My man
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GAF-Hop |OT9/9/99| African Substitute Teachers Run NY
- Thread starter IrishNinja
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Skool Boi "24" feat. Kimosabae
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=occGRlF2YXM
ANY form of constructive criticism would be appreciated. Hell, someone tell me it's trash. I just don't want to record anything else until I'm absolutely sure I know what measures I'm going to take to improve.
Lyrics in description.
Rastafarian42
Member
" If this was 88 I would've signed to ruthless 94 woulda had em walking down death row first is when the best go hate is what the rest do voice inside my head told wet em if they test you so it's raging water season. "
Skool Boi "24" feat. Kimosabae
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=occGRlF2YXM
ANY form of constructive criticism would be appreciated. Hell, someone tell me it's trash. I just don't want to record anything else until I'm absolutely sure I know what measures I'm going to take to improve.
Lyrics in description.
Damn good, but if I have to give constructive criticism maybe just ease off of the multi-syllabic words a bit to make the flow more fluid. Great track though, will add to my whip music playlist.
THANK YOU.
#BasedDes
I'm struggling with how to approach the process of creation. I'm not musically gifted - so I'm inspired more by words and ideas when I'm writing lyrics. Very rarely does an instrumental alone inspire something, so when I write lyrics, it often tends to be without a beat in mind. Then I try to shoehorn it into a beat and it never works, due to my style of writing. This came to fruition due to the simple fact that the artist was like "I need your verse in about an hour - you'll be rapping from point A - B and I want you to do an outro". It reigned me in (though the beat was slower than I like, I managed to make it work).
I can count bars, but I have problems structuring my cadences to instrumentals in a natural way. If anyone has any ideas on how I can build a better framework in my acapella writing so I can be better prepared to fit it to an instrumental, that'd be much appreciated.
*edit*
Really want to find a way to make multi-syllable words work, and I feel it's just because I don't understand the technical aspects of the process enough. Can anyone recommend a beat they feel I would do better over?
CountBlack
Member
Really liked this song and the original by Isaiah. I wonder how he'll do for TDE. His first project is going to have to be really good to live up to expectations. Sucks they couldn't get Chance like they wanted.
THANK YOU.
#BasedDes
I'm struggling with how to approach the process of creation. I'm not musically gifted - so I'm inspired more by words and ideas when I'm writing lyrics. Very rarely does an instrumental alone inspire something, so when I write lyrics, it often tends to be without a beat in mind. Then I try to shoehorn it into a beat and it never works, due to my style of writing. This came to fruition due to the simple fact that the artist was like "I need your verse in about an hour - you'll be rapping from point A - B and I want you to do an outro". It reigned me in (though the beat was slower than I like, I managed to make it work).
I can count bars, but I have problems structuring my cadences to instrumentals in a natural way. If anyone has any ideas on how I can build a better framework in my acapella writing so I can be better prepared to fit it to an instrumental, that'd be much appreciated.
*edit*
Really want to find a way to make multi-syllable words work, and I feel it's just because I don't understand the technical aspects of the process enough.
If you aren't writing to the beat then don't be afraid to edit after the fact. Delete, change, or add words, stretch one bar to two, that kind of stuff. Nothing I ever write, even though I usually write while the instrumental is playing in the background, ever goes to finished product the same as I wrote it. I will practice it a billlion times before I record a single word and make as many edits as I can to make it flow right.
Really the number one thing for me is practicing. Just rapping the verse outloud over and over and over. And outloud is key. How a verse flows is completely different in your head or even rapped at low volume than it is rapped at high recording volume. Lines you thought worked fine become garbled or a mess. Its easy to spit a multi syllable lyrical miracle type line in your head. It's another thing entirely to get it into one bar without it becoming an incoherent mess.
Also be careful of shortened slang words. For instance if you write b4 instead of before. It seems irrelevant but it can fuck up your timing because it makes your bar visually appear to fit while in reality it is too long. It sounds stupid but it happens more often than you'd think where a line with a lot of shorthand fucks up the flow of the entire verse because it is way longer than your brain reading it thinks it is. I don't know if I explained that very well, sorry.
To be honest, does he have expectations?
man, i wish more hiphop acts would sample Tower of Power more often, really like how laid back this feels, but the rhymes have enough energy that it propels it higher than it would have gone with some sleepy ass lyrics and delivery.
Most def.
The Return of
Banned
Yea, I love how he handles the laid back beat. Something I have been asking for.
Practice? We talkin' about...
Nah, but this was insightful, thanks a lot! I guess it just boils down to me needing to focus on the art more. I'm a real scatterbrain, atm.
Do you structure your lyrics as you right them? I.e., using symbols like strokes to denote a bar ending/beginning, words you want to stress, etc, etc? I often think it helps me to write in standard bar structures but it cages my thinking. Maybe that's just a lack of discipline in me, but holding to bar structures just seems to be antithetical to how I think.
PhoenixDark
Banned
The TDE remix of Shot You Down is dope as hell. Another great Jay Rock verse, and perhaps Q's best of 2013. He pretty much says the album will come out in January lol.
I'm sure Rashad will put out a mixtape before an album. Should be dope but I don't see him having mainstream appeal. In fact none of their recent signings do. SZA, seriously?
I'm sure Rashad will put out a mixtape before an album. Should be dope but I don't see him having mainstream appeal. In fact none of their recent signings do. SZA, seriously?
The Return of
Banned
Lol Kimosabae you are so technical with it. Cracks me up. That's cool though
sigh it's definitely a problem for me. Sometimes I think myself into paralysis instead of just doing shit and going with the flow.
Jest Chillin
Member
It's been years since I rapped but as far as structure goes when actually writing out bars I found visual cues immensely helpful when writing. I typically ended my bars with a " //~ " symbol and often wrote words in a way that made me read them how they would be pronounced if the scheme required a specific pronunciation. I found that helped both when you're writing as well as when you're first learning/memorizing your own verses.
Early on I also used dashes to denote what my multi's were and constantly repeated my lines as I was writing each new bar so that the idea behind each bar would be fresh. At the same time repeating as I was writing would be the first sort of vetting process in terms of figuring out if the line really fit or if the idea behind the bar was good enough.
All that said, I never wrote entire verses unless it was to a beat or instrumental. It's just too difficult to make an acapella written verse fit with a beat unless the beat is a loop AND the verse is stiffly structured and in those cases the result is usually a pretty boring listen. Writing to the instrumental allows you to play with your flow and experiment with change ups in both your cadence and along with the beat.
Early on I also used dashes to denote what my multi's were and constantly repeated my lines as I was writing each new bar so that the idea behind each bar would be fresh. At the same time repeating as I was writing would be the first sort of vetting process in terms of figuring out if the line really fit or if the idea behind the bar was good enough.
All that said, I never wrote entire verses unless it was to a beat or instrumental. It's just too difficult to make an acapella written verse fit with a beat unless the beat is a loop AND the verse is stiffly structured and in those cases the result is usually a pretty boring listen. Writing to the instrumental allows you to play with your flow and experiment with change ups in both your cadence and along with the beat.
Rastafarian42
Member
Rock needs to drop a quality mix-tape to build toward another album.
CountBlack
Member
I can live with this statement.
The Return of
Banned
Well, I see nothing wrong with it. I just find it interesting how different our overall approach is. I can't give any tips that would help the way you go about it. It is interesting though.
I haven't listened to the track though, can't atm
I dont really use symbols. I used to write on paper but now I write on the computer and I just hit return whenever i reach the end of a bar. Althougb sometimes when I'm trying something a little more esoteric and ghostfacey that doesn't work for me. But for the most part im a pretty straight forward "heres the end of the bar, hit return and go to the next line".
Often times however, as I am going over the lines after having written them, I will find that something I wrote works better split into two bars or combined into one, so I will go back and change that. Also as far as emphasis, sometimes if there is a word I really want to stand out or if I plan on dragging it out or doing something odd with it ill give it its own line or I will put comas before and after the word. I don't really write with that kind of thing in mind though. Rather, after I have written my verse, and I am going over it outloud, I will notice certain lines or words need to be stressed more and I'll just naturally say it that way because it works to make the flow better. If I am in a rush I may bold or italicize the word/phrase to help me remember to stress it more or say it in a different way, but otherwise I trust in my experience to know how a bar should sound. I am not a good rapper by any means, I'm kind of trash to be honest. But I have been writing and recording for fun for the last 15+ years so the technical aspects I have down pretty well (getting the lyrics to be on beat, changing things up on the fly, that kind of stuff).
As far as bar structure, everyone has a different style, but rappers who ignore bar structure struggle to find much of an audience. You have to be saying something truly profound, otherwise you might as well be doing spoken word at some def jam poetry slam. If you think you can make that style work for you, that stream of consciousness style rap where you just go and don't really try to stay on beat or go bar for bar, then go for it, do what you feel comfortable with. But in my opinion (and my opinion could certainly be shit in this case) I consider that lazy rap. Part of rap is going on beat and making what you have to say flow smoothly. But thats just me, and like I said, I barely know what the fuck i'm talking about half the time.
PhoenixDark
Banned
He should have dropped one earlier this year, to capitalize off the Money Trees verse and get TDE's name out there again. I'm not sure I've ever seen a label sit back and do nothing after releasing a huge album....sure, they all went on huge tours and made money, but why not release more music? Maybe they felt 2013 was the year of Jay/Drake/Kanye/Cole/etc, and thus waiting for 2014 makes more sense.
CountBlack
Member
I think it's because they've been kinda taking turns with releases. Rock > Kendrick > Q > Soul. Idk what happened with Rocks next project but it's looking like Kendrick (GKMC) > Q (Oxymoron) > Absoul (Black lip pastor)
Rock gotta come up with something though. I saw an interview a while back and he said he's trying to change his sound a bit. Maybe do a transformation like when KDot went to Kendrick Lamar and starting making different sounding and generally better music.
PhoenixDark
Banned
he just needs to throw the "new west" sounding production (ie struggle versions of Dre beats) in the bushes and rap over the shit Kendrick raps over. Maybe get some Alchemist beats too.
Rastafarian42
Member
That could be it and since Oxy might drop in January with Black Lip Pastor probably coming some time after Rock's next up hope he has something cooked up because he's been fucking spittin every time he's made a appearance and he's gotta strike while the iron's hot.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
Kendrick>rock>the other tde rejects
Tokubetsu
Member
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
Honestly don't enjoy q and souls music outside of a couple songs.
My man.
Discotheque
Banned
Ya I already like Isaiah more than chance.
Danny Brown feels like the one who got away tho for that label. I think he's better than all of them. I ain't doing no rankings but I'll just say whenever I see an esch-like opinion on the label a crack is made in the universe. In time itself
Danny Brown feels like the one who got away tho for that label. I think he's better than all of them. I ain't doing no rankings but I'll just say whenever I see an esch-like opinion on the label a crack is made in the universe. In time itself
PhoenixDark
Banned
I'd love to hear Danny with TDE's polish. Just having someone to clean up the vocals would work wonders. He's somewhat incomprehensible on Side B of Old, at times.
Complex Shadow
Cudi Lame
WanderingWind
Mecklemore Is My Favorite Wrapper
We know why you changed your avatar
Rastafarian42
Member
DAT SHOT YOU DOWN REMIX
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