Arnold Schwarzenegger, Maria Shriver announce separation

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Oh noes. how am I going to do the impression without talking about Maria. :(

In my head this plays out like a version of Jingle all the Way with Phil Hartman taking Arnie's wife

PUT THE COOKIES DOWN NOW
 
This article mostly seems to be the LA Times patting themselves on the back for prying into his marital life. He isn't Governor anymore, why are they even "raising questions" over the relationship?
 
BannedEpisode said:
My roommate is irrationally obsessed with Arnold and is legitimately depressed by this news.
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I sorta am too. In my mind Arnie married her to create a super baby (Arnie logic). An Austrian powered JFK that would become President and take over the world as Arnie's legacy.
 
sangreal said:
This article mostly seems to be the LA Times patting themselves on the back for prying into his marital life. He isn't Governor anymore, why are they even "raising questions" over the relationship?
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because in four months it'll be PEOPLE magazine's territory, and right now--when he still has the smell of politics and official news--is the time to really invade his privacy real good and whiff the dirty laundry.
 
25 years is a pretty good run.


I'd say I'm sorry to hear it but Louis CK pointed out that you shouldn't feel bad about divorce . . . if it really was a good marriage, it wouldn't end.
 
He realized that they weren't going to pass that Amendment for foreign-born Presidents, so he gave up on trying to leverage the Kennedy name for a Republican presidency.
 
Time to go to Rio.

arnold2mn3.gif
 
I'd go see a new Terminator film with Arnie and Christian Bale.

Just get uber-hacks Brancato and Ferris FAR AWAY from the script, and get a better director than McG. Wouldn't hold out hope for Cameron, but just someone decent.
 
Ninja Scooter said:
Translation: Now that I am now longer in politics, I don't need a wife and want the freedom to fuck young girls that don't look like the crypt keeper.
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or....

It was a mutual decision but they decided to hold off until the political career was over, so that the personal life wouldnt make issues with laws he wanted passed.

It's typical. Very rarely do politicians divorce.

Look at Bill and Hillary. How often are they together? Their marriage is one of political convenience at this point.
 
Just the other day I was asking myself why this bro was with such an old looking chick? If I were him, i'd be screwin' 18 year olds, WOOOOOO and coke.
 
"This has been a time of great personal and professional transition for each of us," the statement read. "After a great deal of thought, reflection, discussion and prayer, we came to this decision together. At this time, we are living apart while we work on the future of our relationship.
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bullshit. nobody who is contemplating a divorce/seperation gets down on their knees and says 'oh jesus, please tell us what to do' and he almost never says 'uhm, seperate and press statement'.

Politicians are so ridiculous.
 
numble said:
He realized that they weren't going to pass that Amendment for foreign-born Presidents, so he gave up on trying to leverage the Kennedy name for a Republican presidency.
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Not sure if serious. I'm sure there's a Demolition man pun in there, but I'm not creative enough to pull it out.
 
Arnold had such an amazing body back in the day. Too bad his face makes him look like a caveman :(

I could eat non stop, work out while eating nonstop and never get to be this big.

I0scd.jpg


How the hell does it work? Steroids?!
 
Teh Hamburglar said:
Arnold had such an amazing body back in the day. Too bad his face makes him look like a caveman :(

I could eat non stop, work out while eating nonstop and never get to be this big.

I0scd.jpg


How the hell does it work? Steroids?!
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Well, Arnie has admitted to using steriods. So, yeah.
 
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