Fugitive Sex
Member
A lot of it has to do with a lack of community and having a socially retarded culture (if applicable).
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We live like Kings, but why are so many people depressed?
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synchronicity
Member
As the Buddha said, "Desire is the root of all suffering."
But to desire not to desire is also, paradoxically, a desire. Peace comes from total acceptance, from surrendering to what *is* and truly allowing all to be - the mind and its noise along with external circumstance. When there is a distancing from what happens, a recognition that things happen to you rather than *by* you, that you are not the architect of what you perceive to be "your" life, there is a space for peace in that condition, as the music of the universe/god plays and you observe the notes as the silent watcher.
lastmessiah
Member
The human being is a paradox. We can't live with our consciousness, and we can't live without it. The more progress is made and the more comfortable we are, the more this becomes apparent. The only "solution" seems to be some kind of artificial limitation of technological progress so that we can live like hunter-gatherers, but even then it would only last so long. And if being a hunter-gatherer was so great, we would never be where we are now in the first place.
Think about it, what is the endgame for us? To keep reproducing and filling up the biosphere until we consume all the resources and then a catastrophic event finally wipes us out? It really makes no sense what we do, but what else is there to do? And all the while we are painfully aware of everything in a way that animals and other lifeforms aren't. Not good!
Think about it, what is the endgame for us? To keep reproducing and filling up the biosphere until we consume all the resources and then a catastrophic event finally wipes us out? It really makes no sense what we do, but what else is there to do? And all the while we are painfully aware of everything in a way that animals and other lifeforms aren't. Not good!
Aesius
Member
I think we are in an awkward middle stage of history right now. We are only a few hundred years removed from living agrarian lifestyles. The information age came about in our lifetimes. Hell, the human race is still coping with the industrial revolution. Everything is happening so fast but there's no real efforts to manage things or reign them in. It's all about production, consumption, and greed.
If humanity can manage to avoid wiping itself out, I think the future, but quite likely the distant future, will be utopian. But it's going to take a long, long time to get there. IMO the next big steps are the technology singularity and a post-scarcity civilization on Earth. Imagine if all physical needs are met instantly and with no effort or conflict, and all objective information is available instantly.
I think for humanity to truly progress, we need some sort of benevolent supersmart AI and extremely advanced technology that can truly render material forms of greed (hoarding of wealth, resources, and even knowledge) obsolete. Or we need a complete "reset" and to revert back to the stone age.
Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
We live like kings yet rule nothing.
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lastmessiah
Member
Yeah, I wish life were like Star Trek too, but I am more pessimistic than you about our ability to get there. And even then, " if all physical needs are met instantly and with no effort or conflict, and all objective information is available instantly" - well, then what would we do? It would just be more apparent how seemingly meaningless our existence is.
Second post nails it.
Vicetrailia
Banned
I think that it is because of competition, there is so much of it in every facet of your life, that you are never good enough. Nothing is ever good enough.
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TheMan
Member
Many people on this planet, especially if you look outside the US, actually live in pretty shitty conditions. In the US, for the average Joe, I agree with what most have said in that we tend to compare ourselves to those who have more and we want that. When we cant' have that, we feel shitty. This is of course compounded by social media where so many "influencers" only show the highlight reels of their lives. And in fact much of that highlight reel is a lie used to create an image, often to sell shit to kids. And thanks to phones and youth culture, social media seems to be where a lot of people spend most of their free time.
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I agree. Sometimes I take a step back and think wow am I lucky. I'm working from home, flexible hours, sitting and watching videos, playing games and getting paid, no one watching me if I'm working. I can take as many breaks, even go to the gym during work hours. If I knew this would be work years back I'd be thinking this person got it do good. Then when it comes to entertainment, there is a infinite amount of choice with videogames, movies and TV shows with a fraction of the cost. Of course there are people out there living pay check to pay check with very hard stressful jobs but there are many people who are in my position, perhaps don't have it all and are not super rich but comfortable enough to not have to worry about not affording food or a warm home.
StreetsofBeige
Gold Member
That depends on the person on what kind of "needs and wants max threshold" someone has.
Some people blow their money for instant gratification even if it means being broke with CC debt. Some people are cheap as fuck (like my parents) even though their house is worth $2M. Someone like me is somewhere in the middle where most stuff I buy is decent, but I'm still a cheap ass for many things and always look for deals like I'm Mom and Dad V2. Just not as bad. I have no problem shopping at Dollarama.
There's 3 toasters in front of you. Which one do you buy?
1. Low end $20 model.
2. Some Black & Decker $40 so-so model
3. One of those big fancy convection toaster ovens which looks like you can roast a chicken in it too. $100+
I got money. But I'll skew to the $40 model. Good enough. My parents would for sure go for the $20 one. But then there's some people who gun for the $100+ model.
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Dee Dah Dave
Member
Because we live largely artificial to how human nature is supposed to be. Sat in concrete boxes instead of out in the fresh air and having to do at least a little bit of real survival.
I bet you don’t find much depression if any among people like Eskimos or tribes people living in the jungle.
I bet you don’t find much depression if any among people like Eskimos or tribes people living in the jungle.
DragoonKain
Neighbours from Hell
We don’t know if people hundreds of years ago weren’t depressed, because depression wasn’t even a thing back then. Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t. If not, I suspect it’s because they had more pressing issues to deal with on a daily basis and didn’t have time to worry or get down in the dumps.
I’m sure in the very least they suffered from anxiety though.
I’m sure in the very least they suffered from anxiety though.
Pagusas
Elden Member
im not depressed but I am at a point in life where I feel “too” content if that makes sense?
i’ve achieved 95% of the goals i’ve set out to achieve in life, i’ve succeeded at all the major things I wanted to. My issue is i’m running out of big life goals and having to come up with new ones…. I fear the best parts of my life may have past me now; great memories, but i’m not sure what’s going to keep pushing me forward with all my conviction and energy. I worry without new goals i’m passionate about, i’ll just gradually fade away.
i’ve achieved 95% of the goals i’ve set out to achieve in life, i’ve succeeded at all the major things I wanted to. My issue is i’m running out of big life goals and having to come up with new ones…. I fear the best parts of my life may have past me now; great memories, but i’m not sure what’s going to keep pushing me forward with all my conviction and energy. I worry without new goals i’m passionate about, i’ll just gradually fade away.
Winter John
Member
Actually we do know people suffered from depression and all forms of mental illness because we have these things called books
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Platinumstorm
Member
I think a lot of it stems from work life balance.
I did my 9 hours of work today - I don't get a break, and I work through lunch [by choice], and I'm working through most of that 9 hours. I commute home for 35-45 minutes. I come home and I poop; maybe 30 minutes of decompressing. I then have to decide if I'm going to cook, clean, grocery shop, or exercise. I just finished exercising. It's now 9pm; I haven't eaten yet, I haven't prepared for tomorrow, and there's about an hour of time left.
Again, this is a question between cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, and exercising; I can't do all 4 of those every day, and I work less than the standard 40 hours per week. My patients that I know that are working 55-80 hours per week are not exercising, and a lot of them suffer with mental health issues; and I guess my experiences and frustrations with time, and what I observe in them is where I think the root of this comes from. We sure don't have an 8/8/8.
I make a good amount of money, better than the average family, in the "lower upper class", but even I struggle at times at building meaningful savings. My emergency funds have dropped significantly because of *gasp* emergency expenses. My mortgage is 38% of my income, even though I live in a townhome - it's beautiful, but it's still a townhome. [downside of expensive communities with recreational opportunities] I am sure this adds tons of stress to most people, even wealthier people.
I have essentially everything I want except 1-3 things that are out of my price territory, at least for now, so it's not about envy; it's about time.
I did my 9 hours of work today - I don't get a break, and I work through lunch [by choice], and I'm working through most of that 9 hours. I commute home for 35-45 minutes. I come home and I poop; maybe 30 minutes of decompressing. I then have to decide if I'm going to cook, clean, grocery shop, or exercise. I just finished exercising. It's now 9pm; I haven't eaten yet, I haven't prepared for tomorrow, and there's about an hour of time left.
Again, this is a question between cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, and exercising; I can't do all 4 of those every day, and I work less than the standard 40 hours per week. My patients that I know that are working 55-80 hours per week are not exercising, and a lot of them suffer with mental health issues; and I guess my experiences and frustrations with time, and what I observe in them is where I think the root of this comes from. We sure don't have an 8/8/8.
I make a good amount of money, better than the average family, in the "lower upper class", but even I struggle at times at building meaningful savings. My emergency funds have dropped significantly because of *gasp* emergency expenses. My mortgage is 38% of my income, even though I live in a townhome - it's beautiful, but it's still a townhome. [downside of expensive communities with recreational opportunities] I am sure this adds tons of stress to most people, even wealthier people.
I have essentially everything I want except 1-3 things that are out of my price territory, at least for now, so it's not about envy; it's about time.
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RoboFu
One of the green rats
Just to put into perspective how much we have advanced in such a short period of time. Up until about 200 years ago .. for thousands and thousands of years …. Most People had to shit outside in a hole. Yes there were outhouses but that was still just a private hole to shit in outside.
Now we shit indoors into a device with purified clean water .. cleaner that anyone ever could drink for centuries… and we are able to take picture of that shit and post it to a global forum for everyone to see.
Now we shit indoors into a device with purified clean water .. cleaner that anyone ever could drink for centuries… and we are able to take picture of that shit and post it to a global forum for everyone to see.
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nush
Member
Never buy entry level unless you need to, go for the mid range because entry level will break and you'll either buy another entry level or realize you are now spending more that the mid level would have cost you. High end? Your paying for the name and features you'll never likely use beyond the "Trying it out" period.
DeafTourette
Perpetually Offended
I often hear that people today live in luxury compared to people 150, 200, 400 years ago, etc — but why is it so hard to appreciate this luxury without making relative comparisons to only people around us today?
Even the bottom 20% in the US have luxuries that people 200 years ago couldn’t fathom…television, radio, cell phones, internet, cars, modern medicine, fast food, etc, etc.
Why is it so hard to really appreciate modern times knowing how so many people lived for thousands of years?
I find myself getting fixated on little things I don’t have compared to someone else, yet compared to the billions of people that came before me, I have lived like a King from birth.
Because no one alive NOW could have lived back then. No one alive NOW time travelled to back then. We KNOW it was different and bad, unless you were rich. Give us a time traveller from a century ago and put them HERE and yes, they'd be like "I live likes king in this era!"
We only live in the NOW and many aspects of modern life are toxic and detrimental to our mental health.
Depression isn't about logic. Especially clinical depression.
RoyalLaFlame
Banned
The society we built is not for everyone. Either you keep up, or you will be left behind. Overwork, underpaid, getting more and more expensive, woke culture, constant comparison, fucking TV and news. All of this is cancer.
The more people detach themselves from expectations and comparisons, the happier they will be. These two are the killers of joy.
The more people detach themselves from expectations and comparisons, the happier they will be. These two are the killers of joy.
Cyberpunkd
Member
This is golden. The entry level models of everything carry up the most margins for the manufacturer, you are literally giving them the most money. Always go for something a little bit better, it will break far less and last you way longer.
Lanrutcon
Member
Well, I don't live like a king. Not a king of ye olde land or a king of the modern era.
Am I living a grand life compared to a medieval peasant? Sure, but I don't live in medieval times. I live in the 2022. The fallacy of comparing my life now to one completely unrelated is pretty obvious. It's like saying everyone should be happy about their bodies because there's a kid in India who was born in 1830 without arms, legs and eyes.
So let's talk about the era we live in. We live in the information age. Never in the history of our species has the average man or woman had access to the level of information we have today. Never before have we been as aware of what our species is, our place in the universe, and how absolutely un-magical it is. We're not special. There is no soul. God was a necessary invention while we were hiding in our mud huts, but now we have guns. There is no Loch Ness Monster. All the UFOs stopped visiting when we high quality cameras rolled out to phones. We thought people were inherently good and then social media proved us wrong. We though access to information would confirm the best of mankind, and instead it showed us a lot of uncomfortable truths.
Depression is, imo, a very natural response to finding out you're not God's special snowflake and your lifespan isn't even long enough to merit displaying on any scale that matters. How you deal with the depression is up to you. Escapism, substance abuse, ignorance, etc. Pick your poison and truck on.
Am I living a grand life compared to a medieval peasant? Sure, but I don't live in medieval times. I live in the 2022. The fallacy of comparing my life now to one completely unrelated is pretty obvious. It's like saying everyone should be happy about their bodies because there's a kid in India who was born in 1830 without arms, legs and eyes.
So let's talk about the era we live in. We live in the information age. Never in the history of our species has the average man or woman had access to the level of information we have today. Never before have we been as aware of what our species is, our place in the universe, and how absolutely un-magical it is. We're not special. There is no soul. God was a necessary invention while we were hiding in our mud huts, but now we have guns. There is no Loch Ness Monster. All the UFOs stopped visiting when we high quality cameras rolled out to phones. We thought people were inherently good and then social media proved us wrong. We though access to information would confirm the best of mankind, and instead it showed us a lot of uncomfortable truths.
Depression is, imo, a very natural response to finding out you're not God's special snowflake and your lifespan isn't even long enough to merit displaying on any scale that matters. How you deal with the depression is up to you. Escapism, substance abuse, ignorance, etc. Pick your poison and truck on.
Scotty W
Banned
Well, we have to end apartheid for one.
And slow down the nuclear arms race, stop terrorism and world hunger.
We have to provide food and shelter for the homeless, and oppose racial discrimination and promote civil rights, while also promoting equal rights for women.
We have to encourage a return to traditional moral values.
Most importantly, we have to promote general social concern, and less materialism in young people.
And slow down the nuclear arms race, stop terrorism and world hunger.
We have to provide food and shelter for the homeless, and oppose racial discrimination and promote civil rights, while also promoting equal rights for women.
We have to encourage a return to traditional moral values.
Most importantly, we have to promote general social concern, and less materialism in young people.
nush
Member
Tough one there when you are older and have more things. "Hey kid, you don't actually need all the shit I've got".
Scotty W
Banned
p_xavier
Authorized Fister
Mine was actually $400. I travelled the World in First Class, got a great forever home, got great friends, and got money. Am I happy? Absolutely not, but buying what I consider the best toaster made me calm for a few minutes due to seratonin.
nush
Member
Spaceman292
Banned
Material things don't stop you from being depressed. Also I'm pretty sure people were just as depressed a hundred years ago. Do you think all those amputee kids in victorian workhouses were just grateful for what they had?I often hear that people today live in luxury compared to people 150, 200, 400 years ago, etc — but why is it so hard to appreciate this luxury without making relative comparisons to only people around us today?
Even the bottom 20% in the US have luxuries that people 200 years ago couldn’t fathom…television, radio, cell phones, internet, cars, modern medicine, fast food, etc, etc.
Why is it so hard to really appreciate modern times knowing how so many people lived for thousands of years?
I find myself getting fixated on little things I don’t have compared to someone else, yet compared to the billions of people that came before me, I have lived like a King from birth.
p_xavier
Authorized Fister
It's all relative. When you buy something of quality, even if its tons more, it lasts a lifetime.Check out Mr Moneybucks here.
Punished Miku
Banned
Economics. Most people actually stabilize in terms of gains to their happiness after they have their needs met. Studies have found that is around $75k-100k in 2010, so that has definitely gone up a bit recently. After you can buy a house, afford to get married, have a kid (or multiple), take a 1 vacation a year, plan for retirement, have health care, buy a house and car, the rest is really just frivolous icing on the cake for the most part. Far too many people will never be able to achieve these basic elements of living outside of poverty.
Social media / internet. Watch some documentaries on this, and modern media - the ad driven model. Almost all of our media is selling outrage and divisiveness for profit.
Game of Thrones Season 8. Have you seen this ending? I'm still not over it honestly.
Social media / internet. Watch some documentaries on this, and modern media - the ad driven model. Almost all of our media is selling outrage and divisiveness for profit.
Game of Thrones Season 8. Have you seen this ending? I'm still not over it honestly.
Dr.Morris79
Gold Member
I know what makes me depressed. I've never been in it for money, I just dont care for it and couldnt really care what others do with their life either, i've zero interest. But having to basically live 42 years in servitude due to having a family that has quite a few health problems it's getting to me that by the time I have any sort of freedom i'll be too old and knackered myself to enjoy it
i just want to do a boat up on a beach, it's depressing to me me to know that'll never happen
I dont want anything from this life truth be told, never really have and the things i've seen over the course of mine I dont really care for it much anymore.
Just want my beach/boat combo
i just want to do a boat up on a beach, it's depressing to me me to know that'll never happen
I dont want anything from this life truth be told, never really have and the things i've seen over the course of mine I dont really care for it much anymore.
Just want my beach/boat combo
Soodanim
Gold Member
It's all in the wrist
Member
Get in control of your destiny, and take care of others along the way.
Alter_Fridge
Member
Being in ultra good shape
When I've been there, it's basically better than everything else
When I've been there, it's basically better than everything else
8bitpill
Member
Younger generation taking for granted what they have. What others have said and posted about on this thread "the grass is always greener", social media and comparing themselves to others and what others have, and do with their lives.
Making depression a trendy label has spread like wild fire and dulls down people who are clinically depressed.
Not being thankful for the things they have, and focus on the things they don't have.
The list goes on. The focus should be, thankful for what you have, works towards what you want/need. Luxury items come last, health comes first, little steps towards your goals.
Maybe the simple answer is: Because chasing money and luxury goods doesn't actually make you happy.
Even though we're all very much conditioned to (if not even born with) the notion this is sort of the most important thing in life, and getting more stuff will somehow make you a happier person.
As for the things that I think truly matter for long-term happiness; not all of those have improved.
Medicine/healthcare certainly has! But let's face it, many of us are lucky enough to take good health for granted, we'd only ever notice it if it's not there anymore.
Other than that - community, family, and friends. I think that is truly important. And boy, do we all - our modern society, that is - suck at that! I'd argue social ties have become a LOT weaker than in the more distant past.
So we're left with a lot of "luxury improvements" that imho don't play any role whatsoever for happiness, and a bunch of truly important factors, not all of which have exactly improved throughout time.
Even though we're all very much conditioned to (if not even born with) the notion this is sort of the most important thing in life, and getting more stuff will somehow make you a happier person.
As for the things that I think truly matter for long-term happiness; not all of those have improved.
Medicine/healthcare certainly has! But let's face it, many of us are lucky enough to take good health for granted, we'd only ever notice it if it's not there anymore.
Other than that - community, family, and friends. I think that is truly important. And boy, do we all - our modern society, that is - suck at that! I'd argue social ties have become a LOT weaker than in the more distant past.
So we're left with a lot of "luxury improvements" that imho don't play any role whatsoever for happiness, and a bunch of truly important factors, not all of which have exactly improved throughout time.
Alter_Fridge
Member
For me, being bullied by my own so called friends when they weren't being nice to me was a big source of depression and feeling like shit
Parents arguing and screaming at each other when you're young and just wanting to be anywhere else doesn't help
Parents arguing and screaming at each other when you're young and just wanting to be anywhere else doesn't help
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lukilladog
Member
It is an evolutive behavior thing, very pronounced on primates. As for the idea that we should feel better because people had it worse in the past, it does not logically follow. Check Relative Privation Red Herring.
Ps. Buddah actually had a clue, respect.
Ps. Buddah actually had a clue, respect.
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EverydayBeast
ChatGPT 0.1
Men prove their manhood regardless of wealth.
Out of all first world countries, the US is one of the worst for quality of life. Healthcare, crime, no vacations, poor worker rights, lacking education ...good for the rich, maybe, but you couldn't pay me to live there.
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FullMetalx117
Member
I agree with the community aspect. My family immigrated here from Pakistan where family is a pillar of life even though it's a 3rd world country.
My grandmother had 10 kids and my aunts/uncles really made it a point to all see each other, make us spend lots of time with cousins where we felt like we all grew up like brothers/sisters. It never felt lonely, there was always something going on/something to talk about/people around to acknowledge you for your accomplishments. Now we have all become doctors/engineers and are too busy with rest of our lives to see each other. I keep trying to explain to my cousins why it's important to see other regularly and why it's a unique advantage not many in the country have; otherwise, we will become like most of my college friends who don't really have cousins nor a concept of an extended family seeing each other regularly. But many of my cousins are much more interested in being worldly and find it more exciting to meet new people/connections which I guess is fair (I would argue constantly jumping around like this may lead to you never making those true, deep, life long friends). Anyways, safe to say that the generation after my own probably will never know the joy of having a massive extended family. We're just all too busy these days
My grandmother had 10 kids and my aunts/uncles really made it a point to all see each other, make us spend lots of time with cousins where we felt like we all grew up like brothers/sisters. It never felt lonely, there was always something going on/something to talk about/people around to acknowledge you for your accomplishments. Now we have all become doctors/engineers and are too busy with rest of our lives to see each other. I keep trying to explain to my cousins why it's important to see other regularly and why it's a unique advantage not many in the country have; otherwise, we will become like most of my college friends who don't really have cousins nor a concept of an extended family seeing each other regularly. But many of my cousins are much more interested in being worldly and find it more exciting to meet new people/connections which I guess is fair (I would argue constantly jumping around like this may lead to you never making those true, deep, life long friends). Anyways, safe to say that the generation after my own probably will never know the joy of having a massive extended family. We're just all too busy these days
Alter_Fridge
Member
Everyone who does psychadelics reports ego death
Spaceman292
Banned
They aren't really your friends, man they're just using you for your toaster
synchronicity
Member
I've been down that road, and in my own experience, when the "self" is lost and all that is left is pure *being* without a point of reference, there is overwhelming bliss, you become that bliss. I imagine it's how it feels to be an infant before the ego has taken form, and there is just this profound gratitude and JOY at simply being. It's hard to articulate properly. All I can say is that I have found myself alternating between cathartic laughter and crying/sobbing in a state that is so unlike the normal waking state associated with life. Everything is so impossibly beautiful, but it can be difficult to see from the perspective of the self-interested and fearful mind, forever looking out for survival (avoiding dangers and seeking advantages based on past experience and future projection) and missing the moment, the *NOW*.
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