Interesting video on street harrassment

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As a guy with two sisters and a mom this has always driven me fucking nuts. People will look but don't do it to the point where you make someone uncomfortable. Now they won't do it when I'm around but as a little kid men would cat call my mom with me right there and it made my blood boil. Have sone fucking respect.
 
A little off-topic: a friend and I were at a bar on Halloween dressed as Batman and Scarecrow. He says to this girl, "Leave that zero and get with this hero". She looks at him and says, "That's my dad." I could feel the awkwardness from a mile away.

haha, almost the same thing happened to me, met a hot girl at a club, asked her what she was doing later, she told me to turn around and ask her mom. I look behind me and there she was staring at me :S I asked her if I was a good match for her daughter and she told me that I actually was, but that I had no chance since she was there to prevent her from going home with guys...

Anyway, I really can't comprehend the thought process of people cat calling and harassing girls on the street (or anywhere for that matter), it's really foreign to me and seems really primitive. Just looking at the comment section of the video gave me cancer, fucking victim blaming and what not.
 
Again, the definition of harassment is made to encompass everything and ends up meaning nothing.

"Hey." Throw the book at him.

The issue is undermined by people choosing to wring in things that are clearly not harassment into things that clearly are harassment.

These issues only underline how big the problem is. Imagine a society where women aren't subjected to these things. It'd be fair to assume that if one such thing did happen, they'd be flabbergasted and nonplussed, but would move on their way. Then imagine a place where it happens all the time. If a women feels she can't trust anyone approaching her, it is not right to say that she should change, but rather to see that the problem is so big that they can't even trust someone asking their time.

Fight to remove the problem at hand, and these "overreactions" that some seem to say it is, will go away.
 
A little off-topic: a friend and I were at a bar on Halloween dressed as Batman and Scarecrow. He says to this girl, "Leave that zero and get with this hero". She looks at him and says, "That's my dad." I could feel the awkwardness from a mile away.

Using a lame line stolen from Vanilla Ice probably would have led to awkwardness even if dad wasn't there.
 
They should've cut the segment with the girl at 1:40ish as she doesn't really help the video. If being catcalled by trashy people is such a big problem because of the way you dress, perhaps dress more modestly (at least for the girl at 1:40). Sorry, we don't live in a perfect world; assholes will continue being assholes.

I imagine how a few hundreds/thousand years ago some religious guys had the same discussion and came to the conclusion that they should just cover up all women from head to toe if they want to go out in public. Also, maybe force them to have a male family member with them as that usually blocks cat-calling.
There, problem solved!
 
I felt bad when I heard the "Beautiful" comment because I really can't imagine how that would interrupt or ruin my day. I guess it still falls under the category of being uninvited.
 
As a male, it's always disappointing to hear about this kind of behavior. I've never harassed a women nor had the urge to. Yes when you see someone you are attracted to it's very likely you are going to think about it. I get people taking looks at others they find attractive (I think this applies to both genders). But going beyond that and harassing another person, I just don't get that. You would just have to be a shitty person.

Also do these people have no social skills? Why would anyone want to be stared at or touched, or be talked to sexually when they don't even know who you are? Why would you even do that to a stranger?

To me this kind of stuff is strange on multiple levels. Again, I get human nature and how sexual attraction works. But it doesn't stop you from making decisions or having basic social skills or decency.

This stuff pisses me off. It should piss everyone off. As a male, these other assholes behavior is just reinforcing male stereotypes that don't have to exist, but exist because the behavior is so prevalent.

Edit: I'm referring to those that are blatantly harassing. I do understand there is a debate going on now about the subtle line between what people intend. That's out of my depth.
 
You're completely undermining the issue. Saying "hey" sexually when not in an appropriate setting is a form of harassment, yes. How many times must this be repeated?
If street harassment is a sliding scale, then saying hey is on the far low end of it. Plus, there's no strict definition of what a "sexual hey" would sound like so something like that is really open to interpretation. Context is important too.

Reasonable behavior is going to be somewhere in between "keep your eyes on your feet and speak only when spoken to" and "loud, creepy, obnoxious megadouche." Law enforcement probably needs to step in and handle the areas where it's really out of hand. Where are the exact boundaries? Who knows.
 
As a guy with two sisters and a mom this has always driven me fucking nuts. People will look but don't do it to the point where you make someone uncomfortable. Now they won't do it when I'm around but as a little kid men would cat call my mom with me right there and it made my blood boil. Have sone fucking respect.

Yeah it's really uncomfortable, now imagine how they must feel if it makes your skin crawl.
 
It's absolutely not, but many men act with women in such a way that there's a very subtle difference between harassment and what they mean to be friendly interaction.

They just need to look at it from a perspective they can understand. We've all had an evangelical religious person try and sell their religion to us. Now, there is a good chance that person has genuinely pure intentions and wants to help us, but it is still bothersome. It is unwanted. Now imagine somebody instead of trying to save your soul, feels it is their duty to tell you to tell you that they think you are attractive? Now it's lost a lot of it's nobility and is just about a man boosting his ego and acting like women need to be reinforced perpetually that they look good.
 
That doesn't excuse it.

I totally agree, harassers are scum and that behavior should never, ever be tolerated. But I think many harassers, due to deep-seated misogynistic notions about women, aren't sure what behavior is appropriate.

If your father, brothers, and uncles always say gross shit at women who walk by, you will grow up thinking it's normal. That absolutely does not excuse the behavior, though.
 
I totally agree, harassers are scum and that behavior should never, ever be tolerated. But I think many harassers, due to deep-seated misogynistic notions about women, aren't sure what behavior is appropriate.

If your father, brothers, and uncles always say gross shit at women who walk by, you will grow up thinking it's normal. That absolutely does not excuse the behavior, though.
Which is why women speaking up about it is so important.
 
I don't think it's idealistic at all. I think having to tell someone "hey they could be someone's sister" is again removing the personhood from women and establishing them as relatives or property rather than people to just treat with decency.
On topic:
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I imagine how a few hundreds/thousand years ago some religious guys had the same discussion and came to the conclusion that they should just cover up all women from head to toe if they want to go out in public. Also, maybe force them to have a male family member with them as that usually blocks cat-calling.
There, problem solved!
Hah, I thought of the same thing. It's exactly the same kind of shitty victim-blaming reasoning, taken to its "logical" conclusion.
 
The video started kind of weak using footage from movies and sitcoms about cat calling. Made me just want to stop watching right then. Then it finally started pointing out the real issue with more convincing evidence. I know my person is constantly telling me about cat calls and the like. She once described someone as "animal calling" trying to attract her. Thankfully she's not been physically molested to my knowledge.


How is it difficult to not harass women?
It's not difficult at all. I think any hetero dude will treat women differently than they treat men though so that post was kind of ridiculous.
 
So? It's still harassment.
It's not reasonable to demand that people never speak to anyone in public, so labeling a typically innocuous greeting as harassment without any qualifications or context reduces the effectiveness of the messaging. That was the whole problem with DARE. The goal was reasonable, but the messaging wasn't nuanced enough, so people tuned it out. For those edge cases, there's a lot of good discussion to be had.

For the extreme cases, I don't know what else to say. If you're a jackass, then don't be a jackass, you jackass.
 
It's not reasonable to demand that people never speak to anyone in public, so labeling a typically innocuous greeting as harassment without any qualifications or context reduces the effectiveness of the messaging. That was the whole problem with DARE. The goal was reasonable, but the messaging wasn't nuanced enough, so people tuned it out. For those edge cases, there's a lot of good discussion to be had.

For the extreme cases, I don't know what else to say. If you're a jackass, then don't be a jackass, you jackass.
Please don't out words in my mouth. I never once said no on should interact with anyone else.

I've already specified how something as simple as a greeting can be harassment.
 
Holy shit some of the posts in this thread.
I know it goes without saying, but I can only feel pure empathy for the ladies of GAF in here. (Also thanks to Liu Kang for the link to here via the Leigh Alexander thread).

One of my friends sent me this a few weeks back, which I made a note of bookmarking it. Seems highly relevant to the discussion

http://vimeo.com/91678581
 
This is relegated to cat-calling and not just observing people? I've never cat-called and never will, but damn if I can't discretely look at beautiful people on the street

It's great that these issues are getting attention. Great to see people taking a progressive stand against misogyny.
 
They should've cut the segment with the girl at 1:40ish as she doesn't really help the video. If being catcalled by trashy people is such a big problem because of the way you dress, perhaps dress more modestly (at least for the girl at 1:40). Sorry, we don't live in a perfect world; assholes will continue being assholes.

This is straight up victim-blaming, wtf dude.

She should be able to dress how the fuck she wants without her being blamed for the malicious actions of others.
 
I am not a woman so I've never experienced this but I can't understand how there are this many people making these kinds of remarks. It's like that dwarf video posted here the other week, it's like "who says this shit?" I don't want to say it's an American thing but I honestly haven't seen or heard of this sort of stuff with any of my female family or friends. Maybe we're just more racist than sexist.
 
I am not a woman so I've never experienced this but I can't understand how there are this many people making these kinds of remarks. It's like that dwarf video posted here the other week, it's like "who says this shit?" I don't want to say it's an American thing but I honestly haven't seen or heard of this sort of stuff with any of my female family or friends. Maybe we're just more racist than sexist.

Bolded is where you need to stop, do some research, then reconsider your position.

Just posted from a Facebook friend: "Let's rename this week to 'Harass [her name] on the street/train/bus Week' "

Many women are harassed on a weekly basis, if not daily. It's certainly not an American thing, either.
 
Hm, it's interesting to hear it directly from their perspective. I've been in those situations before where I see a gorgeous woman and have an urge to catcall or say something but thankfully I have never done it. I'm a lonely man, so sometimes I'm not in the right frame of mind but I still have a part of me that strongly flares up and tells me not to say anything because I know it's incredibly disrespectful.
 
This is straight up victim-blaming, wtf dude.

She should be able to dress how the fuck she wants without her being blamed for the malicious actions of others.

tbh, she's not helping her case when she calls her style kinda provocative.
pro·voc·a·tive
prəˈväkətiv/
adjective
adjective: provocative
causing annoyance, anger, or another strong reaction, especially deliberately.
"a provocative article"
synonyms: annoying, irritating, exasperating, infuriating, maddening, vexing, galling; More
antonyms: soothing, calming
arousing sexual desire or interest, especially deliberately.
synonyms: sexy, sexually arousing, sexually exciting, alluring, seductive, suggestive, inviting, tantalizing, titillating; More
antonyms: modest, decorous
Provocation is the act of provoking, doing something to get a reaction.
Before you jump on me keep in mind that I only have a problem with her language and not with the way she dresses. No one should be harassed.
 
That one chick is really attractive.
I'd probably sneak a glance (but not turn my head, that's just disrespectful.)

Only to appreciate her beauty in silence, commenting on a stranger in the street is fucking disgusting.
 
Where do you draw the line here though? Obviously catcalling is offensive but at the end of the day there is a thin line especially with certain women, with what is classed as a cat call, and what is classed as an attempt to strike up a conversation.

If I walked past a woman I find attractive and walk up to her, in a totally non threating way, speak to her with manners and remove myself if my advances are not wanted? Am I catcalling? Some women would say yes. Others would expect me to make at least that effort if was actually interested.

Its a tricky subject and one that has no definite answer.
 
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