:| must have been ages the last time I done that. Everything is now serious.
Depression
- Thread starter Jea Song
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:| must have been ages the last time I done that. Everything is now serious.
BlueSummers
Member
Damn, this sounds just like me. I didn't go out to dinner with my family tongiht because I just am feeling so down today. I even said to my mom something along the lines of " yea, am I just going to say I'm just sitting here not talking because I'm depressed?" She kind of didn't say much after that.
I think I just can't say anything to them, let alone my own parents, probably a culture of being composed and acting if everything is normal has made me this emotionless guy who doesn't say much.
Anyway I better go to sleep, I have a letter of concern that from the head of the department who I have to see tomorrow anyway, oh joy.
Anyway I better go to sleep, I have a letter of concern that from the head of the department who I have to see tomorrow anyway, oh joy.
My father has just been through it. It all started with a silly fight, but he's stubborn and I'm aswell so I decided to ignore him (he did too). After a month or so we got in contact but it didn't go well since he would go nuts over anything I wrote to him as if he forced himself to get mad at me for no reason.
I was pretty pissed but then suddenly he texted basicly saying "Hey man, turns out your old man has been hit by depression". I never gave it a thought before this because we've had our fights before but not like this though.
It was his medication that caused his mind to go crazy. He had his neck operated years ago due too serious, constant pain hence the medication.
Everything is good today and there hasn't been anything since.
And that dog is just amazing, it really brought a big smile to my face.
I was pretty pissed but then suddenly he texted basicly saying "Hey man, turns out your old man has been hit by depression". I never gave it a thought before this because we've had our fights before but not like this though.
It was his medication that caused his mind to go crazy. He had his neck operated years ago due too serious, constant pain hence the medication.
Everything is good today and there hasn't been anything since.
And that dog is just amazing, it really brought a big smile to my face.
What do you guys do for motivation? I was just at this retreat for about a week and I really enjoyed it and I felt pretty good when I left, but now that I'm back home I just feel the motivation has been sucked out of me. I know what I want to do but I really struggle to try. And I even know the main reason why I do this but I still feel like the energy I had over that week has just evaporated. Maybe it's the town? It's so small and it feels like there's nothing here for me. I'd love to move to the city but I don't know how to go about it, especially since I've never worked a paying job and don't have my license. I really feel trapped, like I can't do this.
SquiddyCracker
Banned
Dreams.
Make moving to a city your goal, and always keep it at the back of your head - it works best if you're genuinely excited about it and looking forward to moving away.
IrrelevantNotch
Banned
hey guys, I'm not sure if I should start a new topic, or post my problems here, but here I go anyway. So I've been depressed for about 10 years now. Recently I discovered that marijuana does a pretty good job of relieving my anxiety/depression so I thought it would be best if I could somehow move to California to get a prescription for the stuff. Freshly out of a job I thought it would be best to try and get a job offer of some sort before moving, but I got anxious and moved anyway not wanting to be a burden on grandparents anymore. That was one day ago. So now I'm in Indio, CA, approximately 4 hours from my nearest family member (AZ), and with only half a grand in my bank account. I was having such a hard time motivating myself while staying with my grandparents that I decided I should just punish myself and try to find a solution to my problems while living in my car hoping it would speed up the process of getting my life on track. But now I'm here, and I just feel absolutely lost. I was thinking about taking out a loan for school and using it to by myself a year's worth of housing while I looked for a job and built a life for myself, but I'm so confused on what I need to do get that loan, or how much I'm even allowed to get. I suppose I could try and go back if things get really bad, but I don't think my car has more than a hundred miles in it before it tanks, which means I could be stranded.
I nkow that was a lot to say, but I just need to vent so thanks to anyone who reads this.
I nkow that was a lot to say, but I just need to vent so thanks to anyone who reads this.
That's been a real issue for me over the last year or so. I've felt like it would be better to not even attempt my goals rather than trying and risking failure. I know this now and I know that not ultimately achieving my goals isn't important because I'll still be learning from these experiences and growing as a person and I know that failure will not make me less of a person. But I still feel like I'm stuck, yet I'm barely trying to get out.
My brain is so fucking crazy.
While I really, really admire your resolve and courage I think you may need to fall back a bit and think about your next move. The 'throw in the deep end and learn to swim' thing can be a huge motivator for some people (like yourself, if you've already gone and done it!) but you can't throw yourself too far out there, where you really have no idea what to do.
Please keep us posted on your situation. And know that it's never a bad idea to retreat and then venture out again with the knowledge you gained.
That's kinda wild. You are risking a lot by not telling everything to them and potentially hindering your chances of "improving".
I know for a fact what kinds of medication will be prescribed, and how much of a fast track to suicide it will be
smfh.
Then maybe talk about those things in here so someone with similar background could dime in? I mean the worst thing you can do is to pile everything in and not get any treatment.
scar tissue
Banned
Yeah, my parents feel accused if I bring it up. And rightfully so.
They're mostly okay guys, but man, they really are some dumb fucks concerning their parenting.
So I finally decided to go and see a doctor about my anxiety issues which are quite severe and leads to bad depressive states that fluctuate like crazy. Anyways he prescribed Celexa and Buspar, anyone have any experience with them? Never been too familiar with these types of drugs so I'm not sure what to expect
I am beginning to pull away from my family. It's a sad thing to do, but they really don't bring a lot of good to my life. Lots of drama, lots of arguing and bickering between everyone. I don't need that shit in my life right now. I have enough issues to deal with internally, I don't need those external issues, also.
Been on Celexa for about three years now. I do fine with it... It keeps me level, I should say... Up to 40 mg/day now which is the highest dosage. Didn't have many side effects with it...
Ok thats good, especially the side effects which is what I was most worried about. I hope it doesnt interfere too much with my weightlifting goals since it's one of the few things I look forward to do.
I know what you mean with internal issues and then dealing with your family. Its a constant drain physically and mentally.
Yep... I know if I think about certain things it is going to make me depressed, and then I go and think about them. Fucking scumbag brain.
Bel Marduk
Banned
We should maybe set up a permanent chat for this thread. I know that, for myself and others, socializing normally is a pretty nervewracking experience and I feel like I can't relate to people who aren't suffering from anxiety and depression.. a chat for us would be very beneficial.
http://tinychat.com/depressiongaf is already set up and ready to go..
http://tinychat.com/depressiongaf is already set up and ready to go..
what are you even doing in this thread?
User 100115
Banned
Hey guys, once again my kids gave me the plague so I am going to be pretty absent for a bit. 104 fever and not being able to talk and holy shit, I've not run a fever this high in a long time. My fingers don't even want to type right, I keep having to backspace.
Love to you all, and be kind to yourselfs kay>?
Love to you all, and be kind to yourselfs kay>?
Collete
Member
TUROK
Member
Feel better soon.
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
Get better, take care!
Somehow got into this thread, and after reading the first post and skipping 127 pages I can tell the OP (and anyone else having that kinda feelings) that when left with some free time, try to create something. Anything will do, as long as you're doing something else than wallowing in suicidal swamp. It keeps your mind occupied, provided you focus on the task, and relieves the thoughts, that's what I've felt.
I myself like to paint, carve some wood, build small things out of wood, draw, cook, what have you. Even if you're not an artist or hate to do something with your hands, you should try it. The result may seem like shit, but even that makes you realise that you have just created something out of thin air (almost). The path to the result is healing. Plus the more you do, the more you develop, that holds true with everything in life.
I myself like to paint, carve some wood, build small things out of wood, draw, cook, what have you. Even if you're not an artist or hate to do something with your hands, you should try it. The result may seem like shit, but even that makes you realise that you have just created something out of thin air (almost). The path to the result is healing. Plus the more you do, the more you develop, that holds true with everything in life.
Gucci Messiah
Banned
what's on your mind gt?
I know that feels...
What will they prescribe you? Have you tried every medication before?
I thought I had seen / done all there was to do with medication when it failed me, but now that I've ventured into several new types I found something that really, really works for me better than anything ever has before. And it has saved me from suicide.
If I told them I hate people and that I cant be around them, then most likely id just get therapy and a higher dose of antidepressants
What the hell is wrong with therapy? Do you think you can solve your hatred by any other means?
oh ive been to therapy many times for different reasons
Same here....
Both 'anti-depressants' and 'therapy' are insanely general, and both have had hundreds of varieties of them work for millions upon millions of people. Why do you 'know for a fact' that this will be a fast track to suicide?
Do these things never work? Are we all deceiving ourselves? Or are you saying they just never work for you?
Genuinely interested.
Prax
Member
Haha.. I generally hate people too..! >_> (part of me thinks it's because I'm being elitist and the other part thinks it's just social anxiety talking. I can't really tell which is which and it's probably a mixture a both so.. WHO KNOWS. I am trying to control my misanthropy these days though, and it's working I think.)
Maybe they'd just say you need to condition yourself to the environment through progressive exposure and relaxation until the gnawing hate doesn't make you want to blow up. That's just logical stuff, but some people need it really structured and in a step-by-step guide so if they fumble, they can get back on track again quickly.
No harm in asking for their opinion after telling them everything. At worst, it will just confirm your suspicions. At best, they might offer you something you haven't considered yet?
Although I think it's also nice to know you have a bit of a stubborn pride about it. You could build on that in other avenues.
Im already constantly on the brink
being forced to take any kind of pills has a pretty good chance of tipping the balance
id rather live this shitty life how it is now than be dead, so yeah
You think any and all psychiatric medications will make things worse / tip you into suicide? There's no chance they could ever fulfill their purpose by (even slightly) making things better?
my brain is so fucking destroyed, I cant take any more pills dude
Prax
Member
You can always hear them out and say no thanks if they offer pills and just ask for more of the practical work stuff.
Are you afraid that they might say pills are the only answer and that would lead to some kind of.. I don't know.. doom set in stone? (for the record, I don't like taking meds either.. even regular tylenols, so I understand the sentiment kind of XD)
whats more practical than going on month long adventure courses designed to help your self esteem and anxiety? I feel like ive gone the distance and gotten nowhere because I was just born broken
While I'm by no means saying psychiatry provides an amazing guarantee of health, I can absolutely promise that there exist at least a handful of options that will help. Took me a while to find something that worked and even longer to find a regimen that worked really well. In the hands of a sensible, prudent health professional your brain won't be destroyed. Not even close.
I promise. Seriously. And not in a dumb shit 'merp merp it always gets better just be happy!!!!
^_^' kind of way. It's all a big clusterfuck - life, psychiatry, therapy - all of it. But there's always something decent hanging around in there somewhere.Not every solution works for everyone.
Prax
Member
You did? What did that entail? That sounds kind of fun (but exhausting).
You didn't enjoy it in the least? I can imagine for me, I'd just want to go home in a day or two so I could relax for real because of my inclination to not feel "forced" into things, but yeah..
The most extreme "solutions" aren't always the only or best ones.
therapy and meds weren't working so I went for that option
it was basically a month away from civilization doing things like mountain climbing and white water kayaking
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