Virgin territory: Why the Japanese are turning their backs on sex

CyberPanda

CyberPanda

Banned
Young people in Japan – particularly men – are shunning physical love, and they're not the only ones

The University of Tokyo's latest study of Japan's "virginity crisis" focuses on financial, regional and generational data. No surprise: the majority of the population's sexless men (one in four young adults, as of 2015) are not gainfully employed. They're either jobless or work part-time and live in smaller cities or suburban/rural areas.

What is striking is the comparatively high number of young adult Japanese who, well into their 30s, have had some sex but gave it up, and now have no interest in finding an intimate partner at all. Dr Peter Ueda, one of the study's co-authors (and, like me, a "hafu": half-Japanese), tells me that this is where cultural norms may be at play. Matchmaking (omiai) persisted in Japan through the boom years of the 1980s, when the task shifted from village elders to corporate managers. In the 21st century, modernisation, westernisation, and the collapse of Japan's economic "bubble" made arranged coupling superfluous.

"[Japanese] society is not as eager to get you married any more," Ueda says. "It's increasingly your own responsibility to fend for yourself in the mating market."

Japan is famously communal; wa, group harmony, is prioritised. Standing out by fending for yourself can be risky business – like posting unpopular words or pictures on Twitter and Instagram. Public physical displays of affection have long been frowned upon. (No one in my Japanese family has ever hugged me.) Handholding happens, but isn't commonplace. Dating back to Japan's first contact with westerners, the handshake remains an alien form of greeting: unhygienic, weird, reserved for foreigners. Bow and keep your distance. Even saying "I love you" in Japanese (aishiteru) is virtually verboten, uttered mainly as a joke (safest to say suki: "I like you … a lot").

All of which may still make Japan the perfect storm of our sexless futures, where physical contact and face-to-face intimacy are fluttering to the ground like so many cherry petals.
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"[Japanese] society is not as eager to get you married any more," Ueda says. "It's increasingly your own responsibility to fend for yourself in the mating market."
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In the mating market. We cats now fam! So Japan wants to vanish from earth? Yes I never understood the obsession over sex but still it's something necessary in life. Personally I would like to have kids that carries my name after I die. Isn't this how the world supposed to be? I mean yeah it's up to you if you want kids or not but I always believed that it's a gift from god. I'm sure GafParents can tell us more about the matter and how it feels
 
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Mista said:
In the mating market. We cats now fam! So Japan wants to vanish from earth? Yes I never understood the obsession over sex but still it's something necessary in life. Personally I would like to have kids that carries my name after I die. Isn't this how the world supposed to be? I mean yeah it's up to you if you want kids or not but I always believed that it's a gift from god. I'm sure GafParents can tell us more about the matter and how it feels
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Capitalism is working them to death. No one has time to start up a family, and with Japan's good work ethics, they will work till their very last breath.
 
CurryPanda said:
Capitalism is working them to death. No one has time to start up a family, and with Japan's good work ethics, they will work till their very last breath.
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More like lack of strong economical bond that tied families together.

People didn't just marry because they loved each other. They mostly married because it was easier to live as two rather than one and when you get old you had kids to care for you.

Right now you can live alone and you have nanny state that will hand out you pension once you retire.
So what is the point of family now ? Just emotional. But emotions pale in comparison with money.

This stuff isn't exclusive to japanese. This stuff also came to modern western societies and it is increasing problem.
Japan was first because their standard of live was just better than rest earlier.
 
Japan has the best entertainment variety in the world, which makes being single much easier than anywhere else. This will be the destruction of their land too.
 
Cunth said:
Japan have shops where you can get a cubicle just to watch porn. They have evolved
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Are these aimed at the married man with no free space at home or the blue balls among us who just can't wait to get home?

Never mind, I realised it's for all, I agree. They have evolved. They should erect them here.
 
Or why can't other people be more like us hyper sexualized Westerners - we want to sell sex and sexy everywhere from cornflakes to kids movies to sexy iPhones. Sex and sexuality should be everywhere, and we should all be fucking like rabbits using Tinder and hook up apps. When humans have actually controlled themselves and do things they enjoy how the fuck can we sell them more useless shit? How can they can be successful and have that hot boyfriend just buy this lipstick, or get the girl buy this sports car!
Its so sad to see a country like Japan that could be fucking and promoting slut walks :( How dare they respect the family unit - what a bunch of anti-sluts they are.
 
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Panda1 said:
Or why can't other people be more like us hyper sexualized Westerners - we want to sell sex and sexy everywhere from cornflakes to kids movies to sexy iPhones. Sex and sexuality should be everywhere, and we should all be fucking like rabbits using Tinder and hook up apps. When humans have actually controlled themselves and do things they enjoy how the fuck can we sell them more useless shit? How can they can be successful and have that hot boyfriend just buy this lipstick, or get the girl buy this sports car!
Its so sad to see a country like Japan that could be fucking and promoting slut walks :( How dare they respect the family unit - what a bunch of anti-sluts they are.
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Given that Japan is facing a serious population decline, I don't think we should revere its "no sex, please" attitude. Especially when it's combined with the country's neuroses about many things, including workaholism.

It's fascinating, really. So many socially conservative Westerners fetishize Japan as a role model while conveniently forgetting that the country is slowly choking itself to death.
 
Aurelian said:
It's fascinating, really. So many socially conservative Westerners fetishize Japan as a role model while conveniently forgetting that the country is slowly choking itself to death.
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I feel I'm more conservative with my views on sex and see things being way too sexualized here in NA. That said, I don't envy Japan and the direction they are headed seems worrisome. For me, I felt I just wasn't responsible enough to be in any sort of sexual relationship and need to get things in my head sorted first. Honestly, some of this Japanese issue has likely rubbed off on my via anime and videogames.
 
It is disheartening, but it is nothing that can't be changed. Demographic shift can and has been changed in the period of even 2 years. All it takes is a strong government that will support the existence of family.
 
This is happening in lots of places and is a reflection of changing times / increasing affluence. Part of it is people don't see a rush, or straight up enjoy their hobbies more. Panic is coming more because public service / taxation systems of the 20th century were built on the assumption that they would be unending ponzi schemes. Situations like this I could see being a major catalyst for increased corporate taxation as governments may not have the numbers in the general population to have a big enough tax base to draw meaningful revenue from. Even if said Western countries ratchet up immigration to plug holes, that just siphons people out of other countries, and those places will have to deal with the budget shortfalls / instability instead.
 
-Minsc- said:
I feel I'm more conservative with my views on sex and see things being way too sexualized here in NA. That said, I don't envy Japan and the direction they are headed seems worrisome. For me, I felt I just wasn't responsible enough to be in any sort of sexual relationship and need to get things in my head sorted first. Honestly, some of this Japanese issue has likely rubbed off on my via anime and videogames.
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I look at it this way: sometimes the sexualization can be a bit much, but I'd much rather we be open with something that's a very natural part of life than pretend it doesn't exist. The funny thing is that Europeans frequently consider North America to be stuffy since it's not unheard of to see nudity in their media beyond porn and the occasional movie.
 
Noboru Wataya said:
Are these aimed at the married man with no free space at home or the blue balls among us who just can't wait to get home?

Never mind, I realised it's for all, I agree. They have evolved. They should erect them here.
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You mean porn booths?

Not as prevalent anymore in the US, at least in NYC they changed a code which prevents sex shops a distance away from residential. Also, the internet changed things.

But they do still exist, I've been in them before. I used to buy videos before the internet. Would not recommend booths. When someone leaves a booth, the store worker follows in with a mop that he just leaves sitting in a corner. ewgh. Must be a strange job.

You may be surprised at the varying walks of life sneaking out of those stores. From bums to business suits.
 
Honestly, I do not blame them. It is easier to be more productive and it requires less effort than pursuing sex. There are way less risks involved in every way. Plus there is so much entertainment and self indulgence in their society that it is easier to seek pleasure from those forms than it is from working towards sex.

I applaud he Japanese and these ways. I would like to proceed more like this in my future.
 
In a couple years japan will pass a law where men will get a license to fuck any women they want to produce children and the women will happily do it. I have seen hentai with that premise, lmao. xD
 
It is a choice. Escorts are cheaper than buying anime dvd's. 2D>3D?
 
Why is the focus only on Japan when ti comes to this? Is this quite a wide-spread issue in many Western Countries as well that is only not as visable due to them being more culturally diverse?
 
infinitys_7th said:
Too much shrill shrieking for me. It is as obnoxiously distracting as women's tennis grunts.
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Too much poop and fish for me.

Whataburger said:
It is a choice. Escorts are cheaper than buying anime dvd's. 2D>3D?
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>jacking off to sd cartoon porn in current year
71664241
 
Why can't you just take that as a joke there Trunks?

Your masturbation jokes makes me feel very uncomfortable.
738933.jpg

^Like this
 
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CurryPanda said:
Capitalism is working them to death. No one has time to start up a family, and with Japan's good work ethics, they will work till their very last breath.
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Thats not what is happening at all, but hey, its all the vogue for losers to decry capitalism at every chance they get.
 
I can see why, all cooped up on a relatively small island, I suspect I'd want to be furthest away from everyone too.
Personally I think it's probably best for society. We have so many people, in my experience anyway, that over reproduce, often on the premise that the govt will take care of them with welfare support. These people contribute nothing other than poorly raised children who tend to follow in their parents ambitions (none).
If people want to enjoy their life and not marry, have children.. Want to just enjoy their lives and do what they like so be it. As long as their choices don't impact me or their choices don't demand I take care of them when their sick /old then why the hell would I complain about how they live their lives
 
cryptoadam said:
But why they have such hot women there.
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I don't think the problems of sex and birthrates in Japan are necessarily related with how "hot" (note: there are many attractive young japanese ladies, I just put hot in quotation marks simply because I feel simple physical attraction isn't the cause here) the women are. It is more likely that the culture itself and social expectations are at blame here. For example, I understand the Japanese generally have a very strong work ethic, and having a family may get in the way of that. Also, how do they treat sex in media and social situations, are they rather liberal or conservative in that? I would imagine it differs from location to location. What exactly is valued in a romantic relationship or marriage in Japan? Does social media have an impact? I think these are better questions to ask here.
 
Working too hard so too tired/broken from long hours at work to pursue 'romantic' relationships.

Children are expensive in a society where rent/housing is extraordinarily expensive so having children isn't a priority.

The best computer games and easy access to porn.

Tenga flip hole feels real good and robot sex slaves are on the way so why not just save your money and wait for them.

Get a dog or cat for companionship.

Pay people to hug you when physical contact required.

Japan.
 
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Are they exclusively conflating relationships with sex? I ask because the prostitution industry in Japan is HUUUUGE. No need for a regular sex partner when Kimiko round the corner will service 200 guys a week.
 
CurryPanda said:
Capitalism is working them to death. No one has time to start up a family, and with Japan's good work ethics, they will work till their very last breath.
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That's not it, that shit is cultural. Mexicans work a very similar amount of hours per week and have no issues with going out to have fun, have relationships and so on.
 
What's the other side of the coin here? What happens to the women? They shrug it off? Date/marry older Japanese men? Date foreigners? Kill themselves?
 
Why would I want to maintain a relationship? Pay for a bunch of shit I don't need? Compromise?

I have all the porn I need to satisfy my sexual needs. I don't think every one needs to have a relationship to feel fulfilled.
 
Japan has birthrate of 1.44 and practically no foreigners that artificially improve the birthrate.
Italy & Spain 1.34...


So really.. birthrates among some european countries are far worse, They will die out long before the japanese. I imagine they have less sex too.
 
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