I'm kind of in the same spot due to social anxiety. I've worked in retail since graduating high school, and it's helped immensely with dealing with social interactions, but I still have yet to really get over it. I've been unemployed since February and the anxiety (and issues with depression) definitely makes it difficult to job search. It doesn't help that I was just turned down by the art university I applied to, making me feel discouraged and unsure what I really want to do.
anyone else unemployed?
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ajim
Member
Whilst I admire your post and I understand what you're trying to say with it, it is a very real different mindset you're dealing with with people who have depression and anxiety.Unemployed for awhile (mostly by choice - trying to make money/ get enough steady work as an independent agent) but it's tough. Been a long enough time now that I am tired of scraping by month-to-month and it's taking a toll on my relationship/stamina/etc. I know my work/ethic/etc is good so only a matter of time, though I will keep pursuing independent as well.
To those of you who are young and unemployed, and therefore not confident/broke/can't get a chick/etc - yeah, it is tough, and it kinda breaks my heart to hear people saying "suicidal thoughts" and such but come on. Yes, jumping into "the real world" cam be dramatic, frustrating, frightening, and overall very unsatisfying as it is and especially these days when competition is fierce and good jobs/benefits etc are particularly difficult to get or hold onto. But honestly if you are young, you really have got to pay your dues. Work for shitty pay, be single for awhile, maybe be a bit directionless for a few years. Going from the relatively rock-solid structure if a steady curriculum into the unstable "anything goes" real world is mind-blowing (in both good and bad ways), and in some ways the current gen of new folks just entering the workforce maybe a bit ill-prepared to enter it (the coddled generation). Screw that, you guys are also the most tech-savvy generation and you should therefore be more adaptive/resourceful than the previous ones.
Anyway, save the bellyaching. No one said it would be easy (well they dud, but they lied) growing up is a bitch but it's a universal truth anyway. If you're young and inexperienced, you have everything ahead of you and all you can do is just eat it for a couple of years. Seek out done work which might not be what you wanna do for the long term, and maybe not in the place you'd most ideally like to live, but it will give you job experience, life experience, social experience, and absolutely expose you to people and things that you may never otherwise cross paths with. Remember, it may suck and you may hate it after a short time - and for awhile - but it will occupy you and perhaps give you that solid direction and stability which might otherwise be missing from your life. Most importantly, you do not have to stay there and you will be able to move on to bigger and better things for certain. It's totally up to you, as it should be.
More money, more satisfying career choices, girlfriend/etc, better apartment will all follow in due timeSpend your time wisely and don't get so hung up on how things "just suck so bad and aren't fair." After all, you owe it to yourself to put in the tine and energy, after all it is your life, right?
It's not that they're just 'scared' of feel 'disheartened', they literally find it 'impossible' to make those extra steps. Have you ever felt like you weren't in control of your mind, or your body, like it was doing all the thinking (negative at that) for you? Well, thats what someone who is dealing with depression/anxiety goes through on a daily basis.
You literally feel 'trapped' in your own mind, unable to break out and make any progress.
However, yes, being forced (doing it yourself) into those situations is the real treatment, and it has worked for myself (and continuing to do so), it's being able to make that initial step that is the most difficult.
I really feel for anyone who has been in the same position as me, because it is a vicious cycle that feels like a constant downward spiral that is 100% out of your control.
I just hope the people in here can make those steps and see some self improvement and normality.
Vicetrailia
Banned
You know, the interesting stuff that my mom is going through cements in my memory: No one wants to live off of the government.
They are so slow and do the craziest shit. And worse of all, when the government messes u, that means you aren't eating, that means you are suddenly in a life or death situation. The term "welfare queens" barely stretches.
They are so slow and do the craziest shit. And worse of all, when the government messes u, that means you aren't eating, that means you are suddenly in a life or death situation. The term "welfare queens" barely stretches.
viewtifulsub
Member
So I'm looking for a bit of guidance for a dilemma i'm in.
Long story short; I previously worked for a Company A as a temp for the christmas period. Once my contact ended on Dec, I stayed on for a day to day basis till they decided whether to keep me on or let me go. I was later relieved in early Feb because the department was experiencing a downturn, but they told me to leave my resume in case anything popped up.
In the meantime during my last week there, my supervisor referred me to one of his old work buddies for a position at his company. Got a interview was offered to start working at Company B the next business day that I ended with Company A.
Now Company A has rang me up saying there is a position opening up due to internal promotion and asked if I was interested. I told them i was definitely interested but would have to sleep on it. The dilemma being that during my interview at Company B, I was asked by the work buddy if I severed my ties with Company A and would not would not walk out on them in the short term.
My heart is telling me that Company A has the better work environment, (potentially) salary, and more challenging/demanding workload. But I feel like an asshole betraying a friend's trust and verbal agreement said during the interview.
What do gaf.
Long story short; I previously worked for a Company A as a temp for the christmas period. Once my contact ended on Dec, I stayed on for a day to day basis till they decided whether to keep me on or let me go. I was later relieved in early Feb because the department was experiencing a downturn, but they told me to leave my resume in case anything popped up.
In the meantime during my last week there, my supervisor referred me to one of his old work buddies for a position at his company. Got a interview was offered to start working at Company B the next business day that I ended with Company A.
Now Company A has rang me up saying there is a position opening up due to internal promotion and asked if I was interested. I told them i was definitely interested but would have to sleep on it. The dilemma being that during my interview at Company B, I was asked by the work buddy if I severed my ties with Company A and would not would not walk out on them in the short term.
My heart is telling me that Company A has the better work environment, (potentially) salary, and more challenging/demanding workload. But I feel like an asshole betraying a friend's trust and verbal agreement said during the interview.
What do gaf.
Blah, I got a call today from the retail store I were interviewed at last week and I got a "no" from them but I saw it coming.
I called the other stores I sent applications to 2 weeks ago, one of them haven't read it and won't until they need some new workforce and the other one has gone on vacation for 2 weeks.
Then I called my former boss from another store where I were an intern (practice) for 4 months and they really liked me, but the boss didn't pick up the phone, so I got another one to tell her to call me if she got time.
It's really hard getting a job. I really need money for pay and apartment *suk*. =(
But I won't give up, I'll go out with 7 more applications today!
I called the other stores I sent applications to 2 weeks ago, one of them haven't read it and won't until they need some new workforce and the other one has gone on vacation for 2 weeks.
Then I called my former boss from another store where I were an intern (practice) for 4 months and they really liked me, but the boss didn't pick up the phone, so I got another one to tell her to call me if she got time.
It's really hard getting a job. I really need money for pay and apartment *suk*. =(
But I won't give up, I'll go out with 7 more applications today!
Unemployed for the last four months. Currently stuck in hell. I get about 300$ each month in cash now. Yeah, that's for a whole month.
Can't pay all bills. Can't buy food. Getting sick of borrowing money from friends and family to be able to make it.
Worst is, I am applying for jobs constantly. Every fucking day. Always get nothing. Due to this, I am sinking into quite a depression. It's horrible. Bah.
Just needed to vent.
Can't pay all bills. Can't buy food. Getting sick of borrowing money from friends and family to be able to make it.
Worst is, I am applying for jobs constantly. Every fucking day. Always get nothing. Due to this, I am sinking into quite a depression. It's horrible. Bah.
Just needed to vent.
TheyTookOurJobs
Member
Have you tried temp places at all?
krameriffic
Member
There is no way in hell you can apply to jobs 8 hours a day. You'd just be sending out applications for the hell of it at that point. Target jobs that you are good for, don't just throw it at the wall and see what sticks.
Yepp.
Shit out of luck there too. Sweden fucking sucks right now.
Hopefully I will go into University, but still, what if I don't? How will I make ends meet? Blah.
wormstrangler
Banned
Today is my last day of work. End of winter season at a mountain resort.
It's an exciting time. I'm not sure what country I'll be in or when I'll have another job.
It's an exciting time. I'm not sure what country I'll be in or when I'll have another job.
Freeza Under The Shower
Member
can I ask what type of job that would be? (previous ones, not this one as your would-be employer might not appreciate sharing that info, if that's an issue)
Surface of Me
I'm not an NPC. And neither are we.
Got an interview for Pizza Hut at the end of the week. Honestly, I feel as if I'd rather work there than at Buckle, but I'd be content with either right now.
ajim
Member
I actually find phone interviews much more difficult than in person ones. The only problem is for all the interviews I've had the past few weeks they've involved phone interviews, then one one one interviews in person, and then final group interviews. It's been intense. 3 hour long interviews. Geez.
I feel so mentally fatigued by the end of each one, and I'm waiting back to hear from a job today on whether or not they'll hire me (passed all of the previous stages, and they just completed referee checks) and another 3 hour long final group interview this afternoon.
Eh.
System Admin. I'm still employed, but testing the waters for other places to work since I'm not getting along with management right now. I'm hoping to get myself a decent raise in the process.
I don't have any problem with the interview in this way - it's more stressful for me to be face to face, so this works well. I have all the knowledge and skills needed, so the interview portion should be no sweat.
Collectively venting with my fellow unemployed bros/sisters in here. Watching another set of opportunities I was sure I was a shoo-in for go down the drain...well, sucks as always.
Beginning to turn to my various groups of friends in semi-desperate pleas for whatever work ops. they hear of at their companies or associated businesses. Is that a bad move?
You always hear conflicting advice about whether or not to broadcast that you're unemployed and looking; some say you have to and need to, and others say you're making yourself look unappealing and pathetic if you have to broadcast that.
Argh. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
When I got turned down for a volunteer position yesterday, I officially 'gave up' temporarily. I just shut my laptop, took a shower and pissed off for the rest of the day. Felt good. I think everyone deserves a 'fuck it all' day every now and then.
Beginning to turn to my various groups of friends in semi-desperate pleas for whatever work ops. they hear of at their companies or associated businesses. Is that a bad move?
You always hear conflicting advice about whether or not to broadcast that you're unemployed and looking; some say you have to and need to, and others say you're making yourself look unappealing and pathetic if you have to broadcast that.
Argh. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
When I got turned down for a volunteer position yesterday, I officially 'gave up' temporarily. I just shut my laptop, took a shower and pissed off for the rest of the day. Felt good. I think everyone deserves a 'fuck it all' day every now and then.
you should never feel like asking friends about positions or ins at their respective companies is a bad thing. after all, most of getting a job these days is networking and knowing people. don't be overbearing on them, but asking for their help shouldn't be a big deal. With that said, you need to be sure just how good of a friend they are and what you can bring to the table. If they all work at places where you really can't offer anything, don't be angry if they offer not to help or are very reluctant.
I wouldn't say lower your standards, but perhaps refine your job search. Also, be wary of places that respond too quickly - desperation is a sign of instability within the work place, or a high churn rate.
you're not wrong, but a quick response can also be "we need help badly because of all this new amazing work and you sound great on paper. come in to interview!"
so i would never consider a fast response off putting. i suppose it depends on what research tells you about the company/industry.
TheyTookOurJobs
Member
Don't feel bad about broadcasting that you're unemployed; if people can help you, they'd be glad to help.
Applied to Menards today. Hopefully something will come of it.
The downsides to online interviews - ended up all being via chat and it's at the 2.5 hour mark and the guy interviewing is still asking me seemingly random questions (as if they're coming off the top of his head) with no end in sight.
It doesn't help that there's huge delays between his questions, some of the questions are vague at best ,and his English is so-so.
I'm bored out of my mind (I have the chat window up on the other monitor) so will probably not get hired here, or even take the job if they do offer to hire me, as when I get bored my answers get lazy.
It doesn't help that there's huge delays between his questions, some of the questions are vague at best ,and his English is so-so.
I'm bored out of my mind (I have the chat window up on the other monitor) so will probably not get hired here, or even take the job if they do offer to hire me, as when I get bored my answers get lazy.
it wasn't even a video chat?
Nope. We're finally past the technical part, but it's just a straight up chat session on hipchat.com with me and 5 other people (with just 1 asking questions).
sounds terrible.
Yes, it is pretty terrible. It's almost 8 pm at night, I've been off work for 3 hours, and I've done nothing but answer random technical questions based on scenarios that I'm assuming this specific tech much have run into on his job (the person doing the interview isn't even a part of management) and man... I'm ready for a beer. And some dinner.
LOL. Just spent 55 minutes filling out an application for RGIS because of some bullshit "strongly agree"/"strongly disagree" questionnaire with 85+ questions, AND literally 5 seconds after I hit the submit button, an e-mail appeared in my inbox telling me that they've "decided to pursue other candidates".
Signs of the times I guess. In the future, Human Resources departments will be ran entirely by computers and robots. =/
Signs of the times I guess. In the future, Human Resources departments will be ran entirely by computers and robots. =/
Hydrogen Bluebird
Member
I'm currently employed but I'm hating my job and some policies in my company more and more (and the pay is below average) so I'm really considering gowing AWOL since I'd have to pay a large sum of money if I resign.
Do you send out generic cover letters?
It's best to tailor each and every letter you send out.
I'm sorry, but it's vent time. Gonna have to call bullshit on all these people saying to lower my standards in job seeking - They don't think I apply to McDonald's and other fast food joints enough? I mean, how do I compete with 100+ people going for the same fast food or cleaner roles when I'm likely to be overqualified? A recruitment agency even considered me overqualified for a trainee admin post when all my life's work has been temporary! I can't afford accommodation cleaning an office for 8 hours a week, let alone find a room/house share that will let an unemployed jobseeker stay. It all just seems impossible... When september comes I may go back to uni and become a nurse, the NHS pays the fees and both parents have worked in health.
Amen. As a veteran, I've been told by fast food places more than once that I'm overqualified, and I've signed up with every (relevant) temp agency and job recruitment center in the tri-county area and a few have told me that I'm "too specialized". That doesn't even make sense because I mostly did admin/clerical work in the Air Force and my resume reflects that.
Currently looking for a summer job. I am having a tough time applying for jobs because I go to school in Toronto but live in Maine over the summer. I am using jobsinme.com but have to put my home phone number for contact info because I don't have a US phone number for the summer yet (I use a month to month plan while in the US). Unfortunately I won't be there for another two weeks so my parents will be getting all the calls I may get until then heh.
I hope I can find a good job (I worked at Walmart last summer and while I didn't hate it, I would like to find something a bit better this time around), hopefully one for the town doing Summer Rec or working at one of the parks (Beaches!).
Best of luck to the rest of you as well. I got at least 3 years until I enter the real workforce so it isn't really a huge issue for me like it seems to be for some of you. Just keep pushing!
I hope I can find a good job (I worked at Walmart last summer and while I didn't hate it, I would like to find something a bit better this time around), hopefully one for the town doing Summer Rec or working at one of the parks (Beaches!).
Best of luck to the rest of you as well. I got at least 3 years until I enter the real workforce so it isn't really a huge issue for me like it seems to be for some of you. Just keep pushing!
ajim
Member
Yay. Was offered a good job with a big insurance company. Feels good man. And have another large energy company (they said yesterday in the final group interview that over 200 people applied for the role, and they shortlisted it down to the remaining 8 there. which was surprising) currently performing referee checks, which I hope results in another job offer. Both seem great, but I wouldn't know how to choose between the two, although I did receive a better, friendlier vibe from the energy company.
I certainly wouldn't create a resume & cover letter on your own. But there are plenty of examples for both online you could look at/copy.
I dunno, I had my resume done with help from a career advisor in college, and it's pretty much stayed the same since then (with updates, of course).
Congrats! I would go with the energy company, but that's just me.
ajim
Member
Thank you!
Yeah, my 'heart' says to go with the energy company because everyone was just ridiculously nice, conversations were easy, and they just seemed like good friends already. It would be a great working environment/team.
However, my 'brain' says to go with the insurance company because the insurance branch I'm working for is in it's infancy and has seen crazy growth over the past year, and will continue to grow fast. There seems to be a lot of room for professional development within that branch and the overall company.
I don't know, I'm just happy more than anything.
With regards to resume/cover letter writing - I do it myself. However, I did a lot of research into resumes, and the various formats/types etc. I went for a 'descriptive' type, that displayed my writing skills, and allowed me to explain past working experiences in a professional tone, instead of going for a dot-point format.
As for the cover letter - I kept it simple; I literally just elaborated slightly more on my past work history, key skills/attributes, why I'd be great for the role, and why the role would be great for me. You only need a few well-written paragraphs.
bengraven
Member
Yeah, I do personal letters and in fact I kind of wonder if that's my issue. Maybe I'm not sucking enough dick in the letter, and/or maybe my vocabulary isn't hitting the right notes they're looking for.
The only fast responses I get are from companies that deceived me into thinking they were in the field I want. Mostly outside sales jobs (simply can't do it) or "work from home" jobs that pretend to be something completely different.
Yep, same issue as me. I can't get a job at the local gas stations because I was told twice that I'm "overqualified" and they're looking for people with "different standards" aka really low ones I assume. I've done call center work for 7 years and my resume reflects that and when I was looking for work in 2007 I had hits all the time (and that was for only 2 years experience). I want to just walk in and tell someone "look, I have done all the shitty phone center work on the planet, I don't care...I AM the person you want for this position plus some".
don't suck up too much to them. that would wreak of desperation. But do sound like you have an affinity for their product or what they do. vocabulary I am sure plays a large role as well. I've been surprised at how often I would reread a cover letter and make new edits after every read. When I would read it once for spelling errors and fire it off, I would later read it again when prepping for the next send out and I'd realize there was so much I could have changed. Finding new ways to say the same tried and true is always best.
bengraven
Member
I'm probably going to have to work on that. I can only stay unemployed so long - I already have people who have literally cut me out of their life because of this.
jesus. that sounds shitty. i don't mean any disrespect, but are they just assholes or do you feel like you were somehow burdening them? not that the latter makes it alright for them to cut you off. just curious.
Been unemployed for 2 months now; going on my 2nd overall interview today, which is with the same company that laid me off 2 months ago. It is for a different position but man is it going to be strange going back there after the bitter feelings. Oh well, we will see what happens today.
aside from wanting/needing work, why would you go back to a place that laid you off and you have bitter feelings towards?
Ivan A Nguyen
Member
So in the states it's called a resume, but I'll speak to the CV subject.
The person who said you should look at examples and such is right. That is the best way. Find one you really like and copy it's style.
I worked with my best friend for hours crafting his resume, partly because he doesn't understand what it was meant to say, and it's taxing work. I think it would be great if GAF could come together and work out a template for us to share. The first version of the resume I got from my friend was a paragraph. A paragraph of text that included his age, that he was a US citizen, had a car, and was available any time. It was bad.
Bitter that I was laid off but not enough where I wouldn't take a golden opportunity. I am not an old veteran worker by any means, but I have learned to look at that big picture in situations, and this is one of them. It won't be the same position plus the money is definitely there.
bengraven
Member
Um, the major issue is that my wife had to go to work. She has some health issues, nothing detrimental to work, but she also likes to get a bit dramatic around her family about how much pain she's in and it's pretty much turned quite a few people against me. As if I'm the one causing her pain. I hate it, but I can't do much about it and she actually really enjoys her job.
The minor issue is that I'm a man and my wife was a stay at home mom. And we basically switched roles with her working and me being a stay at home. And that's not manly. It's already bad enough that I'm a geek and a college dropout, but now "mooching" off her (interesting note: my unemployment earns 3/4 of what she does, so technically we're near equals and considering we save hundreds a month on daycare...) and add to the major issue and now I'm mooching off my wife and causing her pain.
It's like people forget that I supported my wife for 6 years at a great company with tons of benefits that helped pay for my son's birth and my wife's initial surgeries before getting unemployed - now it's suddenly "you married a geek loser without a job!".
I was actually fired from my last job (which is probably another reason my resume keeps getting thrown in the trash) and I've applied at every temp agency in the city. And it never fails, but every month I get a call from a temp agency telling me they found the perfect job for me: and then informing me that it's my old job. I tell them "I would love to, but they fired me" and they still keep trying to get me rehired. They actually got my hopes up that I would be hired on in another department, even talking to another manager who adored me and who said to please send my resume through ASAP. No response back.
It's like my old job is basically the only client these temp agencies have.
That certainly sucks that her family/friends feel that way about you and can't see it from your perspective. it isn't like you're not trying to find work so you can change up the situation. if your wife is happy, then that should count for something. it sucks she has the pain she does, but right now it seems like your situation isn't so dire, especially since you're UE is 3/4 what she brings in.
when you find work, is your wife planning on quitting and going back to stay at home mom or are you guys going to be a two income family?
So I recently jumped before I was pushed at that crazy stressful job I've talked about here before. Looking for new work.
I'm trying to think of what I want to do next. I've applied to a few jobs just for the sake of it as i'm in panic mode ATM, but a recruiter called me back earlier this week and asked me what elements of the role I liked and I struggled. I just don't know what I want to do really.
My social anxiety issues are a serious barrier. I think an element of why I couldn't cope at my last role was due to me putting off tasks that required social contact, particularly when I needed help or was unsure of problems. This was compounded a lot by a boss that snapped and got angry at being interrupted, and expressed doubts over my capability if I was ever unsure of anything, ever. I was also regularly accused of being too slow even though I was struggling with the workload. It just made my avoidance behaviors even worse.
I've tried using numerical, verbal and logical reasoning tests, plus a work preference / personality test to help me . They all tell me that I'm best suited to careers such as systems analyst, database administrator, auditor, actuary etc. The issue is that I don't necessarily agree with these. For example, when I took a Myers-Briggs test my answers to the situation-response questions were influenced more by my anxiety issues rather than who I naturally would be if I could express myself properly.
I'm trying to think of what I want to do next. I've applied to a few jobs just for the sake of it as i'm in panic mode ATM, but a recruiter called me back earlier this week and asked me what elements of the role I liked and I struggled. I just don't know what I want to do really.
My social anxiety issues are a serious barrier. I think an element of why I couldn't cope at my last role was due to me putting off tasks that required social contact, particularly when I needed help or was unsure of problems. This was compounded a lot by a boss that snapped and got angry at being interrupted, and expressed doubts over my capability if I was ever unsure of anything, ever. I was also regularly accused of being too slow even though I was struggling with the workload. It just made my avoidance behaviors even worse.
I've tried using numerical, verbal and logical reasoning tests, plus a work preference / personality test to help me . They all tell me that I'm best suited to careers such as systems analyst, database administrator, auditor, actuary etc. The issue is that I don't necessarily agree with these. For example, when I took a Myers-Briggs test my answers to the situation-response questions were influenced more by my anxiety issues rather than who I naturally would be if I could express myself properly.
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