ClanOfNone
Member
9 years today!!
Living proof that it can be done, keep fighting Sober gaf!
Living proof that it can be done, keep fighting Sober gaf!
fuck yes dude! thats an incredible achievement. im just over three years sober from alcohol. its amazing how difficult it was at first compared to now. at first i stopped and started a million times and just thought i was going to be stuck in that cycle forever, and now i can go entire days without even thinking about drinking.9 years today!!
Living proof that it can be done, keep fighting Sober gaf!
brother i cant tell you how much this sounds like myself a few years ago. its like you took the thoughts right out of my head.I need to get on the sobriety wagon for a while. I'm not looking to completely abstain long term but I've come to realize while I may not be a textbook 'alcoholic' I have a toxic relationship with alcohol that needs to change. I've fallen into a routine where I drink probably 4 nights a week, and because of my tolerance level I drink more than I should each time.
I've had a dependency for a long time now. It's never to the point where I *have* to drink, but I start to really crave it whenever I go a few days sober. My main problem is I have very little self discipline and don't tell myself "no" often enough. The pandemic made things worse, because I've been working from home and bored all the time with everyone distanced and everything shut down.
I'm 33 and finally reaching an age where my body just can't deal with the booze the way it used to. I don't experience conventional hangovers, probably because I'm so tolerant at this point, but I feel like shit physically and mentally the day after drinking which didn't used to be the case. Our first kid is on the way this November, so now's really the time to take a hard look at my behaviors and treat alcohol like the once-in-a-while indulgence it always should've been.
Thanks for your advice and response! I really appreciate it and it's nice that there's a community thread with people going through the same stuff.brother i cant tell you how much this sounds like myself a few years ago. its like you took the thoughts right out of my head.
i decided to quit for 4 years, to finish school and get my music career on path. im happy to say it's been a little over 3 years and ive not only achieved my goals but also surpassed where i thought i would. to say it was one of the best decisions ive ever made in my life would be an understatement. it is, without a doubt, THE best decision ive ever made.
it sounds to me like youre in the right head space and on the right track. the best advice ic an give you to start, is to make a quit date, or even a quit week or quit month. but you need to have a deadline to work towards. if youre willy nilly about when youre going to quit, then there is always a chance youll say "just one more night", and that is a cycle im very familiar with, and it never works.
it has to be a deliberate, purposeful decision. and you are the only one who can put that decision into action. no one else can do it for you.
one of the things that helped me the most was telling myself it wanst forever. just enough to get my stuff on track. truth be told i could start drinking again right now, since i accomplished my goals. but much like making the quit date and sticking to it, ive made a promise to myself to stop for 4 solid years and im going to keep to it.
be true to yourself. do the things that you said you were gonna do. myself and many others ITT are living proof that it will all be worth it. maybe for you its a month, or a year, or more. but what ever you do, make a choice. just decide what its going to be and put into action, without ever looking back.
it sounds like you have some big priorities coming up, and you know what you need to do. now its time to make a plan and do it. best of luck to you. please come back and share your journey with us once in a while. it really helps to fortify people on their sober journeys, and gives a lot fo inspiration for people to start their very own.
thanks for sharing!
Looks like me in my early 30s also. I'm getting bad gastrointestinal pain. Thing is now I refuse do drink before 1600 so I end up passing out drunk after 10 drinks, which is the limit for physical addiction.I started having terrible social anxiety when I hit my teenage years. Up until 17 I was Mr. Introvert, I stayed home read tons of books, played pc games and DnD with a small group of like minded nerdy folk.
Finally got dragged to a party at 17 and got drunk for the first time and it was love at first sight. Suddenly all the fear and angst was gone, replaced by liquid courage, I absolutely loved it. I scraped and scavenged booze wherever I could, and when I hit 21 it was on.
By the time I was 30 I was a 24/7 drunk, consuming anywhere from 1 to 2 liters of vodka daily.
By the time I was 35 I was almost dead. Was hospitalized for a week with a ruptured esophagus, went through 6 or 7 medical detoxes and 90 days of inpatient rehab.
FINALLY, I split from the world's most toxic relationship and I quit the next day and ain't picked it up since.
An old timer once told me "When you are ready to quit it'll be the easiest thing you've ever done, the trick is surviving that long."
The one alcohol free night a week sounds like a great start. I would definitely keep trying that if you can.After tonight's date, I really want to sober up. I tried many times and I always fall in the same routine. My body aches and am tired of it and I want to stop before I damage my liver and other organs too much. I went to different psychiatrists and since I don't seem to have a physical dependance on alcohol, I can't get professional help. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and no medication works besides alcohol for me. I take about 12 drinks a day plus 3 ativans and GABA supplements. I've been doing a sober night a week for the last month. I do not have any withdrawal symptoms besides a slight insomnia that night.
I train an hour daily, work about ten hours a day, eat mostly cleanly, but when darkness comes, I need to drink if not I can't sleep and I drink until I pass out because I feel so good mentally when I'm drunk. Been doing that for the last decade. I may not have long to live so I would like to know how you guys do it. I did a few group sessions and individual sessions and in the first, I can't be talking I get tetany attacks, and the psychologists I talked to were of no help.
Try L-Theanine supplements, it works way better than ativan for me. Start with 100mg every hour. It affects your brain the same way alcohol do without the physical addiction.took benzos again yesterday for the first time in a long time, i fucked up royaly with my girlfriend at a party during the weekend... so i was feeling like shit during the aftermath and needed to cope alone with some pills. so yeah no one to blame but myself. upwards and onward. i really don't care or see it as a problem that i drink as its super rare, its more the pills that i never want to touch again. not that i really had a big problem with them, i used to do them twice a week with alcohol for a year/two. but its enough of a problem for me to not want to do it anymore.
but one thing im starting to notice is when i drink i say yes to every drug in front of me if there are any without any moderation, i just go all out and end up doing something stupid as fuck that i would never do sober. on the bright side my friend circle dont do hard drugs.
So you replace alcohol with L-Theanine?Try L-Theanine supplements, it works way better than ativan for me. Start with 100mg every hour. It affects your brain the same way alcohol do without the physical addiction.
Yes.So you replace alcohol with L-Theanine?
This has been my modus operandi for the past few years.but at least 2-3 drinks after work every day (and sometimes more) while cooking and having dinner etc.
This has been my modus operandi for the past few years.
I'll probably have to find other holistic ways to wind down my day before I destroy my liver.
And being drunk is the best feeling in the world, curse you tomorrow's bloody stools and stomach ulcers.I'll be drinking tonight, I need to sleep.
Someone made a thread in OT not long about wanking off 11 times a day.A little NSFW so I'll just spoiler it.
I've been diagnosed with bipolar disorder since late 2016 and one of the things it can do is make your sexual drive very hyperactive. When I get like that, I jerk off like crazy and it's something I feel uncomfortable with - and I haven't been able to find out what it is. I want to stop masturbating so often but when that feeling comes, I pretty much HAVE to do it.
Just be miserable man. I don't wanna lose you.So after a year of ping-pong from one psychiatrist to another, this one I talked to today specializes in alcohol addiction. He was blunt about my situation, either you live as a happier drunk for ten years because you'll die from it or be miserable for the rest of your life. He said he never met a patient with so much anxiety symptoms as me and he saw all the medication I tried with no results and it was baffling. Basically I'm screwed either way.
So after a year of ping-pong from one psychiatrist to another, this one I talked to today specializes in alcohol addiction. He was blunt about my situation, either you live as a happier drunk for ten years because you'll die from it or be miserable for the rest of your life. He said he never met a patient with so much anxiety symptoms as me and he saw all the medication I tried with no results and it was baffling. Basically I'm screwed either way.
I find replacing the vice with something else that's fun or productive has been key to me...if I'm sitting around bored, it's really tempting to want to just go grab a 12 pack and go to town. Lately I've been trying to fill up my schedule...exercise, practicing music, chores around the house. It hasn't happened overnight but over the course of the last year I've dropped to a weight I haven't been at in like 11 years and I'm really enjoying the outdoorsy stuff more when I don't feel out of shape...even hiking with my toddler in a backpack carrier feels like nothing. I've also been shopping for motorcycles lately, which I think is another thing that I could just go do if I'm feeling bored and tempted. Whatever it is...I'm sure you can find something to replace the vice.I went on a stay-cation and basically binge drank for 10 days straight. Oh boy it's now 5 days later and just now starting to feel ok. Said I'm quitting for the foreseeable future. See how long that lasts (I'm not a spring chicken so it is affecting me worse and worse).
Water damage in the house basement nearly destroyed me last week. Had to vent elsewhere so went to Toronto. I feel a bit better today thanks.Personally, I would be super bummed if you weren’t around to post on Gaf. I enjoy what you share here. If you ever need to chat, hit me up in PM man.
awesome! hope you are still doing well. drop by and let us know how its going, would lvoe to here how your journey is going.Yeah day 3 here also, just had a week long bender fueled by speed, acid, weed and ofc the booze.
My bed at night is like a fucking pool of sweat.
hope you are doing well. the journey can be harrowing but its all worth it. i read your other posts but this one sticks out to me bc i think its important to remember and remind yourself why you want to get clean. sorry i wasnt here to respond more timely.After tonight's date, I really want to sober up. I tried many times and I always fall in the same routine. My body aches and am tired of it and I want to stop before I damage my liver and other organs too much. I went to different psychiatrists and since I don't seem to have a physical dependance on alcohol, I can't get professional help. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and no medication works besides alcohol for me. I take about 12 drinks a day plus 3 ativans and GABA supplements. I've been doing a sober night a week for the last month. I do not have any withdrawal symptoms besides a slight insomnia that night.
I train an hour daily, work about ten hours a day, eat mostly cleanly, but when darkness comes, I need to drink if not I can't sleep and I drink until I pass out because I feel so good mentally when I'm drunk. Been doing that for the last decade. I may not have long to live so I would like to know how you guys do it. I did a few group sessions and individual sessions and in the first, I can't be talking I get tetany attacks, and the psychologists I talked to were of no help.
musician here as well and having that was a massive help for me. i even started picking up other hobbies like drawing, painting, writing, etc. this is great advice as boredom is one of the biggest hurdles in getting clean. for me, that feeling of boredom was the beginning of the end. i knew wants that boredom set in, it was only a matter of hours before i found myself driving up tot he liquor store. hobbies and activities are immensely important. great post.This might sound cheesy or obvious, but replacing the vice of choice was key to me. I’m an amateur drummer, and when I stopped drinking I really needed to pay attention to how bored I’d feel sometimes and how that would kinda trigger my cravings. Well, filling up the time with hobbies was great to take my mind off things, and guess what? I’m way better now that I’m consistently practicing and doing so sober.
Also, cannabis isn’t terrible for the system like alcohol, and I don’t feel any addiction to it, so I allow myself that in moderation. Everyone’s different though and legality may vary so it might not be the best option for everyone.
youre doing great bud! just the fact that you check in so much here and with other threads shows you are on the right track. keep it going no matter how bumpy the road is.Two days porn sober. I've been having an on-off relationship with it these past few months.
thats awesome man. glad to hear from you, hope you are doing well. cooking, much like a hobby or activity, is a great thing to have to look forward to at night. cooking is therapeutic, a wholesome activity, TASTY and even more enjoyable with friends and family (and typically healthier and cheaper than eating out or ordering food). i tend to not want to get smashed (bc i have to cook lol), so i just have a glass or two of wine, and after eating i feel really refreshed and relaxed, which usually leads into me winding down for the night and going to bed. so i dont have time to get hammered and i feel great the next morning.My father died due to alcoholism so I know addiction runs in the family. I cant remember the last time I went 2 days without a drink. Going to try to cut back. I'm not getting smashed nightly but at least 2-3 drinks after work every day (and sometimes more) while cooking and having dinner etc.
Kev Kev check in when you get a chance brotha
hell yeah! yeah those headaches are a bitch. i tried to not take too much, but aspirin was my best friend after the headaches started. they died down after a month or two. glad to hear you are doing well, keep it going!Still no alcohol since February 11 for me. I think the withdrawal headaches finally stopped. I had about a month of monster headaches, same as the last time I stopped.
I'm planning to stay completely booze free for a few more months then just drink on special occasions... which may or may not be a great plan, as that's what led me to start drinking again after I stopped the last time.
i dont miss hangovers lol. congrats on trying to make a change. hope youre doing okay!I went on a stay-cation and basically binge drank for 10 days straight. Oh boy it's now 5 days later and just now starting to feel ok. Said I'm quitting for the foreseeable future. See how long that lasts (I'm not a spring chicken so it is affecting me worse and worse).
great post. thank you for sharing this is really good stuff. you never know who is reading and how it could positively affect them and their sober journeys.Nice to see this thread, especially since I used to participate in Reddit stopdrinking only to find out I’ve been shadowbanned on Reddit somehow.
I’ve been clean more than I haven’t been since Jan 2020. But I made the call that Twosday 22/2/22 would be starting day for being sober forever.
For those interested, I found William Porter’s Alcohol Explained hit the right notes for me, and his Friday night YouTube videos have a good way to frame alcohol.
I’ve started to internally use language like ‘I don’t use alcohol” and see that as helping. Plus old standbys like:
No one regrets not drinking
Play the tape forward
One is too many and a hundred not enough
Really it comes down to wanting to be in as fully control of my mental and physical state as possible. It’s tough. I got through a solo trip out west going to restaurants and bars ordering NA beers, mock tails, sodas, and kombuchas. Definitely tested the sober muscle. Helped I was driving and doing a bunch of hikes in the trip, so hungover would have been a waste. But with that behind me, I built some good patterns to continue with being back in the city.
Well I'm on day 15 without drinking. Yes, don't miss the hangovers, fast beating heart, sweats, high blood pressure, dehydration. So far so good. Don't know how long it will last. My brother may be coming down next weekend and we always go out drinking. So that would be about 3.5 weeks sober. Longest in a while.i dont miss hangovers lol. congrats on trying to make a change. hope youre doing okay!
Congratulations on 15 days! Those are usually the hardest and you’re getting some great benefits so far. Others that kicked in around the 3-4 week mark were appreciably better skin and a bit of weight loss without much change. You could always try to talk your bro into a non-drinking activity. Or if you’re hitting a bar try to find one with a non-alcohol beer. Bars and socializing are always a trigger, but somehow I’ve gotten through a few dates on NA beer these last two months.I check out the menu in advance to know exactly what to order. Best of luck.Well I'm on day 15 without drinking. Yes, don't miss the hangovers, fast beating heart, sweats, high blood pressure, dehydration. So far so good. Don't know how long it will last. My brother may be coming down next weekend and we always go out drinking. So that would be about 3.5 weeks sober. Longest in a while.
how do you feel in general? good? bad? about the same?Still sober since February 11th here. I’ve felt tempted a couple times but didnt give in. The waistline is shrinking too.
I drink because my life without drinking is way worse, but my health is getting too bad. I've been feeling miserable all week. Physically I look in shape, have great skin, look younger than my age, so I doubt I'll see any improvement long term. I already train an hour a day.how do you feel in general? good? bad? about the same?
i remember having a few months of absolute funk inncluding anxiety and depression, but after that things shot straight back up and i was energetic as hell, happier, lost wieght, etc. im always curious to see what other peoples time line is like after they stop.
I’ve been dropping weight like motherfucker this year. I’m the lightest I’ve been in probably 13 years and about to get below 200 (@ 6’2”), feels good. Also exercising is way more doable when you’re not hung over or joints feeling achey and shit.Still sober since February 11th here. I’ve felt tempted a couple times but didnt give in. The waistline is shrinking too.
Main thing is the headaches. This is the 2nd time I quit alcohol. The first in 2020 I had headaches for about a month and then they went away. This time it's been almost 3 months of frequent headaches. They usually go away for a week or 2, then come back for another week or 2. I'm not sure if it's from the alcohol tho.how do you feel in general? good? bad? about the same?
i remember having a few months of absolute funk inncluding anxiety and depression, but after that things shot straight back up and i was energetic as hell, happier, lost wieght, etc. im always curious to see what other peoples time line is like after they stop.