Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
- Thread starter soultron
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And your age......?
Tweeting. Very important
Ah forgot, 28 years old
You're attracted to her, so go for it!
Holy shit. Congrats.
BronzeWolf
Banned
Ah forgot, 28 years old
Meh it's just the dick talking. Don't fall in love or something
Tweeting. Very important
hahaha thanks
smokeandmirrors
Banned
What is the opinion on flowers for someone you're not dating but casually talking to? Been talking to this girl for a while and I know there were feelings a while ago. We met back up and started talking again a couple months ago, and right before she went back to school we ended up on a what I guess could be construed as a casual date to an aquarium, which turned out great.
I know valentines day is coming up so I was thinking of just doing something nice like a bunch of colorful tulips (she goes to a school in the mountains), nothing too special but something to brighten her room and possibly her day. Dating gaf, is this a good idea? I'm finally getting away from the awkward penguin phase of relationships so I just want to be sure.
I know valentines day is coming up so I was thinking of just doing something nice like a bunch of colorful tulips (she goes to a school in the mountains), nothing too special but something to brighten her room and possibly her day. Dating gaf, is this a good idea? I'm finally getting away from the awkward penguin phase of relationships so I just want to be sure.
Dahellisdat
Member
Thanks....I will say, I feel like I got incredibly lucky. She was a gem out of a fairly slim choice of good prospects. It also helped that we were the same age and I coincidentally was friends with one of her friends' older sister. When I was on there it was totally free to use the site which was nice.
If you're thinking about signing up, I'd just say go for it. You never know when you're going to get lucky.
Something I can actually help with. I am dating a vegetarian. She lets me eat meat in front of her. Doesn't phase her at all. I have decided to stop eating meat in front of her. It should be interesting. Completely my choice though.
Yeah I'm inclined to agree with the other guys here. I had a girl outright say stuff you 'you turn me on' direct wishes to have sex, met her and she wasn't interested at all (we had skype video chatted a lot even).
So, internet is not reality.
BronzeWolf
Banned
I would never leave meat. ever
Houston3000
Member
This is totally true.
luckyboyceo
Member
Met this cool chick on campus today. Her arms were covered in tattoos and while I'm not usually into tats it sort of turned me on. We got to talking about them and she told me they were her "purity tattoos" representing her "abstinence from sex." Of course.
In other news, tonight I'm trying out that bible study with that girl I met last week. Should be interesting to say the least, but I'm looking forward to it. Will let you guys know how it goes.
In other news, tonight I'm trying out that bible study with that girl I met last week. Should be interesting to say the least, but I'm looking forward to it. Will let you guys know how it goes.
Analytical
Banned
Sounds like she was fucking with you
I'm with a vegan. I love my meats and she doesn't mind at all. She even cooks my dinner for me sometimes at home. It certainly shouldn't put you off, just go for it.
Bit of a dilemma that I'd like feedback on. Two friends of mine(guy/girl) pretty much told me to be patient and see how this is how it goes. They say I want a comment or at least a clear direction. I want to hear what GAF thinks though. Everyone here is very experienced and I want to try and correct my mindset if its needed.
About a month or two ago I started talking to this girl in college. Exchanged emails/#s and we talked on and off through the winter break. I mentioned at first that I was interested and she said she's focusing on school (pre-med, 2nd year), and that she rather be friends. I thought why not, I get to see how she is as a person. Last time I went this route, I realized how wrong that person was for me, which is good. To be honest, I'm bored and just losing interest. She's great from the times we talked, the kinda girl you would bring home you know? but I need more than just the occasional email or phone call.
I'm 21, young and I feel like I shouldn't have to be patient, at least in this sense. There are many other girls out there, so why get hanged up you know? But I'm here GAF, young and inexperienced. Talk some sense into me if I'm wrong, I'm honestly open to whatever suggestions.
About a month or two ago I started talking to this girl in college. Exchanged emails/#s and we talked on and off through the winter break. I mentioned at first that I was interested and she said she's focusing on school (pre-med, 2nd year), and that she rather be friends. I thought why not, I get to see how she is as a person. Last time I went this route, I realized how wrong that person was for me, which is good. To be honest, I'm bored and just losing interest. She's great from the times we talked, the kinda girl you would bring home you know? but I need more than just the occasional email or phone call.
I'm 21, young and I feel like I shouldn't have to be patient, at least in this sense. There are many other girls out there, so why get hanged up you know? But I'm here GAF, young and inexperienced. Talk some sense into me if I'm wrong, I'm honestly open to whatever suggestions.
BronzeWolf
Banned
What is your question exactly?
I guess, be patient and keep talking to her despite the fact that she rather be friends at the moment or just move on?
luckyboyceo
Member
Man, I wish that was the case. Unfortunately, I go to an extremely religious college so these things are sort of the norm.
BronzeWolf
Banned
You were friendzoned. Don't like her as a friend? bail out, she is just a friend after all. Next time don't express your feelings without evidence that she is interested.
Time won't make you sexually attractive
Drealmcc0y
Banned
What a dumb comment.
BronzeWolf
Banned
How many times:
"I've been friends with this girl for 4 years and she won't love me back! *sob*"
?
It's not a dumb comment, stfu and get out
PflargBlarg
Member
It's not a dumb comment. Is it your experience that it's common for a guy to ask a girl out, she's not interested, and then suddenly 3 years later she is? Doesn't really happen very often.
Did you ever go on a date with her or anything? Just curious.
BronzeWolf
Banned
You make moves you see interest back in form of body language basically. You just don't go to them tell them "Look I like you!". You make the move, and she is not interested, no big deal, can still be friendzors if you like
luckyboyceo
Member
I don't get where the confusion is here. You want to be more than friends, she doesn't. End of story.
I don't see you making her change her mind so if you can't handle just being friends, then don't be.
Odd things keep happening. First this milf from the other week sends another friend request (removed the first one without giving an answer). Then two girls start talking with me on facebook about getting "semlor" together (one of them single, the other one engaged). Then completely out of the blue a freshman student, with a boyfriend, contacts me and tells me she's been having dreams about me where I'm mean to her, and not just once either apparently. I mean, come on, what's going on? xD Life can be strange sometimes.
Khalifa Jayy
Banned
Waves man... waves.
This is true. Just the other day I was kind of down on myself for not having a girl (as many know, I'm used to being in a relationship, and not being in one, puts me out of wack). And then bam, low and behold, I meet this really cool girl. Things are looking up and much better now, and I didn't even expect it.
Hahaha... This may be the first time on here I've been made self aware of my age (27) by a message I received from a 21 yr old I messaged.
Had asked her about photography and made mention of my random bouts of pretending to be a photographer (I made it un-self-depricating) as well as asked her what she was up to, hence the watching tv comment.
But "hey daddy:]" made me laugh... I think I'm officially at the age where messaging a 21 yr old starts to at least on the surface appear creepy. No matter, gonna think of a response to play off of the daddy comment and send it in a bit.
Had asked her about photography and made mention of my random bouts of pretending to be a photographer (I made it un-self-depricating) as well as asked her what she was up to, hence the watching tv comment.
But "hey daddy:]" made me laugh... I think I'm officially at the age where messaging a 21 yr old starts to at least on the surface appear creepy. No matter, gonna think of a response to play off of the daddy comment and send it in a bit.
SMT
this show is not Breaking Bad why is it not Breaking Bad? it should be Breaking Bad dammit Breaking Bad
Hey daddy? What the hell? Maybe she wants a sugar daddy, and knows you probably have a better job than her due to your age.
There's a ton of girls like that on craigslist and Kijiji, and even on the dating sites, makes me cringe.
It all boils down to her wanting $$, I know girls my age going out with older guys, and find them to be more attractive.
But she's talking to you, so you do not equal creep, she has a loose tongue though.
ConradCervantes
Banned
ConradCervantes
Banned
Yeah, my last girlfriend is nine years older than me, so we often poked fun at how old or young the other was. Never any malice behind it. Good times.
NihonTiger90
Member
Yeah, I think it's probably nothing too terrible. Go ahead and play off it, Migs
As for me, well, not much going on lately. I've made an effort, but things have been rather quiet, so I'm not expecting too much. Just gonna keep plugging ahead and be the best I can.
Case in point: Yesterday, I messaged a girl I thought was interesting and lived close by. Wrote a catchy, interesting and tailored message and the only thing I got was a profile view. Ugh.
It really is frustrating; online dating is less about communication and more about selling yourself as being Jesus Christ reincarnated. It's basically a job hunt in a shit economy, but for relationships instead of work.
Guys I need help. I seem to notice a very apparent trend that's been going on with my gf and I. Whenever we talk, it always ends up as me staring at her while she tells me every single detail that happened in her day, and other random stories. She literally speaks 85% of the time, and barely allows me to control the conversation, its always her dictating it. Of course some of the things she says I really don't care for but I pretend to be interested, I laugh, make some small comments and that's it. I feel like she's not really interested in me, but more interested in just having someone to talk to/vent about whatever happened in their day.
It's also partially my fault, because I allow her to go on and on and on. A lot of times she'll ask me how my day was and I'll just reply, "it was good" and that's pretty much it. So she pretty much stopped asking me because I have little to say and now all she'll do is go through a laundry list of things that happened to her while I listen.
And what really bothers me is that she made it apparent she didn't go out with me for my looks. And it's obvious she doesn't care for my lack of personality, because she does all the talking. So then is it because I drive her around and pay for a lot things?
Anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?
It's also partially my fault, because I allow her to go on and on and on. A lot of times she'll ask me how my day was and I'll just reply, "it was good" and that's pretty much it. So she pretty much stopped asking me because I have little to say and now all she'll do is go through a laundry list of things that happened to her while I listen.
And what really bothers me is that she made it apparent she didn't go out with me for my looks. And it's obvious she doesn't care for my lack of personality, because she does all the talking. So then is it because I drive her around and pay for a lot things?
Anyone have any advice on how to deal with this?
That doesn't sound like a very healthy situation. Whatever you do, do not let any kind of resentment build up, because it will end badly. Talk with her about how you're feeling. Have a civilized discussion about it. Vent to HER. Open up. she might not realize it, but it sounds like she is incredibly selfish, and it sounds like you have set the precedent of not being open with her.
I met this girl over the weekend and hooked up her at my buddy's ski trip, and we had a great weekend together. When we parted ways, we kissed and she told me thanks for the lovely weekend.
On monday morning I texted her to get ice cream this week, no response. This was kind of weird; I only texted and not called because I just met her and didn't know her college schedule. Obviously now I realize my mistake, and should have called from the get go.
This isn't high school and I was tired of waiting for a response, so tonight (Tuesday night) I said fuck it and just called her and asked her out to lunch, giving two days, Saturday and Tuesday. She said she thinks she was doing something on Saturday, not mentioning anything about Tuesday. Then she was said, "thank you though, and I'll get back to you" awkwardly. Then I lightheartedly joked with her a bit on the phone, but she didn't play back like she did this weekend. The outcome is not looking good for this one, but on the bright side I now know that the door is likely closed and I can now stop wasting my time.
Also, I had a great conversation today with a girl in one of my classes. She asked me for my Facebook, and seemed really interested, so we'll see where that goes.
On monday morning I texted her to get ice cream this week, no response. This was kind of weird; I only texted and not called because I just met her and didn't know her college schedule. Obviously now I realize my mistake, and should have called from the get go.
This isn't high school and I was tired of waiting for a response, so tonight (Tuesday night) I said fuck it and just called her and asked her out to lunch, giving two days, Saturday and Tuesday. She said she thinks she was doing something on Saturday, not mentioning anything about Tuesday. Then she was said, "thank you though, and I'll get back to you" awkwardly. Then I lightheartedly joked with her a bit on the phone, but she didn't play back like she did this weekend. The outcome is not looking good for this one, but on the bright side I now know that the door is likely closed and I can now stop wasting my time.
Also, I had a great conversation today with a girl in one of my classes. She asked me for my Facebook, and seemed really interested, so we'll see where that goes.
BronzeWolf
Banned
Oh fuck, shit is transpiring! OMFG
Bucket-o-roadkill
Member
I'd say be wary to guys reading this thinking I'm gonna do it and find my soul mate too! it rarely has a fairy tale ending like this. My experience of online dating started well too, but then went completely the other way and pretty much shattered my soul into a million pieces. its a mine field and has left me bitter and just broken really. I'm in a much worse place than I was before trying online dating. Wish I never signed up in the first place to be honest. who ever said 'its better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all' is so wrong.. ignorance is bliss! lol
SlipperySlope
Banned
Got stood up :/
BronzeWolf
Banned
big time, as in no show, or called 5 minutes before to cancel?
SlipperySlope
Banned
No call, no text, no nothing. Story of my life.
BronzeWolf
Banned
Ahhhh to the fucking hell with her. That is a basic lack of respect. So here is what you are going to do.
You are not to reprimand her, remind her of your date or otherwise mention it. I don't know the details, but if you work/study close to her, keep a sunny but distant disposition around her. If she doesn't bring the issue, she fucking sucks ass and you move on. If she brings the issue on her own, apologizes and suggests another date, she is off the hook. If she brings the issue apologizes but doesn't set another date she is not interested, move on. If she brings the issue and does not apologize, be sure to point the lack of respect she shows by not doing that and move on, even if she suggests another date. If she asks what you did instead, answer "oh, I just went hang out with my dudes to [x] (fun) place" even if it's not true
Jerk
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