WSJ: Superflously-pocketed knee-length britches rising source of domestic strife

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That thread got weird fast, so odd.

Anyway, I don't get why people should care what others wear. Sure, if you're into fashion and want to look good or whatever I guess I see why you would raise your nose to people that are still wearing hammer pants or wife beaters with mesh hats but at the end of the day, is it really your business?

I'm pretty short and have skinny legs so I can't "rock" any type of shorts which is why you would only see me with convertible cargo pants in shorts mode if I'm hiking in the jungle (seriously). Hell, my pajamas are long cotton pants (not that funky to be honest).

The article is hilarious though. I have an uncle that I love but he wears the WORST short pants ever. His girlfriend mocks him and he just wears them with pride. They're plaid cargos, lol.

My dad wears denim cutoffs and I die a bit inside every time I see him. ;_;
efyu_lemonardo said:
fashion is largely bullshit though
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Fashion is totally and absolutely bullshit. Superficial, snobbish bullshit, even.

A sense of style and self awareness I feel is important to a degree if you want to look good without following every fashion trend out there.
 
Historically, fashion has been a way to flaunt one's wealth and signal one's privilege. It's a very convenient shortcut to prevent inter-class mingling. When you're wearing designer clothes, you don't even have to waste your time talking to someone or showing them pictures of your private yacht to let them know you're wealthy. It is all transmitted through a single glance, ensuring everyone will be treated with the reverence their social station entitles them to, that much quicker. As an other example, consider recruiters requiring job applicants to wear a (fashionably well-fitted) suit to their job interview. Good luck finding the money for that if you're on minimum wage. Yet another way in which fashion helps maintain the social stratification.

The insidious thing about it is that we have been conditioned through our culture to reflexively judge people based on what they're wearing. I can intellectually denigrate fashion culture as above, but I would still subconsciously think less of someone if they're wearing hideous cargo short in public. What makes them hideous though? There is no law of nature saying certain clothes are ugly or pretty. It is not in our genes either, considering how quickly fashion standards change over time. If anything, the only objective criterion to judge clothes on that I can think of is practicality, and they compare pretty favourably there. Fashion is a pure social construct, and given all the bad things about fashion, wouldn't the truly progressive approach be to completely renounce it?

This thread actually makes me want to buy cargo shorts to stick it to all the stuck-up fashionistas, and tear down our rotten status quo, which serves only to preserve the privileges of a lucky few, in whatever small way I can.
 
Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
They went out of fashion after the '90s. Dudes just kept wearing them because they don't keep up with the times or care about themselves.
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No they didn't go out of style if they are what most dudes still wear. There is a difference being trendy and in style. Out of style would be jean shorts.
 
I only ever hear about this on GAF.

100% cargo shorts here. (well, Canada, so like 40%).

my wife would definitely toss the euro shorts. I showed her this article and she scoffed hard.
 
nynt9 said:
I'll just go ahead and put myself in the firing line because what are words worth if you don't put skin in the game.

nMahf9t.jpg


That's me with non cargo shorts. Right pocket contains wallet, keys and n3ds XL. Left pocket normally contains phone but I took it out. I normally put my keys in the back pocket but I had just picked up the mail and stuffed my keys in the front pocket temporarily because I'm lazy. As you can see you don't need cargo shorts to carry around a decent amount of stuff (I could fit a multitool in one pocket to appease some people who don't feel good unless they walk around with a full set of gear or something)

Mock away, I don't care.
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Hey man, you do you. Those little yacht-boy shorts just aren't my style.
 
nynt9 said:
I'll just go ahead and put myself in the firing line because what are words worth if you don't put skin in the game.

nMahf9t.jpg


That's me with non cargo shorts. Right pocket contains wallet, keys and n3ds XL. Left pocket normally contains phone but I took it out. I normally put my keys in the back pocket but I had just picked up the mail and stuffed my keys in the front pocket temporarily because I'm lazy. As you can see you don't need cargo shorts to carry around a decent amount of stuff (I could fit a multitool in one pocket to appease some people who don't feel good unless they walk around with a full set of gear or something)

Mock away, I don't care.
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Solid casual look. You get it.
 
Pagusas said:
All shorts are ugly, I've yet to see gaf post a single picture of shorts that would look good on the average gafer. Short shorts are hideous, no one wants to see some of your legs, esspecially above the knees.

I mean look at this ugly shit when you try to find good short guides:

maxresdefault.jpg


Fabric2.jpg


Those are all fricken gross looking. They either look like gumby blocks of color with no definition or structure, or silly oversized boxers the guys are wearing outside. On a lot of guys these shorter tighter shorts make them look overly feminine. The white dude on the very left looks like he found an old granny/nits bag and shoved his legs through it.

So if all shorts are ugly, and we need them for summer/trips, might as well wear the most practical ones, the ones with the most pockets and usefulness to a traveler.
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If that's whats expected I will just stick to cargo shorts, and jeans.
 
Nerfgun said:
I only ever hear about this on GAF.

100% cargo shorts here. (well, Canada, so like 40%).

my wife would definitely toss the euro shorts. I showed her this article and she scoffed hard.
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Exactly. I can go out anywhere today, and it will be a sea of cargo shorts.

I love how FashionistaGAF thinks the average person is some GQ cover model or tries to dress like one. I never, ever, see people dress like some on here expect dudes to dress. lol
 
Something can't be out of style or not trendy if a lot of people still wear them. Some of you don't understand those words but say them.

lol
 
SDCowboy said:
Exactly. I can go out anywhere today, and it will be a sea of cargo shorts.

I love how FashionistaGAF thinks the average person is some GQ cover model or tries to dress like one. I never, ever, see people dress like some on here expect dudes to dress. lol
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Dude regular shorts that stop at the knee with a standard amount of pockets aren't some fashionista thing. They're regular shorts.
 
Like I give an absolute fuck what some stranger in public thinks about an item of clothing I'm wearing. Good one. Everyone talking about "style" and "fashion sense", is that shit seriously that high on your fucking list of priorities? Especially to the point where you unironically hate certain clothing items and want to see them literally no longer being made/sold? I live in goddamn Mississippi so yeah, shorts is what I'm going to be wearing majority of the time and I don't care to carry a purse or a bag of any sort. Cargo shorts are comfortable and have utility. My phone, keys, wallet, and sometimes a pen and notebook or pack of gum goes in the side pockets. Not once have I ever had a woman detest me for wearing cargo shorts. Ever. not once have I had a guy tell me I should step my style game up as a 29 year old single dad. Honestly, I don't give a fuck. I have more important things in my daily grind to be concerned with and making sure my wardrobe is appealing to total strangers I have no reason to impress is not one of those things. Point and laugh because I'm defending something that I like which you hate. Grow the hell up. As they say, clothes don't make a man.
 
Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
Dude regular shorts that stop at the knee with a standard amount of pockets aren't some fashionista thing. They're regular shorts.
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I'm not talking about just the shorts. Many here ssem to think dudes need to dress like they're on their dad's yacht when they're just out running errands. lol
 
efyu_lemonardo said:
we don't have purses..


Always be prepared
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Neither do I, but I also rarely ever need more than my keys, wallet and phone. If I'm going to work I'm bringing a backpack to carry all my other stuff.

KHlover said:
At work (full length trousers):

Casually (shorts):

Smartphone
Powerbank
Wallet
Keys
3DS
Still notebook
Still pens
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Every time you go out you need to bring a powerbank, 3ds and a notebook?

jim-jam bongs said:
I'm a dad, I carry all sorts of random shit you don't need to know about.
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Cargo shorts are fine for dads. They're like the pen ultimate dad wear.

Pantaghana said:
Wallet, keys, phone.

I'm not putting my keys and phone in the same pocket, that's just begging for the phone to be scratched to hell. And putting anything in the same pocket with the wallet makes an ugly bulge, so all three items go into their own pocket. Because everything has it's own dedicated pocket, checking if everything is accounted for is quick and easy.
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Maybe shrink down the wallet and keys? I can comfortably fit all those things across two pockets without a huge bulge.
 
i wont buy any shorts or swim shorts or board shorts, cargo shorts or not, unless they come down at minimum to my knees. I'm not a european wearing spedos at the beach or want to expose anyone to my junk should i sit or lounge the wrong way.
 
TarpitCarnivore said:
Neither do I, but I also rarely ever need more than my keys, wallet and phone. If I'm going to work I'm bringing a backpack to carry all my other stuff.



Every time you go out you need to bring a powerbank, 3ds and a notebook?



Cargo shorts are fine for dads. They're like the pen ultimate dad wear.



Maybe shrink down the wallet and keys? I can comfortably fit all those things across two pockets without a huge bulge.
Click to expand...

Usually I go out to play Pokemon Go and MH these days, so yeah.

I don't strictly need that notebook, but it's been rather useful and I have the space, so why not?
 
nynt9 said:
I'll just go ahead and put myself in the firing line because what are words worth if you don't put skin in the game.

nMahf9t.jpg


That's me with non cargo shorts. Right pocket contains wallet, keys and n3ds XL. Left pocket normally contains phone but I took it out. I normally put my keys in the back pocket but I had just picked up the mail and stuffed my keys in the front pocket temporarily because I'm lazy. As you can see you don't need cargo shorts to carry around a decent amount of stuff (I could fit a multitool in one pocket to appease some people who don't feel good unless they walk around with a full set of gear or something)

Mock away, I don't care.
Click to expand...

I need more shorts like those, they look good.
 
Neuromancer said:
If cargo shorts aren't cool then I don't even know what's cool any more and also I don't care. I'm rapidly approaching 40 and I'm already married so I have nothing to lose.
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I love this attitude: 'I'm married so now I don't have to give a shit about my appearance or behaviour'. The old bait and switch for your partner eh?
 
Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
What's with the knees thing? Why are so many here afraid of shorts that stop above their knee?
Click to expand...

for starters, tan lines, i'm as white as a plucked chicken where the sun hasn't shone in years. Other places i have a nice olive tan. And no im not going to buy short board shorts or swimsuits just to fix that. Besides i like the look of shorts coming down past my knees, and my wife does too so i dont really give a fuck what anyone else thinks.
 
I find cargo shorts too bulky and heavy. I wear either black or grey UA/Adidas/Reebok board shorts or woven shorts with an interior mesh liner. I don't wear sorts passed the knee; have to show off the tear trops and make the panties wet.
 
daveo42 said:
I need more shorts like those, they look good.
Click to expand...

You just need to find shorts with smaller inseams. I personally love Outlier shorts, but I know the price will turn people off. However I've had them for over a year and beat the piss out of them, even gone swimming in them and they're still pretty damn sturdy. The only thing that has caused an issue is my damn seat bag on my bike.
 
nynt9 said:
I'll just go ahead and put myself in the firing line because what are words worth if you don't put skin in the game.

nMahf9t.jpg


That's me with non cargo shorts. Right pocket contains wallet, keys and n3ds XL. Left pocket normally contains phone but I took it out. I normally put my keys in the back pocket but I had just picked up the mail and stuffed my keys in the front pocket temporarily because I'm lazy. As you can see you don't need cargo shorts to carry around a decent amount of stuff (I could fit a multitool in one pocket to appease some people who don't feel good unless they walk around with a full set of gear or something)

Mock away, I don't care.
Click to expand...
Honestly I think you look great, even though I would never wear those (don't have the legs/body for it).

The guy posting pictures of Beckham saying he looks good in cargos. Oy vey.
 
My cargo shorts I bought this year are pretty slim and not baggy at all, they sit just above my knees, they don't look like MC Hammer cargos like Beckham was wearing in this thread. I have another pair of non cargo shorts but I don't like the way they fit and the pocket room is not enough to carry keys, wallet and phone so I wear them when I am not driving since I have a keyless entry to my home.
 
Liu Kang Baking A Pie said:
What's with the knees thing? Why are so many here afraid of shorts that stop above their knee?
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Yeah, this I don't get either. If I wear shorts I would most definitely want them to be above the knee. Below the knee just feels like I'm either Kevin Smith or El Chavo.
outunderthestars said:
My wife likes my cargo shorts because she never seems to have pockets of her own.
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Hah, that's such a wife move. I love that my wife doesn't carry a purse but I usually end up carrying her wallet/phone instead.
 
What's with the implication that choosing to not wear cargo shorts is somehow overly fashion conscious? It's just choosing to wear regular, normal ass shorts instead. Just instead of having extra pockets they have the normal amount of pockets.

They are just normal shorts.
 
cartographer said:
What's with the implication that choosing to not wearing cargo shorts is somehow overly fashion conscious? It's just choosing to wear regular, normal ass shorts instead. Just instead of having extra pockets they have the normal amount of pockets.

They are just normal shorts.
Click to expand...
Look at mister Paris runway fashionista over here.
 
cartographer said:
What's with the implication that choosing to not wear cargo shorts is somehow overly fashion conscious? It's just choosing to wear regular, normal ass shorts instead. Just instead of having extra pockets they have the normal amount of pockets.

They are just normal shorts.
Click to expand...

Its the condemnation of anyone who wears cargo shorts that brings out the 'overly fashion conscious' accusations. There is some top trolling going on here.

I do find it funny that dude who posted a pic is apparently rocking a "solid casual look" while wearing what looks like an old heavy metal band t-shirt.
 
cartographer said:
What's with the implication that choosing to not wear cargo shorts is somehow overly fashion conscious? It's just choosing to wear regular, normal ass shorts instead. Just instead of having extra pockets they have the normal amount of pockets.

They are just normal shorts.
Click to expand...

Just goes to show how most people still view cargo AS the "normal shorts". It also doesn't help that today, most shorts that aren't cargo either look like little yacht-boy shorts or super thin/tight Euro shorts. It's hard to find just regular fitting, not super tight or short, non-cargo shorts.

Also, you have to consider region. Those little plain pastel pink shorts might fly in the east coast. If you wore those on the west coast, people would likely assume you were a foreigner. lol
 
i wish more men used cargo shorts.
and fanny packs.
and sports sunglasses with baseball caps.
and crocs. preferably with socks.
in all settings.


the worse the competition looks, the better, is what i'm saying. long live alla that crap.
 
godelsmetric said:
men at women who don't shave their armpits: "gross, ugly, shave it or else!"

same men when women @ them for cargo shorts: "don't be judgemental and shallow!"
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Woman at man 'don't tell me to wear clothes that aren't practical and are uncomfortable' then secretly throws his cargo shorts in the trash.
 
A better article would be telling the minority that has some bizarre issue with cargo shorts to get over it because at this point, they are the go to shorts for most grown ups, and it ain't changing any time soon.
 
Nerfgun said:
I only ever hear about this on GAF.

100% cargo shorts here. (well, Canada, so like 40%).

my wife would definitely toss the euro shorts. I showed her this article and she scoffed hard.
Click to expand...

I hear about it all the time, in that it isn't really discussed much because it's just seen as self evident that they look bad.

If you don't care that is your right as a human being, and there is an argument that in certain situations function overrides form. Don't be annoyed that others will also judge on your appearance. That's life
 
I don't wear cargo shorts - mostly because I don't wear shorts full stop - but my casual wear is almost entirely combats. Wallet, phone, and sometimes powerbank in one side, cigarettes and miscellanea in the other, lighter in the fob pocket. Works like a charm.
 
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