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[royalan]

You may not know the specific cultural origin of a dashiki, but they're not exactly mysterious in this country. They're easily recognizable as cultural garments.

Oh well, I guess we have to wait for Kylie Jenner to wear one down a runway.

 

[Slayven]

You're right. Why explain it to her when you can yell and swear at her. That'll learn her...

The clerk could have not insulted the kids, insulting shit you don't understand is ok?

 

[Mael]

Like the kids are so sheltered they can't hear a bad word.
"It's not racism if it's ignorance"
"it's not racism if it's not malicious"
Dang people I'd like to know your dictionaries where racism is this kind of quantum object you can never observe.
One thing for sure with this scene is that Sandra will think twice before making fun of the clothes of any customers now.
The fact that the kids told their mother is really all you need to know about how the kids took the comment, ill intent or not.

 

[Tom Nook Sawyer]

That wouldn't change the impact it had on the mom and the kids.

Huh? A diference in perceiption absolutely would change the impact

 

[Nipo]

Dah hell, so go around being a professor or suck it up and accept abuse?

"actually my kids are wearing this to show respect for their heritage. Why does is remind you of Halloween? "

That takes five seconds and their response tells you move about the clerks intentions than yelling for five minutes. Some people really know nothing about cultures outside their own. If, after determining that is the case, I can pick between screaming and explaining the latter makes me feel better about myself.

 

[BLACK AMERICAN PSYCHO]

I don't know about this one.

White person saw a black person wearing clothes similar to their native culture, whites have been trying to native culture away from blacks and get us to assimilate for centuries. White makes intentionally disrespectful joke. Black woman gets in her ass. What is there to get?

 

[SDCowboy]

The clerk could have not insulted the kids, insulting shit you don't understand is ok?

Again, you're assuming there was malice involved. Explaining to the cashier in a calm, and firm if needed, tone gets the message across far better than going ballistic. And then maybe, just maybe, the someone just got educated on something the other person is passionate about. Teaching others instead of screaming at them, what a wild crazy idea.

 

[Brianimaniac]

In what world are negroes wearing traditional African garnets not normal or acceptable? It's common definitely common enough to avoid a racist, "oh wow look at them, they are different than me" comment.

I'm 34 years old and I've never seen anyone dressed that way in real life. Your experience is not my experience. Normal is a relative term, and in my context, it is literally not normal.

In another part of the world, it wouldn't be normal to see someone dressed in camo, but I see it every day. But me seeing it every day doesn't change the fact that it's not normal somewhere else. My experience is irrelevant to that other context.

 

[TheSpoiler]

Maybe because the issue here is likely ignorance in the first place. If someone is going to be that upset that someone doesn't know their culture, then maybe actually explain it to them. Crazy I know...

As someone who's dealt with racism, no thanks. The person wasn't asking what type of clothing they were wearing, and most snide people aren't going to listen or care about a history lesson. And the onus shouldn't be on me or any other minority to teach others about our culture. If Sandra can use the Internet or access library she can inform herself. Otherwise, it's a learning experience for her kids, even if it's rough.

 

[Slayven]

"actually my kids are wearing this to show respect for their heritage. Why does is remind you of Halloween? "

That takes five seconds and their response tells you move about the clerks intentions than yelling for five minutes. Some people really know nothing about cultures outside their own. If, after determining that is the case, I can pick between screaming and explaining the latter makes me feel better about myself.

Again, you're assuming there was malice involved. Explaining to the cashier in a calm, and firm if needed, tone gets the message across far better than going ballistic.

You assume the clerk cared enough beyond a quip. And it is fucking Sept

 

[Mael]

"actually my kids are wearing this to show respect for their heritage. Why does is remind you of Halloween? "

That takes five seconds and their response tells you move about the clerks intentions than yelling for five minutes. Some people really know nothing about cultures outside their own. If, after determining that is the case, I can pick between screaming and explaining the latter makes me feel better about myself.

Fuck that. The clerk shouldn't have commented on the clothes to begin with.
It's not an inherent duty of the black people to explain all their actions to ignorant idiots.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

She said it herself: Only understand when you get cursed out...

Anyone pretending the clerk didn't know is full of shit. People know ethnic clothing. She through she could be snide and it backfired. But let's blame the Black woman for standing up for her own.

 

[BLACK AMERICAN PSYCHO]

Maybe because the issue here is likely ignorance in the first place. If someone is going to be that upset that someone doesn't know their culture, then maybe actually explain it to them. Crazy I know...

BS, history says that whites hate our native culture and would do disgusting things and at a minimum give us shit for it when we displayed it.

 

[SDCowboy]

You assume the clerk cared enough beyond a quip. And it is fucking Sept

Ok in which case going nuts on someone still doesn't solve anything. As is almost always the case, screaming and swearing at people doesn't fix or prove anything.

 

[Vicetrailia]

Well. This situation is fine, but I don't think it matters. The clerk said something that came off as condescending, and someone whose not afraid to berate her for it did just that.

Big deal. Another adult would have not said anything, and another would have lectured calmly.

Just be careful what you say. Or if the clerk was sarcastic, make sure the other person understands that too.

 

[Brianimaniac]

You may not know the specific cultural origin of a dashiki, but they're not exactly mysterious in this country. They're easily recognizable as cultural garments.

Oh well, I guess we have to wait for Kylie Jenner to wear one down a runway.

Right, but like my example of a kilt, people know what a kilt is, but you can bet your ass you're going to get comments if you wear one. You can know what something is and have it still be unusual.

 

[Infinite]

Not going down the rabbit hole of explaining to white people how racism works. I'm out.

 

[Nepenthe]

Even if the clerk didn't mean to insult the children (although racism =/= intent), they obviously felt differently enough to inform their mom that something had happened to the point that they felt insulted. Hence she went back in and went off. I'm thinking that the clerk was probably more mean-spirited about it then what's being shown as a result.

Not going down the rabbit hole of explaining to white people how racism works. I'm out.

No; come back. We need all the help we can get. ;~;

 

[TheSpoiler]

Not going down the rabbit hole of explaining to white people how racism works. I'm out.

At this point we are explaining racism to people who are shaming this lady for not explaining racism. Like at you fucking kidding me with this?

See why it's a waste of time when most don't give a shit and won't listen? I'm out too

 

[Mammoth Jones]

BS, history says that whites hate our native culture and would do disgusting things and at a minimum give us shit for it when we displayed it.

This is a fucking fact. How the fuck this nasty as clerk getting the benefit of the doubt on this?

 

[FadedRevolution]

The lesson to be learned is don't fuck with somebody's kids. People are defensive about their kids and they will fuck you up over their kids. Y'all love to give white people the benefit of the doubt whenever racism comes along. Like y'all act like if she doesn't have an obvious nazi tattoo or Klan outfit it ain't racism. Are y'all purposely ignoring the fact that it is September? How does a trick or treat joke even make sense at this time of the year? It doesn't. So y'all can keep playing this bullshit ass "oh she was just ignorant card" but that shit didn't fly with the mother cause she wasn't buying that shit.

 

[royalan]

Right, but like my example of a kilt, people know what a kilt is, but you can bet your ass you're going to get comments if you wear one. You can know what something is and have it still be unusual.

Would they ask you if you were going trick or treating in September?

Making a lewd joke, while definitely inappropriate, isn't exactly the same as relegating someone's cultural garb to status of Halloween costume in Not-October.

Something tells me the mother and her kids wouldn't have had as much of a problem if Sandra had asked questions about the origin of their clothing if she were so curious, instead of revelling in her ignorance by asking such a stupid fucking question... and that's IF she wasn't being malicious.

 

[SimpleGamer]

Again, you're assuming there was malice involved. Explaining to the cashier in a calm, and firm if needed, tone gets the message across far better than going ballistic. And then maybe, just maybe, the someone just got educated on something the other person is passionate about. Teaching others instead of screaming at them, what a wild crazy idea.

Asking them if they were going trick or treating in September wasn't being malice?

 

[Mammoth Jones]

At this point we are explaining racism to people who are shaming this lady for not explaining racism. Like at you fucking kidding me with this?

See why it's a waste of time when most don't give a shit and won't listen? I'm out too

Don't you get it, it's Black folks job to stay humble, smile, and always take time to explain someone's fucked up ignorance and bigotry.....

 

[Slayven]

Ok in which case going nuts on someone still doesn't solve anything. As is almost always the case, screaming and swearing at people doesn't fix or prove anything.

I don't know what to tell you, except don't attack folks kids

At this point we are explaining racism to people who are shaming this lady for not explaining racism. Like at you fucking kidding me with this?

See why it's a waste of time when most don't give a shit and won't listen? I'm out too

9th dimensional tone and concern chess

 

[Mammoth Jones]

Not going down the rabbit hole of explaining to white people how racism works. I'm out.

But it's why you exist!

 

[Claude Augario]

There's nothing that brings out the respectability politics more than black people defending themselves with all the strength and passion of the free human spirit.

 

[Slayven]

But it's why you exist!

at least we don't have to shuck and jive anymore

 

[statham]

White person saw a black person wearing clothes similar to their native culture, whites have been trying to native culture away from blacks and get us to assimilate for centuries. White makes intentionally disrespectful joke. Black woman gets in her ass. What is there to get?

I don't even know who or what you talking about. like seriously. PM me.

 

[17 Seconds]

And she was right to be furious but I'm not sure how good the lesson to her kids is with the cursing and screaming.

She's even cursing at the guy on the phone.

Yell. Make a scene. Or curse out of earshot of the kids. But cursing in front of your kids is counterproductive.

oh no, not cursing!

 

[Dai101]

Uh, yeah, most adults, if they even got upset at this, would handle it in a calm and collected manner. The swearing and yelling right off the bat is not the proper way, IMO, to handle such a situation. If it bothered her that much, she should have calmly explained to the employee what the issue was, and gone from there. Treat it as a teaching experience.

In how many situations like this one have you ever been involved?

A mom that would ride for her kids like that, her kids know they better be on point or they will hear about it.

Pretty much. I know that when my ama was like this you shut up or else, Hell, i'm 38 and still know that when she's this serious you FUCKING RUN.

 

[BLACK AMERICAN PSYCHO]

Ok in which case going nuts on someone still doesn't solve anything. As is almost always the case, screaming and swearing at people doesn't fix or prove anything.

Talk shit, get hit. She didn't show interest. It is 100% obvious that they are rocking some sort of cultural garb. It's not a popular thing for whites to Wear(... Yet) so she disrespected children.

At this point we are explaining racism to people who are shaming this lady for not explaining racism. Like at you fucking kidding me with this?

See why it's a waste of time when most don't give a shit and won't listen? I'm out too

This why I don't believe in intersectionality with them.

Again, you're assuming there was malice involved. Explaining to the cashier in a calm, and firm if needed, tone gets the message across far better than going ballistic. And then maybe, just maybe, the someone just got educated on something the other person is passionate about. Teaching others instead of screaming at them, what a wild crazy idea.

White women and passive aggressiveness is something that is pretty easy for seasoned veterans to spot. She made a disrespectful joke towards black people for dressing like black people.

I don't even know who or what you talking about. like seriously. PM me.

"I don't know about this one." Sound like you weren't sure what side to chose, I'm saying the answer is obvious.

 

[blame space]

the clerk got owned plain and simple

 

[Brianimaniac]

Would they ask you if you were going trick or treating in September?

Making a lewd joke, while definitely inappropriate, isn't exactly the same as relegating someone's cultural garb to status of Halloween costume in Not-October.

Something tells me the mother and her kids wouldn't have had as much of a problem if Sandra had asked questions about the origin of their clothing if she were so curious, instead of revelling in her ignorance by asking such a stupid fucking question... and that's IF she wasn't being malicious.

I didn't read the "Halloween" part. That's definitely a problem. The only way you could even slightly justify that would be if all three kids were wearing completely different kinds of things, but with them being similar, it's clearly a cultural thing, so the woman is in the right to take offense to the Halloween costume.

 

[Stinkles]

oh no, not cursing!

I forgot I am the only parent in America who thinks you shouldn't drop loud F-bombs in front of your kids while trying to teach them life lessons. Me and my stupid sheltered upbringing.

I also forgot we were on gaf where everything is for or against.


I am against racist store employees casually insulting children.

I am against parents screaming f-bombs in front of their children.

Both of these stances can be reasonable and compatible.

Mom could even have screamed her head off and not cursed the whole time. Or better yet, done exactly the same thing she did, but left her kids outside.

 

[statham]

"I don't know about this one." Sound like you weren't sure what side to chose, I'm saying the answer is obvious.

I'm still not sure. because a person doesn't know about another religion, and made a side comment that IMO wasn't offensive?
I make small talk, IMO was making small talk, not trying to insult.

 

[psaman17]

This is a fucking fact. How the fuck this nasty as clerk getting the benefit of the doubt on this?

Because a middle aged white lady working a minimum wage job in Indiana isn't gonna be educated/cultured enough to be able to recognize every traditional ethnic clothing in the world.

She's more likely to be NOT able to identify that specific garment.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

There's nothing that brings out the respectability politics more than black people defending themselves with all the strength and passion of the free human spirit.

Never. We must remain docile and submissive at all times. Anything else is just terrible and is far more important than the actual ignorance and bigotry we face.

But in all seriousness people should tune in to what the mama said about how Black people put money into these businesses that are in the community and demand respect.

So many fucking times folks set up shop in a black neighborhoods yet express nothing but thinly veiled contempt at those same people giving them business. Seen it time and time again.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

Because a middle aged white lady working a minimum wage job in Indiana isn't gonna be educated/cultured enough to be able to recognize every traditional ethnic clothing in the world.

She's more likely to be NOT able to identify that specific garment.

Bullshit. They're clothes. She working in a Black neighborhood. And if you don't know the best thing to do is shut the fuck up and do your min wage job. Not try to be witty with a bunch of kids.

You don't have to identify a specific garment to figure out theyre "ethnic clothes" and with just a sprinkle of some god damned common sense figure it'd be best not to fuck with snide ass Halloween comments. Cmon son....

 

[royalan]

Never. We must remain docile and submissive at all times. Anything else is just terrible and is far more important than the actual ignorance and bigotry we face.

But in all seriousness people should tune in to what the mama said about how Black people put money into these businesses that are in the community and demand respect.

So many fucking times folks set up shop in a black neighborhoods yet express nothing but thinly veiled contempt at those same people giving them business. Seen it time and time again.

Right???

They were about to spend money up in that RAGGEDY motherfucka.

 

[The Faceless Master]

lets make this about that poor misunderstood caucasian woman

 

[XenodudeX]

Because a middle aged white lady working a minimum wage job in Indiana isn't gonna be educated/cultured enough to be able to recognize every traditional ethnic clothing in the world.

That's her problem. Not theirs.

 

[BLACK AMERICAN PSYCHO]

I'm still not sure. because a person doesn't know about another religion, and made a side comment that IMO wasn't offensive?

Religion? Breh I don't buy that whites are that obtuse when they love copying everything we do. She didn't have to know what it was but it being some sort of culture clothing is obvious. White people have a nasty history of doing nasty things to blacks whenever they decide to embrace their native culture or create their own identity. This problem is like 4 centuries. They don't get a benefit of the doubt in situations like these with a history like that.

 

[Breads]

And she was right to be furious but I'm not sure how good the lesson to her kids is with the cursing and screaming.

She's even cursing at the guy on the phone.

Yell. Make a scene. Or curse out of earshot of the kids. But cursing in front of your kids is counterproductive.

How dare she become indignant when defending her kids, her culture, and her community. She should have done it the right way. In a forgettable scene the idiot could have shrugged off instead of the memorable one that made them feel uncomfortable for their actions.

 

[Dai101]

lets make this about that poor misunderstood caucasian woman

Isn't ALWAYS the case? Thread going the usual path.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

lets make this about that poor misunderstood caucasian woman

It indicates who some folks empathize with more in this situation. Sad.

 

[SystemBug]

I forgot I am the only parent in America who thinks you shouldn't drop loud F-bombs in front of your kids while trying to teach them life lessons. Me and my stupid sheltered upbringing.

I also forgot we were on gaf where everything is for or against.


I am against racist store employees casually insulting children.

I am against parents screaming f-bombs in front of their children.

Both of these stances can be reasonable and compatible.

Mom could even have screamed her head off and not cursed the whole time. Or better yet, done exactly the same thing she did, but left her kids outside.

You will never have to defend your child on the basis of their skin tone, and ethnic background. You have no idea how that even really feels. There is real anger, and you are telling people to contain that anger.

This isn't a fucking late pizza delivery here.

 

[hypernima]

Because a middle aged white lady working a minimum wage job in Indiana isn't gonna be educated/cultured enough to be able to recognize every traditional ethnic clothing in the world.

She's more likely to be NOT able to identify that specific garment.

There's books you know, not like she doesn't have access.

I have learned wonders about the Zo peoples traditional garments by flipping a few pages.

 

[TheStruggler]

Jesus why is the white woman in the background filming her, can only imagine what she tweeted out with the video, smdh

 

[antonz]

Religion? Breh I don't buy that whites are that obtuse when they love copying everything we do. She didn't have to know what it was but it being some sort of culture clothing is obvious. White people have a nasty history of doing nasty things to blacks whenever they decide to embrace their native culture or create their own identity. This problem is like 4 centuries. They don't get a benefit of the doubt in situations like these with a history like that.

Please tell us more about these White Devils.