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[Chittagong]

I should have slapped together a report on last year's, which was nearly as garish. You can bet I'll be there this year..

What happened last year then? I remember horrible AV problems, but I think the Funky Bunch wasn't invited anymore.

 

[Teddman]

What happened last year then? I remember horrible AV problems, but I think the Funky Bunch wasn't invited anymore.

Here are some of the highlights, culled from my posts on the forum last year:

I actually attended Nokia's E3 press conference (nice open bar, near eFocus too) and they were really hyping up Pathway to Glory. Got a nice cameoflage logo backpack giveaway.

One of the unintentionally funny moments in the presentation involved them showing how they used real-world references for the buildings in the game: they'd show live action footage of a huge WWII style bunker, and then disolve to in-game footage of the little sprite equivalents. Ditto for the war costumes, weapons, vehicles, etc. How much of this detail is going to show on a little N-Gage screen, I wondered?

The game played alright at the press conference for the few minutes I picked it up. Struck me as a more realistic version of Cannon Fodder. Don't know if I'd buy an N-Gage for it though...

You forgot, the N-Gage has RIFTS.

In the words of the Nokia exec at their press conference (thick, thick Swedish accent): "We have upcoming a popular RPG game that all you fans of RPG's surely know about. Game is called RRRRRIFTS!!"

[crickets]

"RIFTS! Can you start the video clip please?"

I really should get around to writing a little humor piece about this year's N-Gage E3 press conference. Was anyone else there? They are SO worth attending for all the wrong reasons. God, the Nokia execs try so hard but they have got to get someone else to do the talking for them onstage.

The intro to the Rifts demo clip was especially hilarious. "All of you RPG fanz have heard of this game, is very popular game... Game is called RRRRIFTS! RRRRIFTS!"

[utterly incomprehensible CG clip follows, showing zero in-game footage. Basically, a robot runs down a hallway into an arena and shoots lazers at a girl floating, sitting cross-legged in the air. The robot's shots bounce off a force field that appears around her, then she shoots an even bigger lazer beam out of the middle of her head or her mouth, can't remember which, destroying the robot. End.]

Audience: WTF was that?

The Nokia execs have such thick accents, it makes the N-Gage an even harder sell during a shakey press conference. I appreciate that they try to be hands-on, but they really need a Reggie-type guy to do all of that for them. One of the Nokia guys had this weird habit of saying "ee-ah" where you or I might say "um" during a pause in a sentence. So you got: "We have ee-ah many new games ee-ah exciting games this coming to N-gage ee-ah. One of the most anticipated ee-ah is Pathway to Glory ee-ah, a realtime war simulation ee-ah..." You get the picture.

Last year's conference took place way downtown in an office building, where they had a circular stage surrounded by chairs, an open bar, and demo units on one side. It was definitely an improvement over 2003, but they still have a ways to go... I'm interested to see how things fare this year.