Okay, in all seriousness, if you're choosing to heat water on a stove in a pot it will take way longer to boil than choosing to use an electric kettle. My kettle is pretty average. It boils 500ml of water in about two or two and a half minutes at most. And you can boil well over a litre in most kettles, which is useful for when you have quite a few people over and there is much tea and coffee to make.
And don't quote me on this as I am not mad enough to try it, but I'm pretty sure boiling water using a microwave is both very inefficient and still takes quite a bit of time?
Plus, if you're boiling water on the stove you should be doing it in a stove kettle anyway, because they contain heat better and as such boil the water faster. And they make a cool whistling sound when they have boiled the water, which is pleasingly retro.
We still don't give a fuck about kettles. I've never, ever known anyone who owns a kettle and I'm in a pretty diverse community.