I was at this frat event for some nearby school last night and it sucked because I didn't know anyone there and it was a bunch of freshman. I'm also worried I did coke without remembering because I woke up this morning and my nose was bleeding pretty bad.
Needless to say this is not the new direction I've been wanting for my life but I feel like I'm trapped.
It's not the end of the world, man. Firstly, as someone in a fraternity, fraternity events tend to suck. Also doing coke once isn't the end of the world. Thirdly, you're not trapped. I felt this immense weight of depression and anxiety for months last year until I had an epiphany one day that I just had to tell myself I was going to do good things and get where I wanted to go. Tell yourself you're going to until you believe it and at that point it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don't let negativity overwhelm you.
It was actually weird, I smoked a lot that year and often it would make me anxious. That time though, as soon as I got done smoking I just had that epiphany and it solved a ton of my issues. It was a really strange day.