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[aoi tsuki]

Seriously I could never forgive myself if I gave up the baby for adoption. The way I feel is that it is no longer my life but rather to live for the baby. If that makes any sense.

So the pill prevents fertilization or just further develpoment? Since its already been weeks I dont see how its different from abortions where its been several months.

Morning after pill prevents fertilization. RU-486 is a chemical abortion. i don't know how things go from here (never been in this situation myself), but i'd recommend you hit you're nearest clinic, or call Planned Parenthood (1-800-230-PLAN), get some info on abortion methods, and talk to the girl and see where you're headed on this. Waiting around on a message board isn't going to do any good.

i don't know about the health risks, but i would wager there's a lot less psychological stress on her using RU-486 versus having a traitional abortion. i don't mean to press the abortion issue, but if you're going to go that route, you have a limited amount of time before it's an option, especially with RU-486.

 

[Piecake]

Not entirely true. You'd be surprised how far you can go with the courts on matters of this nature. Its a man's child as well.

Are you sure? I always thought the law says that women have complete control of their body and their reproductive organs, and they are the only ones who can decide if they want an abortion or keep the baby.

Ive heard of men going to court who tried to stop an abortion, but i always thought each time the court ruled in favor of the women.

 

[Cimarron]

1. She's 19 and your 27 with a good job.
2. You guys only known each other for a few month's.

I dunno bruh. No offense you really need to consider the possibility that this baby may not even be yours. Could be that she is still messing around with some other guys and is hoping that the child is yours since you seem like a responsible fellow. I believe like several others in this thread....


DON'T SIGN SHIT UNTIL YOU GET A PATERNITY TEST!!!!

Don't worry about hurting her feelings either.... Currents paternity testing techiques don't even require the mother.
http://www.genelex.com/paternitytesting/paternitytypes.html#motherless

Hell don't even waste time. If she is will you can get a paternity even BEFORE the child is born. I'd do this if I was really worried about paternity. It could save you some bucks on paying for some other mans bastard. Harsh but true. Do what you can to protect yourself. But if the child is yours... suck it up and be a man.

 

[ohamsie]

I think that you should accompany her to a doctor's office so that you can both sit down and talk with him about what is best for everyone involved.

 

[SSGMUN10000]

There is that little hope that she is not pregnant. Monday she is going to the clinic to really find out. She took a test with a pregnancy kit. Dont know how accurate they are.

Cimarron she hasnt giving me any doubt that it will not be my baby. I know there is still that little doubt. If there is way w/o her knowing then Im all for it.

Is this the girl that refuses to give you head?

Yeah thats the same one. We finally had a conversation about that earlier this week. Her reasoning for not giving me head was that I wasnt her bf..meaning I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

 

[Tommie Hu$tle]

Her reasoning for not giving me head was that I wasnt her bf..meaning I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

Well it looks like you sure fixed her wagon. Tell her to pucker up and hook you up with a wet and sloppy.

 

[Musashi Wins!]

Yeah thats the same one. We finally had a conversation about that earlier this week. Her reasoning for not giving me head was that I wasnt her bf..meaning I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

Well...worst case/best case scenario...you'll probably get head soon.

 

[DarienA]

Well...worst case/best case scenario...you'll probably get head soon.

:lol

I have nothing to add to this thread... except that it simply amazes me that people in this day and age continue to have unprotected sex, and then act surprised when the partner turns up pregnant.

 

[CloudNL]

Im going to bed now maybe when I wake up it could have just been a bad dream.

Well, I don't want to be part of this bad dream. :lol

Seriously. Talk with your brothers, because you told that they are already daddy.

 

[SSGMUN10000]

:lol

I have nothing to add to this thread... except that it simply amazes me that people in this day and age continue to have unprotected sex, and then act surprised when the partner turns up pregnant.

Well instead of you know posting a meaningless reply u can give some sort of advice. That was the point of the thread.

 

[border]

Well it looks like you sure fixed her wagon.

:lol :lol :lol

Yeah, I usually don't like to perform oral sex on a girl until she officially asks me to be her boyfriend. Up until that point, it's only unprotected intercourse for her!

How the hell did things get so backwards that blowjobs became the "final step" in consumating a relationship?

 

[Cimarron]

"How the hell did things get so backwards that blowjobs became the "final step" in consumating a relationship?"

I know right? This seems so ass backwards to me! why the hell is oral sex consider to be initmate but getting pile drived aint? :lol

" If there is way w/o her knowing then Im all for it."

Click on the link my friend. It can be done. But believe me its for the best better to be safe than sorry. If y'all have only been dating for a few months you're still in the honey moon stage. She could have HIV for all you know.

 

[Phoenix]

Are you sure? I always thought the law says that women have complete control of their body and their reproductive organs, and they are the only ones who can decide if they want an abortion or keep the baby.

Ive heard of men going to court who tried to stop an abortion, but i always thought each time the court ruled in favor of the women.

Nope, they have not. There are cases where judges have rules in favor of the father and hopefully there will be more. If a father can be expected to pay child support if the child is allowed to be born then certainly he has some rights with respect to the killing of his child.

 

[KiNeSiS]

Congrats whoever you are

 

[Cimarron]

^^^^

IAWTP (dammit this is meant for phoenix's post)

At very least a man should be given the option to give up parental rights and not pay for child support if a woman decides to go ahead and have a child without his consent. Seems to be the only fair answer. If a woman wants to bring a child into the world without a father it should be her choice. And a man should be hijacked into fatherhood against his will. It all seems a bit lopsided if you ask me.

 

[Socreges]

Im 27 and she is 19.

Her brother is going to rape you with his fists.

 

[Azih]

I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

Where the hell is she.. high school?... oh, wait.

 

[ShadowRed]

Nope, they have not. There are cases where judges have rules in favor of the father and hopefully there will be more. If a father can be expected to pay child support if the child is allowed to be born then certainly he has some rights with respect to the killing of his child.

It's called wearing a rubber and putting it on correctly. It's not like we don't know what sex leads to. If you don't want the be forced to be a father wear a rubber and know how to use it or keep it in your pants.

 

[Lathentar]

Well instead of you know posting a meaningless reply u can give some sort of advice. That was the point of the thread.

You don't believe in abortion. Do you believe in birth control?

 

[LinesInTheSand]

Although I am strictly against abortion, in this case I see no other choice being that the two parents-to-be are borderline retarded.

 

[Cubsfan23]

Yeah thats the same one

:lol :lol oh the irony

 

[Lathentar]

Yeah thats the same one. We finally had a conversation about that earlier this week. Her reasoning for not giving me head was that I wasnt her bf..meaning I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

This girl needs to get her priorities straight. Unprotected sex is alright, but you must be in a COMMITTED relationship for a blowjob?

What the hell.

 

[SSGMUN10000]

Although I am strictly against abortion, in this case I see no other choice being that the two parents-to-be are borderline retarded.

Another meaningless post.


If you dont know me then just STFU.

 

[TAJ]

Why exactly are you opposed to abortion? If it's for religious reasons, that's a little silly, as you've already demonstrated your ability to set aside your beliefs when it suits you.
Oh, and I'm sorry your life had to end so early, even if you were asking for it with the whole no-condom thing.

 

[MC Safety]

Another meaningless post.


If you dont know me then just STFU.

Well, no one here knows you. They are, however, making assumptions based on the fact that you're asking for parental advice on an INTERNET VIDEO GAME FORUM.

And you're actively soliciting advice from these people. So you might want to expect that some of the responses won't be to your liking.

 

[DrLazy]

Congrads man.

Now I think the first thing you should do is comfort her. You're 27 and you're the guy. She's a 19-year-old girl. She needs to know that you will be there for her. Give her some smooches and be with her when she goes to the doctor. Then talk about what she wants to do: when to tell family, when should you/her meet each others family, adoption?, financial stuff, still dating?, moving in together?, shotgun wedding? (don't do it), etc.

You're in this together. Go talk to her.

 

[J2 Cool]

Well, Congrats man. Your life had to change sometime right? You're 27. Take it as a blessing and realize your life's going to change. It doesn't prevent you from being a responsible person or parent in the future. That's really all you can do, enjoy the great things about this whole thing. And also, get yourself some head man.

 

[Pochacco]

Poor kid.

 

[SSGMUN10000]

Poor kid.

Wrong thread.

 

[DarienA]

Well instead of you know posting a meaningless reply u can give some sort of advice. That was the point of the thread.

Advice? You hit up some girl you've known for 4 months bareback.... The girl is pregnant, you don't believe in abortion nor in giving up for adoption. Your path is already charted. Everybody has already given you the buck up and face that your life will never be the same advice. If you want me to repeat that advice with different verbage I will.

Here's a question though... wtf are you doing dating a 19yr old?

 

[fart]

no sorry man, you asked for this, you take what you get.

i love how symmetric your tendency to avoid responsibility is w/rt your real life and your VIDEO GAME BULLETIN BOARD ON THE INTERNET posts though.

and i do feel sorry for the kid if you go through with it, and by kid i mean both the girl you planted seed in and the resulting gestation.

 

[DSN2K]

only thing that matters now that you are their for this child and the mother.

 

[Fresh Prince]

Although I am strictly against abortion, in this case I see no other choice being that the two parents-to-be are borderline retarded.

In a sense you can't blame the 19 year old girl (much)- she's probably emotionally immature- I mean she is going out with a man 10 years her senior. Advice- WWJD?

 

[DarienA]

I know girls have babies younger than this... hell my mom had me when she was 18... but wow... at 19.... her life is now changed in ways she has not even begun to realize... certain freedoms, the ability to just get up and go........ having a child changes everything (understatement). I won't even get in to various costs...

 

[SSGMUN10000]

no sorry man, you asked for this, you take what you get.

i love how symmetric your tendency to avoid responsibility is w/rt your real life and your VIDEO GAME BULLETIN BOARD ON THE INTERNET posts though.

and i do feel sorry for the kid if you go through with it, and by kid i mean both the girl you planted seed in and the resulting gestation.

I dont understand y you feel sorry. Im going to be responsible for what Ive done.

 

[Phoenix]

In a sense you can't blame the 19 year old girl (much)- she's probably emotionally immature- I mean she is going out with a man 10 years her senior. Advice- WWJD?

Going out with someone 10 years older/younger than you isn't a sign of maturity, just one of adhering to social norms.

 

[Heezzi]

 

[Fresh Prince]

Going out with someone 10 years older/younger than you isn't a sign of maturity, just one of adhering to social norms.

Disclaimer I'm no psychologist but having no parents and then going out with a (much) older man does strike me as being looking as a little emotionally needy. All IMO of course.

 

[Koshiro]

Well instead of you know posting a meaningless reply u can give some sort of advice. That was the point of the thread.

I personally saw a lot of meaning in that post. Edit: And if you can't see any meaning in it, you've got a load more children coming your way mastermind champion.

Now confess that you were a complete dumbass, then step away from your computer, go make sure she actually is pregnent, then go buy the RU-486 dealy and prevent that bitch from having a baby. Given the maturity on display here, a baby should be the last thing you two are having.

 

[Littleberu]

WTF. 4 months?

Use CONDOMS god damnit.

 

[Mr. Blonde]

SSG=joke character/attention whore. :lol at the people who have been taking his posts seriously.

 

[marko]

Well, it seems many people are intent on giving you a hard time for how you got in this situation, but that is not really helpful. What happened, happened, it is in the past (and I'm sure you will learn in the future).

Based on your posts/age (and the salary post, haha), you seem like you are in a position to be a good father, but so much depends on the future mother. She is only 19, is she ready to be a parent? Do you think she can handle it? Doe she even want to have the child (adoption/abortion)?

If she does want to have the child (and not give it up for adoption).... You said you are still dating, what are the prospects of a long term relationship? What does she do now (college student/working, etc)? Does she have health insurance to cover her medical costs (new baby will be covered under your insurance, but if you are not married, she is not). Raising this baby as a couple is a viable option... but you have to be prepared if she has this baby and you are not a couple. Custody (be prepared to live near the mother the rest of your life to be fair for both parents seeing the child), child support if she has custody (this can be a lot of money), and numerous other iitems are all ssues if you are not a couple when raising the child.

Anyway, , good luck. Let us know how she feels about the situation(hopefully this story is real)

 

[Manabanana]

27 isn't a bad age to have a kid. You said your job is stable and you'd have no problem supporting kid. Sounds to me like you could handle it, but you're going through some sort of initial shock. Odds are you'll get fed up with the girl in a couple years or so, end up in some lengthy, needless court struggle and be a single father. It'll probably be better that way. You seem like you'd make a good father as far as I can tell. I can't say much but good luck.

 

[TAJ]

>>>Here's a question though... wtf are you doing dating a 19yr old?<<<

Please.... That's the only part of his story that makes sense.

 

[Brannon]

... but wow... at 19.... her life is now changed in ways she has not even begun to realize... certain freedoms, the ability to just get up and go........ having a child changes everything (understatement). I won't even get in to various costs...

It's part of the reason why I'm still a virgin. Once the baby comes screaming into the world, you give up a shitload of freedoms. Then the baby becomes mobile and can get into everything; you have to watch them, worry about them, think about them. They will control a big part of your life just because they're there. I take care of my nephew from time to time, and while fun, I understand that it can get extremely tiring. To have to do it Every Single Day AND NIGHT For Eighteen Years? One day is enough to tell me I'm not ready.

Here's a test; find somebody who will let you take care of their small child under the age of 3. (Not many will say no to such a request) Don't depend on your girlfriend; think of it as her still being weak from giving birth. YOU take care of that kid for the entire week, in your house, not calling the parents to get the kid back. If after that week is up you still think you're ready for the commitment, then thumbs up and good luck. If not, well the two options are still available, and to not take them would increase the chance of your child not having a fair chance in life.

That is all.

No it's not.

Should you go the daddy route, and just because it peeves me off, DON'T go blowing tens of thousands of dollars on your baby's clothes, crib, stroller, room, toys, etc. Nice but cheap things that get the job done are enough. You think he's really going to notice that you got his rattler from Tiffany's Jewelers? Save that money for food and healthcare.

 

[DarienA]

Should you go the daddy route, and just because it peeves me off, DON'T go blowing tens of thousands of dollars on your baby's clothes, crib, stroller, room, toys, etc. Nice but cheap things that get the job done are enough. You think he's really going to notice that you got his rattler from Tiffany's Jewelers? Save that money for food and healthcare.

Screw you man only the best for my daughter! She has 3 car seats, 3 swings, 3 jumper seats(swings and jumper seats are so we don't have to move them between the floors in our house, 3rd car seat is for missus parents. She's got a portable swing that we fold up to take with us on visits.... a portable playpen that has an additional piece you can place on top to turn it in to a bassinet, it folds in to a bag... then we have a portable full-size folding crib, pop a launch flip up the base, remove the front rail and it closes in on itself. That's at god-mommy's house right now because we stayed there christmas night. All of her stuff is electronic... lights, movement, sound, music, vibration, etc....

Unnecessary? Of course... but hey....

 

[Che]

It's part of the reason why I'm still a virgin. Once the baby comes screaming into the world, you give up a shitload of freedoms. Then the baby becomes mobile and can get into everything; you have to watch them, worry about them, think about them. They will control a big part of your life just because they're there. I take care of my nephew from time to time, and while fun, I understand that it can get extremely tiring. To have to do it Every Single Day AND NIGHT For Eighteen Years? One day is enough to tell me I'm not ready.

Man what you say doesn't make sense. You can't remain virgin and throw away so many great experiences just because you're afraid that you'll end up a father. There are so many ways you can prevent that. Condoms, pills, abortion, adoption.

 

[Wellington]

Yeah thats the same one. We finally had a conversation about that earlier this week. Her reasoning for not giving me head was that I wasnt her bf..meaning I hadnt officially asked to her to be my gf.

And yet she'll have unprotected sex with you and have your kid!?

The fuckin' times we live in.

 

[VPhys]

Here comes another kid that's going to rob me when I'm 40 years old.

 

[DarienA]

Man what you say doesn't make sense. You can't remain virgin and throw away so many great experiences just because you're afraid that you'll end up a father. There are so many ways you can prevent that. Condoms, pills, abortion, adoption.

Brilliant f'n reasoning... especially the last word.... don't reproduce.