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[Timedog]

Sounds like I am bragging... but yeah. I still haven't asked a girl out, I kind of want to - I don't think I'll have girls asking me out for the rest of my life, I need to get used to taking some initiative and I'd like to have more of a say with who I date .

Good job breh.

 

[Kad5]

Ok so I kind of want a lady's opinion on this. I'm just curious about this.

I couple nights ago I hung out with group of drunk people. I never met most of these people. One of the drunk girls started talking and flirting with me. She would also go out of the dorm room we were in and make out with random guys in the hall....yeah....

Later on when we were walking outside she held my hand and asked me if I was single and blah blah blah basically she was flirting.

Later on in the night we parted ways because my friend got alcohol poisoning.


All I told this girl was my first name (not even how to spell it, which is Kamran by the way pronounced cameron) and she added me on Facebook a day later.

I never thought I would see her again. I have no idea how she remembered my name if she was drunk and I have no idea how she knew how to spell it correctly to find me.

Fast forward to yesterday, I posted a clever status pointing to a profile leading to a "slut". The trick is that the profile automatically goes to the users own profile. The girl I met last night thought I was referring to her.

I'll just post our convo:


her:your status freaked me out because of last night. oh em gee.

Me:
oh haha sorry
i dont think your a slut btw

her:
awe, thanks! haha. yesterday was a bit crazy though..

Me:
it was. I'm sorry we met under those circumstances.

Her:
it's all good! i'm so so so glad we started walking back last night or else i probably would have been in trouble too
have you heard anything from the girl?

Me:
****? (this is the girl who got alcohol poisoning last night who was also my friend)

Her:
ehh yes

Me:
yea she had alcohol poisoning but shes ok now
shes getting kicked out of housing though
i feel really bad for her

Her:
omg damn. that's not good at all

Me:
she's fine though healthwise and that's all that truly matters

Her:
she shouldn't have gone out like that
that's very true
her parents mad?

Me:
yea but its no biggie they've gotten over it by now
they just cant trust her for awhile
i just kind of feel like a shitty friend i cant believe i let that happen to her....

Her:
it's not your fault though
the only thing, that we shouldn't have let her go out like that
that's the only thing

Her:
yeah...

Her:
oh well. i feel bad for like all of that happening last night, i was kind of drunk myself and i didn't know how bad it was until this morning

Me:
it'll be ok
it seemed like you had fun last night at least?

Her:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
yes...
hahaha

Me:
yeah i thought you were pretty funny actually (just to put things into perspective I saw her kissing a bunch of guys randomly in the hall at this moment)

Her:
haha thanks! i'm usually wayyyy more calmer than that lol
i'm actually pretty shy around people i don't know
i guess you didn't notice last night hahaha

Me:
I'm glad you weren't cuz you said hi to me at least.

Her:
hahahaha yup! well. the next time i'm at ga state we should hang out!
it wont be for a while though... haha

Me:
yeah i think we should too
hold on
********
thats my number
send me a text sometime :')

Her:
okie doke! i'll text you right now cause im actually about to get off haha



I think this is a good sign right...?

 

[keeblerdrow]

Blah

I think this is a good sign right...?

 

[shanshan310]

It is a good sign, but you guys still seem in the friendly acquaintance stage.

 

[MikeTyson]

better spice up those text messages with some clever shit

 

[BladeWorker]

Well, sure it's a good sign if you're looking to get laid.

If she made out with a bunch of guys on a single night while drunk she hasn't exactly demonstrated a command of sound judgement.

Wear a condom.

 

[brucewaynegretzky]

Well, sure it's a good sign if you're looking to get laid.

If she made out with a bunch of guys on a single night while drunk she hasn't exactly demonstrated a command of sound judgement.

Wear a condom.

The judgements... they're everywhere. Give the girl a break. I've seen plenty of virgins who will do things like this from time to time. She was having a good time. No harm no foul.

 

[Arjen]

Ok, i feel kinda weird getting advice from strangers, but i could really use an oustide look on my situation.
I've been friends with this girl for about 2 years now, we used to work together and spend a lot of time together that way. She was in a relationship for a while (7 years), so although there was always a bit of chemistry, i was cool with being friends, i hate being that guy that fucks up a relationship. She quit the job about half a year ago, but we still had a lot of contact.
Ok, so she broke up with her boyfriend a couple of months ago, and i've been trying to be there for here, comforting, trying to do fun things to keep her mind of all the shit going on in her life, during this time, we got a lot more touchy feely with eachother and kissed to.
I invited her for dinner, and she immediately said, she would sleep over then.
On the day we should've gone to dinner, she called me, and dropped the Friendzone bomb on me, it was brutal..things like: we should never spend time in the evenings together, we should go back to being just friends, she's not in love with me and never will be, there never will be anything more between us.
I was speechless really. I texted her that it was pretty hurtfull, and she apologized for hurting me. Thats the last contact we had (couple of days ago)
I'm pretty confused and hurt right now, and have really now idea what to do.

 

[Stylo]

The judgements... they're everywhere. Give the girl a break. I've seen plenty of virgins who will do things like this from time to time. She was having a good time. No harm no foul.

Better safe than sorry.

 

[Timedog]

What's the best way to get a girl to leave her boyfriend for a weekend of steamy sexual relations, and also to get her to start practicing Street Fighter 3 hours a day?

 

[Maddness]

What's the best way to get a girl to leave her boyfriend for a weekend of steamy sexual relations, and also to get her to start practicing Street Fighter 3 hours a day?

Team up with me in Halo. I think we can make it happen if we work together.

 

[Kinitari]

I got a date on Friday! Girl is way too Good looking for me. This one picked me up too (the girl from the college party was a bust, found out she has a boyfriend).

I don't know how i feel about every girl i see making the first move. Does that mean i suck at seduction?

 

[CrudeDiatribe]

I don't know how i feel about every girl i see making the first move. Does that mean i suck at seduction?

Or that you're very, very good at it despite your best efforts.

 

[BladeWorker]

I'm pretty confused and hurt right now, and have really now idea what to do.

Mourn for a bit - as you're doing - but then learn:

-Being the guy who comforts the girl who just broke up with her boyfriend is called being a good friend, not being a boyfriend-in-waiting. And often, being a friend to whom she clings and becomes dependent upon, at that.

-Two months is probably not enough time for her to have gotten over a 7-year relationship.

-Just because you have feelings for her and feel chemistry between you two does not mean she feels the same way.

It's okay to be hurt here. You invested a big part of yourself in this girl. But it's not what you thought, and eventually, you'll move on.

Do for yourself what you did for her: get busy, do things that take your mind off of her, try a few new things to expand your horizons or knock stuff off your bucket list. Along the way, you might meet new people who either are, or introduce you to, someone amazing who reciprocates your affections.

 

[BladeWorker]

The judgements... they're everywhere. Give the girl a break. I've seen plenty of virgins who will do things like this from time to time. She was having a good time. No harm no foul.

And I've seen plenty of girls who like to claim that "they're not usually like that" but if they actually stayed sober long enough to reflect, they'd realize that they were, indeed, usually like that.

As someone above said, better safe than sorry.

 

[brucewaynegretzky]

Ok, i feel kinda weird getting advice from strangers, but i could really use an oustide look on my situation.
I've been friends with this girl for about 2 years now, we used to work together and spend a lot of time together that way. She was in a relationship for a while (7 years), so although there was always a bit of chemistry, i was cool with being friends, i hate being that guy that fucks up a relationship. She quit the job about half a year ago, but we still had a lot of contact.
Ok, so she broke up with her boyfriend a couple of months ago, and i've been trying to be there for here, comforting, trying to do fun things to keep her mind of all the shit going on in her life, during this time, we got a lot more touchy feely with eachother and kissed to.
I invited her for dinner, and she immediately said, she would sleep over then.
On the day we should've gone to dinner, she called me, and dropped the Friendzone bomb on me, it was brutal..things like: we should never spend time in the evenings together, we should go back to being just friends, she's not in love with me and never will be, there never will be anything more between us.
I was speechless really. I texted her that it was pretty hurtfull, and she apologized for hurting me. Thats the last contact we had (couple of days ago)
I'm pretty confused and hurt right now, and have really now idea what to do.

To be honest it seems kinda like you were expecting something for your "effort." The whole mindset that things "should" work out because you think they should really irks me. I'm sure you two probably get along great, but did you really expect something worthwhile to start right after she ended a 7 year relationship? I'm kind of confused as to why you even made the move. It should have been pretty obvious if it was something she might be interested in if you were really spending that much time together. Tip: If a girl is talking about her ex with you she probably isn't interested in you. Would you talk about your ex with a girl you were interested in? You put her in a pretty shitty situation. She probably got freaked and wanted to bail out. No one wants to think that every single person they meet is only interested in them as a potential mate.

And I've seen plenty of girls who like to claim that "they're not usually like that" but if they actually stayed sober long enough to reflect, they'd realize that they were, indeed, usually like that.

As someone above said, better safe than sorry.

On the wearing a condom part sure. But when you say "It's good if you want to get laid" you're making a pretty unfair judgment. People place different values on things like making out or whatever. She may think that's no big deal, but isn't really a "slut" or whatever. Wear a condom to be safe all the time. Don't judge a girl's character on one drunk night.

 

[AdventureRacing]

Sounds like I am bragging... but yeah. I still haven't asked a girl out, I kind of want to - I don't think I'll have girls asking me out for the rest of my life, I need to get used to taking some initiative and I'd like to have more of a say with who I date .

I'm actually the same but i'm now in a long term relationship. I realise it's probably going to suck if i ever end up being single again but whatever the dating game has been pretty easy for me so far and i'll deal with it if it ever happens.

 

[theAntagonist]

If anyone, guy or girl, can shed some light on my situation or maybe give me some advice, I'd be super appreciative! I made this long post in the Girl/Dating AGE thread a few weeks ago seeking some advice, and since then a few different things have happened.

http://neogaf.net/forum/showpost.php?p=32789036&postcount=17383

Since that post, I've seen her a total of one time. We went out to eat together once before Thanksgiving. Since then, we've talked semi-irregularly through text. As it turns out, the mutual friend I mentioned seems to be a "drama queen" and is one to stir the pot so to speak. I found this out through another friend of mine, and it sucks because I had been confessing all of these things to this person when I probably shouldn't have been.

In the time since I had written that post and the last time me and this girl had hung out, I found out that she started taking Zoloft and was attempting to eliminate the mutual friend of ours from her life, so as to get past what had happened. But it seems like the two of them have 'rekindled' their friendship I guess and now the girl I have interest in has started to not talk to me again. I'm about to head home for Winter Break so I really want to see this girl in person, but all she keeps saying is "I'll let you know ".

I'm THIS CLOSE to just walking away on this whole thing, but I'm not sure if maybe I should just give her more time or what. In person she seems to like my company and she's told me that she definitely has interest, but then it seems like her actions contradict her words and it keeps me all confused.

There's more detail than what I've shed over these two posts, but I'll just see what you guys have to say first. If anyone wants more clarification I'll be happy to provide it.

 

[BladeWorker]

On the wearing a condom part sure. But when you say "It's good if you want to get laid" you're making a pretty unfair judgment. People place different values on things like making out or whatever. She may think that's no big deal, but isn't really a "slut" or whatever. Wear a condom to be safe all the time. Don't judge a girl's character on one drunk night.

I didn't call her a slut.

I said that her behaviour didn't exemplify sound judgement and that, if he's looking to get laid, the story that he's told us suggests she would be willing.

I don't think that's unfair at all. That's calling a spade a spade.

 

[shanshan310]

If anyone, guy or girl, can shed some light on my situation or maybe give me some advice, I'd be super appreciative! I made this long post in the Girl/Dating AGE thread a few weeks ago seeking some advice, and since then a few different things have happened.

http://neogaf.net/forum/showpost.php?p=32789036&postcount=17383

Since that post, I've seen her a total of one time. We went out to eat together once before Thanksgiving. Since then, we've talked semi-irregularly through text. As it turns out, the mutual friend I mentioned seems to be a "drama queen" and is one to stir the pot so to speak. I found this out through another friend of mine, and it sucks because I had been confessing all of these things to this person when I probably shouldn't have been.

In the time since I had written that post and the last time me and this girl had hung out, I found out that she started taking Zoloft and was attempting to eliminate the mutual friend of ours from her life, so as to get past what had happened. But it seems like the two of them have 'rekindled' their friendship I guess and now the girl I have interest in has started to not talk to me again. I'm about to head home for Winter Break so I really want to see this girl in person, but all she keeps saying is "I'll let you know ".

I'm THIS CLOSE to just walking away on this whole thing, but I'm not sure if maybe I should just give her more time or what. In person she seems to like my company and she's told me that she definitely has interest, but then it seems like her actions contradict her words and it keeps me all confused.

There's more detail than what I've shed over these two posts, but I'll just see what you guys have to say first. If anyone wants more clarification I'll be happy to provide it.

I think at this point you have nothing to lose by asking her out straight up. She seems to come with a lot of drama, but you also seem to like her a lot. So yeah, next time you see her I think you should ask her. Nothing will clear the confusion like that will.

 

[theAntagonist]

I think at this point you have nothing to lose by asking her out straight up. She seems to come with a lot of drama, but you also seem to like her a lot. So yeah, next time you see her I think you should ask her. Nothing will clear the confusion like that will.

Yeah this whole situation I'm in is loaded with drama unfortunately. I think that most of the drama is tied up with our mutual friend in that it seems like she was the one instigating their relationship, but then suggested her to hang out/hook up with me. The girl I'm interested in said she was going to ask me to hang out anyway, but still, it's all suspicious to me.

I actually did ask her what the relationship the two of us had, and all she told me was that we were "talking". I felt like that was sort of a bad sign, but that was almost two months ago now and at that point, we'd been seeing each other on a regular basis.

Then later on we had been texting each other one night, and she was like "I don't think I have the same feelings that you do. Our feelings towards each other are not mtutual. I do like you as a person but I honestly do not think it will work. I'm sorry if you're upset but I felt like I needed to say this." and followed that up with "Because you're more invested in the idea of a relationship with me than I am in a relationship at all." We've hung out since then though and she still seemed interested, but things have definitely slacked off. Supposedly it's 'not my fault' and I told her to be honest with me, yet she's continued to shirk me.

I can't tell if I'm just being used as a 'back up', if I'm friendzoned, she still has legitimate interest in me or what is going on. I feel like she has shown too much interest for it to be any of the former, yet she's been so reclusive/untalkative. Maybe it's all mindgames. I don't know.

If I see her again, I'm definitely going to be straight up about it and tell her I want a relationship, and I cannot keep waiting around for her. I just cannot be her friend, at least for awhile. Unless we start talking about things together in person we'll just have to part ways, as much as it sucks. Oh well, it's for the best.

Thanks for the reply!

 

[Arjen]

To be honest it seems kinda like you were expecting something for your "effort." The whole mindset that things "should" work out because you think they should really irks me. I'm sure you two probably get along great, but did you really expect something worthwhile to start right after she ended a 7 year relationship? I'm kind of confused as to why you even made the move. It should have been pretty obvious if it was something she might be interested in if you were really spending that much time together. Tip: If a girl is talking about her ex with you she probably isn't interested in you. Would you talk about your ex with a girl you were interested in? You put her in a pretty shitty situation. She probably got freaked and wanted to bail out. No one wants to think that every single person they meet is only interested in them as a potential mate.

I honestly wasn't expecting a relationship. I was well aware that jumping into that was not a good idea. After we kissed, we both decided that wasn't a good idea right now, and the next couple of times we met nothing happend, and i was totally ok with that. So i thought we were back on the right track(whatever track that might be)

Mourn for a bit - as you're doing - but then learn:

-Being the guy who comforts the girl who just broke up with her boyfriend is called being a good friend, not being a boyfriend-in-waiting. And often, being a friend to whom she clings and becomes dependent upon, at that.

-Two months is probably not enough time for her to have gotten over a 7-year relationship.

-Just because you have feelings for her and feel chemistry between you two does not mean she feels the same way.

It's okay to be hurt here. You invested a big part of yourself in this girl. But it's not what you thought, and eventually, you'll move on.

Do for yourself what you did for her: get busy, do things that take your mind off of her, try a few new things to expand your horizons or knock stuff off your bucket list. Along the way, you might meet new people who either are, or introduce you to, someone amazing who reciprocates your affections.

For the chemistry part, she told me a couple of times herself that there always was a bit of tension between us.

Thanks a lot for you reply's,
I had a talk with her yesterday where i got to explain my side of the coin, which she understood, and she was sorry she sent out mixed signals and that she was so harsh.
She's as great person who i really want to keep as a friend, so we both agreed we have to avoid these sort of confusions in the future.

 

[SRG01]

I've been on a couple of dates recently, and... yeah. I don't think I'm ready to be dating right now. I can make women laugh. I can flirt. But it seems really hollow.

It's frustrating because it's such a waste of emotional energy not being able to get over my ex. The breakup was mutual and amicable. We wanted different things. I want -- need -- to get over her. And yet, there's a large part of me that doesn't want to let her memory go.

I usually get over people with some sort of insight or realization... but it's not working this time.

 

[brucewaynegretzky]

I've been on a couple of dates recently, and... yeah. I don't think I'm ready to be dating right now. I can make women laugh. I can flirt. But it seems really hollow.

It's frustrating because it's such a waste of emotional energy not being able to get over my ex. The breakup was mutual and amicable. We wanted different things. I want -- need -- to get over her. And yet, there's a large part of me that doesn't want to let her memory go.

I usually get over people with some sort of insight or realization... but it's not working this time.

Right there with you. I actually know a few girls have been interested, but I'm really just not into it. Mine was a little less mutual, but yeah, I just feel like I can't find girls I'm as into. Also it's hard with looks. I used to wake up every day and think my girlfriend was drop dead gorgeous. Now if I see any girl I find slightly less attractive I just can't give them the attention they deserve. I know it's me, but I don't know how to fix it.

 

[SRG01]

I suppose if I got out more things would be different. The problem is that my social life contracted completely over the past six months because I found out that my friends weren't really my friends.

Also, my ex wasn't the most attractive person to other people, but she was gorgeous for me. She had a heart of gold.

 

[TheKaeptain]

What's the best way to get a girl to leave her boyfriend for a weekend of steamy sexual relations, and also to get her to start practicing Street Fighter 3 hours a day?

I don't know.


Also, why is it I am barely seeing this thread.

 

[Lissar]

I suppose if I got out more things would be different. The problem is that my social life contracted completely over the past six months because I found out that my friends weren't really my friends.

Also, my ex wasn't the most attractive person to other people, but she was gorgeous for me. She had a heart of gold.

Oh yeah, I've had that happen before. Of course, it happened when I was 12... which could be worse or not that big of a deal depending on your perspective. Considering I moved a year later, it wasn't a big deal. It was painful when it happened though. You start to question your worth as a person :/ So I'm right there with you.

It's hard/nigh impossible to MAKE a spark happen. I think it's a bit better to just keep trying and doing the things you enjoy, eventually you feel something and you just know it. You guys have had it happen before, you know what it feels like. I'm not saying be passive, but don't try to force it either.

 

[SRG01]

Oh yeah, I've had that happen before. Of course, it happened when I was 12... which could be worse or not that big of a deal depending on your perspective. Considering I moved a year later, it wasn't a big deal. It was painful when it happened though. You start to question your worth as a person :/ So I'm right there with you.

It's hard/nigh impossible to MAKE a spark happen. I think it's a bit better to just keep trying and doing the things you enjoy, eventually you feel something and you just know it. You guys have had it happen before, you know what it feels like. I'm not saying be passive, but don't try to force it either.

Well, the thing is that my self-esteem has never been higher. I'm good at what I do, I'm fairly good looking, I'm almost half-way through recording my album, and a whole lot of other things too. My problem that I really have no support system when it comes to personal problems, and having that support system is absolutely critical with a lifestyle like mine. Not that I had one before, but having people around still helped a bit.

Sparks are indeed difficult to find. In truth, I haven't had a true spark since, well, almost two years ago. I'm not sure if you can call what my ex and I had a spark. Perhaps attachment? Or perhaps trying to force a spark?

edit: I guess I'm also at a point where I'm fundamentally incompatible with most people I meet. I'm settled, perhaps too educated, and... One of my friends remarked a while back that having a Masters degree and teaching at a college is actually intimidating or a turn off to a lot of women.

 

[manipulate]

You're probably too serious dude. Lighten up broseph.

 

[SRG01]

You're probably too serious dude. Lighten up broseph.

LOL, yeah all my exes have said I have an intense personality, but only once they knew me over time. I'm kind of a lighthearted guy if everything is casual.

 

[Lissar]

edit: I guess I'm also at a point where I'm fundamentally incompatible with most people I meet. I'm settled, perhaps too educated, and... One of my friends remarked a while back that having a Masters degree and teaching at a college is actually intimidating or a turn off to a lot of women.

Education as a turn off!? D: I can't say that I've ever considered the idea... but then I'd probably run the opposite direction from any guy who considered education to be a turn off. Even if it left me with a significantly smaller group of people.

 

[manipulate]

Fair enough; you do come off as pretty intense and analytical in your posts

Edit: If you're so concerned about the education thing, just don't mention it (I mean, don't lie if you're asked, but don't go out of your way to mention it. Although the joke's on you if she's taking the same approach with regards to her various venereal diseases/children)

 

[SRG01]

Education as a turn off!? D: I can't say that I've ever considered the idea... but then I'd probably run the opposite direction from any guy who considered education to be a turn off. Even if it left me with a significantly smaller group of people.

Yeah, lets just say that most people out here aren't educated. It's ironic because we have a good university here with high enrollment.

Fair enough; you do come off as pretty intense and analytical in your posts

I should also say that I'm also pretty lighthearted when I don't care too... Which also makes me a really good flirt if I have no interest in the girl. It's a whole other story if I'm interested.

 

[manipulate]

I should also say that I'm also pretty lighthearted when I don't care too... Which also makes me a really good flirt if I have no interest in the girl. It's a whole other story if I'm interested.

STORY OF MY LIFE

 

[Lissar]

Yeah, lets just say that most people out here aren't educated. It's ironic because we have a good university here with high enrollment.

Is it a kind of school where students ditch the place on graduation? I think here a lot of people stay on in the city. I haven't run into many people who are against education (and as I mentioned in another thread, even our bums have degrees. We are kind of a sports university though, much to my dismay...) But that sounds terrible for trying to find people.

 

[SRG01]

Is it a kind of school where students ditch the place on graduation? I think here a lot of people stay on in the city. I haven't run into many people who are against education (and as I mentioned in another thread, even our bums have degrees. We are kind of a sports university though, much to my dismay...) But that sounds terrible for trying to find people.

Yeah. Not a lot of people stay here, when you can go to Vancouver or Toronto. I can't leave, because I'm taking care of my parents.

 

[BladeWorker]

Well, the thing is that my self-esteem has never been higher. I'm good at what I do, I'm fairly good looking, I'm almost half-way through recording my album, and a whole lot of other things too. My problem that I really have no support system when it comes to personal problems, and having that support system is absolutely critical with a lifestyle like mine. Not that I had one before, but having people around still helped a bit.

Sparks are indeed difficult to find. In truth, I haven't had a true spark since, well, almost two years ago. I'm not sure if you can call what my ex and I had a spark. Perhaps attachment? Or perhaps trying to force a spark?

edit: I guess I'm also at a point where I'm fundamentally incompatible with most people I meet. I'm settled, perhaps too educated, and... One of my friends remarked a while back that having a Masters degree and teaching at a college is actually intimidating or a turn off to a lot of women.

Okay maybe I'm a bit LTTP here, but it sounds to me like you're trying to analyze your way through a mourning period. Mourning periods are inherently emotional and you can't just think your way out of it. Ya gotta just feel it out. Meeting people will feel more natural once you're well and truly through it all.

As for education being a turn-off...it's not so much a turn-off as it is intimidating. For people who value smarts, good word-sex is incredibly hot. However, girls with half a brain (or more) want a guy who can keep up with them...but also with whom they can keep up. If you're off in dialectic-land and don't come down to earth from time to time to see the plebes (and no, I'm not accusing, I'm just talking in the hypothetical here) then you'll quickly find there are no more plebes with whom you can talk.

It's not about changing yourself, it's about changing how you approach people. Smart conversationalists and others who are your intellectual match will meet you word-for-word; others will get this deer-in-the-headlights look the moment you use a word bigger than "insight". And, looking in campus pubs are guaranteed to find you more of the latter than the former. As for where to find the former...well, I'm less helpful there. But I can keep an eye out for ya.

 

[SRG01]

Okay maybe I'm a bit LTTP here, but it sounds to me like you're trying to analyze your way through a mourning period. Mourning periods are inherently emotional and you can't just think your way out of it. Ya gotta just feel it out. Meeting people will feel more natural once you're well and truly through it all.

As for education being a turn-off...it's not so much a turn-off as it is intimidating. For people who value smarts, good word-sex is incredibly hot. However, girls with half a brain (or more) want a guy who can keep up with them...but also with whom they can keep up. If you're off in dialectic-land and don't come down to earth from time to time to see the plebes (and no, I'm not accusing, I'm just talking in the hypothetical here) then you'll quickly find there are no more plebes with whom you can talk.

It's not about changing yourself, it's about changing how you approach people. Smart conversationalists and others who are your intellectual match will meet you word-for-word; others will get this deer-in-the-headlights look the moment you use a word bigger than "insight". And, looking in campus pubs are guaranteed to find you more of the latter than the former. As for where to find the former...well, I'm less helpful there. But I can keep an eye out for ya.

LOL, it's ironic because I never used to analyze myself out of the "post-mortem" phase until now. There was a bunch of stuff I went through the past couple of years and I basically came out of it with the realization that much of it was such a waste of valuable emotional energy.

I do think my professional years has shaped how I approach people because, well, "sounding smart" is a part of my job. I don't like sounding smart, because it's a very forced version of myself. My ex was good for that, because I went back to my natural roots and wasn't "smart" around her. And she was never intimidated by my degrees or my job; it was just something that I did.

Hm. I think I just found another reason why letting go is so hard.

 

[SolidusDave]

Dear LadyGAF, when some of my female coworkers bump me with their boobs, is this done intentionally or am I just standing too close?

 

[Devolution]

Dear LadyGAF, when some of my female coworkers bump me with their boobs, is this done intentionally or am I just standing too close?

what.

 

[cloudwalking]

Dear LadyGAF, when some of my female coworkers bump me with their boobs, is this done intentionally or am I just standing too close?

unless your co-workers are all extremely well-endowed i'd venture to say that you should back the hell up

 

[kai3345]

Dear LadyGAF, when some of my female coworkers bump me with their boobs, is this done intentionally or am I just standing too close?

she wants you bro.

go for it

 

[SolidusDave]

what.

as in, boob-brushing my arm/back/shoulder etc.


I'm only half serious... but it would be nice to know this before our Christmas party


stealth-edit: yeah, not counting the one with extremely big cans, there I can understand the physics behind it.

real-edit: new page, now that is just great.

 

[Devolution]

as in, boob-brushing my arm/back/shoulder etc.


I'm only half serious... but it would be nice to know this before our Christmas party


stealth-edit: yeah, not counting the one with extremely big cans, there I can understand the physics behind it.

real-edit: new page, now that is just great.

Oh okay. When does it happen, in a hallway? Looking over your shoulder?

 

[Acid08]

What are ladies opinions on curly hair? My hair is ridiculously curly and its been really hard to find a decent style for it.

 

[SolidusDave]

Oh okay. When does it happen, in a hallway? Looking over your shoulder?

Kinda the latter I guess. But more often it's standing next to each other, e.g. to listen to a speech from someone, then the (friendly) female(s) in question turns, leading to the bump.

I just kinda wondered if women do this sometimes intentionally to tease guys or whatever. If you're not aware, then I wonder how any fragile chest-height-placed object is able to survive

 

[Devolution]

What are ladies opinions on curly hair? My hair is ridiculously curly and its been really hard to find a decent style for it.

Gonna have to be more specific. There's more than just one kind of curly.

Kinda the latter I guess. But more often it's standing next to each other, e.g. to listen to a speech from someone, then the (friendly) female(s) in question turns, leading to the bump.

I just kinda wondered if women do this sometimes intentionally to tease guys or whatever. If you're not aware, then I wonder how any fragile chest-height-placed object is able to survive

Well all I know at this point is I don't do it.

 

[FallingEdge]

Accidental rub is the best rub.

I remember back in high school, when I played basketball, I had to get my ankle taped. The trainer was a female and she propped my feet against her chest to wrap it up. Good times haha.

 

[Acid08]

Gonna have to be more specific. There's more than just one kind of curly.





Well all I know at this point is I don't do it.

More specific how? It's tight curls that don't hang. My hair tends to stick straight up on all sides, has to be really long for it to be weighed down enough to hang.

 

[Kinitari]

Bros, I think this is the first time I've really felt a spark with a girl. Just saying that makes me feel like I am being melodramatic, but I'm serious - out of the three previous girls I've been with (one being my ex of 7 years), I've never initially felt anything near this. The first kiss was amazing, I never used to like kisses because I thought they were kind of boring, but fuck... I was wrong, kisses are awesome.

I'm a little worried now though, because with the other girls I've recently been with, I think my sort of... aloof, not-too-invested attitude has been a bonus. With this girl... I have to fight like every desire in my body to constantly text her and talk to her, and the idea of fooling around with her makes me fucking nervous, because I find her not only intellectually attractive, but so physically attractive that it actually befuddles me when I talk to her.

I've only been on ONE date with this girl.

I'm trying to take some peoples advice and trying to calm the fuck down, hopefully I'll be able to. I'm seeing her again in a few days - she's housesitting for a friend and I am going to go over, and we're going to hang out in the area.

One thing she said to me that sort of... stood out, was she said I seemed so sincere, that my sort of awkward attempts at trying to conceal how into her I am was not only very flattering, but very charming. Does that make any sense GAF? I don't quite understand what she means, by being not-charming, I'm being charming?