filling the ring with trash. The house lights go out and WE'RE OUTTA TIME!
Lol at WCW always shit talking with how they deliver on matches they promote, then go on to have Hogan vs Bret and Hogan vs Sting, completely unhyped and have then have them be 5 minutes each with no finish to either of them. The shit WCW gave away on TV just in 1998 is pretty crazy. Sting vs DDP. Goldberg vs Sting. Savage vs Hogan. Hogan vs Goldberg. Bret vs Hogan. Sting vs Nash. Hogan/Bret vs Sting/Lex. Hogan/Savage vs Sting/Lex. Goldberg vs The Giant. Hogan vs DDP (maybe the worst, since that feud had 2-3 months of build up with the shitty celebrity matches and then a random match on Nitro with no finish was the blow off). DDP vs Bret. Hogan vs Piper.
In theory, pretty much all of those should have either been PPV main events or at least featured bouts.