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[MrAngryFace]

So im back in town in Fable, just killed something big in the game. New duds, new name. Respect, ya know? So Im in the bar getting horribly drunk and his woman comes up. Pours honey in my ears for a good five minutes. One thing leads to another and im boozing her up, she's drunk and wants to find an inn. She must have been pretty fucked up.

Anyway so we go to the second floor, hop in bed. The next morning she wants to get married. So im like ok. Head down to the fucking weaponsmith and sell my FAVORITE sword to buy this lady who supposedly loves me, a wedding ring. I walk up to her and a friend. They're hugging and saying good by, I think hey good time to give her the ring.

WRONG! I accidently use the force spell and propell her and her friend against a tree. Fucking hell this is bad. So she's screaming GUARDS GUARDS and her friend is crying. I use my newly gained BY BEING A GOOD GUY, apology skill but it just wont take, she keeps saying its over, I try to show her the ring but she's not interested.

At this point I look over her shoulder and see the guards are fucking charnging me to lay down the law. I dont put up a fuss at first, but they want a SHITLOAD of money I dont have. So I guess I need to die. All the while the lady from the bar who was going to MARRY me is screaming for me to get punished so I send a gajillion volts of electricity through her and force push the guards away running and running.

But its too late, this lady has turned me into a monster and there's no stopping it. I unleash all my magic/weapon power on this town. I kill scores of guards, burst into shops amid the panicked questions as to why im doing this.

ILL TELL YOU FUCKERS WHY! IM DOING IT FOR LOVE!

 

[AniHawk]

Don't worry. She'll respawn a couple days from now. Life's all about second chances, after all.

 

[MrAngryFace]

I hope she forgets, how embarassing.

 

[MightyHedgehog]

See...this is one of the big reasons why I love this game...despite its flaws. It's truly something to be driven to such heights of madness and murder...when all you were trying to do was just be good.

 

[Drek]

FHUTA!

 

[AniHawk]

See...this is one of the big reasons why I love this game...despite its flaws. It's truly something to be driven to such heights of madness and murder...when all you were trying to do was just be good.

Spoiler

I was fighting those rock monster things that come out of the ground in the arena, and I'm doing pretty well... BUT WHISPER IS JUST STANDING THERE, AND BOTH ARE HURLING ROCKS AT ME! That bitch got exactly what was coming to her.

And her brother too, for that matter.

 

[Naked Snake]

:lol

 

[bheemer]

that shit pissed me off too anihawk. did the same for me.

except in mine she would always back into that rotating blade and fall over,

that scene took forever for me.

 

[MrAngryFace]

whisperer is a bitch, but she takes losses well hah

 

[Uno Ill Nino]

Yeah, Fable is awesome. I annihilated both churches and everyone around them the other day. I was trying to sacrifice a bunch of people to the chapel of skorm so I could get something for it, but the people there kept telling me that my sacrifices were mostly useless and I'd need to try harder next time. I brought them half of a town for fuck's sake and they STILL said that. Bringing people there isn't easy, dammit. So when they called me "pathetic" and threatened to throw me out of the chapel for such lousy offerings, I blew a gasket and killed everyone in sight. Those devil-worshippers were straight-up PUSSIES. I killed one of them and then farted over his corpse while the last one watched and tried to threaten me with his fists. What a joke. I made Skorm's followers my BITCHES. Its really too bad you can't meet Skorm himself as I would love to have my maxed out character piss in his mouth for never appreciating all my hard work.

At the other church, I gave some money in hopes of getting something nice out of it and all they did was complain that I didn't give enough. So I gave a little more. Then some more. And more. And more. And fuck if I didn't give more and it STILL wasn't enough. By this time I'm nearly broke and I have nothing to show for it. So I decided that I had just been taken for a ride and should return the favor. Out comes my sword, and off goes their heads. Then I got a real bad rap with everybody outside the place so in order to keep them all from spreading the word I had to take them all out too. Big mouth sons of bitches. They just don't know when to keep their mouths shut. You'd think one of them would say, "Just let me go and I won't tell anyone a thing, honest!" but instead you get, "That's a terrible deed no matter who you are." Judgemental fucks. Should've given me SOMETHING for all that money or this wouldn't have happened in the first place.

 

[Soul4ger]

Wait, you can sleep with people before marrying them?

 

[DarienA]

Wait, you can sleep with people before marrying them?

FABLE PROMOTES PRE-MARTIAL SEX!!!! CALL THE REPUBLICANS!!!!

 

[Soul4ger]

FABLE PROMOTES PRE-MARTIAL SEX!!!! CALL THE REPUBLICANS!!!!

ANSWER MY QUESTION! WHAT ARE YOU DAN RATHER?!!

 

[Uno Ill Nino]

No, you can't. No matter how much you think you can and no matter what the woman says, you can't. You can go rent a bed and she'll still be standing next to you when you wake up, but you didn't do it. MAF just has to check his "number of times you've had sex" stat to verify that.

 

[MrAngryFace]

I SWORE WE HAD SEX!


see, fable is just like real life

 

[Scrow]

:lol

That was great. Just like real life.

 

[Slo]

If you spent good money on that bitch and she didn't give it up to you, she had it comin'.

 

[Soul4ger]

I was really tempted to start fucking people up when I was playing a minigame in a bar, and everyone kept calling me chicken chaser. Thought to myself, "Son of a bitch, I just saved your village, and you want to ask me if I chase chickens?! WE'LL SEE HOW FUNNY YOU THINK IT IS IN A MINUTE." But I restrained myself, and realized they weren't exactly picking on me, I just didn't buy a new name for myself yet. :\

 

[Orin GA]

You need to stop blaming fable for things that really happened in your life

 

[Yusaku]

If you want pre-marital sex play the Sim 2. The game demands I have sex with as many sims as possible to get asperation points.

 

[AeroGod]

I musta married some chick from PETA. I kicked a chicken and then she stopped talking to me. So i just left her and never returned, hooked up with Lady Gray. That bitch never puts out though.

I married a guy a few days ago and that seems to be going pretty well. Sex every night, a nice dowry and gifts every other day. Best relationship I ever had.

 

[jonhuz]

I've just started playing too. I decided from the start I would slaughter everything that moves, cept now I feel really bad and can't enter lookout point without facing a huge fine after a drunken punch up with the school kids. I'm a bad man

 

[AniHawk]

I marry women mainly for their money. I got 30k off of their dowries.

"I'm going to enjoy married life!"

And they did.

Well, until I bashed their heads in with an Obsidian Greathammer. But that's why you should never trust the guy with glowing red eyes and horns growing out of his head.

 

[Soul4ger]

I marry women mainly for their money. I got 30k off of their dowries.

"I'm going to enjoy married life!"

And they did.

Well, until I bashed their heads in with an Obsidian Greathammer. But that's why you should never trust the guy with glowing red eyes and horns growing out of his head.

But... But you're so handsome!

 

[3phemeral]

Reading that makes me sooo interested in playing this game.

 

[belgurdo]

Reading that makes me sooo interested in playing this game.

Rent first

 

[MrAngryFace]

chances are if you've never read a preview for fable, youll love it cause you wouldnt had been taken in by hype monsters!

 

[AniHawk]

But... But you're so handsome!

Devilishly handsome.

 

[tralfazz]

It takes something really good for me to laugh out loud at video game humor/stories. I just feel geeky, but damn if I didn't laugh at this stuff. Any sites that have running diaries like these posts. Keep it up guys.

 

[={<SMOKE>}=]

you know, i've played for a few hours and have found the game boring and tedious, but reading you guys' comments makes me want to push on. when does the game get fun? right now it just simple fetch quest after simple fetch quest. as soon as i finish one, that guy at the guild goes, "you have a new quest card at the guild" every three minutes... should i keep on or trade it in?

 

[MrAngryFace]

stop taking quests, they dont fly away. Just bother around town, buy stuff, try stuff. The game only lets you do what you want as much as you want to do what you want.

 

[AniHawk]

you know, i've played for a few hours and have found the game boring and tedious, but reading you guys' comments makes me want to push on. when does the game get fun? right now it just simple fetch quest after simple fetch quest. as soon as i finish one, that guy at the guild goes, &quot;you have a new quest card at the guild&quot; every three minutes... should i keep on or trade it in?

Well, if you're just trying to be good, screw that. Best to just be evil and fuck around with everyone... or trade it in if you still don't like it.

 

[SKluck]

Is there any way to basically..... "OWN" a town? Not really own, but just kill everyone so they are all afraid of you? I went to oakvale and basically killed maybe 30 guards, the red guards came out, they just spawn and spawn... What is the fun in that? Nice EXP, but I basically have fines of 90,000 so every time I go there I have to refuse to pay and kick the shit out of guards... I want them to be afraid of me or run away.

 

[Uno Ill Nino]

The guards will never run from you. They will continue to embrace death time and time again, no matter how godly you are. Believe me, I know.

I once owned every building in Oakvale but the two shops. I even had the tavern and the barns. The town was basically empty cuz I didnt' rent out any of my buildings. I still want to buy those two shops to see if anything happens when I do. It'd be kinda cool to see it become deserted. I wonder if the guards would go away then? It'd be MY town so I could do whatever the fuck I want and they couldn't say shit, right? Hmm.....gonna have to find out....

 

[Late Stage Marxist]

Ahh the memories. I'm thinking of keeping my copy of Fable now. I played it nonstop the week it came out, but I think maybe I just OD'd on it. I should give it a 2nd chance.

 

[AniHawk]

I went back to it after breaking away for Stretch Panic, Katamari Damacy, and Mr. Mosquito. Now I'm playing it regularly again like I do with Donkey Konga.