Season four of Star Wars: The Clone Wars begins with everyone’s favorite thing: politics! You see,
episode 67 takes place on Mon Calamari, and it gets convoluted right off the bat. The Mon Calamari people (yes, that’s the name of the people, too, and of the entire star system, for that matter) have a murdered king on their hands and a whole lot of civil unrest because the next in line is Prince Lee-Char (the yellow guy), who’s just a kid. The Quarren (the squid-looking ones) do not support the idea of another Mon Calamari king, let alone a king so young, and want to crown one of their own as ruler of the planet. Both of the major forces in the galaxy are here to observe this conflict: the Republic, in the form of Anakin and Padme in silly diving suits, and the Separatists, the shark guy who looks like a fishman from One Piece (I’m gonna call him “Gran Bruce.”
Also along for the ride because everybody has to know everybody is Mr. “It’s a Trap!” himself, Admiral Ackbar! He’s just a captain at this point, though. He explains on a call to the Jedi Council that civil war is inevitable, and the Council promises to sound some clones, Ahsoka, and Kit Fisto (hehe) for backup.
Later, in one of the clunkiest exposition dumps I’ve ever seen, a Mon Calamari senator tells Ackbar that he is now the personal guard for Lee-Char, who is in charge of the entire army for some reason. Then the following happens, verbatim:
Lee-Char gives a speech about finding a peaceful solution and concludes with, “I do not believe the Quarren will attack.”
Gran Bruce, the Quarren, and some underwater droids swim to the city. Gran Bruce shouts, “Attack!”
Ackbar and Lee-Char swim up to a window. Ackbar says, “It’s an attack!”
Anyway, this culminates in some of the largest battle scenes on the show so far. Their scale is impressive, with lasers firing everywhere and hordes of people on each side. Lee-Char eventually appears on the battlefield next to Anakin and Padme. Ackbar defers command to the prince, a decision that Anakin protests; he insists that the kid needs to be taken somewhere safe, but Ackbar chooses to adhere to tradition and says the prince is the only one allowed to make such decisions. Then this verbal conflict just kinda…sputters out. Ackbar leaves to lead the troops, while Anakin and Padme hang out with Lee-Char, who is still determined to take part in the battle. He decides that the best decision is to flank the enemy, leading Anakin, Padme, and three or four redshirts through one of the tubes used to traverse the massive underwater city. Debris falls on the tube and kills the redshirts. I’m not sure what the point of this scene is supposed to illustrate.
Soon, Ahsoka, and Kit Fisto (hehe) arrive with clone reinforcements to add even more numbers to the already massive battle. We get some shots of various characters shooting stuff and riding around on what can best be described as underwater jet skis, while Gran Bruce swims around doing shark things to attack his enemies and the Lee-Char mopes about being useless. Anakin loses his helmet in one scene and has to fight off the Quarren as Ahsoka retrieves it before she goes off to help the prince. Gran Bruce comes after Lee-Char and does more shark things like smash his head repeatedly against the glass tubes until they break, but some Mon Calamari troops manage to distract him (and die) long enough for Ahsoka and the prince to escape. When Gran Bruce swims around attacking people, he grunts and shouts, which is kind of hilarious because his voice really doesn’t seem to fit a scary shark man. This is a guy you expect to sound like Keith David or something, and even though Gran Bruce’s voice isn’t high it’s not as deep as it probably should be.
Night falls and the Quarren retreat. Gran Bruce reveals his secret weapon, something no water dwellers would ever expect or be able to fight against: jellyfish. Yes, they’re technically bio-mechanical hybrids and absolutely massive, but still. The Republic troops and the Mon Calamari prove to be able to defend against the jellyfish as the Separatists droids renew their attack. Well, all except Kit Fisto (hehe), who manages to destroy one by crashing a jet ski into it and does this really fucking creepy smile. Aware that they’re outmatched, Lee-Char orders everyone to just keep swimming the hell away from those jellyfish and to retreat into a cave system. In the aftermath, the Quarren finally arrive, quite late to the party. It appears their leader is having some second thoughts. We cut to Ackbar spouting some lesson about living to fight another day before the credits roll.
The battles here are undeniably impressive, but there isn't much of a story to tie things together. Clone Wars's method of throwing you in the middle of action has really hurt things here; it's hard to care at all about the prince or his leadership problems because we haven't gotten to know him. The episode works as a showcase for underwater battles, but that's about it. And even then it's a gimmick that wears a little thin by the end.
Grade:
B-