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What NOT to do at E3 FAQ
- Thread starter Milkman
- Start date
M3wThr33 said:
They were actually just straight hockey jerseys the one year.
We all quickly realized that hockey jerseys get kinda freaking warm in a stuffy crowded environment.
The next year we opted for light-weight bowling shirts. I still think those ones are pretty kick ass. Probably the only time I'll have anything with "Juice" embroidered on it.
EDIT: Oh, and I'm not going to put the video online. I don't want my server or the staffer's reputation sodomized anymore than they have to be.
Is it true that the place gets so congested with non press that it can be hard for you actual industry types to do your jobs ?
They should really split E3 onto a 4th day, you'd get a badge to look at wares on day 1 if you come from the US press, day 2 for european press , day 3 for asian press and day 4 for anyone else press or not.
I'd really like to go to it becuase you know, videogames breasts and kentia hall WOWOW and all that but I don't want to add to an allready too full venue if that really is the case.
They should really split E3 onto a 4th day, you'd get a badge to look at wares on day 1 if you come from the US press, day 2 for european press , day 3 for asian press and day 4 for anyone else press or not.
I'd really like to go to it becuase you know, videogames breasts and kentia hall WOWOW and all that but I don't want to add to an allready too full venue if that really is the case.
Pachinko said:
Yes. Especially at the Nintendo booth. ESPECIALLY AT THE NINTENDO BOOTH YOU FUCKING....nevermind. All I can say is that the Nintendo booth is usually a fucking firehazard for sure.
I actually wish, since they're making us go earlier and ealrier every year, is just let press do their thing, maybe Monday through Thursday, then open that shit to the public on Friday. That would teach the industry a lesson. Not like I can't write the same shit from a CD-ROM and PR visit like we normally do anyway. Lord I loathe this month (May) of the year.
Pachinko said:
I think they should just be stricter on what they consider "press." The screening process for fansites (and even fansites that just exist so people can get into E3) is pretty ridiculous. If you have a valid driver's license and are 18 you seem to just get the nod. Then again, if you work at a freaking gamestore or compusa, you can usually squirm your way in. The show needs to either take place in an even bigger venue (if one exists) or just be way more restrictive in attendee screening.
Or yeah, 1 day that's only open to industry workers and "real" press.
On tchotchkes:
1) Do not embarrass yourself for a bauble. People are right to point and laugh when you hover anxiously around a booth waiting for the receptionist to put out the special pens or pins or rubber balls.
2) Do not hurt your fellow man in the attempt to snag a free T-shirt. Game companies understand you are a stone fatty, and only throw out small-sized shirts knowing you will proudly wear it anyway. Simply, it's not worth the bad karma you'd accumulate trampling over others to get an ill-fitting piece of clothing, even it does have your girlfriend Lara Croft on it.
On simple human decency:
1) The aisles are where people walk. You would do well not to stand in them, blocking traffic.
2) Shower. Wash your hands after you eat and before you're going to touch the consoles.
3) Listen. When you're at the press conference and they tell you the new Tomb Raider, for example, is exclusive to PlayStation 2, don't be a complete and utter retard and raise your hand and ask (in succession) when the game is coming out for Xbox and then the GameCube.
Miscellaneous:
1) Don't go into the media center and claim that your site Gamecrab.com needs 20 press passes.
2) Do go into Kentia Hall and taste the rainbow of fruit flavors.
3) Do randomly yell, "This one is for you, William Howard Taft!"
4) Don't creep us all out by blatantly taking digital pictures of the booth babes' asses, or attempt to get panty shots by lowering your camera and pointing upward. We know what you are doing, the booth babes know what you are doing, and the PR people who have to attend to the babes know what you are doing. Especially when the model in question has her back turned (or is bending over) and the flashes are going.
1) Do not embarrass yourself for a bauble. People are right to point and laugh when you hover anxiously around a booth waiting for the receptionist to put out the special pens or pins or rubber balls.
2) Do not hurt your fellow man in the attempt to snag a free T-shirt. Game companies understand you are a stone fatty, and only throw out small-sized shirts knowing you will proudly wear it anyway. Simply, it's not worth the bad karma you'd accumulate trampling over others to get an ill-fitting piece of clothing, even it does have your girlfriend Lara Croft on it.
On simple human decency:
1) The aisles are where people walk. You would do well not to stand in them, blocking traffic.
2) Shower. Wash your hands after you eat and before you're going to touch the consoles.
3) Listen. When you're at the press conference and they tell you the new Tomb Raider, for example, is exclusive to PlayStation 2, don't be a complete and utter retard and raise your hand and ask (in succession) when the game is coming out for Xbox and then the GameCube.
Miscellaneous:
1) Don't go into the media center and claim that your site Gamecrab.com needs 20 press passes.
2) Do go into Kentia Hall and taste the rainbow of fruit flavors.
3) Do randomly yell, "This one is for you, William Howard Taft!"
4) Don't creep us all out by blatantly taking digital pictures of the booth babes' asses, or attempt to get panty shots by lowering your camera and pointing upward. We know what you are doing, the booth babes know what you are doing, and the PR people who have to attend to the babes know what you are doing. Especially when the model in question has her back turned (or is bending over) and the flashes are going.
Booth 2240, Australian Games
Open Source
Banned
E3 isn't there just for the press. In fact, its main purpose is for the publisher suits to hook up with the retailer suits.
Plus, the gaming press at E3 is a bunch of amateurs who could never get a real writing job, for the most part. Anything that makes their heads bigger, I am against. For people who have trouble with basic spelling and grammar, they have rather large egos.
Present company excepted, of course.
Plus, the gaming press at E3 is a bunch of amateurs who could never get a real writing job, for the most part. Anything that makes their heads bigger, I am against. For people who have trouble with basic spelling and grammar, they have rather large egos.
Present company excepted, of course.
Open Source said:
Personally, I never really wanted a "real" writing job, so you can put your assumptions about the people who work in this industry right back in your ass. Message board posters, present company exclusded of course, are usually a bunch of passive-aggressive amateurs who could never get a gaming writing job, for the most part. The main purpose of E3 is actually to achieve multiple things in one major media swoop. A) Bring attention to the medium by providing spectacle, B) corral developers and enthusiast and consumer media together for a major information-swap, c) offer an additional forum for retailer interaction, even though most retailers have their own independent gatherings for that (Electronics Boutiques annual Florida get together, for example). Nice try at a blanket definition of why E3 exists though.
JackFrost2012
Banned
You left out drinking!
Open Source
Banned
Milkman said:
Hit a nerve, eh? I've actually had some gaming articles and reviews published, but that's not my primary job.
The purpose of E3 has changed somewhat since I first went to it in Atlanta several years ago, mostly because the gaming press' tendency to be whores for the industry. They are trying to do the same thing with GDC ("Microsoft shows us Game X at GDC!"), but fortunately it is (mostly) still a convention for developers to talk to each other.
JackFrost2012
Banned
Open Source said:
Is your primary job being an annoying troll?
M3wThr33 said:
Oh man, if you did that, you wouldn't be able to do this..
25) Cross the street for lunch! In the back alleys and sidestreets around the LACC, dozens of Mexicans have set up portable grills where you can get HUGE HOT DOGS WRAPPED IN BACON. And they're only $3!!! Just don't think about germs and health codes and crap, they're great. Had like twenty last year.
It was the gaming equivalent of teabagging Oprah on Live TV. It will never, ever be forgotten. He is the single biggest tard in the history of electronic entertainment. Run to his house now and wake him up and tell him. NO FORGETTING.
Nobody can even remember what the fuck Nintendo revealed that E3, because of him.
No, that's GDC. E3 is primarily marketing press and retail. Development not so much.
Grizzlyjin
Supersonic, idiotic, disconnecting, not respecting, who would really ever wanna go and top that
Stinkles said:
Oh god, somebody please post the video of this guy. I have to see it now. :lol
(28) If in the weeks leading up to E3 you have been deathmarching to finish a floor demo for an ill-fated licensed console title and
(a) said title is going to earn a Gamespot review that contains the word "doomed", and*
(b) said title is going to ultimately settle at a Metascore south of 50*
then when you are dispatched to E3 to get feedback from the floor demo, DO NOT actually watch the E3 attendees play the game, and see their dissapointment, confusion and frustration with the software, and/or their mockery as they leave the kiosks, and ultimately come to the realization that even the payed "game demo assistants" who stand by the kiosks are barely feigning enthusiasm because you maythink that you couldn't feel any worse about having to pour overtime into a bad project but you will be wrong!
(29) DO run in to the lead engineer and the lead designer of Gitaroo Man, and have a fascinating and amusing conversation with them in which you just want to tell them that Gitaroo Man is the best game you have played all year but they dismiss this and repeatedly implore you to tell them what is wrong with the game in your opinion.
*requires precognition, or maybe just a rudimentary understanding of the marketplace and the average gamer's tastes, i.e. you are not a certain publisher
(a) said title is going to earn a Gamespot review that contains the word "doomed", and*
(b) said title is going to ultimately settle at a Metascore south of 50*
then when you are dispatched to E3 to get feedback from the floor demo, DO NOT actually watch the E3 attendees play the game, and see their dissapointment, confusion and frustration with the software, and/or their mockery as they leave the kiosks, and ultimately come to the realization that even the payed "game demo assistants" who stand by the kiosks are barely feigning enthusiasm because you maythink that you couldn't feel any worse about having to pour overtime into a bad project but you will be wrong!
(29) DO run in to the lead engineer and the lead designer of Gitaroo Man, and have a fascinating and amusing conversation with them in which you just want to tell them that Gitaroo Man is the best game you have played all year but they dismiss this and repeatedly implore you to tell them what is wrong with the game in your opinion.
*requires precognition, or maybe just a rudimentary understanding of the marketplace and the average gamer's tastes, i.e. you are not a certain publisher
Mr Nash
square pies = communism
Milkman said:
But there's so much fun to be had with people that want to say something in Japanese, but don't know a word!
If I'm ever approached by someone for a quick translation so they can dazzle people by speaking Japanese during a question period, I simply must tell them to say, "Boku no tsuyoi mara wa teiko dekimasen. Sore wa meisaku desu."
Good times...
suikodan
Member
28 - If you go to a Round Table with the developpers of the new Zelda on GCN, stay sitted if your only question is going to be "Where does the Maturelda game fits into the serie's timeline?".
(I saw a guy asking about Metroid Prime 2's multiplayer mode and where it fits in the Metroid timeline, and the GameSpot guy was sleeping during that roundtable :lol )
(I saw a guy asking about Metroid Prime 2's multiplayer mode and where it fits in the Metroid timeline, and the GameSpot guy was sleeping during that roundtable :lol )
M3wThr33 said:
You have to understand that you can now buy this game for $9.99 and even $4.99 in some stores; the stock just lingers of course, and surely there can only have been one production run. I never checked the NPD numbers on it past the first month... I'll pass on revealing the game however; like the Bard's Play, it should not be named.
Drinky Crow
Banned
29.) Don't actually GO to E3. Hook up with some peeps and bum around LA for awhile. If you get the urge to play games, bring a fucking PSP and play it in your hotel room when you aren't drinking.
30.) If you aren't a legitimate member of the press assigned to cover E3, waiting longer than five minutes in line to play ANY game -- especially a Nintendo bongo game -- makes you a total fucking asschimp. See 29. Go pub crawling instead, pick up a hooker, and call her Samus Aran.
30.) If you aren't a legitimate member of the press assigned to cover E3, waiting longer than five minutes in line to play ANY game -- especially a Nintendo bongo game -- makes you a total fucking asschimp. See 29. Go pub crawling instead, pick up a hooker, and call her Samus Aran.
Drinky Crow
Banned
Damn straight we do.
Azure Dream
Member
Juice said:
Bull. If it was that easy, I'd have gone last year, when things were even more in my favor. My sis was even doing direct promotion work for WB for her fansite that year, and not even she could squirm anything.
The restrictions this year seem stringently enforced, and detailed, even if you BS it to a certain extent, the _easiest_ you can make it is having a business credit card. Overall, I've run a fansite for about 7 years now; I'm not quite sure when it begins to "count," if ever. But for now, no, they don't just let us "unworthy" ones in.