Batman v Superman Spoiler Thread: Don't believe everything you read, Son

Status
Not open for further replies.
You remember that video of Matt and Trey Parker saying how every scene needs to affect the rest?

"This happens, that causes this to happen, and because that happens, this happens."

This movie is the embodiment of what happens when you don't follow that rule.

They mentioned that in the Double Toasted review, and it's really true.

Scenes are just happening, and you can't in any way predict what scene you're going to next. It feels random and disconnected even though they are all contributing (badly) to the same story.

EDIT:

I'm looking at what they said, and it's such good advice. If you can't fit the words "and then", "therefore" or "but" between scene transitions you've fucked up. "Therefore" - because this happens, this happens, "But" - this happens, and the next scene throws a wrench in the works.
 
Well, Batman was right about him. He was always right!

I guess Batman's superpower is that he always wins, after all.

"She was my world"

Wah, wah.

Snyder just doesn't like Superman, and doesn't understand Batman. Flash tells Bruce that he was right about Superman; he really is just a dude with superpowers in this universe. He's no Superman, certainly.

Haha you're 100% correct.
 
Can we talk about that bullshit Flash Future scene? Why the fuck is Flash delivering cryptic messages to Bruce in the past? Why he can't he just travel right back into the past and talk to Bruce? He's the fucking Flash! He can run through space and time, he has no need to deliver half-messages through some portal all he has to do is run real fast and end up in the past. Has Snyder managed to fuck up Flash as well?

Also, the movie made it clear that the flash visit was just a dream. Bruce wakes up with a jolt and Flash is gone.

So, the Flash can run so fast back in time that he can enter people's dreams now? Or Bruce was just dreaming about some guy he never met coming from the future.

This movie is a mess.
 
To be fair, that's not a NEW idea

The basis of the INjustice universe.

And I wanna say it was similar on Superman TAS a Brave New World.

And the death of the Flash made him kill Luthor in JL

Injustice revels in stupidity, don't remember that episode, and the bolded is a lot more reasonable than supreme evil overlord slippery slope Superman.
 
Can we talk about that bullshit Flash Future scene? Why the fuck is Flash delivering cryptic messages to Bruce in the past? Why he can't he just travel right back into the past and talk to Bruce? He's the fucking Flash! He can run through space and time, he has no need to deliver half-messages through some portal all he has to do is run real fast and end up in the past. Has Snyder managed to fuck up Flash as well?

The Flash's ability to control specific time and alternate reality travel depends heavily on who is writing the story. There isn't really anything consistent to "fuck up". He even says "Am I too soon? I'm too soon." or something like that, so there's clearly something else going on behind the scenes that limits his ability to accurately deliver the message. The real question is, why the entire scene was in the movie at all.
 
You remember that video of Matt and Trey Parker saying how every scene needs to affect the rest?

"This happens, that causes this to happen, and because that happens, this happens."

This movie is the embodiment of what happens when you don't follow that rule.

It's like everyone involved with this movie suffered a collective head injury that caused them to forget what they learned in Filmmaking 101.
 
And you know what? If Amy Adams and Henry Cavill had ACTUAL FUCKING CHEMISTRY that whole scene with him saying "This is my world. You are my world." would've maybe actually made me give a shit, even if it was badly written.

But, nope.
 
Injustice revels in stupidity, don't remember that episode, and the bolded is a lot more reasonable than supreme evil overlord slippery slope Superman.

I read all the year one stuff from the comic and the entire time I was in awe of how utterly stupid it all was.

Bruce isn't willing to kill Clark even after he becomes the embodiment of his deepest and darkest fears? Come on now.
 
This might have been pointed out before, but I have a question:

1. During the Lex party scene it seems like both Clark and Bruce know each others secret identity. Batman being the greatest detective that he is, wouldn't he have done research on Clark's past and knew about his mother being Martha all along? Why does he turn into a complete idiot when Superman sayings Martha....
 
I watched this yesterday and it was proper naff. I was thoroughly disappointed. I like Ben Affleck as Batman and Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman but everything else was just downright terrible.
 
This might have been pointed out before, but I have a question:

1. During the Lex party scene it seems like both Clark and Bruce know each others secret identity. Batman being the greatest detective that he is, wouldn't he have done research on Clark's past and knew about his mother being Martha all along? Why does he turn into a complete idiot when Superman sayings Martha....

If only they could have discovered each others identity in a clever, fun, and organic way:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F90nxOlsm1s
 
Why did Superman interrupt Batman chasing down some bad guys to deliver his threat?

Like...why would he do that?
That's not even the worst part. If he had a tracker on the truck, why the hell go all Fury Road on the thugs instead of just letting them take the shipment where they wanted. It didn't seem like he had much of a problem stealing the kryptonite anyway from Luther.

The more I think about it the messier it gets. Like WTF were they thinking. And I find the whole philosophical/mythological talk by Terrio so funny now when even the most basic plotpoints make no sense at all.
 
Why did Superman interrupt Batman chasing down some bad guys to deliver his threat?

Like...why would he do that?

And how did he NOT see or sense the Kryptonite in said chase?

Wouldn't seeing the only alien material being carried off by questionable people NOT raise a few alarm bells?
 
Whelp, my dad likes everything and he hated the movie, I'm honestly shocked.

My dad came out of the movie coming up with ways to defend it.

"Well ... DC are behind, and they have to catch up, so they don't have time to develop characters"

I shit you not. He's right, though.
 
I watched this yesterday and it was proper naff.
This is the most English thing I've heard all week.
I read all the year one stuff from the comic and the entire time I was in awe of how utterly stupid it all was.

There's a scene where Constantine bursts out laughing when he sees how uncomfortable Batman is in the cab with Detective Chimp. I'm fairly certain it's purposely silly at this point.
 
You're shitting me. Really?

That explains the scene. Snyder probably cut the explanation.

lol
It will be explained in the WW solo film.

I think it's absolutely hilarious people think it's a bloated film, yet they want the filmmakers to explain every little detail. Whether Diana is an antique dealer or not isn't particularly relevant to the scene.
 
That's not even the worst part. If he had a tracker on the truck, why the hell go all Fury Road on the thugs instead of just letting them take the shipment where they wanted. It didn't seem like he had much of a problem stealing the kryptonite anyway from Luther.

The more I think about it the messier it gets. Like WTF were they thinking. And I find the whole philosophical/mythological talk by Terrio so funny now when even the most basic plotpoints make no sense at all.

Luckily he didn't blow the tracker off of the vehicle.

I dug the 'Plan A', 'Plan B' aspect of that. Seems like something Batman would do - "I'll try to get the kryptonite before it's transported, but if something goes south I'll know where it went". But they he proceeds to engage in an explosive chase that reveals he's tracking them, and risks destroying the tracker. The only reason the tracker remained on the vehicle, or wasn't discovered when they knew they were being followed, was by luck, within the narrative. Or Lex Luthor hid it so Batman would get the kryptonite. I dunno.
 
I love that so many vehicles in that chase got blown to smithereens and even the truck that had the tracker on it was nearly shorn in half, but conveniently the tracker was completely unharmed.
 
The only consistent thing about Superman in this movie (and MoS) is that he just doesn't think about the repercussions of his actions. Even does it in that bathtub scene.
 
And how did he NOT see or sense the Kryptonite in said chase?

Wouldn't seeing the only alien material being carried off by questionable people NOT raise a few alarm bells?

Superman's powers either don't work half the time or he uses them extremely selectively, which would make him an idiot. He let all those people die in that explosion because he wasn't paying attention. He even admitted it. He can hear Lois falling off a building and shit but he can't hear is own fucking mother being kidnapped?
 
What did Lex do to make it so Clark couldn't find her? She was in the same city next to a window.

The same thing he did so Supes couldn't detect a bomb just in front of him capable of destroying a whole building, Lex has been analyzing Superman for more than 18 months, he was one step ahead on him all the time, even if this Lex was totally deplorable and unconvincing Lex Luthor is still one of the smartest (if not the most) man on the planet.

DerZuhälter;199274368 said:
The movie has such gigantic issues that I haven't even heard the nitpick of the conviniently placed server room of Lexcorp right next to Lex Luthor's kitchen, that's protected by an open glass door.

It was kind of stupid yeah. I will say that given it was protected by a "military grade encryption" that Dianna couldn't go trough, and that getting inside LEx House uninvited is probably impossible, YOu could say Lex doesn't care about security of his server room.

Why did Superman interrupt Batman chasing down some bad guys to deliver his threat?

Like...why would he do that?

BEcause he wanted to stop his Brutality right there, Superman felt he saved those goons by stopping Batman.
 
DerZuhälter;199275456 said:
The only consistent thing about Superman in this movie (and MoS) is that he just doesn't think about the repercussions of his actions. Even does it in that bathtub scene.

Fuck the people who live under them, I guess. Superman stops trains, not leaky ceilings.

That scene was stupid as all hell. :lol

"Do you bleed? You will."

Fight ensues.

"Oh, apparently not."

He cuts his face to see, but I guess you can't have blood pouring out in a PG-13 film.
 
I love that so many vehicles in that chase got blown to smithereens and even the truck that had the tracker on it was nearly shorn in half, but conveniently the tracker was completely unharmed.
It was also emitting a pretty noticable beeping sound and flashing light. :lol
 
And how did he NOT see or sense the Kryptonite in said chase?

Wouldn't seeing the only alien material being carried off by questionable people NOT raise a few alarm bells?

And if Luthor wanted Batman to steal it all along, why did he hire truck loads of bazooka wielding bad guys to transport it?
 
And if Luthor wanted Batman to steal it all along, why did he hire truck loads of bazooka wielding bad guys to transport it?

He probably didn't want Batman to know he was making it easy for him.

I can believe that Lex Luthor would do that. Outsmarting Batman by making his plans just hard enough to discover, but also making sure Batman will be able to figure it out.
 
Oh and can someone explain to me the whole cryptic messages to Bruce Wayne orchestrated by Lex? He said he wrote those messages to tip Batman over the edge to fight Superman, implying he's long known that Bruce is Batman. But, how were those messages supposed to push him against Superman? Who was Bruce supposed to think was sending him those messages? And, despite all this how was it that Lex didn't ensure those messages were delivered?

He makes it seem as though those messages were this great part of his overall grand plan that worked perfectly but Bruce never received any of those messages until the last one and only then did he ask to see the rest of them. Had he not been where he was at that time he would have likely never received or seen any of those messages.

EDIT:

Another fucking question, who the fuck was that Jimmy Olsen CIA guy? Was he a Lex Luthor plant or was he actually working for the government? If he's working for the government why did he need to have a tracker on him?
 
This movie just proved why I don't like Superman. When you have a hero that's bullet proof, has laser eyes, can fly, can't really die as long as there is a sun, has super strength, and really one weakness that's easily circumvented, (and probably other things I can't think of) then there really isn't many places you can take the character or do with him.
 
Another thing that bothers me is that the whole fight could have been avoided if Superman had simple yelled ' LEX IS PLAYING US'.
I get that some people liked that fight ultimately, I didn't care for it in the trailers, and I didn't care for it in the movie. Even less so now considering what I mentioned above. In fact, now that I think about it, for me, the movie's flaws are in full display somewhere around that point.

Another Lex, ruins another Superman movie.
 
Oh and can someone explain to me the whole cryptic messages to Bruce Wayne orchestrated by Lex? He said he wrote those messages to tip Batman over the edge to fight Superman, implying he's long known that Bruce is Batman. But, how were those messages supposed to push him against Superman? Who was Bruce supposed to think was sending him those messages? And, despite all this how was it that Lex didn't ensure those messages were delivered?

He makes it seem as though those messages were this great part of his overall grand plan that worked perfectly but Bruce never received any of those messages until the last one and only then did he ask to see the rest of them. Had he not been where he was at that time he would have likely never received or seen any of those messages.

I didn't understand that either. Batman never received those messages and he was angry enough at Superman already. And if he did see those messages he'd probably just think that the dude who got his legs amputated was having a mental break, and I don't know if that would make him hate Superman that much more.
 
My nephew is 10 and wants to go see the movie. And his little sister is 6. He's asking me to take them to the movie tomorrow. I feel like an asshole wanting to tell them no.

This is your fault Snyder you fucking tool
 
This whole movie was a giant walking talking version of Plot Induced Stupidity.

Yep. I honestly don't care that much about the Batman "it's not murder, it's manslaughter" stuff, but making him criminally stupid is an affront to any version of his character. He's the World's Greatest Detective. Full stop.
 
Oh and can someone explain to me the whole cryptic messages to Bruce Wayne orchestrated by Lex? He said he wrote those messages to tip Batman over the edge to fight Superman, implying he's long known that Bruce is Batman. But, how were those messages supposed to push him against Superman? Who was Bruce supposed to think was sending him those messages? And, despite all this how was it that Lex didn't ensure those messages were delivered?

He makes it seem as though those messages were this great part of his overall grand plan that worked perfectly but Bruce never received any of those messages until the last one and only then did he ask to see the rest of them. Had he not been where he was at that time he would have likely never received or seen any of those messages.

EDIT:

Another fucking question, who the fuck was that Jimmy Olsen CIA guy? Was he a Lex Luthor plant or was he actually working for the government? If he's working for the government why did he need to have a tracker on him?

Look, Chris Terrio is an oscar winning writer. Why question his script?!
 
This movie just proved why I don't like Superman. When you have a hero that's bullet proof, has laser eyes, can fly, can't really die as long as there is a sun, has super strength, and really one weakness that's easily circumvented, (and probably other things I can't think of) then there really isn't many places you can take the character or do with him.

Well, we once had an entire animated TV series of just Superman which managed to crank out several seasons of amazing Superman episodes. So...
 
I'm going to say it.

I think Goyer's script in MoS is a masterpiece compared to BvS.

The Smallville Battle in MoS is better than any action set piece in BvS.

Superman's first flight in MoS gave me more feels than the goddamn Trinity together in one shot in BvS.

MoS may have had some questionable editing during certain scenes, but at least it followed the Trey Parker rule and their not seemingly random, than this bullshit.

Faora was much more badass than WW in BvS

Zod was a better villain than both Lex and Doomsday combined by orders of magnitude.

Superman actually smiles MORE in MoS than in BvS

Lois Lane felt more like a character in MoS than the damsel-in-distress used to forward the garbage plot in BvS.

My point? Man of Steel is a better film than Batman vs Superman is just about every fucking way possible and it's an enormous step down.
 
Another thing that bothers me is that the whole fight could have been avoided if Superman had simple yelled ' LEX IS PLAYING US'.
"DID LEX TALK TO YOU? DID HE TELL YOU ABOUT MARTHA?"
then skip to Batman reacting to Martha.

Bam problem solved. The problem was "I don't want to fight" repeated pretty much until he got pissy about the machine gun trap.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top Bottom