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[Nester99]

Being “direct” is only appreciated by 25% of people. It’s hated by 75%.

you are being persevere as a hard nose dick by 75% of the people you interact with.

It’s time to change your style based on who you are dealing with.

the world has 4 types of people who all interact differently. A B C D. If your an A you can be direct to another A. But if you act like an A to C person they will react in a different way.

Understanding the Briggs Meyer personality research could really help you out.

 

[Kappa]

Yea its not fun. I got cancelled at work because I asked for a day off but I was not given it. Then i went to starbucks and ordered my usual but I got cancelled cause they said they couldn't make it and were rude about it

 

[EverydayBeast]

Was forced to resign from a custodial position personally the reason why was the manger had a sister and pushed me out for them, it wasn't fair at the time and somehow they "discovered" reasons to let me go.

Another threat from a supervisor was threatening me losing the job if I didn't keep up with their demands, it only got worse and it feels like they were coming up with reasons to get me out of there. Did the job across the board, by the book.

 

[Wvrs]

Kind of. This story does involve politics, but it's not about the politics and more about the reaction.

In my previous job I was having a smoke break with a colleague who was telling me about having a real hard time with her manager. They didn't get on, but in her mind it was all his fault and nothing to do with her.

She then told me that she couldn't believe her manager was a Tory (conservative) supporter. I asked her why that shocked her, so she told me that it's because he's mixed race and his mum is black, so she couldn't understand why he was a a member of a "racist, fascist dictatorship" (I should point out that she is an actual communist and a member of the UK communist party)

This pissed me off. I told her that her comments were pretty racist and just because he's mixed race doesn't mean he can't be conservative. She fucking hated me for saying that. She told people that I was a racist Tory supporter and she never spoke to me again. Luckily, her campaign against me failed and people just thought she was unhinged.

Being a Tory voter in the UK doesn't make you a racist. But it's a party that takes us all for fools and has led us from one crisis to the next over the last 11 years of which, remarkably, Brexit isn't even in first place.

2010, I could understand. New Labour was a lame horse. 2015 ... not a great track record, but okay. 2017?? We're in fiasco territory. 2019, you're just trying to get Brexit done and/or believe tabloid slurs about Corbyn being the second coming of Lenin.

Today? After COVID and everything that's happened with Johnson and his inept government? Well, we all have the right to choose, I guess.

 

[Days like these...]

Wrong thread

 

[DeafTourette]

Also... Be a decent human being and you won't have to be held accountable at work.

 

[Zeroing]

OP, are you really happy there? It seems like a dog eat dog culture there on your job… not healthy to anyone.

Anyway I’m my own boss! Went freelancer and it suits my artsy and creative mind.

I don’t get that being canceled ? I assume is mostly in America?

 

[GeekyDad]

OP, are you really happy there? It seems like a dog eat dog culture there on your job… not healthy to anyone.

Anyway I’m my own boss! Went freelancer and it suits my artsy and creative mind.

I don’t get that being canceled ? I assume is mostly in America?

I wasn't even familiar with the term in that context until a few months back. I think it's mostly with the younger generation. Many of them are very ambitious, don't seem eager to do a good job or care about their fellow co-workers -- just moving up and making more money. At this point, I think I know the way forward for me, and that is stability.

 

[Nobody_Important]

I have not. Kind of the opposite given my job funnily enough lol

 

[Prison Mike]

Apparently penis out Tuesday isn't a thing so I feel ya op.

 

[lethial]

Never been cancelled but I'm also not a piece of shit.

 

[hollams]

Not really cancelled, but.

We usually have an IT Christmas Party every year and somehow I get volunteered to help with the entertainment. Over the years I've done a couple of stand up skits that made fun of management and luckily nothing really came of it. A few years ago we got new management and I created multiple skits based around Office Space that was interweaved throughout the whole lunch.

I had taken headshots of our directors and put them on a cardboard cutouts so I could play as them for one particular skit. I had 2 people interviewing the directors asking them, What would you say you do here? Since I was behind the mask cutout I couldn't see their reactions, but I do remember hearing one of the directors laughing while I was portraying him. There were 7 skits in total and all of them got a good response from the crowd although there were times you could tell they thought, wow did he really go there?

I was never spoken to directly about it, but afterwards there was a directive that all skits had to be pre-approved by upper management. Also, the whole thing was video taped and I really wanted a copy since I put so much work into it so I asked multiple times, but was given the run around and never got a copy.

 

[PSlayer]

A few years ago, I've slept with a coworker that was(still is afaik) dating another coworker. Eventually she decided to stop and we cut communication(outside of work related stuff of course). Everybody in the circle of friends of that couple started to avoid me(nobody knew what happened but the were rumors of course). Luckily i got a job offer that paid 5x times my then salary for less work and i jumped ship.

 

[Peggies]

Apparently penis out Tuesday isn't a thing so I feel ya op.

What about penis out fridays? They still on? Asking for a friend.

 

[Ownage]

Based?

Bassed.

 

[Dr Kaneda]

I ask because I feel like that's kinda what's happened to me. I was out on medical leave for almost a year due to brain cancer. Went back in late June. It took me a good month and half to get my feet firmly planted back, with many doubts along the way I could sustain it, since my work is both physically and mentally exhausting. It didn't take long, though, for my direct subordinate and other department heads to clash with me.

Now, yes, it's possible I'm paranoid, or even doing things I'm not aware of, but I don't think that's it. My cancer has caused focal aware onset seizures, not any mental illness that my wife, friends, family or four of the various doctors I see regularly have brought to my attention. But I'm a very direct, no-nonsense team leader, and I call out shit (politely and professionally -- but directly and without bullshit) when I see it. I don't let that shit slide or fester.

Thing is, I don't think anyone ever expected me to come back. The tumor was so big, they thought I was gone, and gone for good. My subordinate, I suspect, expected to take my place, my pay rate, etc., and I feel her, but it just hasn't turned out that way (yet, anyway). And the other team leaders, well, they remember the kind of person I am, and the new ones were perhaps taken unaware, and it could have been a rude awaking for them.

So...lots of whining, crying, and complaining to supervisors has taken place, and even very good work friends have seemingly begun to question my integrity. Sales are way up, hours used are down, and our percentages are making the top bosses giddy, so they've left me the hell alone, and have even become accommodating to me.

tldr: Have you ever personally experienced being (or an attempt to be) cancelled at work?

Given the medical situation you went through you should know better than a lot of people that life's too short. Easy up a little on people, nothing worse than a terrible work environment. You spend the vast majority of your time at work, try and make it as pleasant for yourself and others around you. I don't know you but terms like "very direct", "no-nonsense", "call out shit", "don't let shit slide" etc.. are usually always synonyms for being a bit of a dick.

 

[Prison Mike]

What about penis out fridays? They still on? Asking for a friend.

Sounds a plan

 

[rofif]

Since you are some sort of supervisor, I expect the fucks just got used to not having anyone anyone overwatching their results and work.
So now "the bad guy who wants us to work" came back.
I've seen that happen few times. It's a usual thing in too relaxed workplace.

 

[Billbofet]

I had an odd experience a few years back. I managed a department of essentially inside sales/customer service reps. I managed them for nearly two years and we were a pretty solid team.
A new VP of Sales was hired that I reported directly to with a dotted line through this self-serving Director that I actually got along with - yet the majority of the company disliked and I had been warned about.

In a typical bi-weekly meeting between the three of us, the Director pulled out a list of issues she had with me and my team. I would say 85% of the list was bullshit or an issue under her jurisdiction, but she was really giving it to me!
I was so unprepared and shocked, I laughed and asked her to give me this list of issues to address once I could prepare. Much of the issues were around data and metrics I was being asked for on the spot, so it was next to impossible to address cold.
It was obvious she had discussed this ahead with the VP as then they both started laying into me. I politely said I would not discuss this any further and walked out of the room (probably shouldn't have). Inside I was absolutely shitting my pants feeling I had just been assassinated professionally.
I was so shocked I sat at my desk in a daze not knowing what to do, but essentially knowing I was done at the company. In the weeks up to this, they had removed a couple of other employees and were empire building, but I had always felt I was safe from this. They had made it so miserable for a few of the people that left by doing this exact this. Once they left, they would fill these positions with people the VP knew from his days at his other company that had just laid him off. To top this all off, this Director fuck knew I was on vacation the following week with my family going to Disney.

I had interviewed with another company weeks before that for a position I was really excited about, but after not hearing back for over four weeks, I felt I had no options.
Then, out of the blue, that company called and offered me the job about an hour after being thrown under the bus.

I really enjoyed that vacation. I had planned to just not come back at all after, but ended up giving a week's notice. I was treated like shit that entire week and never understood why. Then I found out they hired one of the VP's friends to replace me a couple of days later.
Such an odd end at a company that had a real family-owned feel to it.

 

[The Skull]

Understanding the Briggs Meyer personality research could really help you out.

I thought those personality types were a bunch of BS?

 

[MacReady13]

I worked at a bottle shop as the manager. The owner was my uncle (my mum's brother). My brother also worked their as well and it was a glorious time to work in that shop. Fantastic customers. Friendly area. Really loved my time.

After 2 years of working there I got married and a year later went on our honeymoon. 2 weeks into our 5 week trip my uncle dropped dead from a heart attack. I flew back with my wife to attend the funeral and went straight back to work. Only problem was, his wife took over. She was a complete bitch. Then she brought her 2 daughters in- lazy as all fuck.

I saw the writing on the wall but didn't leave straight away. My younger brother did leave. He got a job and was content. I stayed and clearly remember 1 day filling the fridges with beer out the back and looking to the counter. I saw my aunty, her eldest daughter and the guy that took over from my brother all standing and talking together. Quite symbolic to me being left out and I was effectively cancelled. I left a month later.

 

[Ionian]

Worked a job, got asked to be deputy manager. Said no during the interview. I'd lose money, was making serious bonuses.

Manager went on holidays, was made it against my will. Team thought I back-stabbed them, I had no choice. They hated me, I hated the job.

Then the boss committed suicide, absolute chaos. Me still handling most things with a new manager that spent more time updating her screensaver/FB than working.

They paid me 20k in severance (company shut down) and I spent that on the fact I had returned to college and counseling.

(Working full-time and doing a computing degree at night was torture. Did it though but christ did I learn to drink then)

 

[Torrent of Pork]

I'm a truck driver. Getting us to follow basic legal safety standards is an exercise in herding cats, let alone policing political opinions.

Cheers for the trucker shortage allowing unsafe people who have no business driving an 80,000 pound death missile on public roads.

 

[sinnergy]

I ask because I feel like that's kinda what's happened to me. I was out on medical leave for almost a year due to brain cancer. Went back in late June. It took me a good month and half to get my feet firmly planted back, with many doubts along the way I could sustain it, since my work is both physically and mentally exhausting. It didn't take long, though, for my direct subordinate and other department heads to clash with me.

Now, yes, it's possible I'm paranoid, or even doing things I'm not aware of, but I don't think that's it. My cancer has caused focal aware onset seizures, not any mental illness that my wife, friends, family or four of the various doctors I see regularly have brought to my attention. But I'm a very direct, no-nonsense team leader, and I call out shit (politely and professionally -- but directly and without bullshit) when I see it. I don't let that shit slide or fester.

Thing is, I don't think anyone ever expected me to come back. The tumor was so big, they thought I was gone, and gone for good. My subordinate, I suspect, expected to take my place, my pay rate, etc., and I feel her, but it just hasn't turned out that way (yet, anyway). And the other team leaders, well, they remember the kind of person I am, and the new ones were perhaps taken unaware, and it could have been a rude awaking for them.

So...lots of whining, crying, and complaining to supervisors has taken place, and even very good work friends have seemingly begun to question my integrity. Sales are way up, hours used are down, and our percentages are making the top bosses giddy, so they've left me the hell alone, and have even become accommodating to me.

tldr: Have you ever personally experienced being (or an attempt to be) cancelled at work?

Yes, in the end I cancelled them , found an lawyer and made sure I got enough money to get a year worth of pay, showed them basically the middle finger (worked my ass of there for 10 years) rearranged my life in that year, got a new job , started investing , started my own company, all to become less dependent. That was 2 months before COVID hit.

Felt extremely good to stand up for myself , but I had endless HR meetings , and other BS almost daily in that process, so be prepared.

 

[sinnergy]

You've come a long way from smelling like ass working at Red Lobster to owning your own restaurant. Gotta respect the hustle .

The secret is : you need to hustle in this age

 

[Days like these...]

No but I'm about to cancel my boss from Missouri of all places who out of the blue told me "Spanish" people are racist. She referred to me as Spanish. I'm Latino more specifically Mexican. I'm not getting lectured about "spanish" racism by some trash from Missouri she needs to worry about her people's racism.

 

[DeafTourette]

No but I'm about to cancel my boss from Missouri of all places who out of the blue told me "Spanish" people are racist.

Eff that pos!

 

[Fools idol]

This isn't really the definition of "cancelled," the people that work under you just don't like you, full stop.

You just described 99.9% of management roles.

Managers are disliked by the majorty of people they manage

 

[Chronicle]

You had a dream therefore ghost are real.

You are not religious but believe in spirituality and energy? Well energy is a natural part of the universe. All things have it.
You believe in spirituality? It's a fucking point of view.
You then compare God to a tyrant.

Stop thinking.

 

[Chronicle]

I'm not a dick.

 

[MikeM]

Nope. A director tried to cancel me. Demoted me from my temporary management position.

She was walked out a month later. Never forget her quote to me:
“People are like lemons. You squeeze them until there’s no more juice, then toss them out and get a new one.”

 

[gaming_again]

No but I work for a media company in London and 1% of my honest thoughts would have me fired.

I consider myself mildly on the right on most cultural issues.

It’s insane. It puts you in a subtle mental prison and I’m looking to leave asap.

 

[YCoCg]

No but I work for a media company in London and 1% of my honest thoughts would have me fired.

I consider myself mildly on the right on most cultural issues.

It’s insane. It puts you in a subtle mental prison and I’m looking to leave asap.

Apply for the news departments, they're more right leaning if you want to work in a place where you can feel open to talk about your views. Hell if you're on the harder right GBNews are always looking for staff these days.

 

[SF Kosmo]

GeekyDad - First of all, I want to say I'm sorry you went through that- ALL of it. I hope and pray the new year brings you much brighter days.


- - -

I guess you could say I dealt with a form of getting "canceled" in a way, although maybe in the opposite manner from the way people think of these days. I was let go from my job in Human Resources because I started male-to-female gender transition.

The owners are really old and almost famously against anyone that could be placed under the LGBT umbrella. Three different lesbian workers were let go for strange reasons once they were individually outed. Even one of the heads of HR was secretly married to another man but had to act straight around the higher-ups because he was terrified of getting fired.

Tennessee isn't exactly the easiest state to deal with these issues in, but it has improved a lot over the past few years.

I hope one of you sued.

 

[ReBurn]

I'm not a dick.

Are you sure?

 

[Kamina]

You had a dream therefore ghost are real.

You are not religious but believe in spirituality and energy? Well energy is a natural part of the universe. All things have it.
You believe in spirituality? It's a fucking point of view.
You then compare God to a tyrant.

Stop thinking.

I'm not a dick.

Did you have a stroke here?

 

[deathsaber]

Congrats on being a survivor. That said, I think you are just going through the growing pains of this transitionary period. While you were out for this extended period, life went on at the work place. People learned to work without you, new people who don't know you at all were hired, and now they have to adjust to you being back to get to know you, and yes, the subordinate probably thought they were all but sure to get promoted and now they are not, and there is probably resentment. But, tough shit, thats for them to deal with, as you are still kicking.

I would just say, if your work is standing for itself, and your employers emphatically approve of your work, then I wouldn't worry about things. You aren't being "canceled"- they just need to get used to you being around again (or for the first time). And as hard as it is, even if it isn't completely just or fair (obviously you didn't ask for or remotely deserved what happened) try to have some empathy for their position, just as they need to learn the same where you are concerned. It isn't easy being the new guy, and worse being the "old" new guy, but soon enough you won't be a new guy at all (again), and this will pass.