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Here's to you, Mr.-Surfin'-OBC-At-Work-And-Using-Yahoo-IM-For Hookups Man

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M

mrmyth

Member
Today we salute you, Mr.-Surfin'-OBC-At-Work-Even-Though-You're-Married-And-Using-Yahoo-IM-For-Hookups Man
(Online Booty Callin')
Trolling relentlessly for hoes even though your wife probably wouldn't approve.
(Hoe-hoppin'!)
Only you can get caught and written up for IMing at work three months ago, then kick it up a notch by doing it again, and this time with porn.
(ooooo, lookit them big titties!)
And then, to add a cherry to the sundae, you even left work on the clock to give some hoe the dong!
(Hey man, she was askin' for it!)
We know its tiring working for fifteen whole minutes in between your IM sessions. And its doubly hard remembering which name and phone number you gave out to which hoe.
(Was I Tom, Dick, or Harry??)
And why should your wife know which venereal diseases you're bringing home? What right is it of hers?
(No, bitch, I dunno why you itchin'!)
So now that you're jobless, you'll have plenty of time to screw them hoes, right?
(You got fired?? Damn, you been owned!)
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Yeah, I just tried to make the story of the dumbass I caught recently a little funnier. I had to wade through over 700 IM conversations of this shitheel fishing for pussy, so I'm a little burned out on the human condition right now. I thought it was funny.

And to the dumbass I caught,

you_suck_at_the_internet.jpg
 
D

DaCocoBrova

Finally bought a new PSP, but then pushed the demon onto someone else. Jesus.
Are you a network admin? If so, could you bring me up to speed in regards to user monitoring and what not. I've already had a machine I work on seized due to some questionable software sitting on it. I also learned that they routinely go through the cache and look for objectionable images and sh!t.

I'm not dumb enough to look at porn at work cuz frankly, it's not that urgent, but I'd like to know what I'm up against.
 
B

bishoptl

Banstick Emeritus
mrmyth said:
Yeah, I just tried to make the story of the dumbass I caught recently a little funnier. I had to wade through over 700 IM conversations of this shitheel fishing for pussy, so I'm a little burned out on the human condition right now. I thought it was funny.

And to the dumbass I caught,

you_suck_at_the_internet.jpg
Click to expand...
oh man :lol

I'd love for you to post some of those IM logs...with the names removed to protect the not-so-innocent, of course. Come on, it's time for some comedy!
 
M

mrmyth

Member
I'm not over the entire network - I'm responsible for just one branch. Now, I have no idea what most companies do, but I'm pretty much given free reign to get results. I was told to bust the guy, so I did. I used software to undelete the stuff he thought he got rid of, then I used something else to decode the Yahoo IM logs without needing his password.
In some instances I've used keyloggers to track users and get their chat/IM ID's and then change the passwords. I don't chase everyone, just the blatant fuckups. So unless I continually spotted you online, or I have to regularly clean out spyware/adware crap from your PC, you'll be fine. But once I'm on you, if there's dirt to be found, I'll use whatever necessary to find it. There's nothing worse than an ex-fuckup going after other fuckups. Plus
I stay up to date with all the tricks just covering my own online activities.

Sorry, DCB, but bigbootysistas.com wouldn't be worksafe here.
 
M

mrmyth

Member
bishoptl said:
oh man :lol

I'd love for you to post some of those IM logs...with the names removed to protect the not-so-innocent, of course. Come on, it's time for some comedy!
Click to expand...


Lemme fish through them again. There's some definate comedy, but I have to censor the identifiers.

edit- keep in mind this is a married man .....


dumbass (08:33:08 AM): how areyou??
dumbass (08:33:14 AM): sorry about last night!
some stupid hoe (08:33:26 AM): Noproblem
dumbass (08:33:28 AM): just kidd
some stupid hoe (08:33:46 AM): I just know that u where thinking of me
dumbass (08:33:50 AM): I wish I was there!'
some stupid hoe (08:34:00 AM): i wish so also
dumbass (08:34:11 AM): we both would be knocked out!
dumbass (08:34:20 AM): afterwards of course
dumbass (08:34:24 AM): lol
some stupid hoe (08:34:26 AM): yup
dumbass (08:34:37 AM): tonite??
dumbass (08:34:48 AM): how's it lookin for us??
some stupid hoe (08:35:03 AM): have the kids still
dumbass (08:35:16 AM): damn!!!!!!!!
dumbass (08:35:21 AM): 000000
dumbass (08:35:27 AM): now what???
some stupid hoe (08:35:53 AM): May be when they are asleep000000
dumbass (08:36:04 AM): that's kool
dumbass (08:36:12 AM): anytime is good for me!!
some stupid hoe (08:36:23 AM): really
dumbass (08:36:31 AM): I could come by when they're sleep if you like??
some stupid hoe (08:36:32 AM): where is ur pic
some stupid hoe (08:36:44 AM): that would be beautiful
dumbass (08:36:47 AM): what pic??
some stupid hoe (08:37:03 AM): the one that comes up in the IM
dumbass (08:37:05 AM): do you really want me to cum???
dumbass (08:37:14 AM): it's there
some stupid hoe (08:37:26 AM): All over me.. I mean yes
some stupid hoe (08:37:38 AM): I do not see it
dumbass (08:37:46 AM): you want me to cum where???
dumbass (08:37:57 AM): hold on!
some stupid hoe (08:38:24 AM): ok
some stupid hoe (08:38:29 AM): There it is
some stupid hoe (08:38:35 AM): my sexy papi
dumbass (08:38:36 AM): ok
dumbass (08:38:47 AM): you like that one better??
some stupid hoe (08:39:15 AM): What other one do u have
dumbass (08:41:07 AM): you see that one??
some stupid hoe (08:41:34 AM): sexy
dumbass (08:42:05 AM): thx
dumbass (08:42:14 AM): so what ?
some stupid hoe (08:42:19 AM): no problem
dumbass (08:42:24 AM): do you want me to cum tonite??
dumbass (08:42:31 AM): or not??
some stupid hoe (08:44:05 AM): i do, but we will have to see
dumbass (08:44:19 AM): awe mann
dumbass (08:44:26 AM): I thought it was for sure!!
dumbass (08:44:41 AM): I was lookin forward to it
dumbass (08:45:55 AM): please try
dumbass (08:45:59 AM): really hard ok??
dumbass (08:48:52 AM): heloo
dumbass (08:48:55 AM): hello
some stupid hoe (08:51:34 AM): sorry computer crashed
dumbass (08:51:53 AM): ok
dumbass (08:52:04 AM): please try
dumbass (08:52:08 AM): pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaase
some stupid hoe (08:52:13 AM): U look so damn sexy in that picture
some stupid hoe (08:52:29 AM): I will will try harder than ever before
dumbass (08:52:51 AM): yeah right!!
dumbass (08:52:59 AM): we will see how hard you try!!
some stupid hoe (08:53:03 AM): For real
dumbass (08:53:24 AM): ok
dumbass (08:53:34 AM): seeing is believing
dumbass (08:53:38 AM): lol
some stupid hoe (08:53:41 AM): true
dumbass (08:53:44 AM): show me!!
dumbass (08:53:57 AM): don't talk about it!
dumbass (08:53:59 AM): be about it
some stupid hoe (08:54:01 AM): I am trying baby
dumbass (08:54:04 AM): ok
dumbass (08:54:12 AM): hope so
dumbass (08:54:20 AM): cuz I really want to !
some stupid hoe (08:54:28 AM): I do to
dumbass (08:54:35 AM): was thinking of you last night!!
dumbass (08:54:40 AM): mann
some stupid hoe (08:54:48 AM): good or bad
dumbass (08:55:36 AM): good
dumbass (08:55:38 AM): & bad
some stupid hoe (08:55:49 AM): really
dumbass (08:55:50 AM): the bad is becuz I was home alone
some stupid hoe (08:55:56 AM): so sorry
dumbass (08:56:03 AM): the good was thinkin of being in your bed
dumbass (08:56:09 AM): lol
some stupid hoe (08:56:09 AM): If I know that I was not going to be at work today, I would have went over
dumbass (08:56:24 AM): yeah?
dumbass (08:56:28 AM): how??
some stupid hoe (08:56:29 AM): YUP!!!
dumbass (08:56:35 AM): you said you had the kids
some stupid hoe (08:57:02 AM): My mom was here, I could have just left the kids sleeping and went to your house and be back here beofre my mom
some stupid hoe (08:57:06 AM): went to work
dumbass (08:57:19 AM): oh ok
dumbass (08:57:34 AM): did you ever get your VW bak?
dumbass (08:57:42 AM): cute lil car
some stupid hoe (08:58:00 AM): no, I am driving an 87 maxima
dumbass (08:58:11 AM): oh ok
dumbass (08:58:17 AM): I remember
dumbass (08:58:28 AM): I just asked if you gt the other one back
dumbass (08:58:48 AM): so what time do they normally go to sleep??
some stupid hoe (08:58:53 AM): 10
dumbass (08:58:56 AM): oh ok
some stupid hoe (08:59:16 AM): yeah, I am an early bird on the weekdays
dumbass (08:59:21 AM): so it would be kool for me to cum when they're sleep?
dumbass (08:59:40 AM): or would that be a problem??
some stupid hoe (09:00:03 AM): no problem, we would have to be quite though
dumbass (09:02:27 AM): 000000
dumbass (09:02:37 AM): how we gonna do that??
dumbass (09:02:49 AM): you would have to be quiet!!
dumbass (09:02:51 AM): lol
dumbass (09:02:54 AM): 000000
some stupid hoe (09:04:35 AM): I know I will have to be quite
dumbass (09:04:47 AM): can you do that??
some stupid hoe (09:04:55 AM): do not know
dumbass (09:05:22 AM): if you want me to lay it on you then i don't know!!
dumbass (09:05:37 AM): who's there now???
some stupid hoe (09:06:23 AM): me and the kids
dumbass (09:06:47 AM): oh ok
dumbass (09:07:01 AM): I hope I see you tonite!!
some stupid hoe (09:07:07 AM): I hope so to
dumbass (09:07:12 AM): you can make it happen if you really want to!!
some stupid hoe (09:07:41 AM): I am trying believe me
dumbass (09:07:54 AM): ok
dumbass (09:07:59 AM): I gues I can!!
dumbass (09:08:03 AM): lol
dumbass (09:08:08 AM): naw jk
dumbass (09:08:11 AM): I know
some stupid hoe (09:08:31 AM): thank u
dumbass (09:08:40 AM): YW
dumbass (09:08:59 AM): what's your favorite???
some stupid hoe (09:09:10 AM): favorite what000000
dumbass (09:09:16 AM): duh!!!!!!!!
some stupid hoe (09:09:21 AM): on top
dumbass (09:09:23 AM): thing to do in bed!!!
dumbass (09:09:33 AM): who you or me??
some stupid hoe (09:09:36 AM): me
some stupid hoe (09:09:42 AM): and then doggie
dumbass (09:09:47 AM): then??
dumbass (09:10:08 AM): what else??
some stupid hoe (09:10:27 AM): oral
dumbass (09:10:38 AM): give or recieve?
dumbass (09:10:53 AM): which do you preferr
some stupid hoe (09:11:00 AM): both
dumbass (09:11:17 AM): shouldn't that be first??
dumbass (09:11:27 AM): or you like it afterwards??
some stupid hoe (09:11:48 AM): first, then the other stuff
dumbass (09:12:04 AM): 69????
some stupid hoe (09:12:13 AM): HELL YES
dumbass (09:12:18 AM): gooooooooood
dumbass (09:12:23 AM): can we do that??
some stupid hoe (09:12:26 AM): yup
dumbass (09:12:37 AM): you better make it happen
dumbass (09:12:43 AM): I swear!!
dumbass (09:12:53 AM): damn my dick is hard now
dumbass (09:13:12 AM): you lucky the kids are there now or I would be o my way over
some stupid hoe (09:13:13 AM): Again............LOL
dumbass (09:13:16 AM): to get that ass!!
some stupid hoe (09:13:31 AM): I wish they where not here.
dumbass (09:13:32 AM): I can't help it
some stupid hoe (09:13:37 AM): Good I like that
dumbass (09:13:46 AM): you like anal??
some stupid hoe (09:13:54 AM): Not really
dumbass (09:14:00 AM): awe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dumbass (09:14:04 AM): why not???
dumbass (09:14:09 AM): you can take it!!
some stupid hoe (09:14:16 AM): We can work our way up to that though
dumbass (09:14:23 AM): ok
dumbass (09:14:24 AM): kool
dumbass (09:14:33 AM): I will be gentle!!
dumbass (09:14:36 AM): trust me
some stupid hoe (09:14:39 AM): I am sure u will be
dumbass (09:14:45 AM): lol
some stupid hoe (09:14:56 AM): lol
dumbass (09:15:10 AM): do you swallow??
some stupid hoe (09:15:36 AM): NOPE
dumbass (09:15:47 AM): why000000
dumbass (09:16:13 AM): I can't cum in you??
some stupid hoe (09:16:48 AM): u can come on my puppies
dumbass (09:16:59 AM): on ??
some stupid hoe (09:17:06 AM): yes my tities
dumbass (09:17:06 AM): I want to cum in!!!
dumbass (09:17:21 AM): inside
some stupid hoe (09:17:35 AM): no, not on birth control
some stupid hoe (09:17:42 AM): u want a baby
dumbass (09:17:49 AM): your mouth?
dumbass (09:17:54 AM): no kids for me!
dumbass (09:17:56 AM): not yet
some stupid hoe (09:18:16 AM): maybe in the mouth
dumbass (09:18:20 AM): so I have to pull it out & spray on you ???
dumbass (09:18:31 AM): which would you preferr
some stupid hoe (09:19:29 AM): spray on me
dumbass (09:20:17 AM): I like it better inside,but I guess I can pull it out!!
dumbass (09:20:18 AM): lol
dumbass (09:20:34 AM): you are gonna get all wet up!
some stupid hoe (09:20:41 AM): yes u have 2 if u want no children
dumbass (09:20:56 AM): then Im puttin it back inside!!
some stupid hoe (09:21:01 AM): ok
dumbass (09:21:11 AM): you kool wit that
some stupid hoe (09:22:02 AM): yes
dumbass (09:23:06 AM): ok
dumbass (09:23:10 AM): I can't wait
some stupid hoe (09:23:20 AM): Me either
dumbass (09:23:35 AM): do you have my #??
some stupid hoe (09:24:18 AM): 410-4581
dumbass (09:24:38 AM): ok
dumbass (09:24:47 AM): can I call you now??
some stupid hoe (09:25:01 AM): yes
dumbass (09:25:56 AM): thx
dumbass (09:32:20 AM): you better call!!
some stupid hoe (09:32:31 AM): I will baby
dumbass (09:32:40 AM): what are you wearing??
dumbass (09:32:46 AM): what do you sleep in??
some stupid hoe (09:33:06 AM): I sllep in a t-shirt
dumbass (09:33:17 AM): and???
dumbass (09:33:21 AM): that's it??
some stupid hoe (09:33:25 AM): Right now I am wearing capris and a sleevless shirt
dumbass (09:33:27 AM): no undies??
some stupid hoe (09:33:36 AM): thongs usally
dumbass (09:33:45 AM): you sleep?
some stupid hoe (09:35:23 AM): I sleep in thongs 2
dumbass (09:35:30 AM): oh ok
dumbass (09:35:37 AM): I sleep nude
some stupid hoe (09:35:48 AM): I do sometimes
dumbass (09:35:58 AM): i like to be free
some stupid hoe (09:36:06 AM): me 2
dumbass (09:36:11 AM): kool
dumbass (09:36:29 AM): anymore pics??
dumbass (09:36:46 AM): you still got that cam?
some stupid hoe (09:36:55 AM): yes
dumbass (09:37:02 AM): let me see
some stupid hoe (09:37:19 AM): let u see what
dumbass (09:37:29 AM): smoe more pics??
dumbass (09:37:32 AM): some
some stupid hoe (09:38:20 AM): do not have any
dumbass (09:39:55 AM): ok
dumbass (09:41:26 AM): hit me up when they take a nap or go to sleep!
dumbass (09:41:38 AM): try me in the office first!!
dumbass (09:41:45 AM): if not hit me on the cell
some stupid hoe (09:42:00 AM): Cool
dumbass (09:42:07 AM): ttyl
dumbass (09:44:23 AM): are you still on
some stupid hoe (09:44:28 AM): yes
dumbass (09:44:42 AM): I have you saved & it says your off
some stupid hoe (09:44:52 AM): no,I am on
dumbass (09:44:56 AM): hey
some stupid hoe (09:45:03 AM): yes
dumbass (09:45:15 AM): can you type over here to
some stupid hoe (09:45:30 AM): over where
dumbass (09:45:34 AM): ok
dumbass (09:45:39 AM): thats why
dumbass (09:45:45 AM): I need to delete one
dumbass (09:45:48 AM): they are the same
dumbass (09:45:50 AM): lol
some stupid hoe (09:45:53 AM): oh ok
dumbass (09:46:05 AM): kool
dumbass (09:46:14 AM): hit me up later for real ok
some stupid hoe (09:46:21 AM): ok
dumbass (09:46:24 AM): bye bye
some stupid hoe (09:49:43 AM): i will call u later
dumbass (09:49:47 AM): ok
some stupid hoe (09:49:52 AM): Bye for now Sexy
dumbass (09:49:57 AM): bye babe!
dumbass (12:45:58 PM): no luck huh??
dumbass (12:46:03 PM): damn!!!!!!!!!!!
dumbass (12:46:07 PM): lol
some stupid hoe (12:46:09 PM): still up and running
dumbass (12:46:13 PM): 000000
some stupid hoe (12:46:21 PM): That is how I feel
dumbass (12:46:26 PM): whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy??????
dumbass (12:46:35 PM): 000000
some stupid hoe (12:47:35 PM): Do not cry, dry your eye here comes your mama with those 2 little guys............................LOL
dumbass (12:47:44 PM): lol
some stupid hoe (12:47:52 PM): 000000
dumbass (12:48:15 PM): you my moma
dumbass (12:48:25 PM): wit hthe 2 big girls!!
dumbass (12:48:30 PM): 000000
dumbass (12:48:42 PM): big ole big ole girls
some stupid hoe (12:48:57 PM): LOL
dumbass (12:51:23 PM): I am anxious!!!!
some stupid hoe (12:51:31 PM): me to
dumbass (12:51:33 PM): Cmon do something!!
some stupid hoe (12:51:47 PM): What
dumbass (12:51:55 PM): idonno!!
dumbass (12:52:02 PM): anything!!
some stupid hoe (12:52:03 PM): knock them over the head with bat
dumbass (12:52:08 PM): naw
dumbass (12:52:16 PM): don't do that then you'd be in jail
some stupid hoe (12:52:18 PM): just joking
dumbass (12:56:06 PM): what are you dooing??
some stupid hoe (12:56:18 PM): Playing
dumbass (12:56:22 PM): what??
some stupid hoe (12:57:03 PM): Dots
dumbass (12:57:07 PM): ok
dumbass (12:57:16 PM): lets play pool??
some stupid hoe (12:57:41 PM): U bring the stick and the balls I have the pockets
dumbass (12:58:01 PM): ok
dumbass (01:12:02 PM): still waiting on you!!
some stupid hoe (01:12:12 PM): ok
dumbass (01:12:32 PM): we will be waiting long for you!!!!
dumbass (01:12:34 PM): lol
 
C

clipunderground

Member
mrmyth said:
Today we salute you, Mr.-Surfin'-OBC-At-Work-Even-Though-You're-Married-And-Using-Yahoo-IM-For-Hookups Man
(Online Booty Callin')
Trolling relentlessly for hoes even though your wife probably wouldn't approve.
(Hoe-hoppin'!)
Only you can get caught and written up for IMing at work three months ago, then kick it up a notch by doing it again, and this time with porn.
(ooooo, lookit them big titties!)
And then, to add a cherry to the sundae, you even left work on the clock to give some hoe the dong!
(Hey man, she was askin' for it!)
We know its tiring working for fifteen whole minutes in between your IM sessions. And its doubly hard remembering which name and phone number you gave out to which hoe.
(Was I Tom, Dick, or Harry??)
And why should your wife know which venereal diseases you're bringing home? What right is it of hers?
(No, bitch, I dunno why you itchin'!)
So now that you're jobless, you'll have plenty of time to screw them hoes, right?
(You got fired?? Damn, you been owned!)
Click to expand...


:lol Is this real?!
 
S

SyNapSe

Member
mrmyth said:
I'm not over the entire network - I'm responsible for just one branch. Now, I have no idea what most companies do, but I'm pretty much given free reign to get results. I was told to bust the guy, so I did. I used software to undelete the stuff he thought he got rid of, then I used something else to decode the Yahoo IM logs without needing his password.
In some instances I've used keyloggers to track users and get their chat/IM ID's and then change the passwords. I don't chase everyone, just the blatant fuckups. So unless I continually spotted you online, or I have to regularly clean out spyware/adware crap from your PC, you'll be fine.
Click to expand...

Hold on. So, your whole job is tracking people who may be doing innapropriate things during work hours on company equipment? That's all you do all day long?

MY GOD THAT"S AWESOME! It's like your part of the Gestapo or something..
 
M

mrmyth

Member
SyNapSe said:
Hold on. So, your whole job is tracking people who may be doing innapropriate things during work hours on company equipment? That's all you do all day long?

MY GOD THAT"S AWESOME! It's like your part of the Gestapo or something..
Click to expand...


Only lately has it become a big part of my job. I do everything from hardware installs to software setup to network configuration. I manage access to multiple intranet sites. I'm all over the place.
 
M

mrmyth

Member
I think this log shows just how sensitive the dumbass is.......



another stupid hoe (11:20:12 AM): UPDATE: I missed my period for the first time in Aug. So I figured when I wen to the doctor that I was only 7 or 8 weeks. Come to find out after the doctor did an ultra sound naw I ain 7 or 8 weeks I am 17 weeks or just over 4 months. That is just weird because I this is the first time I am pregnant so I should have missed my period back in June and on July 22nd the doctor told me that I couldn't get pregnant! But such is life but other than my life how are you doin or what you doin
dumbass (11:21:08 AM): hello
dumbass (11:21:13 AM): what was all that about
another stupid hoe (11:21:33 AM): all what about?
dumbass (11:21:42 AM): the intro
another stupid hoe (11:22:06 AM): a lot of people just be hittin me up so I have to let peeps know
dumbass (11:22:32 AM): oh ok
dumbass (11:22:37 AM): where do you live??
another stupid hoe (11:22:45 AM): ************
dumbass (11:22:54 AM): are you pregnant for real
another stupid hoe (11:23:26 AM): yes
dumbass (11:23:37 AM): oh ok
another stupid hoe (11:23:57 AM): I am 17 weeks as of monday
dumbass (11:24:18 AM): oh ok
dumbass (11:24:36 AM): so that means you could do it still then right??
another stupid hoe (11:25:05 AM): do what?
dumbass (11:25:12 AM): sex
another stupid hoe (11:25:32 AM): no I can not because my doctor has told me not to
dumbass (11:25:40 AM): oh ok
dumbass (11:25:44 AM): that's too bad
another stupid hoe (11:26:13 AM): yes I know, really because I love sex so much
dumbass (11:26:39 AM): he wouldn't know if we did or not!!
dumbass (11:26:48 AM): I could cum down the this week
another stupid hoe (11:27:37 AM): man baby I want my baby and I have a really thin and underdeveloped uterous
dumbass (11:28:08 AM): oh ok
another stupid hoe (11:28:13 AM): so I could risk losing my baby if I have sex
dumbass (11:28:14 AM): so !
dumbass (11:28:32 AM): I will be gentle
another stupid hoe (11:28:52 AM): that is alright darlin
another stupid hoe (11:29:06 AM): bye
dumbass (11:29:14 AM): bye
 
M

mrmyth

Member
here's some ownage......



dumbass (07:41:27 AM): what???
dumbass (07:41:33 AM): why not???
dumbass (07:41:43 AM): so what are you gonna do now???
maybe not so stupid hoe (07:41:46 AM): i couldnt get ahold of him
dumbass (07:42:02 AM): now what???
maybe not so stupid hoe (07:42:15 AM): dont know ill figure sumtin out
dumbass (07:43:12 AM): ok
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:28:01 AM):
dumbass (08:28:29 AM): what up??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:29:00 AM): im bord
dumbass (08:29:16 AM): so what do you want to do??
dumbass (08:29:25 AM): I could cum now if you want???
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:30:14 AM): lol
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:30:18 AM): i have kids im watching
dumbass (08:31:11 AM): oh ok
dumbass (08:31:14 AM): that's kool
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:31:28 AM): ya
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:31:30 AM): i guess
dumbass (08:31:54 AM): so how are you gonna do this Sat??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:32:17 AM): it wont be hard
dumbass (08:32:51 AM): you can get intouh wit him!! who's gonna keep the kid/s ?
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:33:19 AM): i will.. i know where he live and his momma
dumbass (08:33:49 AM): ok
dumbass (08:33:59 AM): can you drive??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:34:07 AM): im bout to buy this car
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:34:13 AM): i should have it within 3 weeks
dumbass (08:35:08 AM): oh ok
dumbass (08:35:11 AM): kool
dumbass (08:35:30 AM): what are you gonna do when you see me??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:35:39 AM): not sure
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:35:41 AM): prolly be shy
dumbass (08:35:58 AM): awe
dumbass (08:36:02 AM): don't be
dumbass (08:36:14 AM): you have nothin to be shy about!!
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:37:05 AM): i know
dumbass (08:37:43 AM): I'll lick but I don't bite!!
dumbass (08:37:46 AM): 000000
dumbass (08:37:52 AM): how about you???
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:38:05 AM): lol
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:38:10 AM): funny
dumbass (08:38:47 AM): how about you??
dumbass (08:38:50 AM): do you??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:38:59 AM): it doesnt matter
dumbass (08:39:08 AM): why not??
dumbass (08:39:15 AM): sue it doe!!
dumbass (08:39:21 AM): sure
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:39:22 AM): noo it doesnt u aint maman
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:39:51 AM): so you aint gonna get no special attention like that
dumbass (08:40:18 AM): so you sayin you going all the way to ATL wit me & no suckin & fuckin??
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:40:41 AM): ok i see your style. bye hun
dumbass (08:41:08 AM): peace!!!!
dumbass (08:41:12 AM): WHat you thought???
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:41:26 AM): lol u lookin for a STR8 up how
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:41:28 AM): that aint me
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:41:32 AM): hoe
dumbass (08:41:54 AM): sure it is
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:04 AM): lol ya right
dumbass (08:42:05 AM): you're just in denial
dumbass (08:42:09 AM): !!
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:10 AM): hell nah
dumbass (08:42:15 AM): it's all good
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:18 AM): so sleeping with 2 guys my whole life is hoeish
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:19 AM): NEVER
dumbass (08:42:28 AM): so you say!!!
dumbass (08:42:34 AM): only god & you know
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:34 AM): i know girls that have been with over 200 guys
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:42:38 AM): thas a hoe
dumbass (08:42:45 AM): I don't judge sweetie
dumbass (08:42:55 AM): you ar ewhat you are!!
dumbass (08:43:03 AM): it doesn't matter to me!
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:43:19 AM): and youre just an old man lookin for some pussy on the internet with your old wrinkly balls
dumbass (08:44:20 AM): I get moe ass the toilet seats ok
dumbass (08:44:33 AM): so you not given it don't matter
dumbass (08:44:36 AM): 000000
dumbass (08:44:43 AM): I gets mine
dumbass (08:44:45 AM): your losse
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:44:48 AM): shiiiiit. ass from yo dog...
dumbass (08:44:49 AM): lol
dumbass (08:45:00 AM): no sweetie not you!!
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:45:03 AM): whatever girl that would fuck u i woud laugh at u look like u 50
dumbass (08:45:06 AM): I don't fuck dogs
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:45:22 AM): lol riiight thas the only asss u gettin
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:45:24 AM): is from yo god
dumbass (08:45:26 AM): ok byaaaaaaaaaaaacth
dumbass (08:45:31 AM): time for you to go!!!!!
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:45:37 AM): bitch is right
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:45:40 AM): belive that hun
maybe not so stupid hoe (08:46:05 AM): now go get a life... old man


and more ownage.....



dumbass (09:10:14 AM): morning
more than she seems (09:10:26 AM): hello??
dumbass (09:10:47 AM): how are you wit your fine ass??
dumbass (09:10:50 AM): lol
more than she seems (09:11:26 AM): oh its u lol
more than she seems (09:11:41 AM): how r u handsome000000
dumbass (09:12:06 AM): I'm good
dumbass (09:12:08 AM): thx
dumbass (09:12:20 AM): so tell me something exciting !
dumbass (09:12:31 AM): about you
more than she seems (09:13:26 AM): hmm nothin much jus an average girl getting by in a big world lol
dumbass (09:13:55 AM): average???
dumbass (09:14:01 AM): 000000
dumbass (09:14:11 AM): you are beyond that
dumbass (09:14:23 AM): do you have any more pics
more than she seems (09:14:30 AM): ha ha no im really not lol but thanku
dumbass (09:15:01 AM): no more pics?
more than she seems (09:16:19 AM): yea but there a lil embarrasing there of body parts lol
more than she seems (09:16:26 AM): u have any other pics
dumbass (09:16:47 AM): that's fine!!
dumbass (09:16:54 AM): You have nice body parts
more than she seems (09:17:46 AM): 000000
more than she seems (09:17:52 AM): u have any other pics?
dumbass (09:18:00 AM): yep
dumbass (09:18:05 AM): I'll trade wit ya
more than she seems (09:18:27 AM): 000000
more than she seems (09:19:25 AM): u have to accept the file
dumbass (09:19:33 AM): ok
dumbass (09:19:38 AM): i didi
dumbass (09:20:17 AM): nice ass
dumbass (09:20:24 AM): give me more
dumbass (09:20:36 AM): I didn't see the 1st one
more than she seems (09:21:07 AM): only sent one
dumbass (09:21:40 AM): ok
dumbass (09:21:49 AM): send more
dumbass (09:22:08 AM): how can I send mine like that!
dumbass (09:22:11 AM): I forgot
more than she seems (09:22:48 AM): click send file or jus send to my yahoo acct
more than she seems (09:23:26 AM): u have to send to my email ur behind a firewall lol
dumbass (09:24:19 AM): ok
dumbass (09:24:39 AM): send me more
dumbass (09:27:26 AM): relly nice
dumbass (09:27:30 AM): ooopps
dumbass (09:27:32 AM): really
dumbass (09:27:34 AM): lol
dumbass (09:27:46 AM): you got me disfunctional over here
more than she seems (09:28:58 AM): glad u liked
dumbass (09:29:45 AM): it won't allow me to send
dumbass (09:29:50 AM): what's wrong
more than she seems (09:29:59 AM): i dunno
dumbass (09:30:15 AM): more than she seems
dumbass (09:30:17 AM): right?
more than she seems (09:30:24 AM): yes
dumbass (09:30:32 AM): let me try again
more than she seems (09:31:38 AM): ok
dumbass (09:32:13 AM): sent
dumbass (09:32:17 AM): did you get?
dumbass (09:32:25 AM): send me more
dumbass (09:32:33 AM): don't be holding out on me now!
dumbass (09:32:41 AM): you got me sprung!!
dumbass (09:32:44 AM): lol
more than she seems (09:32:46 AM): no i havent seen ur body parts yet lol
more than she seems (09:33:59 AM): no i havent seen ur body parts yet lol
dumbass (09:35:34 AM): I don't have any like you!!
more than she seems (09:35:40 AM): 000000
dumbass (09:35:48 AM): I really hate to take pics!
dumbass (09:36:11 AM): you deserve to be in front of movie cams
dumbass (09:36:13 AM): lol
more than she seems (09:36:25 AM): ha ha not really
dumbass (09:36:37 AM): yep
dumbass (09:36:43 AM): right there wit me
more than she seems (09:36:52 AM): huh?
dumbass (09:38:32 AM): no g-shots??
more than she seems (09:38:41 AM): whats that?
dumbass (09:39:22 AM): kitty kat
more than she seems (09:40:03 AM): ok u do know im a transexual?
dumbass (09:40:24 AM): you're kidding
more than she seems (09:41:02 AM): i asked u did u read my page???
dumbass (09:42:06 AM): I did but I must have missed that
more than she seems (09:42:37 AM): first line on my page lol
dumbass (09:43:39 AM): I don't see it
dumbass (09:43:45 AM): you are playing wit me
more than she seems (09:44:04 AM): the first line on my page
dumbass (09:44:11 AM): ohh ok
dumbass (09:44:16 AM): I see it now
dumbass (09:45:02 AM): so you are really a man??
more than she seems (09:46:18 AM): no im a transexual
dumbass (09:52:26 AM): ok!
dumbass (09:52:33 AM): what does that mean now?
more than she seems (09:55:41 AM): basically im a woman with a lil summin extra
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Here's another charming one involving pimping.......



prostitute (09:57:36 AM): whats up
prostitute (09:57:56 AM): whats going on with u
prostitute (09:58:06 AM): when are u gonna hook me up huh
dumbass (09:58:21 AM): whenever you have time
prostitute (09:58:45 AM): whats do u think i'm talking about
dumbass (09:59:51 AM): what are you talking bout??
prostitute (10:00:00 AM): fucking
prostitute (10:00:16 AM): not u your not giving up nothing
prostitute (10:00:24 AM): u know what u told me your buddys
prostitute (10:00:29 AM): buddies
dumbass (10:00:59 AM): that's what Im talkin bout
dumbass (10:01:11 AM): I already put the word out!
prostitute (10:01:18 AM): yeah ok
dumbass (10:01:23 AM): I want to see how good it is first!!
dumbass (10:01:28 AM): can I get some first??
prostitute (10:01:34 AM): yeah rright
prostitute (10:01:39 AM): u gonna pay me
prostitute (10:01:52 AM): hell to the naw
prostitute (10:01:57 AM): so let someone else
dumbass (10:04:14 AM): they will believe me if I said it was the bomb
prostitute (10:04:23 AM): ok
prostitute (10:04:30 AM): u can still tell them that
prostitute (10:04:35 AM): iam the bomb
prostitute (10:04:52 AM): i have a porno on the internet
prostitute (10:05:10 AM): i thought we was doing business together
prostitute (10:05:13 AM): i guess not
dumbass (10:05:46 AM): you have to give a lil to gain alot
prostitute (10:05:52 AM): right
prostitute (10:05:56 AM): i know that
prostitute (10:05:56 AM): shit
dumbass (10:06:20 AM): ok then
prostitute (10:06:33 AM): u will get a percentage i did think i had to fuck for t=for the connect
dumbass (10:06:37 AM): so give me sum & you will gain alot
prostitute (10:06:45 AM): yeah right
prostitute (10:06:50 AM): pay me then
prostitute (10:06:59 AM): u took old girl out
prostitute (10:07:05 AM): u paid her
dumbass (10:07:17 AM): nope
prostitute (10:07:28 AM): yes u did
prostitute (10:07:38 AM): u paid the everthing right
prostitute (10:07:44 AM): u still pay for pussy
dumbass (10:07:46 AM): no she did
dumbass (10:07:51 AM): i have before
prostitute (10:08:13 AM): yeah ok
dumbass (10:08:15 AM): I go 50/50
prostitute (10:08:15 AM): so in other words fuck u and u would hook me up
prostitute (10:08:27 AM): what ever
dumbass (10:08:29 AM): yep
prostitute (10:08:44 AM): yep what
dumbass (10:08:58 AM): give me a lil
prostitute (10:08:58 AM): look hook me up with a show then i was fuck u
prostitute (10:09:09 AM): i not fucking u first
dumbass (10:09:36 AM): ok
dumbass (10:09:41 AM): what do you have to loose
prostitute (10:09:42 AM): i don't trust no nigga sorry
prostitute (10:09:55 AM): so if u can hook me up do so
prostitute (10:10:05 AM): that fuck shit is cumming anways
prostitute (10:10:11 AM): if not fuck u then
prostitute (10:10:21 AM): i not going to kiss your ass
prostitute (10:10:30 AM): i said i will give a percentage
prostitute (10:10:35 AM): i told u that
prostitute (10:10:47 AM): but if i have to fuck u i don't owe u shit
prostitute (10:10:58 AM): just like a nigga' thou
dumbass (10:11:05 AM): kool
dumbass (10:11:10 AM): it's all good
prostitute (10:11:48 AM): all good what do that mean
prostitute (10:12:12 AM): u didn't say i had to fuck u for the connect just like a nigga
dumbass (10:12:28 AM): you don't have to do jack for me!!
dumbass (10:12:40 AM): I will loose no sleep
dumbass (10:12:54 AM): you can continue doing what you've been doin
prostitute (10:13:10 AM): it cool
dumbass (10:13:13 AM): you don't need me & I don't you!!
prostitute (10:13:17 AM): smart ass
dumbass (10:13:20 AM): ya know
prostitute (10:13:28 AM): ya i know
dumbass (10:13:29 AM): no need to get an attitude bout it
prostitute (10:13:37 AM): but u want to fuck u for the infor
dumbass (10:13:38 AM): ya feel
prostitute (10:13:45 AM): yes i do
prostitute (10:13:52 AM): cause that some thirsty shit
prostitute (10:13:59 AM): fuck me and i hook u up
prostitute (10:14:14 AM): who say u going to hook me up after the fuck
prostitute (10:14:18 AM): that bullshit
prostitute (10:14:33 AM): show me and i hook u up
dumbass (10:14:39 AM): who say you gonna fuck after the pay
dumbass (10:14:44 AM): same thing
prostitute (10:14:48 AM): i said
dumbass (10:14:53 AM): I am a man on my word
prostitute (10:15:17 AM): niggas i will fuck and him it doesn't matter to me
prostitute (10:15:27 AM): your are a man of your word
dumbass (10:15:32 AM): yep
prostitute (10:15:47 AM): then why u didn't say that shit at first that i would haveto fuck u for the infor
prostitute (10:15:52 AM): phoney ass
dumbass (10:16:15 AM): ok
dumbass (10:16:20 AM): Im outty
dumbass (10:16:25 AM): have a nice day
prostitute (10:16:29 AM): u too
dumbass (10:16:34 AM): peace
prostitute (10:16:49 AM): don't forget where u come from
prostitute (10:16:57 AM): u still a nigga
dumbass (10:16:59 AM): oh I won't
prostitute (10:17:06 AM): i don't care how much u make
dumbass (10:17:08 AM): I also know where Im going
dumbass (10:17:15 AM): do you???
prostitute (10:17:16 AM): that cool
prostitute (10:17:19 AM): yes
dumbass (10:17:22 AM): kool
prostitute (10:17:24 AM): not fucking u
dumbass (10:17:27 AM): it's all good
dumbass (10:17:39 AM): you don't someone else will
dumbass (10:17:45 AM): Im sure the same for you
prostitute (10:17:48 AM): cool
dumbass (10:17:52 AM): good luck
prostitute (10:17:57 AM): i know i phoney bitch
prostitute (10:18:04 AM): i least i was real
dumbass (10:18:11 AM): me too
prostitute (10:18:18 AM): that what u looking for anyways
dumbass (10:18:18 AM): I don't pay to fuck
prostitute (10:18:26 AM): i didn't ask u
prostitute (10:18:29 AM): did i
prostitute (10:18:43 AM): i said your buddy
prostitute (10:18:58 AM): but i have to fuck u n order to fuck your buddies
dumbass (10:19:10 AM): why should I do for you if you're not willing to do for me??
prostitute (10:19:11 AM): thats wrong
prostitute (10:19:30 AM): u think i'm a damn bitch
prostitute (10:19:39 AM): do what
dumbass (10:19:39 AM): nope
prostitute (10:19:41 AM): damn
dumbass (10:19:49 AM): I don't call women bitches
dumbass (10:19:53 AM): even if needed
prostitute (10:20:00 AM): so wha
dumbass (10:20:05 AM): I respect them like I want them to respect me
prostitute (10:20:07 AM): if u did so what
prostitute (10:20:14 AM): yeah
dumbass (10:20:18 AM): I don't
prostitute (10:20:21 AM): u dont' respect me
dumbass (10:20:27 AM): i did
prostitute (10:20:32 AM): not asking me what u ask me
prostitute (10:20:36 AM): no u did
prostitute (10:20:39 AM): not
prostitute (10:20:56 AM): fuck with u later
dumbass (10:21:11 AM): ok
dumbass (10:21:13 AM): bye bye
dumbass (10:21:17 AM): gotta go now
prostitute (10:21:24 AM): peace
prostitute (10:21:36 AM): u did call anyways phoney ass
prostitute (10:21:49 AM): but u want me to fuck u
prostitute (10:21:54 AM): yeah right
dumbass (10:22:01 AM): I will get over it
dumbass (10:22:06 AM): you do the same
prostitute (10:22:18 AM): i call u
prostitute (10:22:30 AM): u dont pick up the phone
dumbass (10:22:38 AM): yes I do
prostitute (10:22:38 AM): u have fail to call me back
prostitute (10:22:40 AM): phoney ass
dumbass (10:22:47 AM): ok
prostitute (10:22:47 AM): no u dont'
dumbass (10:22:48 AM): bye
prostitute (10:22:51 AM): bye
prostitute (10:22:52 AM): shit
prostitute (10:23:00 AM): phoney ass bye
 
Grizzlyjin

Grizzlyjin

Supersonic, idiotic, disconnecting, not respecting, who would really ever wanna go and top that
You have an awesome job. You're "The Man", but you still kick ass. Great topic. :lol
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Now come to find out the dumbass was trading the nudies he received over company email. That dumbass move is about to take down at least one other employee. The Associate VP is peeved, and she's old school Cuban. Her eyes actually change color when she's pissed. Normally they're green, when I finished up my report they were a wierd shade of blue/brown.


This is going to be fun.
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Soooooo....


The official termination hearing was early this morning. (technically, the dumbass was suspended without pay until the investigation concluded)

So what was the dumbass's reaction upon being given the reason for termination?

1162828_5338.jpg

Wasn't me.


But what about this log where you give out your cell phone number?

2667291_200X150.jpg

Wasn't me!

And this one where you give out the direct extension to your desk?

haunted_mansion_large.jpg

Wasn't me?

Okay, how about when we pull up the profile in the logs on Yahoo's website, there's a picture of you trying to look sexy?

murphy.jpg

A'ight, now that one coulda been me...

You have five minutes to get the rest of the stuff out of your desk. Security will escort you.

eddie.jpg
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Just a collector/account rep. He was nowhere near as blinged as he made himself out to be, but he did play golf. The consensus is that he convinced his wife he was going to play golf when he made weekend trips as far as 300 miles away for booty. That, and he had a lot of 'family emergencies' where he'd leave work early or come in late.


The second guy I'm after now is furiously deleting shit from his PC. Too bad he can't delete the image I made of it last night and will be installing on another PC to investigate today.
 
D

DaCocoBrova

Finally bought a new PSP, but then pushed the demon onto someone else. Jesus.
The second guy I'm after now is furiously deleting shit from his PC. Too bad he can't delete the image I made of it last night and will be installing on another PC to investigate today.
Click to expand...

:lol I fucks w/ you...
 
M

mrmyth

Member
I plan to actually show the differences in the file structures between the two harddrives as proof that the user knew he had contraband and was trying to dispose of it. I want him to delete as much shit as he can. I hope he destroys the Windows installation in the process, because then thats damage to company property on top of everything else. The associate VP wants these two burned as an example to everyone else.

Second dumbass has already sent WTH is going on emails to first dumbass's company email address, which has been sole property of my manager for almost a week now. He's panicking like hell.
 
M

Miguel

Member
:lol

My Aunt's husband works as a network admin, Every few weeks when I meet up with him he gives me stories like this. :lol

Man you guys are evil....but a fucking awesome type of evil. MWWWAHAHAHAHHA!
 
M

mrmyth

Member
Hero said:
Hardcore ownage.

Are the hoes hot at least?

What kind of software tools do you use anyway?
Click to expand...



Average at best. Jobless average, with multiple kids. Jobless average, with multiple kids, still living with mom.



And I will say I've been using VNC (remote control software) to watch the second dumbass's desktop since he logged on this morning. He's steadily hanging himself by revealing his connections to the first dumbass. Other than that I don't want to say what tools, for fear they'll be subjected to workarounds.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

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