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Guys at my girlsfriends workplace hitting on her

S

Sho_Nuff82

Member
ethanny2 said:
Update: Sorry for the necro bump and late conclusion but here it is...

After my girlfriend got angry at me for eating cake at my housemates birthday party (background:my housemate is a girl who I have no interest in but have been friends with for 1 semester. When I would go out on the weekends I wouldn't know any parties so I would always go with her, but nothing ever happened and I really never even considered doing anything with her) and got angry at me because she thought I was looking at other women on Instragram we broke up and I kept my distance for a while.

Meanwhile at my house, my housemate who I have told numerous times to stop communicating with me because my girlfriend doesn't want me talking to her continues to invite me to go places and come downstairs to the first floor (where I live) and try to talk to me. I need somewhere to place the blame on losing my girlfriend (irrational I know) so I get increasingly angry at this girl and every time she tries to talk to me I am dismissive and I eventually block her on FB messanger because I don't want her in my life. I, however only blocked her on messenger, and did not know that you could had to block someone on the actual Facebook app as well. I try to do that too, but I am prompted for a login and I was angry at the time so I decide to do it later.

Flash -forward 1-2 weeks and I go back to my girlfriends house to get some stuff I left over there. I ask her if we can be friends and then try to date later once she trusts me, she agrees and we proceed to go to an arcade later that week. We had a good time and agree that we should get back to together, but I told her (2 weeks ago) that I had blocked my housemate from Facebook. She says she will only get back together with me with I show her I blocked my housemate. I show her my phone, but forgot I only blocked her on messenger and not the FB app, she proceeds to flip out. I tell her it was a mistake and I swear I thought I had her blocked , she temporarily believes me.

The next day she says she called her sister and her sister thinks that Im a liar and I didn't block her on purpose so she is convinced about that. She also uses the fact that Im a computer science major (wtf) to say that I should know how to use FB 100% so she thinks Im lying. I convince her otherwise again (somehow) and we agree to keep the relationship going and find a couples counselor to talk about this stuff.

We spend like 2 weeks together and have a great time playing video games, going out, etc... Everything seemed great. I help her move into her new place and later she tells me that she is still worried that I lied about sleeping with my housemate. She tells me about a dude at her workplace who is married to a co-worker but cheats on her with another co-worker. She imposes this situation on me, and declares that Im dating my housemate and cheating on my housemate with her, or that my housemate is cool with me sleeping with both of them. (Wtf) I tell her that shes crazy, and thats not the case. Keep in mind it is summer break and everyone (all my housemates) has left back to their respective homes so no one I know is still in this town.

She is a huge activist (for anything feminism, BLM, fair-trade anything basically) and participates in local events and has a tight knit group of activists that she regularly talks to on a group chat. There is a guy in her activist group that she has been friends with for years and they hang out/go drinking all the time. She says how much I had in common with my housemates as a reason for why I would have slept with her, I say the same thing about this guy in her activist group and she says while he is interested in her they are just friends. She also told me 1 week before I am not allowed to have any female friends anymore, I don't have that much in the first place so I thought, "okay I'll cross that bridge when I come to it". But the fucked up part in my mind is that she still has guys friends, including this guy in the activist group and the dudes at her work. Im getting angry, but I never say anything I am saving it for therapy for which we had an appointment which was a week away.

We blow over it again and go back to hanging out and playing games, like normal. I had sex with the night before (not bragging its part of the story read on), and she goes home to get ready for work later. I text her the next day if she wants to do something, she says she'll hang out with a girlfriend. I reluctantly say okay, because if Im not hanging out with her I have nothing to do (all my friends left and I am staying her just for her, I also want to go home for the summer). She then says she did not want to have sex with me last night but did anyway. I tell her she could have just told me, shes told me before and I respect her decision. She says "it doesn't matter now anyway". I ask her what she meant and she doesn't respond to me for 3 days.

After 3 days she said she just wanted some space, (understandable we spent the whole previous week together) I say okay you could have just told me. She says she still not over me and what she thinks I did with my housemate. She then says she doesn't want to date me because I am too young (she is 27 and I am 22 even though we are both college seniors) and claims I am immature. I argue my case, and she doesn't text back for another 5 days.

So here I am 5 days after, I think its over, but I want closure (Are we broken up? Why are we braking up? etc). She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
Click to expand...

This is the worst post in the history of Dating-AGE.

For anyone reading, do the exact opposite of what OP has done at every step here. No woman, no matter how beautiful, is worth this nonsense. And she's 27! All this time I thought she was college aged like OP. She's too grown to grow out of this drama life. It's who she is. Capitulating to her every jealous whim is just enabling her behavior.

SomedayTheFire said:
It's kinda weird that people are saying "date the housemate", "she wants to fuck" when she's just being nice. Like she's some inanimate object OP can just have if he wants.


Yeah, I think that too.
Click to expand...

OP doesn't even deserve the housemate as a friend. All she's done is be super supportive and social to a guy with no friends, and he's aggressively nasty to her because someone else told him to be.
 
S

scream

Member
Trojita said:
zZ6V09m.png


WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING OP.
Click to expand...
I cant stop laughing.
 
T

Triggerhappytel

Member
Stop all contact with her, apologise to your housemate you've cut off on the ex's demand and move on. Heck, if the housemate is interested, maybe hook up with her, assuming you like her?

Just get the fuck away from this irrational controlling psycho.
 
K

Kazuhira

Member
That update gave me cancer,there're hundred of girls with better mental health than your gf.
How can you tolerate this? this is emotional abuse imo.
 
E

erragal

Member
User33 said:
OP's not going to listen to any of this advice anyways, so I just hope Part 3 of this trainwreck gets even more entertaining.
Click to expand...

Part 3: Pregnancy scare, breakup, reconciliation (conveniently timed when 'hot girl' needs help with something).

Assuming this isn't fake. Tonally it's detached enough to be fake. Particularly the nonchalant recounting of going no contact on someone you had birthday cake with a few days ago and live in the same building/social circle as? Someone that sociopathic wouldn't be as easily grifted as the male character in this story has been. Also no description of the of the hot girl? Honestly op I hope this is just a middle school writing project and not your actual value system irl.
 
A

Arttemis

Member
ethanny2 said:
Update: Sorry for the necro bump and late conclusion but here it is...

After my girlfriend got angry at me for eating cake at my housemates birthday party ... we broke up and I kept my distance for a while.

what should I do?
Click to expand...
This was depressing to read.

Jest Chillin said:
Stop messaging. Stop calling. DO NOT GO TO HER HOUSE OR WORK. Just move on. Hell, head back home for the summer. That should hopefully help.



DO NOT GO TO HER HOUSE OR WORK.
Click to expand...
.
 
N

Nephtis

Member
The thread title and the update are like... Well, I don't even know.

But the gist of it is: your ex is a crazy ass bitch and you need to move the fuck on. Get your shit, wish her the best, and run as far and as fast as you can.

Also, you need to do some soul searching, dude. Like, damn.
 
S

SliceSabre

Banned
OP are you so scared of being alone that you cannot see how toxic to you this relationship is?


Let her go man, there are other fish in the sea and plenty of them aren't poisonous like this one.
 
E

esmith08734

Member
Let it go, OP. The first few months of a relationship are always the easiest. If you both can't survive now, you won't ever be able to.

Don't sell yourself short. You're 22, not 82. You'll get other chances.
 
I

Incendiary

Banned
All I got out of this was that the OP was a total asshole to his housemate. She sounds a lot cooler and more normal than the crazy Gf.
 
T

TheOfficeMut

Unconfirmed Member
Incendiary said:
All I got out of this was that the OP was a total asshole to his housemate. She sounds a lot cooler and more normal than the crazy Gf.
Click to expand...

Also my biggest takeaway. The other shit isn't too surprising to hear because I've known people to really be in psychologically abusive relationships, but treating a housemate like that when all she's done is offer to be a friend? That's pathetic.
 
B

Beartruck

Member
OP, we see in others what we see in ourselves. The fact she won't let you talk to a female friend means she can't trust herself around a male friend. Add to that all her coworkers "hitting on her", and I wouldn't be surprised if she's done the dirty on the side. Cut and run.
 
S

shingi70

Banned
So you have been so hung on your ex, you basically spurred someone just trying to be a good friend and might actually like you ina romantic way.
 
N

NeonBlack

Member
Leave her alone. She's 27 has a guy friend she goes out with and doesn't want you to say hello to your female roommate who out would be nearly impossible to not see. Think about how crazy/stupid that sounds.

shingi70 said:
So you have been so hung on your ex, you basically spurred someone just trying to be a good friend and might actually like you ina romantic way.
Click to expand...

Read this, OP. PLS I BEG YOU.
 
Ros8105

Ros8105

Member
ethanny2 said:
She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
Click to expand...
Go on your hands and knees and ask for her forgiveness. Be a good little boy.
 
M

Messofanego

Banned
ethanny2 said:
Update: Sorry for the necro bump and late conclusion but here it is...

After my girlfriend got angry at me for eating cake at my housemates birthday party (background:my housemate is a girl who I have no interest in but have been friends with for 1 semester. When I would go out on the weekends I wouldn't know any parties so I would always go with her, but nothing ever happened and I really never even considered doing anything with her) and got angry at me because she thought I was looking at other women on Instragram we broke up and I kept my distance for a while.

Meanwhile at my house, my housemate who I have told numerous times to stop communicating with me because my girlfriend doesn't want me talking to her continues to invite me to go places and come downstairs to the first floor (where I live) and try to talk to me. I need somewhere to place the blame on losing my girlfriend (irrational I know) so I get increasingly angry at this girl and every time she tries to talk to me I am dismissive and I eventually block her on FB messanger because I don't want her in my life. I, however only blocked her on messenger, and did not know that you could had to block someone on the actual Facebook app as well. I try to do that too, but I am prompted for a login and I was angry at the time so I decide to do it later.

Flash -forward 1-2 weeks and I go back to my girlfriends house to get some stuff I left over there. I ask her if we can be friends and then try to date later once she trusts me, she agrees and we proceed to go to an arcade later that week. We had a good time and agree that we should get back to together, but I told her (2 weeks ago) that I had blocked my housemate from Facebook. She says she will only get back together with me with I show her I blocked my housemate. I show her my phone, but forgot I only blocked her on messenger and not the FB app, she proceeds to flip out. I tell her it was a mistake and I swear I thought I had her blocked , she temporarily believes me.

The next day she says she called her sister and her sister thinks that Im a liar and I didn't block her on purpose so she is convinced about that. She also uses the fact that Im a computer science major (wtf) to say that I should know how to use FB 100% so she thinks Im lying. I convince her otherwise again (somehow) and we agree to keep the relationship going and find a couples counselor to talk about this stuff.

We spend like 2 weeks together and have a great time playing video games, going out, etc... Everything seemed great. I help her move into her new place and later she tells me that she is still worried that I lied about sleeping with my housemate. She tells me about a dude at her workplace who is married to a co-worker but cheats on her with another co-worker. She imposes this situation on me, and declares that Im dating my housemate and cheating on my housemate with her, or that my housemate is cool with me sleeping with both of them. (Wtf) I tell her that shes crazy, and thats not the case. Keep in mind it is summer break and everyone (all my housemates) has left back to their respective homes so no one I know is still in this town.

She is a huge activist (for anything feminism, BLM, fair-trade anything basically) and participates in local events and has a tight knit group of activists that she regularly talks to on a group chat. There is a guy in her activist group that she has been friends with for years and they hang out/go drinking all the time. She says how much I had in common with my housemates as a reason for why I would have slept with her, I say the same thing about this guy in her activist group and she says while he is interested in her they are just friends. She also told me 1 week before I am not allowed to have any female friends anymore, I don't have that much in the first place so I thought, "okay I'll cross that bridge when I come to it". But the fucked up part in my mind is that she still has guys friends, including this guy in the activist group and the dudes at her work. Im getting angry, but I never say anything I am saving it for therapy for which we had an appointment which was a week away.

We blow over it again and go back to hanging out and playing games, like normal. I had sex with the night before (not bragging its part of the story read on), and she goes home to get ready for work later. I text her the next day if she wants to do something, she says she'll hang out with a girlfriend. I reluctantly say okay, because if Im not hanging out with her I have nothing to do (all my friends left and I am staying her just for her, I also want to go home for the summer). She then says she did not want to have sex with me last night but did anyway. I tell her she could have just told me, shes told me before and I respect her decision. She says "it doesn't matter now anyway". I ask her what she meant and she doesn't respond to me for 3 days.

After 3 days she said she just wanted some space, (understandable we spent the whole previous week together) I say okay you could have just told me. She says she still not over me and what she thinks I did with my housemate. She then says she doesn't want to date me because I am too young (she is 27 and I am 22 even though we are both college seniors) and claims I am immature. I argue my case, and she doesn't text back for another 5 days.

So here I am 5 days after, I think its over, but I want closure (Are we broken up? Why are we braking up? etc). She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
Click to expand...
Ethanny2, I don't want to mince words. You are a coward who doesn't heed our advice. So I see no further point in trying to help you when you keep falling back in abusive holes. You get back with her because you're afraid of being alone especially after she's forced you to lose all your friends on accounts of extreme jealousy. Until you completely break up with this girl, you're a lost cause.
 
R

ReplacementPelican

Member
OP, you need to get out of this relationship. Its not healthy and nobody is worth belittling your self-worth for this much. Its not even just if she's cheated on you, you don't deserve to be treated like that and separated from your friends. You'll probably also need to apologize to your housemate and explain the situation to her.

I'm glad some people are getting a good chuckle out of his situation though, you all seem like lovely people. If you enjoy this story, I could tell you some crackers about female friends of mine who have been in controlling relationships like this, you'd all fall over laughing!
 
D

Dr.Acula

Banned
ethanny2 said:
So here I am 5 days after, I think its over, but I want closure (Are we broken up? Why are we braking up? etc). She will not answer any of my calls or read my messages, so I am considering going to her house (or where she works) but I don't want to seem crazy, what should I do?
Click to expand...

This is easy. B/c she is so into Facebook stuff, just change relationship status to single, and re-add roommate. That's your closure.
 
A

Adam_Roman

Member
I'm dreading OP's return with "Guys she texted me that everything's okay and we're together again as long as I wear this chastity belt that only she has a key for!"
 
P

Panzon

Member
You need Jesus OP this is pathetic. Dump that trick and go get your housemate back and see where that goes. Next time any woman tells you you're not allowed to have friends get the fuck out of that mess right away
 
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