I mean almost Independence Day 2012, in a few hours.
Let's discuss once again the cornerstones of what the founding fathers decreed to make this country great. A quick summary:
When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to remember the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth the self-evident awesomeness of firework celebrations, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare precisely how rad they can be.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all hamburgers, hotdogs and other grill-related items taste better on July 4, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable deliciousness, that among these are grease, high caloric intake and smokin' vittles of all kinds.
But when a long train of abuses and shitty cooking, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute culinary despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such party crashers, and to provide new guards for their future celebrations.
Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in this history of mankind.
Mankind -- that word should have new meaning for all of us today.
We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore.
We will be united in our common interests.
Perhaps its fate that today is the 4th of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom, not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution -- but from annihilation.
We're fighting for our right to live, to exist.
And should we win the day, the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice:
We're also the best at being modest. That's how awesome we are. We are sorry you're not as awesome as us. It's hard to keep up with:
We're so awesome our national anthem is audible sex.
Also don't try and cross us or we'll kick your ass! YEE HAW!
------------------------------THE REAL OP---------------------------------------
It's been a long 236 years. America has changed a lot. But we have a long way to go. Trust us, Americans know that better than anyone. But that's what can be so great about America, we will eventually get it right.
We've gone from
and
to
And I'm damn proud of that. Yes we know, we're behind on some stuff (the list can be kind of long, so it won't be mentioned here). But we're a big ship, it takes us a while to turn. Be patient with us.
The first part of this was of course a joke, but I really do love this country. There is a lot of the American dream left. It's not dead. Millions enter our country to find a better life and many do find it. I've seen it with my own eyes. We have amazing rights here that I use and am thankful for everyday. We have a great culture that really is a mixing pot, that's what makes it so great. Nothing quite like it in the rest of the world.
Use July 4th America to put aside your political and religious beliefs just this one day and be thankful for what you have. We have a great nation with a bright future.
Celebrate America here! How are you doing it on the 4th?
oh...I didn't think to look in that topic because I didn't think people called topics like this... thought that was reserved for games and movies more often than not. Sorry man, if the mods like you can put yours up and close this one. It's no big
I wasn't sure if it was kosher. I don't mind lol. Can't have too much patriotism! I just wish I would have refreshed OT one more time before I submitted it and now I look silly.
