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Fitness |OT3| BroScience, Protein Dysentery, XXL Calf Implants, and Squat Rack Hogs

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ItAintEasyBeinCheesy

it's 4th of July in my asshole
2005 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
2004 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
2003 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
2002 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
2001 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
2000 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
1999 Ronnie Coleman Las Vegas, NV
1998 Ronnie Coleman New York, NY

Fuck yeah.

Asked earlier on for some inspirational movies/docos.

Pumping Iron, NO SHIT
Ronnie Coleman, The Unbelievable. YEAH BUDDY, LIGHT WEIGHT!
Testosterone Boys
Some in Viking/Angry, most in English
Pt 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFFOjZaA8ik
Pt 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv2t4RM_e1s&feature=related
Pt 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQpA059HMXg&feature=related
Pt 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vjfb8QUF29w&feature=related

Tell me MOREEEEEEEEEEEE.

Need to get PUMPED!
 

Bad_Boy

time to take my meds
FleckSplat said:
Try these:

218vCswgwXL._SL500_AA300_.jpg


Best headphones I've ever owned.
13 bucks, couldnt hurt to try them. thanks.
 

kylej

Banned
Zuzana's body is absurd but her fake cans look weird in a few of her videos. Tough to slide silicon into a body that lean I suppose.

I'm finally giving up the elliptical and going to try the recumbent bike. The ellipticals at my gym just do not agree with my stubby lower body at all. Right knee is always sore after doing 15 minutes of balls-out cardio, and it's scaring me away from doing deads and squats.
 

X-Frame

Member
kylej said:
Zuzana's body is absurd but her fake cans look weird in a few of her videos. Tough to slide silicon into a body that lean I suppose.

I'm finally giving up the elliptical and going to try the recumbent bike. The ellipticals at my gym just do not agree with my stubby lower body at all. Right knee is always sore after doing 15 minutes of balls-out cardio, and it's scaring me away from doing deads and squats.

It's because ellipticals aren't natural.

Why not just walk fast at an incline?
 

snoopen

Member
Had to miss my abs/shoulder workout this week and will have to skip 2 more next week as I'm interstate for work for 3 days..
How do you survive missing gym workouts? It makes me feel lazy..even if I do some sort of running/cardio that day.
 

Brolic Gaoler

formerly Alienshogun
snoopen said:
Had to miss my abs/shoulder workout this week and will have to skip 2 more next week as I'm interstate for work for 3 days..
How do you survive missing gym workouts? It makes me feel lazy..even if I do some sort of running/cardio that day.


I try not to think about it. Even on off days I earn (Sat/Sun) I feel like a fat ass. Then I end up punishing the shit out of my self all week.
 

suffah

Does maths and stuff
Need some help with pull-ups...

I can barely do 2-3 with good form, but that's not my question.

The issue is that I don't feel my back involved at all!

Pull-ups are a back exercise right? I feel it in my chest and upper arms...but nothing in my back. Am I not going high enough?

What am I doing wrong?
 

suffah

Does maths and stuff
Copernicus said:
As your form improves the balanced muscle engagement will kick in if you focused on form.

Thanks, that makes sense.

Gonna have someone film me to see what my form looks like.
 
Been tuning into my PB's at the gym (I train with KGs, so I will say how many 45lb plates, rather than converting + 25KG bar)

Bench = 6 x 45lbs
Squat = 8 x 45lbs
Deads = 10 x 45lbs
Shoulder press = 4 x 45lbs

Feeling stronger than ever, but it comes with the sacrifice of my body fat! Bulking is horrible but it has to be done for the power and strength gains. Weird thing I'm doing these at 6-8 reps for 4 sets. If I was to do power/strength sets and reps then I think I could go much stronger.

But my body is shatter. I have tennis elbow, weak wrist after breaking it, lower back spasms, knee cartilage damage and a prosthetic finger joint. So I guess it would be way too much stress for my body to handle.

Cardio, calves and back tomorrow. I love using the stair climber with a hoodie and sweating loads. But then I get a bit more active and use the cross trainer. I can't run because of my back, but I try and do some 100m sprints at our local race track.
 

snoopen

Member
suffah said:
Need some help with pull-ups...

I can barely do 2-3 with good form, but that's not my question.

The issue is that I don't feel my back involved at all!

Pull-ups are a back exercise right? I feel it in my chest and upper arms...but nothing in my back. Am I not going high enough?

What am I doing wrong?
i struggled with pull-ups for a while.. i was at a stage where i was doing 10 reps of chin-ups quite easily and not being able to do more than 5 reps of wide grip pull-ups.

i switched to doing lat pulldowns for a few weeks to strengthen my upper back / lats and have gone back to pull-ups and finding them a lot easier.
 

X-Frame

Member
makingmusic476 said:
Alright gaf, I need some help. I've been working out regularly for a bit over a year now, and I think I've plateaued in several areas, which implies I'm doing something wrong. I also had this issue when regularly working out a few years back, which is why I eventually lost motivation and started slacking off.

My current regimen consists of an upper body workout one day, running the following day, then a day off before repeating it all over again. I usually "go until I can't go anymore", but what I've been reading on other websites (like that 100 push ups website) implies that's not a very good idea.

Here's what I do for my upper body workout:

Push-ups - 40-50 is my max, and has been my max for months.
Push-ups again with my arms stretched wider than typical, working out more of my back (at least that what it feels like) - 20 or so
bicycle ab exercise - 30-40
crunches - 20-25
leg lifts with my shoulders propped up on my elbows - 40-50
reverse crunches - 20
leg lifts with my back on the ground 40-50

Each exercise is done immediately after the previous. Then it's a five minute break before I head out to the chin up bar, and I do:

chin-ups - 15-20
pull ups with my arms stretched wide - 5-10
pull ups with my hands right above my shoulders - 5

Then I go inside and grab some dumbells to do some other tricep exercises.

Then on my run days, I just hop on a treadmill at a slight incline and jog until I can jog no more.

Obviously I'm doing something wrong, because I've been stuck in many areas at the same max for months. Am I pushing it too much? Am I doing any redundant exercises that could be doing more harm than good?

If somebody could help me streamline my plan and make it more effective, that'd be great. I'm trying to use as much of my own body weight (145 lbs) as I can, and I'm trying to workout every major upper body muscle.

Did you read the OP? First, you should take the cookie-cutter template and fill it out to post here so we can get a better idea of who you are and how to help you.

From your post above it looks like you don't have a structured program at all and are doing way too many reps in certain exercises, not loading enough (mostly only BW), missing lower body muscle groups, etc.
 
When I do tricep dips I get a mega pain in the very centre of my ribs:

1fa889d7.jpg


Do you think it's just muscles hurting? It feels like my ribs are being prized apart, I don't know if it's safe :/
 

Brolic Gaoler

formerly Alienshogun
PumpkinPie said:
When I do tricep dips I get a mega pain in the very centre of my ribs:

1fa889d7.jpg


Do you think it's just muscles hurting? It feels like my ribs are being prized apart, I don't know if it's safe :/

Prized apart?

You mean pried?

Do you stretch your chest before working chest? Dips work triceps and "lower pec." So you should feel something in your chest.
 

grumble

Member
That could be tendon issues, it's a fairly common complaint. Try doing dips with a somewhat narrower grip, or keep your elbows back a little more. Also be very smooth on the descent and ascent, jerking causes trauma to the connective tissue. Warm up before doing your heavier work sets.

If you're feeling that pain a lot right now, you may need to rest it a bit. Just take a week or two off of dips and lower chest movements to let things heal up. Up to you to gauge severity.
 
Alienshogun said:
Prized apart?

You mean pried?

Do you stretch your chest before working chest? Dips work triceps and "lower pec." So you should feel something in your chest.

From the dictionary:

prized also prised, priz·ing also pris·ing, priz·es also pris·es
To move or force with or as if with a lever; pry

:D

I think I'm just a noob and don't really know how to do the exercises properly, I think I was trying to dip too low at first, maybe I should start off easy and work towards going lower? I'm just looking for workouts I can do at home as I only have dumbells but I obviously don't want to be all arms and nothing else...it's a learning curve, I guess.

P.S. Thank you both. My stupid questions are becoming commonplace in this thread :D
 

Tater Tot

"My God... it's full of Starch!"
Went to a party yesterday and a bunch of people told me that I look like I live in the gym. That i looked a lot bigger and swole. Feels good, makes me want to keep going at it, now that other people notice results. :)
 
X-Frame said:
Did you read the OP? First, you should take the cookie-cutter template and fill it out to post here so we can get a better idea of who you are and how to help you.

From your post above it looks like you don't have a structured program at all and are doing way too many reps in certain exercises, not loading enough (mostly only BW), missing lower body muscle groups, etc.
Welp, I feel dumb. I've been following these threads off and on for a couple of years, but never actually read the OP. >_>

Age: 23

Height: 5'11

Weight: 145 lbs

Goal:

Increase general upper body strength + tone my upper body to some degree, eventually run 4 miles.

Current Training Schedule:

My current regimen consists of an upper body workout one day, running the following day, then a day off before repeating it all over again. I usually "go until I can't go anymore", but it appears that's a bad idea.

Here's what I do for my upper body workout:

Push-ups - As many as I can, and that goes for each of these exercises.
Push-ups again with my arms stretched wider than typical, working out more of my back (at least that what it feels like)
bicycle ab exercise
crunches
leg lifts with my shoulders propped up on my elbows
reverse crunches
leg lifts with my back on the ground

Each exercise is done immediately after the previous. Then it's a five minute break before I head out to the chin up bar, and I do:

chin-ups
pull ups with my arms stretched wide
pull ups with my hands right above my shoulders

Then I go inside and grab some dumbells to do some other tricep exercises.

Then on my run days, I just hop on a treadmill at a slight incline and jog until I can jog no more.

Current Training Equipment Available:

Not much. I have a bench, but it's tucked away in my dad's garage under a myriad of crap and he won't let me clear it out. I basically have my own body weight, a chin-up bar, a few adjustable dumbbells, and a treadmill at my disposal. But that's alright with me, because I love exercises that rely primarily on your own body weight.

Comments:

I haven't really gained any strength with this workout in months.
 

X-Frame

Member
Tater Tot said:
Went to a party yesterday and a bunch of people told me that I look like I live in the gym. That i looked a lot bigger and swole. Feels good, makes me want to keep going at it, now that other people notice results. :)

That's how I caught it. I went to the gym my freshmen year of college and after 2 months I gained 15 pounds and during Thanksgiving weak I saw my friends again and they thought I was on steroids.
 
makingmusic476 said:
/snip/
I haven't really gained any strength with this workout in months.


Well, I'm sure the fitness gaf regulars know more than me about things so if they disagree with me, you should probably side with them, but I'll share my 2 cents.



you aren't getting stronger because "as many of a light exercise as possible" is more of an endurance exercise. Which will make your leg muscles bigger-training in sprints or training for a 10k? the sprints. If you don't have weights and can't get them, tyou have a couple different options-

-load your body weight exercises with something like books in a backpack, or

-Find progressions to help you advance towards harder bodyweight exercises like 1-armed pushups. I believe there's a book called convict conditioning that does that, but I haven't read it.



also, you mentioned "toning" under your goals. toning doesn't exist. you can either make your muscles bigger or reduce body fat. if you want the first one, find a way to work out harder like I said above. If you want the second, diet+cardio.
 
fredrancour said:
Well, I'm sure the fitness gaf regulars know more than me about things so if they disagree with me, you should probably side with them, but I'll share my 2 cents.



you aren't getting stronger because "as many of a light exercise as possible" is more of an endurance exercise. Which will make your leg muscles bigger-training in sprints or training for a 10k? the sprints. If you don't have weights and can't get them, tyou have a couple different options-

-load your body weight exercises with something like books in a backpack, or

-Find progressions to help you advance towards harder bodyweight exercises like 1-armed pushups. I believe there's a book called convict conditioning that does that, but I haven't read it.



also, you mentioned "toning" under your goals. toning doesn't exist. you can either make your muscles bigger or reduce body fat. if you want the first one, find a way to work out harder like I said above. If you want the second, diet+cardio.

Well, looking at what I'm doing now, I think I can still use my current body weight to increase my strength simply by pacing myself better. I've been reading up on the 100 pushups program, and much of that is still beyond me (I max at 40-45 at the moment), so I think I can still do a lot more with what I have.

And I realize "toning" is really just a mix of increasing muscle while decreasing fat. I'm hoping the running (the most recent addition to my workout) will help with that, plus I've been increasing my veggie/fruit intake and decreasing the carbs I eat lately. I've also added a lot of eggs into my diet, in place of other things. A few raw eggs in a smoothie is nice.

Thanks for the response.
 

X-Frame

Member
Has anyone read The Primal Blueprint - by Mark Sisson (Mark's Daily Apple)?

I've been liking a lot of what I've seen and read on Mark's Daily Apple and got the book and started reading and so far it's such a breath of fresh air and I can't wait to finish. I'm sensing a lifestyle change coming on as well.

I've been especially smh'ing at his introduction with the stereotypical American family compared to what families were like 10,000 years ago.
 

Carbonox

Member
Hopefully someone here can help me out and allay my worry. A week and a half ago (on a Wednesday/Thursday), I started feeling an ache/pain of sorts in my lower abdomen. At first I thought it was my groin as stretching the left groin hurt more than the right. However, it's really my lower abdomen once I felt around.

IIRC, I did go to the gym on the Wednesday that week and had football training on the Thursday and could not perform for shit as it hurt every time I would run. I figure it was my gym session on the Wednesday that did the damage and I do believe I did deadlifts then. Now I think my form is perfect (as it needs to be for some a workout) but as of the last month I've only just started getting back in to the gym properly and only did 1/2 sessions for deadlifts prior to this particular session.

Please tell me all I did was pull my abdomen a bit too much when rising with the deadlifts? I'm able to play football more comfortably now but I still feel pain at times, primarily depending on the position I sit/lay in.
 

Veezy

que?
Carbonox_Ratchet said:
Hopefully someone here can help me out and allay my worry. A week and a half ago (on a Wednesday/Thursday), I started feeling an ache/pain of sorts in my lower abdomen. At first I thought it was my groin as stretching the left groin hurt more than the right. However, it's really my lower abdomen once I felt around.

IIRC, I did go to the gym on the Wednesday that week and had football training on the Thursday and could not perform for shit as it hurt every time I would run. I figure it was my gym session on the Wednesday that did the damage and I do believe I did deadlifts then. Now I think my form is perfect (as it needs to be for some a workout) but as of the last month I've only just started getting back in to the gym properly and only did 1/2 sessions for deadlifts prior to this particular session.

Please tell me all I did was pull my abdomen a bit too much when rising with the deadlifts? I'm able to play football more comfortably now but I still feel pain at times, primarily depending on the position I sit/lay in.
Generally, a hernia will display itself as a small bulge. I'm not really confident that you can give yourself a significant abdominal injury doing deadlifts, unless you're going pretty heavy, and even then that's going to lean more towards a hernia rather then a tear.

There’s a chance you could have given yourself rhabdomyolysis (EDIT: you probably didn't), but I’d need to know what you did that day. What was your regimen?

In before, see a doctor.
 

Carbonox

Member
Couldn't I have just pulled the muscle a tad by lifting too fast/heavy without much prep?

In terms of what I did that day, I honestly cannot remember. I most likely did a variety of different things in the gym, primarily arm-based. Lat pulldowns, shoulder press, barbell exercises and of course, deadlifts. Maybe it was just the way I sat for some of these exercises?

I'm looking at how to check if I have a hernia and the only thing that matches is abdominal pain. I don't feel sick, nor do I show any of the other symptoms. I remember seeing a programme on English TV where people speak to a doctor about their problems and he'll see what is up, live. He did some thing to check for a hernia where he pushed against the person's stomach, the person would push (like taking a dump) and then he'd let go and the lump would rise through the skin. I just tried that and nowt happened. Or maybe I'm just being silly, heh.

Could it also be something to do with my diet? Maybe I haven't eaten a good combination of things over the last week and a half? But then a week and a half is a pretty consistent time period of abdominal pain.

More thoughts would be extremely helpful.
 

Veezy

que?
Carbonox_Ratchet said:
Couldn't I have just pulled the muscle a tad by lifting too fast/heavy without much prep?

In terms of what I did that day, I honestly cannot remember. I most likely did a variety of different things in the gym, primarily arm-based. Lat pulldowns, shoulder press, barbell exercises and of course, deadlifts. Maybe it was just the way I sat for some of these exercises?

I'm looking at how to check if I have a hernia and the only thing that matches is abdominal pain. I don't feel sick, nor do I show any of the other symptoms. I remember seeing a programme on English TV where people speak to a doctor about their problems and he'll see what is up, live. He did some thing to check for a hernia where he pushed against the person's stomach, the person would push (like taking a dump) and then he'd let go and the lump would rise through the skin. I just tried that and nowt happened. Or maybe I'm just being silly, heh.

Could it also be something to do with my diet? Maybe I haven't eaten a good combination of things over the last week and a half? But then a week and a half is a pretty consistent time period of abdominal pain.

More thoughts would be extremely helpful.
Sounds like you didn't do much wrong. If the pain is subsiding, you don't feel ill, and there are no lumps you're probably fine. I'd ice the area, avoid direct abdominal work, take a NSAID, and rest.
 

X-Frame

Member
Carbonox - did you used to be a moderator on the Playstation forums? (Or maybe you still are?. You look familiar.

Anyway, I don't see you pulling something in your abs from doing deadlifts as your abs are only a stabilizer during that movement and not a prime mover like glutes/lower back erectors, etc. Were you wearing a belt?

Do you have a tennis ball or something to lie on to self-massage the affected ares and see how it feels?

Obviously I am just spit-balling here and assuming it's something to do with the soft-tissue.
 

JB1981

Member
Anybody ever do spinal decompression by Putting your armpits in weight belts and hanging from them inside a rack? I am thinking of doing this and wanted some advice/opinions ??
 

X-Frame

Member
JB1981 said:
Anybody ever do spinal decompression by Putting your armpits in weight belts and hanging from them inside a rack? I am thinking of doing this and wanted some advice/opinions ??

One of the easiest ways to decompress your spine is simply to lie down. That's why when you wake up in the morning you're taller because your spinal discs have rehydrated overnight from the increased space between the vertebrae.

Check this article out, about half-way into the page, for other options to decompress your spine safely.

Conquering Enemies of the Spine (T-Nation)
 

Carbonox

Member
X-Frame said:
Carbonox - did you used to be a moderator on the Playstation forums? (Or maybe you still are?. You look familiar.

Anyway, I don't see you pulling something in your abs from doing deadlifts as your abs are only a stabilizer during that movement and not a prime mover like glutes/lower back erectors, etc. Were you wearing a belt?

Do you have a tennis ball or something to lie on to self-massage the affected ares and see how it feels?

Obviously I am just spit-balling here and assuming it's something to do with the soft-tissue.

Aye I used to work on on the SCEA site. I do recognize your name from there as well.

Nah I don't wear belts (maybe I should?). As for a tennis ball, again no.

I'm going to give the gym a miss this week and seriously consider my football training this week as well. No point doing anything that may affect my abdomen more. Football-wise I'm a lot more comfortable so the pain is slowly but surely going away.

It's just a bugger trying to figure out what happened. Is it possible to have a week and a half long stomach ache from poor diet regime?

Overall though, thanks for your advice, folks.
 

balddemon

Banned
I want to jump higher. I can already hang on a 10ft rim with two hands pretty consistently after warming up. 5' 10" - 6' (not sure lol) and 170lbs. What are some good exercises to get my vert up? Here's what I've come up with:

  • Leg press
  • High box jumps
  • Leg extensions
  • Leg pull downs
  • Anything that exercises my upper legs
  • And calf raises I guess, but from what I understand, jumping mostly comes from upper leg strength

With that in mind, which cardio would be most beneficial to that? At my gym we have stationary bikes, treadmills, ellipticals, arc trainers, and stairmasters.
 
balddemon said:
I want to jump higher. I can already hang on a 10ft rim with two hands pretty consistently after warming up. 5' 10" - 6' (not sure lol) and 170lbs. What are some good exercises to get my vert up? Here's what I've come up with:

  • Leg press
  • High box jumps
  • Leg extensions
  • Leg pull downs
  • Anything that exercises my upper legs
  • And calf raises I guess, but from what I understand, jumping mostly comes from upper leg strength

With that in mind, which cardio would be most beneficial to that? At my gym we have stationary bikes, treadmills, ellipticals, arc trainers, and stairmasters.
Look up some plyometrics workouts
 
everytime i go to the gym, i get the urge to use the versaclimber due to its obvious american gladiators reference. but then i notice only middle aged women using it.
 

MjFrancis

Member
X-Frame said:
Has anyone read The Primal Blueprint - by Mark Sisson (Mark's Daily Apple)?
I read it back in July. Overall I liked the book. It's a good thing that he doesn't take the paleo arguments to ridiculous extremes through things like his 80/20 outlook on life (if you're adhering to your diet/exercise 80% of the time you're doing fine). Last I checked my diet is 70% meat, fruits and veggies anyways. Eating paleo isn't a goal of mine, and I'm not particularly sold on a lot of the claims some proponents trumpet. The Grok mess is overused and some of the claims about toxins and such are oversold from what I've gathered, though.

If someone is looking for a levelheaded approach to the neo-paleolithic diets out there, though - The Primal Blueprint should be right up their alley.
 
Okay Fitness GAF I have read the OP and Need Some help making a routine.

Age:22

Height: 5'9
Weight: 230 :(
Goal: Lose 30 Pounds while gaining some muscle mass.

Current Training Schedule: None at the moment. Gained alot of weight after I messed up my ankle in May.

Current Training Equipment Available: I have a new membership to the YMCA so pretty much everything.

Comments: I just wanna fit into my clothes again.
 

abuC

Member
balddemon said:
I want to jump higher. I can already hang on a 10ft rim with two hands pretty consistently after warming up. 5' 10" - 6' (not sure lol) and 170lbs. What are some good exercises to get my vert up? Here's what I've come up with:

  • Leg press
  • High box jumps
  • Leg extensions
  • Leg pull downs
  • Anything that exercises my upper legs
  • And calf raises I guess, but from what I understand, jumping mostly comes from upper leg strength

With that in mind, which cardio would be most beneficial to that? At my gym we have stationary bikes, treadmills, ellipticals, arc trainers, and stairmasters.
Calf raises and squats will really help the most. What type of jumper are you, a two footed plant or running start where you jump off one leg? Work on explosion more so than just pressing heavy weights, try to move the weights quickly (controlled). I used to be able to dunk off a drop step when I was 210lbs, roughly the same height as you (6"1), try and get your wrists above the rim now, if you can you can dunk now.
 

deadbeef

Member
_dementia said:
Are there any leg exercises I can do at home without access to equipment? :(
Go to Wal-Mart, get duct tape, thick black trash bags, and cheap duffel bag. I think they sell a 3-in-1 Jeep brand set. Should be about $30-40.

Go to Home Depot/Lowe's and buy 100-150 pounds of sand. Should be a few bucks per 50 lb. Bag

Put the sand in trash bags in whatever increment you want - 10 lb, 20, lb whatever. Wrap it up in duct tape, throw it in the duffel bag.

You can squat it, press it, carry it, deadlift it, curl it, w/e.
 

Veezy

que?
So, I’ve read through “Swole,” and the nutritional guidelines are solid. Yes, he admits some of what he says is broscience. However, it’s convincing broscience and Grayskull is real deal. So, if the guy that pushed a prowler with 200lbs on it then benches 315 for reps and doesn’t have a gut tells me to eat a particular way, I’m pretty confident he knows what he’s talking about.

His guideline for eating is designed in a way that makes it easy to adjust on the fly, depending on how your progress is going. I’m not going to go into the full details, you’ll need to buy the book for that, but the basic outline is:

Six meals a day.
The first three have one protein serving and two carb servings.
The fourth and fifth meal have one protein serving and one carb serving.
The last meal has just one protein serving.

From there, you just adjust more foods for more gains or less foods for more cuts. The book discusses what are the good protein sources and the good carb sources. It’s simple, it’s easy, will work, and can be tailored to new lifters or full-fledged members of the brotherhood of steel. I particularly appreciate how it discusses why the two mainstay nutritional extremes, see food (GOMAD) diet and your Crossfitter Zone diet, don’t really work for 99% of people.

My favorite quote from the book is:

There is a constant barrage of poor quality information on the subject of mass gain on the Internet, particularly within the communities in which these individuals are likely to find themselves as strength training beginners. It is then no surprise that they end up populating the wall of the club instead of finding themselves covered in glitter, making it rain on hoards of attractive women completely incapable of resisting their sheer primal masculinity and testosterone exhaust fume pheromones (ok, so the latter is not guaranteed or anything, at least not with this book, but a strong, muscular physique is definitely going to help you in the quest for that level of swag).

If you need a solid, lifetime, nutritional guide, buy Swole. Now.
 
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