GAF I need to lose weight and I'm struggling

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Goron2000

best junior ever
GAF I need your help, I have nobody around me that can support me through what is for me, an incredibly hard challenge. I need to lose weight but i've been having an incredibly hard time doing it. I've been alone for about 2 years now as the games industry is hard to get into, so my career required that I moved away from my family and friends.

2 years ago I weighed 230 pounds but now I am around 320 pounds and I'm lost. Every day I say "this is the day" but by lunch time it's out the window and i've eaten 2 pastries and a hot dog. I want to get out of this, I feel awful both mentally and physically and most of all I feel lonely and isolated.

Give me whatever you can give me whether it's advice, weight loss tips, your personal experiences or just support. I want to break out of this cycle and If i'm honest I know exactly how to lose weight but it's a very much a psychological barrier that I need to overcome.

I've just thrown all of the junk that i've bought for myself in a bag and will be taking it to work tomorrow to leave in the kitchen. I want this and I definitely don't want to be sat in a doctor's office one day being told that my inability to lose weight has ended my life early.
 

Salsa

Member
sign up to a gym



doesnt need to be all about eating less and it'll hopefully keep you motivated once you get into a rhythm
 

Shang

Member
What I did was set a soft limit to how many grams of carbohydrates I ate in a day. If you go over, don't sweat it, just try not to do it the next day. That coupled with some exercise, even just walking around your neighborhood makes a big difference.
 

bjork

Member
Maybe go on walks to get out and see some new people while getting some exercise in the process? I'm not sure if this is an option where you live, but it could be.
 

ezrarh

Member
1. Write out a new grocery list and keep to that when you go to the grocery store. Pick items that are low in sugar and low in calorie that you still would like to eat. Basically stay away from anything in a cardboard box.

2. Find something physically exerting that you might enjoy doing and start out doing it at least once a week. You don't have to go to the gym to start especially at your weight.

3. Do you have a friend or someone to talk to? If so, see if they'll help keep you on track - basically someone to talk to once a week and update.
 

Slo

Member
The first week is going to suck. During that first week it's going to be hardest for your body to cope not losing the constant over-rewarding of yourself you've been doing.

After that first week it gets much, much easier. But to be frank, you need to stop being so god damned weak.
 

jmdajr

Member
Try to give up almost everything with added sugars and refined carbs.

Problem is....most are addicted to them! It's meant to be so..and you have to fight it.
 

Goron2000

best junior ever
could be a form of depression

I have been diagnosed with depression for many years and I believe it to be the main cause of my problem. My depression is going to be with me forever and I can accept that but I need to lose weight despite my inner desires to hurt myself with food.
 

Ekdrm2d1

Member
Discard everything in your freezer and allow your refrigerator to be nearly empty at the end of the week. Eat fresh! Make yourself a salad (or vegetable melody) for lunch and dinner combined with a lean protein source such as chicken breast, fish, or tofu.

Edit: Raw-ish salad. With no cheese, bacon, ham, dressing, etc.

Quit the alcohol and smoking for a month. No chips, pizza, Mexican food, fast food, chocolate, candy, etc. for also a month. Quitting the alcohol a lone will (should) get you some weight loss.

No more pastries and hot dogs! (for now.)

Cardio, cardio, cardio. Go running 5 consecutive days a week. Monday - Friday go for a run. If you can't run, start small and move on up.
 

Stinkles

Clothed, sober, cooperative
I've found that thinking about hunger as a sign of progress helps me. I make sure I have lots of zero sum snacks to pig out on when I get tempted - pickles, peppers, tomatoes etc. And daily exercise.
 

Guevara

Member
Losing weight is pretty tough. Exercise isn't enough. Diet isn't enough.

Find a way to workout that fits your life: (walk to work? bike to work? P90X at home after work?). Important that you can do it 4+ days per week without excuses. Going to the gym can sometimes be hard, which is why I'm suggesting things that should be easy. I've gotten great results from P90X, but also from a normal gym, and also just from running. Don't bother trying to coordinate with friends, honestly.

Consider your food options: try and be cognizant of everything you eat. Plan out your breakfasts, pack lunch 2 days a week (to start). Build from there. Again it has to be super simple or you won't do it. Just view breakfast as something boring you need to eat every day.

One decent tip: if you are like me, you often wait until way after you are hungry, overcompensate, then eat way too much. Pro-tip: eat before you are really hungry, when you can plan with a clear head. Eat lunch at 11AM and you'll probably eat less. Eat dinner at 6PM (or whenever you get home) instead of later, on the couch.
 
I went from 230 to 215 over the course of a couple months, my goal is to be 160 or so. I suggest you try to cut back on the fast food, and limit yourself to one day where u can just chill and enjoy a pizza or something. the first few weeks are tough because you're so used to eating all those goodies, but try replacing them with healthier snacks. After about 2 to 3 weeks eating healthier items will feel like normal, also I noticed I feel a lot better after eating when I eat a specific portion as opposed to eating until full. That took a long time to get used To. I still have a long way to go to, I joined a gym and have been reading the fitness gaf thread. Go check it out, it's full of useful information!
 

brawly

Member
sign up to a gym

doesnt need to be all about eating less and it'll hopefully keep you motivated once you get into a rhythm

That is exactly what it's about. Without a calorie deficit there will be no weight loss.

So yeah, do that OP. What I recommend is intermittent fasting: eat from 12 o'clock midday to 8PM, fast for the other 16 hours. Drink lots of water. No calories in those 16 hours.
 

jmdajr

Member
For starters you have to give up sugary drinks. Soda, juice, gatorade. Hell it's a start and a VERY important one. That shit is probably doing more damage than anything else.
 

Freshmaker

I am Korean.
2 years ago I weighed 230 pounds but now I am around 320 pounds and I'm lost. Every day I say "this is the day" but by lunch time it's out the window and i've eaten 2 pastries and a hot dog.

Try swapping out veggies for your snacks. Stuff like a carrot doesn't have a ton of calories.

And don't buy pastries.
 

Pendas

Banned
Align your video game goals with Workout Goal.

I used to do this when I played MMO's or WoW. Whenever you gain a level or complete a goal... stop. Then do 10-20 pushups / run around the block / Squats, or whatever you prefer. You can do this with almost any video game, but you have to STICK TO IT. See gaming as a reward for working out to trick your brain into doing it.

It helped me maintain a nice body during my crazy gaming days when I kept procrastinating my workouts. Also.. fix your diet immediately.Your body doesn't need 2 pastries and hot dog to feel full no matter how big you are.
 

Goron2000

best junior ever
sign up to a gym



doesnt need to be all about eating less and it'll hopefully keep you motivated once you get into a rhythm

Embarrassing story time: I signed up to the gym and went to my induction without any gym gear just in my jeans and shirt because I had no idea what it was. The guy went round and showed me how every piece of equipment works but had to do it himself and he told me nobody had ever done what I had. I was so embarrassed I didn't go again.

I think for the first month I will do cardio and build up my confidence and I will go back there, this time in appropriate gym wear.
 

Krakatoa

Member
That is exactly what it's about. Without a calorie deficit there will be no weight loss.

The additional workout at the GYM may make him calorie deficient.

The key though, as others have mentioned is sort our your diet. Once you have that in place things will begin to improve.

If you do join a place to workout, try and make sure its with a group of people. This will help keep you motivated.something like crossfit or http://www.orangetheoryfitness.com/
 

Nyoro SF

Member
For starters you have to give up sugary drinks. Soda, juice, gatorade. Hell it's a start and a VERY important one. That shit is probably doing more damage than amything else.

That's one that people tend to overlook. You have to remove all sugar drinks from your diet and stick to nothing but water. Make sure you have a water filter so it's easy to get fresh water. That's a tough one to give up, but if you can get over that hill you'll notice you aren't as tired as before for starters.
 

Joyful

Member
water, lots of water
cutdown on breads and sugar, dont stop completely,just less
walks, try at least 30-60mins, or a if you have a bike use that
buy some weights and lift em
 

otapnam

Member
Align your video game goals with Workout Goal.

I used to do this when I played MMO's or WoW. Whenever you gain a level or complete a goal... stop. Then do 10-20 pushups / run around the block / Squats, or whatever you prefer. You can do this with almost any video game, but you have to STICK TO IT. See gaming as a reward for working out to trick your brain into doing it.

It helped me maintain a nice body during my crazy gaming days when I kept procrastinating my workouts. Also.. fix your diet immediately.Your body doesn't need 2 pastries and hot dog to feel full no matter how big you are.

I used to use fitocracy.com to track my workouts. It gamified the exercise and gave points to different activities. There was also a decent community at the time.

You can also try getting a fit bit and tracking that way. There's a huge social scene so you will get support from the community that's doing the same thing you are.

Anything you do is better than doing nothing. And each day you stay committed gets you closet to your goal. Good luck!
 

Kerned

Banned
Get a calorie counting app like Lose It! or My Fitness Pal and start using it. Most importantly, be honest with yourself when tracking. Don't cheat. Losing weight is largely just a matter of calories in needing to be lower than calories out, but it's important for you to see how many calories you are taking in.

Just track for a week. Don't worry about making big changes. Get a sense for where you are at, then set a goal for yourself. It's hard at first, but it gets easier and you will start to see results. Combine this with daily exercise and you'll be on your way.

It's never too late.
 
Become self absorbed. Take lots of selfies. Cull the negative people in your life. I'm not joking.

You'll probably hate yourself by the end, but it will work.
 
At one point I weighed 260 lbs. My weight now is around 175 to 180. Losing that much weight was the hardest thing I have ever done. I had to learn to hate myself. Honestly, that's what did it. I had tried to lose weight plenty of times before. I always quit. I tried lying to myself, saying I was okay with who I was. That it didn't matter. But it does. People treat you differently. You feel differently. All of a sudden you aren't ashamed of yourself. It's fucking liberating.

Get naked in front of a mirror and jump around a bit. Do you like what you see?
 

Merrymint

Member
Great start getting rid of your junk food. I have a few things that help me lose weight + stay on track...not to say I haven't lost track but this keeps me more focused than and feeling less like a slip up will happen:

  1. Meal prep: Plan what you want to eat a week in advance. Write a list, and buy everything you plan to eat for that week. Prep it in those awesome plastic containers.
  2. Water. I can't tell how important it is to have water nearby. Drink water before meals, and after. Drink water when you don't feel thirsty. It can help you feel less hungry.
  3. Keep snacks, like fruit or nuts around. When you feel tempted if you can a piece of dark chocolate helps me. If you like dark chocolate.
  4. Join a gym or go for walks/light jogs around your neighborhood.
  5. don't sit sedentary for too long. if you're playing the game take a break every hour or two and do jumping jacks or walk in place even. It keeps the blood flowing.
  6. I didn't think it would work, but having a fitbit and seeing how little I walked in comparison to my friends kinda made me do a lot of things different.

These are things I really just started, as I'm a work in progress too, but its working. Just keep trying and have faith in yourself and also it works to have a goal. Keeping short goal yet realistic goals will give you progress.
 

BFIB

Member
It's a meal at a time.

-download MyFitnessPro to track your calories
-start getting 30 min of exercise a day. I do DDP Yoga and it's awesome
-don't get discouraged. Like I said, a meal at a time.
 

Tubobutts

Member
If you haven't already, download an app like myfitnesspal to set a calorie goal and to keep track of what you're eating. If you can, get a device that can track the amount of calories you burn while exercising so that can be incorporated in to your diet so you don't over eat thinking you burned enough extra calories to compensate.

Also a food scale is very useful so you don't have to guess.
 

fep

Member
If you don't want to count calories for whatever reason try YouFood.

It is an app where you take a picture every time you eat something. It helps build awareness of what you are eating without getting really strict with calorie counting.

If you are struggling it is a simple and easy task that can provide lots of benefits as long as you are honest with it! You can add a smiley or sad face to how you felt about food each day and some notes if you like.

Other advice: don't hate yourself and realize it is a journey of ups and downs. Everyone has a different path - don't give up!

Good luck :)

I went from 280 lbs at my heaviest to 160 and I continue to tune my body through diet and activity. I may not be as focused as I'd like sometimes, but that is OK. I still have a long way to go to get where I want and a lifetime to do it. As others have said, one step at a time. Keep trying and something will work or click for you and you'll be off to the races.
 
Start walking/jogging. Use my fitness pal to track what you eat. Helped me stop drinking. I'm trying to run 3x a week and lift 3x a week with a rest day on Sunday where I can eat whatever I want for one meal. Try to only drink water or coffee. Splash of lemon juice when you want taste. Also listen to what people are saying whenever you watch tv or play games. Give yourself goal to workout while you are doing lazy activities. I'm doing all of this right now myself because I put on some weight when I switched to a less active job with long hours. Cutting wings and pizza is the hardest for me but I always make sure to get one of them on Sunday! Best of luck!
 

Goron2000

best junior ever
This is great advice everyone, thank you for your responses. I tried running for the first time in my life late last year and I LOVED it, every single minute. Unfortunately it only lasted about a month before my knees and shins were crippled presumably due to my weight.

I have MyFitnessPal and I like using it (scanning barcodes is surprisingly cathartic) I struggle to keep on top of it and update every day.

I would like to keep leaving updates on my progress but don't want to keep bumping this thread, is there a thread for anything like that?
 
I have heard of the strategy of eating naked/shirtless in front of a mirror. I wonder how well such a strange tactic could work?
I feel like losing weight is mostly about getting in your own head and convincing yourself that there is no alternative. It's basically self fat-shaming. It worked for me and I lost almost 90 lbs.
 

low-G

Member
I think you're on the right track by throwing away your junk. Control your environment where you can, I say. That can be very difficult if your loved ones aren't supporting you 100% or you face snacks in the workplace (sounds like your case).

I lost 150 lbs, and the real trick was absolute dedication. I tend to be a black and white thinker, and when I was willing to dedicate myself to losing weight 100%, that really helped. Since you say you're also this way, use an online calorie calculator to make sure you don't starve yourself. Eat just above the minimum. Sometimes it affected my mood, but exercise is vitally helpful in that way. Also, I suggest doing something new and different and possibly scary on a pretty regular basis to keep yourself looking ahead.

For me, I have problems when I don't have enough reasons to maintain whatever level of fitness.

I'm not sure how to tell you how to FEEL about losing weight, but KNOW it's wonderful to be relatively thin, and KNOW you can do it, because I fuckin did.
 

Pedrito

Member
-Fix really small goals, like 2-3 pounds per month. If you're too ambitious, it's easy to feel discouraged and give up. 2-3 pounds ain't a lot, but at the end of the year it's 25-35 pounds. Think about it long term. Try to reach your goal weight over 3 years and not 6 months.
-Try calorie counting with myfitnesspal for a month. After a few weeks, you'll have a good idea of what you can eat in a day to be in calorie deficit. You'll discover that some of the things you eat and drink have a lot more calories than you thought. You'll also discover that you don't even have to do major changes to your diet. Just smaller portions and eating some things as a threat once in a while instead of regularly.
-Try to eliminate liquid calories. If you're addicted to soda, switch to diet. Try to reduce juice to a minimum and cut it half-half with water.
-Try to cook. Reduce restaurant and take-out to a minimum.
-Have a cheat day or at least a cheat meal. If you're too strict, it's easy to fall off the wagon. Instead, try to eat well and work hard monday-saturday, and eat whatever on sunday. You probably won't be all that hungry anyway and you won't want to destroy all the progress you've made.
-Exercise 3-4 times a week minimum. Start with walks and transition to other things like biking or jogging. Buy a cheap exercise bike and use it in front of the TV.
-Intermittent fasting (5-2) is a good way to cut calories and save time and money. It's surprisingly easy after the first few times. It's supposed to be good for the body, but the jury's still out.
 
This is great advice everyone, thank you for your responses. I tried running for the first time in my life late last year and I LOVED it, every single minute. Unfortunately it only lasted about a month before my knees and shins were crippled presumably due to my weight.

I have MyFitnessPal and I like using it (scanning barcodes is surprisingly cathartic) I struggle to keep on top of it and update every day.

I would like to keep leaving updates on my progress but don't want to keep bumping this thread, is there a thread for anything like that?
Here you go.

I agree with the guy who said go to your doctor and get a referral for a dietician.
 

Velcro Fly

Member
1. drink water. i'm sure this has been mentioned but it is important. it is ok once in a while to treat yourself and have a pop or a beer or something. but water is what you should be drinking. you have no idea how many empty calories and how much sugar is in stuff like pop or sports drinks.


2. start walking every day. i was almost 300 lbs when pokemon Heart Gold came out. I started taking the pokewalker with me everywhere and it got me to start exercising. just walking in the evenings 5-6 times per week. eventually i built up my stamina and would walk further and further. it is a silly thing but i think pokemon did quite a bit to save my life in this way.


3. find healthy foods that you enjoy and eat more of them instead of junk food. i love yogurt. i love carrots and a host of other veggies. healthy meals really aren't that much of a problem. it was snacking. once your body gets into a rhythm of eating at certain times it will become a lot easier to avoid bored eating, which i'm guessing is also a problem. a well balanced diet is also important. you still need grain and you still need meat. i'm talking actual chicken or beef and not processed meats.


4. once you start getting in shape from the healthier diet and the start of exercise, branch out a little bit. i have a basketball hoop at my house and i'd sometimes take a ball out and shoot some jumpers. if you have a bike that works well. i also own a treadmill that i'd use if it was especially hot or other bad weather. just do whatever feels good. also important to not overdo it. being patient and knowing your limits is important. a few times i got really sick and it just killed my stamina after not walking for a couple weeks. have to build back up to things.


5. remember that it is an ongoing process. there will be good days and bad days but do not get discouraged. even now that i'm at about 190-195 i still have days where i eat nothing but junk. it happens and no one is perfect. just remember to bounce back the next day and don't dwell on it.
 

Jopie

Member
I recently got a fitbit and it has been the best thing for me in losing weight. I put in a weight loss goal, and each day I track how many steps I have taken, and how many calories I can take in to stay on target. The best part is the social features. You can get into different contests to see who can walk most over a period of time. I dont have a lot of friends, but it turna out my boss has a fitbit too. We spent all weekend competing against each other and it was very motivating.
 
OP I went through the same thing. I was pushing 300 about 4 years ago and I'm just over 200 now. All I've done is change my diet but it wasn't easy. You just have to want to make a change and it'll happen. I believe in you OP.
 
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