What would you wish upon someone who hasn't had sex? Should they feel bad about themselves? Should they be like that person several replies up, and actually contemplate suicide? What exactly is your aim?
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Virgin tight?
- Thread starter FortunateSon
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What would you wish upon someone who hasn't had sex? Should they feel bad about themselves? Should they be like that person several replies up, and actually contemplate suicide? What exactly is your aim?
Everyone wants sex. But it should be characterized as a want, not a need. You can live without sex.
You say you aren't a virgin anymore. Don't you remember walking on sunshine the next day?
In the end though, it doesn't matter and after a few days you realize pre to post virginity means jackshit, but you cannot deny that the first time warrants some kind of "Achievement unlocked" for awesomeness.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
I dont know why you keep talking about rape. Obviously this thread and my posts were about consensual sex. Your just dramatising things.
What question did i dodge?
MWS Natural
Member
You can only choose ONE!
FortunateSon
Banned
If I were to tell you. You wouldn't believe me. It was honestly, just bleh. It wasn't anything special to rave about. OMG GUYYZZ, I HAD SEX, ACHIEVEMENT ACHIEVED <-- It's fucking childish behavior at best. We ain't a bunch of 15 years old in here, lets act like adults huh?
First time is some sort of achievement for awesomeness? Really now.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
Your doing it wrong.
I hate to break it to you, but culturally, you are an outlier on this one, and you have to admit that.
Your experience of "bleh" maybe comes from all those irrational fears you listed (religion, diseases), and that is your emotional baggage. I am sure, if we polled young men who lost their virginity, they would agree with what I said, rather than get on some kind of "sex isn't that great or important" high horse.
hmmm, either this statement is wrong or some people in this thread are total shitheads....
Ok...
I totally agree with you.
But that isn't really what we are talking about or what is going on either, so I don't know how you can interpret it that way...
This whole discussion has a weird overcharged tension and I am going to bail out before things get too ugly.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
In my experience its the opposite. Theres people who I went to school with in their 20's now who havent kissed a girl let alone fuck one. They catch alot of shit. I dont get involved personally but its simply how the world is.
No, I don't think your experience is indicative of the norm. People who mind others' sex lives are usually somehow involved or friends with the person who is involved.
Adults don't go out of their way to find virgins and mess with them.
There isn't always a reason for it though. Just like gays develop a sexual attraction to their same sex rather than the opposite sex, some people don't develop sexual attraction to anyone. There's nothing wrong with them.
There are people who are asexual or celibate for personal reasons like you said, but that's not what I'm talking about.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
Co-sign. Im out.
I swear, when I found out a friend of mine was a virgin my jaw nearly dropped to the floor.
He's 25 years old, and looks like a freakin underwear model. Buldging muscles, 8 pack abs, tan kissed skin, and has fabio esque hair. Great fashion taste as well, and has a really awesome and likable personality. Seriously, he's the total package.
I mean, I'm not gay, but I'm not afraid to admit that he's freakin gorgeous, and to hear that he hadn't had sex yet really made me feel better about myself. For some reason I always thought it was the poor looking guys who always had the short end of the stick in terms of losing the v-card, but I guess good looking dudes go through similar struggles as well.
He's 25 years old, and looks like a freakin underwear model. Buldging muscles, 8 pack abs, tan kissed skin, and has fabio esque hair. Great fashion taste as well, and has a really awesome and likable personality. Seriously, he's the total package.
I mean, I'm not gay, but I'm not afraid to admit that he's freakin gorgeous, and to hear that he hadn't had sex yet really made me feel better about myself. For some reason I always thought it was the poor looking guys who always had the short end of the stick in terms of losing the v-card, but I guess good looking dudes go through similar struggles as well.
There is absolutely no reason to not be forthcoming about your virginity. If anyone gives you grief for it, there are underlying issues with that person.
It is a lifestyle choice, and no one has the same lifestyle.
I lost mine when I was 21, in a hurry to just get it done, and it was with a girl I stopped speaking to ~6 months later. Little did I know that had I waited a little longer, I would have had many more opportunities with people I actually cared about, because I was finally living on my own without a roommate and in a big city meeting a lot of new people.
It makes me really pissed off to see people judge someone for being a virgin in their twenties. It's not an age thing, it is a LIFESTYLE THING.
It is a lifestyle choice, and no one has the same lifestyle.
I lost mine when I was 21, in a hurry to just get it done, and it was with a girl I stopped speaking to ~6 months later. Little did I know that had I waited a little longer, I would have had many more opportunities with people I actually cared about, because I was finally living on my own without a roommate and in a big city meeting a lot of new people.
It makes me really pissed off to see people judge someone for being a virgin in their twenties. It's not an age thing, it is a LIFESTYLE THING.
I don't think people should be 'chastised' for being virgins. I think they should be scoffed at for suggesting that sex isn't important to humans though.
Doesn't it just. Kinda telling.
If you've ever seen some of the posters in the dating thread post pics of themselves, you would see that all of them are either above average or look great. But then you read their posts and realize its the things they experience that gets them to the point they are, not necessarily looks.
Should people be scoffed at for creating composite users from random posts?
send him my way! i can help him with that.
I only brought it up because many simply think it's just a physical act that's what sets you up as someone who "accomplished" something of note. If that is indeed the case, then instances of rape qualify too, surely.
It's still around that age many people still act childish about such things, they hold all the little things so highly. I'm not going to claim I'm "smarter" than that because here I am, arguing with people who think that way (not you per se, but the theme in general), but one of the reasons I simply don't see it as a big deal is because I often wonder about death. I often feel like I will die, very soon. When I think that way, the minor shit literally melts away. I don't feel bad for everything I lack, but it gives me a drive to want to do the things I find meaningful and matter to me. I get very irritated when there are people who go out of their way to mock and shame those who may feel what they're being shamed about isn't on their to-do list, you know? And that tends to happen a lot with sexual activity towards males. Sure, some simply struggle getting there, but there are others who simply don't really care about it, but they're mocked anyway. I find that troubling. I'd rather be mocked for my true failures than the superficial ones.
Did I miss the bit where you called out the specific people chastising virgins?
I thought it was a given that we were speaking in generalisations.
FortunateSon
Banned
Okay. That was a great post.
Dude. You don't have to break anything to me. You don't know anymore than I do. So culturally it's an achievement to have sex? What? You know how fucking stupid that sounds?
The reason it was "bleh", I just felt I rushed it more or less. I just wanted it to get it out of the way and we just did it. Now, the sex after the first few times were definitely great. Yeah, lets poll some young men and get their insights if it's an achievement to have lost your virginity (first time) or whatever. It really isn't a big deal. None of us know the real outcome so get the poll rolling. I'd love to see the results though. It ain't an achievement. As I said, an achievement to some could be to have sex, while to others, it may be something completely different.
I could also reverse and say a lot of people in this thread are on some "you have to have sex, it's part of life, sex is the greatest thing ever" high horse. Weird huh?
Well, at any rate, I think sex is perfectly normal, natural part of life that people find extremely important on the whole.
My posts are mainly aimed at Enter the 36 Chambers and his schoolyard mentality.
Bam Bam Baklava
Member
You don't understand bro, you don't get full achievement points if you cheat like that.
Me_Marcadet
Member
Being good looking doesn't mean anything if you don't get the motivation to be with a girl.
I'm 26 and I never have been in a relationship with a woman and never wanted to ask one to be with me. It's weird because I'm pretty good looking, in great shape, I have friends, I have a job and my own place since I'm 21 but I think the whole dating thing is a waste of time and I'd rather do other things whom I will enjoy or who would improve myself.
Well now I'm starting to want a family and I'm thinking about starting the whole dating thing but I need to sort some things out in my life before like getting a driver license and moving to a better place.
The sole advantage of my situation is I'm pretty confident I could get laid as soon as I really want to but it's not my goal. I know I couldn't enjoy sex without having a big crush on a girl and it never happened yet. Being picky and not meeting a lot of them didn't really help speeding the process.
Once again, you speak sense to me. When I end up in a committed relationship with a woman I truly care about, I'm looking forward to experiencing and exploring sex and everything that comes with it and I'm going to try to make sure that we have a healthy and happy sex life.
It's not going to be my main priority though, as I think there are plenty more important aspects to relationships, but I agree that it is important in its own right.
IdreamofHIME
Member
Threads like this always make me sad when i realize GAF is full of teen's and kids.
I just strongly disagreed with you. The enormous pressure from society will instill a feel of achievement to losing your virginity.
Typographenia
Member
All of my family and my two good friends know I'm a virgin, but it doesn't matter to me. If everyone in the world knew, I wouldn't care.
The only person outside of them that knows was the only girl that was almost a girlfriend, and she decided she wanted to call off the possibility of us dating about two or three days after I told her. That probably wasn't the reason, but yeah.
I'm 24, by the way.
Edit: that's not quite right. Another guy I know knows I'm a virgin, since he kept asking me about that girl and how many girlfriends I had up to that point. He still gives me grief once in a while that I need a girlfriend, but not in a mean way or anything.
The only person outside of them that knows was the only girl that was almost a girlfriend, and she decided she wanted to call off the possibility of us dating about two or three days after I told her. That probably wasn't the reason, but yeah.
I'm 24, by the way.
Edit: that's not quite right. Another guy I know knows I'm a virgin, since he kept asking me about that girl and how many girlfriends I had up to that point. He still gives me grief once in a while that I need a girlfriend, but not in a mean way or anything.
NinjaBoiX
Member
I'm pretty sure this is just you.
I know when I popped my cherry, I was all like:
I'm kind of disappointed by how close-minded some members of GAF are.
I lost my virginity at a very young age and I honestly think it did me more harm than good...
Who cares if someone is a virgin, honestly? It's not like you're going to die if you don't have sex.
Not to mention adults are perfectly capable of losing their virginity whenever they want, really. If you've got some extra cash on hand it's not exactly difficult to find an escort.
I lost my virginity at a very young age and I honestly think it did me more harm than good...
Who cares if someone is a virgin, honestly? It's not like you're going to die if you don't have sex.
Not to mention adults are perfectly capable of losing their virginity whenever they want, really. If you've got some extra cash on hand it's not exactly difficult to find an escort.
That's the impression I get sometimes, too. How immature do you have to be to care about whether or not someone is a virgin? I'd like to think we aren't in high school anymore.
ThoseDeafMutes
Member
Some people in this thread are total shitheads.
NinjaBoiX
Member
I'm not sure that's fair. Sometimes, it's an entirely relevant question.
I guess you'd have to me pretty immature to chastise someone for it though.
NinjaBoiX
Member
That seems like a well-balanced outlook and I hope it serves you well. You're right about it not being the most important aspect, you can't sustain a relationship on sex alone (well, not for long anyway).
Calling out a specific individual for being a virgin is immature. Suggesting that forming sexual relationships can be important to the happiness of people in general is not.
I think the discussion is of 'high-school' level because that's when many people lose their virginity. I haven't had a conversation like this in about 15 years.
My thoughts exactly.
TUROK
Member
No, we won't die, but we might feel like people who aren't good enough to attract the people we're attracted to. Not having sex may be fine to some, but it does serious psychological damage to others.
Vermillion
Banned
And so we learn again that NeoGAF is a roadblock to self-improvement...
Napoleonthechimp
Member
Damn. If only had that choice when I was young.You can only choose ONE!
But being a fatty as i was back then I'd end up putting the chocolate cake on an equal footing with the woman.
You can only choose ONE!
All over my face.
dat Gameboy.
encephalon
Member
This sounds like a pretty dangerous hint
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