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[Baron Aloha]

I haven't posted about any personal issues on GAF since Valentine's Day (some of you may recall that thread). This is partially because not much has happened and partially because I didn't think it was interesting enough to share.

So here's the deal. I was walking my dog last week and I came across this girl walking her dog too. We both had the same kind of dog (yellow lab). We got to talking and we started realizing that we had a lot in common. We just really clicked. I asked her if she was seeing anyone and if she wouldn't mind giving me her number so that I could call her up sometime. She said she wasn't and she told me her number. Luckily it was only a couple digits off from my number so it was easy to remember.

Two days later I gave her a call and asked her if she wanted to go out and she said that she was tired and that she didn't feel like going out but she suggested that I stop by her place (which is only like 2 blocks away from mine). I show up at her place and she invites me in and gives me a tour. The first thing I notice in her living room is a PS2 and GC. I asked her if she lived with her brother and she was like "I get asked that a lot, those are mine." So I'm already thinking to myself:

"attractive?" Check.
"dog lover?" Check.
"gamer too!?!" Check.
"Holy crap...this is the perfect woman for me."

We talked some more and come to find out we both went to the same college too. A this point its starting to get really freaky how much we have in common. I left her house a few hours later and we agreed to go out on Saturday. We went out. Things were great.

I went back to her house last night and then IT happened. The news was on and it mentioned how the supreme court had elected to let the states decide on the gay marriage issue. Then she blurts out "I can't believe they aren't going to do something about that. Those liberals are demoralizing the country. Thank God George Bush is the president. He wants to ammend the constitution."

My heart litterally SANK! Now granted, I do live in an upper-middle class neighborhood where the majority of people are republicans so I shouldn't have been too surprised... but hearing those words come out of her mouth was shocking. A short time later I told her I wasn't feeling well and I headed home.

So I'm thinking about calling her tonight and telling her how I feel about what she said. I want to explain to her that politics is something that I am very passionate about and that I don't think we should take the relationship any further because quite frankly I don't think this is something I could get over... plus I'm sure that at some point I'd have to meet her family and they would make me sick too. Relationships are difficult enough sometimes without having politics get in the way. I just don't see how having a long term relationship with someone who disagrees with me on these issues could ever work out. This girl just might be the female version of Ripclawe.

Is this a good idea, a bad idea? Should I tell her a BS excuse instead of just being totally up front and telling her how I really feel? Thoughts?

 

[Willco]

Who the hell stops seeing someone over political differences? I'm a goddamned registered Republic, but a known Independent, and my dad is a socialist and my mom is a neo-con. If I were to go by your theory, I should divorce my family as well.

EDIT: btw, how old are you?

 

[Baron Aloha]

Who the hell stops seeing someone over political differences? I'm a goddamned registered Republic, but a known Independent, and my dad is a socialist and my mom is a neo-con. If I were to go by your theory, I should divorce my family as well.

I kind of gave you an abridged version of her remarks and left out a few of the more derogitory terms she used. It's not only what she said but the way she said it. It sort of reminded me of Ann Coulter.

I'm 25.

 

[btrboyev]

FHUTA, then tell her its the liberal way.

 

[Willco]

I'm assuming she's the same age, if not younger.

At this station in both of your lives, your each still developing into the person you'll be for the rest of her life. People change drastically from the early 20s to their early 30s, and there's no reason to think she might not change as well. Maybe she's still chained down by her parents' belief. Maybe she needs someone to kind of counter her beliefs, institute a little free thinking in her life.

Maybe she'll be like this forever.

Still, political differences are nothing to get completely bent out of a shape about, unless she starts saying that the government should round up all the poor people in concentration camps.

 

[pnjtony]

I agree with FHUTA and say "demoralize this shit!"

 

[Nerevar]

This girl just might be the female version of Ripclawe.

:lol

Who the hell stops seeing someone over political differences?

Uhh, anyone who's passionate about their beliefs? There are a million and one reasons why people stop seeing eachother (annoying personal flaws, religious differences, etc), and I think political differences happens to be one of the most important ones. If she's not going to change her philosophy, there's no point in trying to push the relationship because it will be unfulfilling for both of you.

And I can't believe you equated your relationship with your girlfriend with your family. You don't live with your family, you don't spend your nights with your family, and you don't have sex with your family. The relationships are going to be fundamentally different.

 

[Hooker]

Dude, you can still mold her feelings about politics to something you CAN live with.




At least try before you dismiss her. You'll be kicking yourself in the head later on

 

[belgurdo]

Hit it with fury, then kick Ripclawa out of the bed in the morning and run home

 

[DCX]

FHUTA, then tell her its the liberal way.

:lol I aprove this message.

DCX

 

[Ceb]

This so reminds me of the Seinfeld ep "The couch".

 

[DopeyFish]

In general, chosing if you like someone based on their political preference is retarded.

You just gotta say to yourself "Hey! I don't care where she swings as long as I can get in her pants!"

Do you live your life for the United States of America? Or do you live your life for you?

 

[Azih]

I'd go out with her again and say in a really serious tone that you have to tell her something really important. Look into her eyes and go "I'm... I'm a... I'm a liberal".

See what happens from there. You could easily have a relationship and just not mention politics around each other maybe. Or it could fizzle out right there.

Hell she might be testing to see what your political affiliations are, either because she really hates liberals and hopes you're not one or is trying some sorta sick twisted female mind game reverse trap.

 

[Slo]

That's an interesting conflict. You should be honest with her, but you shouldn't make a big controntation out of it. Wait until it comes up again and explain to her how you feel, maybe it will be a deal breaker for her, but then again maybe not. Don't intentionally turn your second date into a political arguement. I'm indifferent to gay marriage (none of my business really), but as a heterosexual I can't see letting an issue that doesn't directly affect me get in the way of a relationship. That would be like refusing to date a vegan because you don't share their beliefs. As long as she isn't trying to get my to give up my steaks and hamburgers, I could care less if she wants to eat nothing but grass.

 

[Cubsfan23]

Uh, when a girl blatantly invites me to come to her place, not once, but twice, then I'm not going to be watching the news. But hell, what do i know?

 

[Willco]

Uhh, anyone who's passionate about their beliefs? There are a million and one reasons why people stop seeing eachother (annoying personal flaws, religious differences, etc), and I think political differences happens to be one of the most important ones. If she's not going to change her philosophy, there's no point in trying to push the relationship because it will be unfulfilling for both of you.

She's in her fucking twenties! Her philosophy will likely change and you can't denounce a woman based on some random comment(s) made when she was potentially vunerable to the fact that they thought they apparently had everything in common.

Not seeing people based on political differences is akin to not seeing people based on religious preferences, and that's just retarded. There's nothing wrong with people who have different opinions/beliefs and it's often people who challenge your own beliefs whom are better for you. Unless they challenge your beliefs with their fist, that is.

And I can't believe you equated your relationship with your girlfriend with your family. You don't live with your family, you don't spend your nights with your family, and you don't have sex with your family. The relationships are going to be fundamentally different.

Duh, but he's not even talking about an intimiate relationship, but a friendship as well, I believe.

In general, chosing if you like someone based on their political preference is retarded.

You just gotta say to yourself "Hey! I don't care where she swings as long as I can get in her pants!"

Do you live your life for the United States of America? Or do you live your life for you?

This is probably the first time I agree with DopeyFish. Mark your e-calendars, boys and girls!

... I'm really interested to see what the general forum reaction would be if he posted a thread saying, "I can't date a Jewish/Christian/Muslim girl!" I have a feeling everyone will be more sympathetic towards JC's aim simply because this girl is some kind of Ripclawe/Ann Coulter hybrid.

 

[evil ways]

Political differences?

Pfft

At least she didn't turn out to have a penis, right?

 

[maharg]

Someone posted in another thread about how they dumped someone because she didn't believe in souls, and he felt 'she could never know love' because of it.

 

[Memles]

At least she didn't turn out to have a penis, right?

Yeah...although I was 90% sure that wasn't what the thread was about, there was definitely that option.

Personally, I think I could live with it. It might be tough, but just avoid all out confrontation and agree to disagree.

 

[Willco]

Someone posted in another thread about how they dumped someone because she didn't believe in souls, and he felt 'she could never know love' because of it.

:lol

Where is this thread? I've never seen it, but it sounds like an entertaining read.

Personally, I think I could live with it. It might be tough, but just avoid all out confrontation and agree to disagree.

Bingo!

Those happy homemaker couples where both are the same and never have any problems are always the first on the news about an underground pornography ring or some such bullshit. Either that or evil robots bent on human destruction.

 

[Outcast2004]

Stick with it, if you 2 agree on every thing life won't be very interesting together.

You need that conflict, it keeps things fresh. works for me and my wife, shes semi-relgious, I'm about the furthest thing from it. But we work through that, so can you.

 

[Forgotten Ancient]

Crazy.

I dated a girl for a short while who basically had most of the same qualities and similar interests in myself as you two have.

The only real problem was that she was a Repbulican. Her family apparently has donated a decent sum of money to the Bush campaign, and there's a picture in her living room of her father and Dubya standing together somewhere.

I cringed, but I let it go. I figured it was something that would be easy to get around...she had nice tits and an awesome body - what else could I do?

But...every time she opened her mouth I found she would say something stupid. She didn't outwardly hate homosexuals...but rather, she acted like they were her best friends in a way that was so fake I wanted to choke her. "Oh, I LOVE gay people!!!", "The poor are always so lazy", "Look at my new prada bag!". Jesus...and her nickname was "hammy"! WTF. How did I let that one happen?

Good luck with this girl though. Maybe you can get her to lighten up a bit...or maybe you can just tell her to eat a dick.

 

[FortNinety]

She's in her fucking twenties! Her philosophy will likely change and you can't denounce a woman based on some random comment(s) made when she was potentially vunerable to the fact that they thought they apparently had everything in common.

Very true.

The key to building a true lasting relationship is learning to live with differences. If something like this is going undermine everything... good luck with life.

 

[maharg]

:lol

Where is this thread? I've never seen it, but it sounds like an entertaining read.

Here. In the Monster Thread of Areligious Radicals.

 

[Willco]

..."The poor are always so lazy".

:lol

Okay, in this instance I support you tossin' this girl to the curb. There's a fine line between political and religious beliefs and idiocy.

That reminds me when Tom Brokaw said he envied homeless people since they got more sleep than he did.

Here. In the Monster Thread of Areligious Radicals.

That's a bit sad. I expected better from etiolate, but to each his own I guess.

 

[BigGreenMat]

Guys I agree that you shouldn't stop seeing someone base on political differences, but I don't think that is the case here. I don't think it is the case just because she is a republican or likes George Bush. I think it is because she said something akin to 'I hate those damn fags and can't believe anyone would let that filth ever be identified with marriage. Thank god George Bush is here to save us from those pieces of excrement!'. Does that sound political or like a personal belief of hate? I mean it is one thing to share the same ideas and ideals, but disagree on the some of the ways in which they are applied or reached. It is another to see someone express hate and avarice for something for which you think is fundamentally right or good. It is the difference between 'I think the death penalty serves as a good deterrent to crime among African American men' and 'Man I am glad we got the death penalty to kill all those thieving, murdering darkies'. Do we see the difference? Just because it happens to be a political issue in one light doesn't mean it is always a political issue.

 

[maharg]

Oh and dogs suck.

 

[Azih]

BigGreenMat:Well sure if that's what happened then that's fine, but what JC posted about what she said isn't nearly that bad.

maharg:Agreed.

 

[Willco]

"I can't believe they aren't going to do something about that. Those liberals are demoralizing the country. Thank God George Bush is the president. He wants to ammend the constitution."

=

'I hate those damn fags and can't believe anyone would let that filth ever be identified with marriage. Thank god George Bush is here to save us from those pieces of excrement!'

???

 

[pnjtony]

I can hardly be friends with someone who's republican and the only repub friends I do have, I've had since the 9th grade (I'm 26 now). My current girlfriend who i'm living with is very vocal about Bush (not liking him) and I can't imagine what it'd be like if she talked the way she does about Bush, but about liberals. I don't think I could stick around too long.

Good thing we're both on the same page.

 

[human5892]

It's one thing to learn to accept differences, but quite another to date someone whose views are fundamentally different from your own.

 

[Gattsu25]

So I'm thinking about calling her tonight and telling her how I feel about what she said. I want to explain to her that politics is something that I am very passionate about and that I don't think we should take the relationship any further because quite frankly I don't think this is something I could get over

:lol

 

[impirius]

For what it's worth, when I get into a political/moral/philosophical debate with my attractive gamer fiancee... it's kinda hot.

Maybe you should try talking about the issue with her. Make sure you're both being honest and are open to accepting new viewpoints. If she just refuses to hear anything contrary to her opinion, that would be a major issue, but if you both honestly disagree, you can have some good conversations.


(Also, if you're going to just terminate the relationship over one statement without even talking it out, I'd say you're being extremely closed-minded.)

 

[norinrad21]

hehehe silly boy.

Hit it man hit it

 

[PotatoeMasher]

But you two make a great couple!

Please reconsider!

 

[DaCocoBrova]

I'd 'lay pipe' and while doing so, tell her that she was a bad little girl for talking that Dubya crap, and that she's going to have to pay... Spank her.

 

[Kave_Man]

Yeah that seems silly. Like honestly how many times a month would you really be talking politics with this girl?

 

[DaCocoBrova]

It's not silly at all...

See, I put a lot of weight on a female's decision making. I'm getting older and want something long term and substantial. If a female makes dumb decisions (like voting for Bush), then she's flawed and should be let loose.

Fuck first tho.

 

[aoi tsuki]

To each their own. Personally, i'd put political beliefs and prejudices above personal interests (dogs and gaming) in terms of importance. Interest come and go, but those "core values" don't change overnight, and are often passed down from parents.

i'd definitely talk to her more, and gently get her to substantiate her views. Worse comes to worse, put the politics aside and spread those legs.

 

[Jim Bowie]

Wouldn't it strengthen your relationship to have something like politics to argue about? I think that having something like that would always give you something to talk about. It's one of those highly explosive topics, like religion.

 

[levious]

Who the hell stops seeing someone over political differences?

If she had said Sam Raimi was a hack and Bruce Campbell was a talentless leech then what?

 

[Nameless]

Theres always a flaw when you think you've met the "perfect" girl. In your case, atleast from my perspective, the flaw is minor. From what I've observed, some of the strongest and most succesful relations ships occur between two people with some sort of religious,political, or racial differences. Hell, take my parents; My mom swings is from New Jersey and swings towards the left, while my dad is from mississippi and swings towards the right. They've been married 21 years and i've detected no major problems what so ever....ever..

You're 25 for gawd's sake, its not like your 35 where its pretty much marriage or bust. This is the time to experiment..Honestly, what do you have to lose? Worst case scenario the chick offends the hell out of you with every other sentence, so what, move on. Or perhaps, everything else that you have in common makes for a wonderful relationship. And from the sounds of things, you'll never be short of intellectual conversation or debate. Juding soley from your post, the positives atleast on paper out weigh the negative, so at very least its worth giving it a shot.

 

[Cauliflower of Love]

"I can't believe they aren't going to do something about that. Those liberals are demoralizing the country. Thank God George Bush is the president. He wants to ammend the constitution."

=

'I hate those damn fags and can't believe anyone would let that filth ever be identified with marriage. Thank god George Bush is here to save us from those pieces of excrement!'

???

I kind of gave you an abridged version of her remarks and left out a few of the more derogitory terms she used. It's not only what she said but the way she said it. It sort of reminded me of Ann Coulter.

.

 

[Willco]

If she had said Sam Raimi was a hack and Bruce Campbell was a talentless leech then what?

Truth be told, there is a Sam Raimi test that all my prospective female friends must go through, whether it be back-to-back showings of Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness or Darkman and Spider-Man. Their reactions will be graded and their knowledge tested at a later date.

It hasn't stopped me from getting intimiate with anyone before, though.

... However, if the female in question was a complete tool like TToB and felt the need to slight such an accomplished director and actor constantly, it would present some problems.

... I kind of gave you an abridged version of her remarks and left out a few of the more derogitory terms she used. It's not only what she said but the way she said it. It sort of reminded me of Ann Coulter.

We don't know what derogatory comments she said, so it's pretty ridiculous to be guessing at this point. If she did indeed use the term "fag", she wouldn't be the first, but she'd be clearly in the wrong. That would definitely be something I say is completely out of bounds, regardless if you believe homosexuality is unethical.

 

[Koshiro]

Theres always a flaw when you think you've met the "perfect" girl. In your case, atleast from my perspective, the flaw is minor. From what I've observed, some of the strongest and most succesful relations ships occur between two people with some sort of religious,political, or racial differences. Hell, take my parents; My mom swings is from New Jersey and swings towards the left, while my dad is from mississippi and swings towards the right. They've been married 21 years and i've detected no major problems what so ever....ever..

You're 25 for gawd's sake, its not like your 35 where its pretty much marriage or bust. This is the time to experiment..Honestly, what do you have to lose? Worst case scenario the chick offends the hell out of you with every other sentence, so what, move on. Or perhaps, everything else that you have in common makes for a wonderful relationship. And from the sounds of things, you'll never be short of intellectual conversation or debate. Juding soley from your post, the positives atleast on paper out weigh the negative, so at very least its worth giving it a shot.

IAWTJM (I agree with this junior member) Seems we get a good un every so often.

And can I just say.. this is the best avatar ever.

 

[Nerevar]

Guys I agree that you shouldn't stop seeing someone base on political differences, but I don't think that is the case here. I don't think it is the case just because she is a republican or likes George Bush. I think it is because she said something akin to 'I hate those damn fags and can't believe anyone would let that filth ever be identified with marriage. Thank god George Bush is here to save us from those pieces of excrement!'.

Thank you. That was my point entirely. People can learn to live with minor differences, but vast gulfs of personal opinion are going to be far too strong for people to overcome. If she thinks gays are tools of the devil and that GWB is the savior of the American peoples, then I doubt it's going to change much, despite her "just being in her twenties". I know that people change Wilco, but I'm not blind enough to believe that someone with a deeply ingrained personal opinion like that is going to budge much.

And if he is just looking for friendship, it might work. But a relationship where something like that existed as a tension is too much.

Truth be told, there is a Sam Raimi test that all my prospective female friends must go through, whether it be back-to-back showings of Evil Dead II and Army of Darkness or Darkman and Spider-Man. Their reactions will be graded and their knowledge tested at a later date.

... However, if the female in question was a complete tool like TToB and felt the need to slight such an accomplished director and actor constantly, it would present some problems.

And you're giving me shit for saying that vast differences of political opinion are too much for a relationship to overcome?
:lol

 

[Willco]

And you're giving me shit for saying that vast differences of political opinion are too much for a relationship to overcome?
:lol

If you think I've ever stopped seeing a woman because she didn't have the same tastes as I, you're retarded because you obviously did not read what I typed.

 

[psycho_snake]

I really can't undertand why you would stop seeing her over political differences. Me and my GF have so many different opinions about people or beliefs. We talk about them and sometimes they get serious, but at the end of the day, who cares, she won't like you less for disagreeing and you shouldn't either.

 

[Donkeypuncher]

I went back to her house last night and then IT happened.

Damn. I thought you meant that you nailed her.

 

[Santo]

What are you? Some kind of liberal gurly man?!@