The Drunkest you've ever been?

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Nameless

Nameless

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Theres this annual college football game that happens here, and the football game is secondary to the crazy "tailgating"(basically a huge ass street party) and all the parties that go on. Well last year me and my friends go out there, I plan on getting eradicated to begin but my car is in the shop, so I don't have to worry about some stupid thing like driving holding me back.

Lets just say this...I bought a 1.75 liter of Vodka, and Finished just over half of in within a 3 hour period ro so. To this day I have NO idea what happened. We went to this club, and this party afterwards and I can't recall a damn thing that happened that night. I vaugely remember being dropped off at home, but for the most part everything is a blur until I wake up(fully clothed) with a massive headache.
 
Now this is my kind of topic. :lol

I can't decide between two separate occasions... One time I was at one of those two day career conferences in college with my girlfriend at the time. I didn't want her to get too messed up, so whatever she took a sip of I quickly slammed down whenever she lowered the cup. Then for whatever insane reason she decided that she wanted to do shots, and I joined her. Only thing we had around was Grey Goose. Needless to say, we killed the whole bottle, along with the bottle of Remy Red we were drinking, and a half empty bottle of tequila my friend couldn't finish. All I remember is the next morning I had to crawl to the bathroom. She told me I was singing show tunes and doing cartwheels, but I really don't remember.

Then of course the legendary night where I figured I could drink a bottle of Skyy and a bottle of Brugal by myself. Somehow I ended up in my car which was running when i came to at 5 AM. It took incredible focus to drive home. I haven't really been a crazy drinker since that night. :lol
 
I walked around with a blanket around my waist and walked into Whataburger and hit on the cashier... thats about it... and about 3 am I fell down and remembered not getting up.


Oh yea its all on video too lol...
 
I wound up with a guy in my lap in Reno... but I'd do it again, even if I was sober. :D

The only ugly moment was that an hour after I went to bed, there was a fire alarm, so I had to get up, get dressed, and stumble down eight flights of stairs to stand out in the freezing cold, at 3 am. That sucked. I remember going down a spiral staircase, and I felt incredibly dizzy and blurry. I was barely hanging on to my motor skills enough to not fall to my death. On the day down I almost stepped in a puddle of vomit, which I would later have to swear was not mine.

I haven't even come close to drinking that much since.
 
Probably that night I hooked up with my best friend's little sibling and got into a horrible car accident. That would be the most intoxicated night ever, though; not just drunk.
 
Probably when I got kicked out of the club and on the way home in the cab I groped my roommates best friend (a girl). He was pissed as hell but in the front seat. I passed out right when I got in the front door and they dragged me across the carpet to the bathroom giving me a huge rug burn on my stomach. Then I got up and went to the bathroom and passed out taking a piss.

Don't remember any of this. Just woke up on the couch in the morning in my boxers smelling like piss. Such a bad night. :lol
 
Probably the time I drank so much rum I burnt my stomach lining and spent the next 36 hours unable to keep anything down, not even water.

Yeah, that was fun.
 
A few years back I got most of the way through a 1125 bottle of bacardi on my own, I spent most of the early night asking everyone who kept stealing my bacardi, turns out it was me. My friends rolled me off the bonnet of the car by driving and then stopping real quick and left me in town as I was so annoying. My next recollection is walking into my driveway in my socks covered in mud and missing my wallet.......

I had to go to my pizza delivery job the next day as well. I'm pretty sure I drove around piss drunk the entire day.
 
Oh, I'll add that a close friend of mine once got so drunk he had to go to hospital and get his stomach pumped as a result of mixing wine and vodka. In all fairness though, he was 13 and didn't know any better.
 
I used to be a major league drunk so I've got hundreds of "way too drunk" stories. One good one was New years Eve '99, I was drinking vodka with friends for a few hours, then went to a bar and kept doing Carbomb after Carbomb. That's where you take a pint of Guiness, drop a shot of Jameson inside and chug it down. Probably did a dozen in an hour. Apparently at one point I stormed through the kitchen of the bar knocking things off the shelf, got into a fight with one of the cooks and woke up in an alley the next day with a missing tooth, a black eye and a large chunk of flesh in my right hand missing. I don't remember a thing, this was all told to me the next day.

Or one time when I drank wayyyy too much beer and whiskey and smoked pot while already on a bad hangover and puked so violently I blew out the blood vessels around my eyes, making me look like a deformed mongoloid for the next two days.
 
hahaha, oh boy. started off with me getting a fucking fifth of Popov Blue Label (Worst vodka you'll ever have) and making about 3 screwdrivers. Then I was drunk enough to start drinking right from the bottle. (I still get sick thinking about it to this day.) Anyways, then we started battle rapping in my room, and me and this guy kept it going for like 10 minutes straight... everyone cheering us on and acting like we were on 8 Mile.

then we go on our crusade. We decide to take back goods of the people from the Church. We ended up stealing 2 signs and then a bible from the youth group on campus. This was after me, in my AMAZINGLY articulate drunkenness, trying to discuss the benefits of non-denomination when it comes to religion. Right about now I've had about 75% of a fifth, in about two and a half hours. (No lie, either.... i'm really not exaggerating that time frame.) So then we take off, after the young churchers gave me a free hot dog from their grill. And we started walking more, and my buddy grabbed my fifth from me while we were going down the street and threw it in the road, saying it was empty. I proceeded to yell at him using a Towelie voice (read: "you asshole!") and then he yelled back and we sat in the sidewalk laughing our asses off. I was told later that we were there laughing for like half an hour, while the rest of our crew went to a party nearby.

Then we headed back. I ended up meeting some weird dude who was even drunker than I was, then sprinted down the road all the way back to my dorm (like an easy 200 yard dash, hahaha). I kinda blacked out after that. But I woke up a few hours later passed out in my own vomit on the bathroom floor. So I woke up and crawled into my bed. Then I got up again, hungover as shit, and we had a HUGE construction hose in our living room, haha. No idea how it got there. My buddy Dirk said he brought it in. Also regaled me with the story of how I army-crawled across the room to the shower where I proceeded to vomit.

What sucked is that afterwards, during my hangover, I also contracted the flu. This was 2 years ago, when the flu was really, really bad, too, if you all remember. So I was in bed, couldn't hold down liquids or foods for 3 days, then went to the ER. Then got back and had my ex spoonfeed me soup while i was in bed.

Needless to say, those 3 days taught me a severe fucking lesson about drinking. Only do it in moderation. To this day, I can't even so much as smell vodka without wanting to gag. I haven't gotten that drunk since, and I always set myself up so that I only have enough liquor to drink to get drunk on, and nothing more (as in, i've taken to only buying pints of liquor instead of entire fifths).

These stories are fun and all, but I wouldn't wish the aftereffects of that shit on my worst enemies.
 
miyuru said:
Wine + vodka = ?

It's all alcohol, how is this an especially bad mix?
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Unless it's a dry wine, it usually has a good bit of sugar in it. Lots of sugar mixed with heavy alcohol is a sure fire recipe for disaster. Trust me, I've witnessed the effects first hand.
 
I had 11 shots within 30 minutes.. needless to say, it's the only night I dont remember like a 3-hour block of time. Apparently I was quite.. touchy feely. What a waste considering I dont even have a recollection of it. :(
 
Threw up from a friend's balcony, had sex with a classmate who absolutely considered a friend in the apartment the party was on, got beaten up and finally slept in front of the door of my apartment. These and other horrible details which I can't remember or don't want mention just in one night. I was 16-17 at the time and wasn't that familiar with tequila. I was so embarassed by the whole thing that I skipped school for 2 days straight after that.

PS. Am I the only one who doesn't have blackouts after lots and lots of drinking? Most of the times no matter how drunk I am I remember almost everything after it.
 
Well, last Friday... I had 1/4 bottle of Grey Goose, then moved on the Anorexic Punch (5 glasses worth (probably another 1/3 bottle of vodka)) and add that with about 4 beers. I threw up for 30 minutes straight apparently. Woke up at chick's place who brought me to the party on her couch, feeling pretty damn good. My stomach kinda hurt the rest of the day though. I'll more shamed by the embarrassment tomorrow at work.

21st Birthday was the other bad time. 18 shots in an hour and 45 minutes...
20_drip.jpg

20_happybdayryan.jpg
 
Ended up walking back to my car from the club, turning it on, turning on the heat, and falling asleep in downtown Philly. I had every intention of driving but good thing I didn't. Woke up around 6 feeling nice and toasty, popped that bitch into drive and was still a lil swervy on my way home. Not the drunkest but probably the stupidest.
 
Ugh. Well, that amounts to one of three events. My first semester in college saw me blind stupid on the floor of the dorm bathrooms on many occasions. The most "memorable" (from what I have had pieced together for me by others) involved a Halloween party. I'd not eaten much that evening apart from ramen noodles and perhaps some saltines. Understand that I was one of those good kid types in high school and didn't start down the path towards any serious alcoholism until this point.

Anyhow, the challenge was laid out before me that, were I to drink three 40 oz malt liquors before midnight (an hour away), I could have the fourth for free. Fantastic bargain! So I consumed with gusto. At 11:57 I claimed my prize and, since it was still early, began on that one as well.

Now, as it turns out, I am a very, very loud vomiter: the sort who, batlike, directs myself to the bottom of the toilet bowl by echo location. Four hours I screamed at that loo as if it had taken my sister's honor, making the whole fourth floor and parts of the third aware of my comsumption. Every once in a while, a pair of feet would appear in the stall beside me. Even the most malicious of dormmates would have a slightly softer tone in their voice: abject pity. The stupidest of them offered me a beer to calm the stomach.

It was a marathon night. By morning, when my roommate dragged me, empty, across the hall and to bed, I doubt anyone on the floor, save one, had gotten a bit of sleep. Here's the kicker, though: I didn't have the reputation. No one but a few of those at the party knew it was me. Everyone else just assumed it had been the host of the party who had build quite the reputation for himself when it came to drinking himself unconscious. He was hounded for weeks about the matter. Thing is, he was the one who had gotten the sleep. He too had passed out and couldn't for the life of him remember whether or not he had been the mysterious screaming puker of floor 4.

That same year saw me unconscious on my back in a snowy field, a fifth of Jack and a Triple Fat Goose parka keeping me alive, and another morning wherein I awoke to a hangover of no less than 8 different liquors and the shrill laughter of an unsympathetic Japanese exchane student whose birthday I had apparently made memorable. Maybe for her, but all I can recall is grabbing her Korean boyfriend and demanding to go on a road march across campus. I think we got about 250 feet.

Oh... and then there was the Sony party. Best not dwell on that, though.
 
The night after I told my folks that I was a gay, I invited some close friends over and drank a good litre and a bit of vodka, I couldn't even walk, apparently I was crawling around the room and I couldn't even talk properly either, then I passed out on the floor at some point.
 
I've never been drunk enough to have stories but my friends have a few:


I have one friend that, after getting drunk, went to go take a crap. Only he fell asleep on the toilet after finishing said crap. Then a few hours later he woke up and had to turn around to puke on his crap.


Same friend also once got drunk and then was (so I'm told) like walking around in this field or something. And then he took off his shoes (he doesn't know why) and then later when he tried to put his shoes back on he fell over and then couldn't stand back up again for a while. He kept falling down any tome he tried to stand or put on his shoes.


a different friend got drunk and tried to walk home and somehow managed to walk like 4 miles in the opposite direction of his apartment and had to call someone on his cell phone to look up on yahoo maps where the hell he was and how to get home.
 
Current king of the crop is when I had to crash at a friend's place, threw up on his floor, and after profusely apologizing, took his advice and when to take a shower to clean up. Only his girlfriend's friend was taking a shower, so we showered together, proceeded to make out, I threw up in her mouth, and we then afterwards proceeded to put on a public show for a few hours until we passed out. Unfortunately for me, I woke up at 7am and had to drive to work, sans my boxers, and do a full 8-10 hour shift somewhere between drunk and hungover in my cubicle.
 
Macam said:
Current king of the crop is when I had to crash at a friend's place, threw up on his floor, and after profusely apologizing, took his advice and when to take a shower to clean up. Only his girlfriend's friend was taking a shower, so we showered together, proceeded to make out, I threw up in her mouth, and we then afterwards proceeded to put on a public show for a few hours until we passed out. Unfortunately for me, I woke up at 7am and had to drive to work, sans my boxers, and do a full 8-10 hour shift somewhere between drunk and hungover in my cubicle.
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Wait, so after you threw up in her mouth, you STILL got action?

How drunk was SHE!?
 
I set the limit at not being able to walk straight. Getting to the vomiting threshold is just plain, consummate stupidity.
 
Leon said:
I set the limit at not being able to walk straight. Getting to the vomiting threshold is just plain, consummate stupidity.
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If you drink fast enough, even if you stop you can feel completely sober then over the course of an hour it will all start to hit you and you can get to vomit stage.
 
I try not to get to vomitting or any of that. It's just not.....well fun...

I pace my drinking so I stay buzzed/drunk, but I don't cross the line like I used to.
 
Lathentar said:
If you drink fast enough, even if you stop you can feel completely sober then over the course of an hour it will all start to hit you and you can get to vomit stage.
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Haha, yeah. I got wasted one night after this chick I was supposed to have over to fuck the shit out of ended up backing out. I was so pissed I just started CHUGGING this beer reserved for both of us. I chugged 5 beers in 12 minutes, and hit 14 beers chugged in 40 minutes. I was only moderately drunk for another 10 minutes, then it hit me. I could barely even walk.... struggled to the bathroom, puked, and went to bed. The chicks that saw it were like "holy shit, that is the coolest example of drinking ability i've ever seen!" and my roommate was like "that was the most amazing hour of drinking i've ever seen." Heh.

But yeah.... if you take your time then you can always avoid puking when you stop at not being able to talk. But if you rush it, you're usually fucked.
 
I was just about to leave a party when friend arrived and started a game of black or red before I could my ride out the door. Some whining later and I'm sitting at the table. We were using some watered down everclear. Went a couple turns and only had maybe one or two shots, so I started going for triples and just had the worst luck imaginable, combined with getting doubled up on me a round or two and five minutes later I can't remember who I am. The next thing I remember about that night was waking up around 6, going to the bathroom and finding someone in it, not able to wake their ass up, and passing out in the backyard.
 
I've never been drunk and don't expect to be. I don't see what the appeal is; making an idiot of yourself? I already do that well enough on my own without alcoholic beverages, thank you. =PpP

I guess I'm a control freak when it comes to myself (if that makes any sense). :lol I don't like the idea of not being in control / not knowing what (or who?! ...) I did the night before.
 
Lathentar said:
Wait, so after you threw up in her mouth, you STILL got action?

How drunk was SHE!?
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Very.

Waychel: Getting drunk isn't the fun part, getting and maintaing a buzz is -- especially when you're with good company. That said, the line between a good buzz and drunk can be quickly shattered with one drink too many or underestimating how much alcohol you've taken in. You're still young, and I imagine you'll see the appeal of a casual drink or two in the future. Those times I've wanted to go get trashed, it has nothing to do with people, and everything to do with having a really bad or disappointing event, and wanting to lose myself.
 
i cant remember the drunkest ive ever been, thats the problem. luckily ive only blacked out maybe 3-4 times in my life.

Macam said:
Only his girlfriend's friend was taking a shower, so we showered together, proceeded to make out, I threw up in her mouth, and we then afterwards proceeded to put on a public show for a few hours until we passed out.
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um... ew?


Leon said:
I set the limit at not being able to walk straight. Getting to the vomiting threshold is just plain, consummate stupidity.
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then you obviously dont know how to get drunk.
 
Sad story. The first time I got drunk (really drunk) I didn't know my limits. Me and my roomates were having at a bottle of Vodka (can't remember the brand)

About one hour into the night I am so toasted that I start chugging straight from the bottle.

About one hour after that I was so messed up that I had to hurl and shit at the same time. I run into the bathroom, and in my blitzed state I couldn't figure that my best bet would be puking into the tub while I sat on the dumper. Instead, I threw up all over the bathroom wall while I sat on the toilet, and then passed out for the rest of the night. My (female) roomate woke me up the next morning as I sat with my pants still around my ankles. It was bad (but they were understanding)

These days I have the stomach and stamina of a Russian sailor, but I most certainly payed my dues.
 
Waychel said:
I've never been drunk and don't expect to be. I don't see what the appeal is; making an idiot of yourself? I already do that well enough on my own without alcoholic beverages, thank you. =PpP
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If you found yourself a tasty wine, and got a bottle and some friends did the same and drank it while listening to music and chatting, you would probably discover what others find the appeal to be, whether you enjoyed it would be up to you I guess.
 
Flamingshot.gif


I know when I've had too much to drink when I'm sobbing into my drink for absolutely no reason, then having to stay motionless on the bathroom floor until the sun sets.
 
A couple of years ago I emptied two bottles of Vodka-class beverages (local stuff, same amount of alcohol as Vodka) with a friend in aprox. 1 1/2 hour. Then we proceeded to midly trash his appartment, went to the park, and thought it would be a great idea to smoke weed. After that, I couldn't really stand straight and my friend stumbled into a canal. He spend a good half hour hanging in the water. We only got home because we met some friends in town that escorted us back to his home. My hang-over took two days to go away and I've had so much alcohol since then.

Funnier story: some time ago me and some friends saw a tramp urinate on one of our bikes. He was kinda wasted but started yelling and cursing so we pushed him into a city canal, then urinated on him. But, we were responsible after all, made sure he didn't drown, left the scene after he crawled out :D.
 
I was at a friend's party...well, a friend of a friend's party. I decided to drink pretty heavily as everyone else knew each other so I needed to be as sociable as possible.

I may have gone a bit too far. As ermm...I passed out within 3 hours of starting drinking. I don't remember the last hour though. Well I do remember bits of it, though it's hilariously twisted. For example, I remember pointing to this girl's logo on her top and asking what it meant. Everyone else remembers me groping this girl (who had a boyfriend, not at the party thank god) right in front of everyone, full on handfuls. Also, I remember apologising to the girl whose party it was for ruining her party on my knees as I couldn't stand while she was on the sofa in front of me. What apparently was actually happening was me apologising to my friend (a guy) over and over again while he was making sure I didn't spew anywhere but in the toilet that was in front of me. Woke up about 3 in the morning in some bed I'd never seen before, completely lost and still drunk, having to text my friend to ask what was going on.

I don't remember what I drank. Anything and everything. I've passed out other times too, but never that quick, so this one wins.
 
Drozmight said:
and you lived?
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A friend of mine in college had .45 once, how he lived is a good question. Some of our buddies took him to the hospital and had his stomach pumped. Biggest drinker I ever knew, and he was not a big guy, maybe 5 ft, 5in, 140 pounds, not an ounce of fat, but damn, he drank like a fish, he was just out of control.

It seemed funny at the time, but it wasn't really.
 
To start with i don't condone drunk driving and don't think it's a laughing matter, in fact after this particular instance i haven't drove a car "assfaced drunk" again.

Anyways, this isn't the drunkest i've ever been but it was certainly one of the most confused drunk times i've ever had lol. It was for a friends b-day either 5-6 years ago and we all decided to meet at this bar around 8 pm to really take advantage of the dollar "you call its" that happened to fall on his b-day. Everyone gets shitfaced and around 1:30 or so i decide to leave. I'm walking out to the parking lot and i see what i think is my car (nissan sentra) and proceed to try to get in and drive home. Well the key doesn't fit and i sit there for what was probably 5+ minutes wondering what the f'ck is going on amd continuing to try the key. Then it dawns on me when i see a purse in the passenger seat that it's not my car. I look up and see my car one aisle over lol. Don't remember anything after that, all i know is that i drove home. I woke up the next morning with my car in the driveway, me sleeping in the drivers seat, and the car still running heh.
 
I've never been a big drinker, but the only really memorable drunken moment I had was in high school when me and a buddy raided his parent's liquor cabinet and had at a bottle of vodka. I recall discussing the finer points of Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers re-reuns, pissing all over his bathroom in a pathetic attempt at aiming for his toilet, backing into his ditch on the way out of his house, and then sliding my car car into a muddy embankment while trying to take a corner to fast on my way home. Thankfully I didn't do any permanent damage to anyone else or my ride. I was laughing pretty hard when I got out of my car only to see almost exactly one half of it totally coated in mud. I quickly sprayed that off with a water hose, plopped down in my bed, and proceeded to sleep for about a day. An interesting experience, although not one I'd necessarily care to repeat.
 
Lets see when I was 18, which was about 12 yrs ago. I used to drink Jack right out of the bottle. Not the huge bottles, but the $8 flasks. People know what that is. Anyway, I drank that whole bottle like it was water. I was chugging it, I was taking huge gulps, ect. Anyway, I got so drunk, I passed out in the back seat of my car while all my friendswere outside partying and laughing and whatnot. Finally when I got home, I was in my bed still drunk off my ass, I guess I still thought I was in my car, and I was hitting my bedboard looking for my car door handle, and when I couldnt find it, I gave up and threw up in my bed. It was not fun. I had to get up, take my sheets off, go and wash them, all while I was drunk. It was not cool. Since that day, I cant even smell Jack without getting sick.

PS. I have a funny story that involved John Tv and Firewater, but I will let him decide if he wants to tell it.
 
In college after a whole lotta doubles of Blackjack with a sweating longneck on the side I walked into a frat house full of people I hated, pissed in the middle of their floor and yelled "Bring the fucking noise." Apparently. As I don't remember it, but my boys with me do.
 
Waychel said:
I've never been drunk and don't expect to be. I don't see what the appeal is; making an idiot of yourself? I already do that well enough on my own without alcoholic beverages, thank you. =PpP
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Drinking to get drunk is kind of dumb...but as already noted, drinking moderately enough to get a good buzz is a lot of fun. If you ever want to experiment with drinking, start slowly, give your body time to adjust, and do it with people you know well. I think that experience might change your mind a bit. :)

I think I've already shared some of my drinking experiences before, but here's one I might not have mentioned. I went with a couple of friends to a Halloween party some years ago, and I had brought a six-pack of beer and a 375 mL bottle of Southern Comfort with me. (I normally HATE Southern Comfort, but a buddy of mine had talked me into buying one of the smaller bottles since he was getting one too.) In typical dumbass fashion, I had eaten a light dinner, so I had a strong buzz going after knocking back a couple of beers.

One of my friends -- the Southern Comfort guy -- had played football for our high school, and we ran into some ex-players from our rival school at the party who recognized him. Trash-talking ensued, complete with jockeying for position over the two or three really good-looking girls at the party that we had been chatting up, but things were still pretty cordial...at least, until one of them called us "pussy drinkers." (Slight aside: Someone needs to do some research into teenage psychology, since guys of a certain age will literally do ANYTHING if you call them a pussy. If we ever need soldiers to fight Unnecessary War of American Conquest #whatever, all you have to do is hand out machine guns to the local high school and call them all pussies. But anyway...back to the story.) My friend and I shot each other a look, took out the bottles of Southern Comfort, and proceeded to drink the ENTIRE BOTTLE in one chug.

Well, that shut up the next-town-over jock contingent, and we proceeded with our mission of talking the costumes off the girls. Sadly, about 30 minutes after that, I had crossed over from drunken eloquence to being downright sloppy, and that was that. Remember, guys -- if you're too drunk to seal the deal, YOU'RE TOO DRUNK, PERIOD. I wish someone could have carried around a poster with that message when I was in my early 20s...sheesh.

(By the way -- Macam, you are the MAN. That's one hell of a story.)
 
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