demon said:
heh, that's the thing. I realized a while after that the depressing stuff is what she pulled me down to and focused my attention on. But yeah, that's the trap going back to the controversy and shit. I'm much better off afterwards but it took a lot of effort to escape that pull you get from a girl. The top half is retrospective but posted first. They should probably be seperate posts but I didnt want to posts back to back and i typed the top. The bottom half of the post is revisiting what crap it was and that's what happens if you live in the past which i don't. I just thought I'd fill in the details to help relate the shit you get from them. You gotta take that as a grain of salt which many people can't do. That's one the ways I'm real happy in lige now. Think back to the day to day thoughts I had while I was still with her and I shudder like a dog shaking off mud. I don't have to worry about any of that anymore and Im much better off for it. Im sure something will come along that will make that seem like it was the stupidest thing ever to get hung up on. We're all looking for lifetime love way too hard these days.