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NHL Playoffs 2017 [OT] 100 Years of Playoff Salt

C

CreeperBlocks

Banned
PlayALLtheGames said:
Oh boy, this fucking Caps team...

Not only am I not surprised at this loss, I am overjoyed after seeing the performance through three periods. Couldn't have happened to a better team of scrubs. This circus of fucking chokers and bums needs to get its ass whupped - game after game, playoff after playoff - before they realize these games don't win themselves. Their opponents are missing their best fucking player and one of the best in the league - still can't win!

As always, this team passes too fucking much and refuses to shoot. Their coach refuses to call them out on it. Every other NHL team has figured it out. They can't figure it out. They're dumb.

Seriously, fuck most of the players on this team for a while now. There's no leadership, no accountability, no resolve or toughness. These overpaid fucks skate like they're annoyed we beat Toronto and just want to get it over and done with.

Ovi cares more about his national team than the Caps, but he's a proud Putin cock-sucker, so what do you expect? I firmly believe he's past his prime.

Kuznetsov should join some fucking Cirque Du Soleil. Dude has moves; just can't score. For all those tricky little maneuvers he continues to whiff on big chances. How about the premature ejaculation in game 3 when he didn't even get a piece of the puck? Lmao! And it's another fucking Russian. Coincidence? As a Russian, I'd say no. I know Russians. They're shady.

Backstrom becomes a ghost. You honestly forget that he plays for the Caps. Backstrom?
More like BackSEAT - amirite?

Wilson is the definition of a troglodyte ("troglodyte: (especially in prehistoric times) a person who lived in a cave.") Yeah, he's a dummy. No hockey IQ or probably any IQ of which to speak. His entire, shitty persona relies on occasional poster hits but mostly wiping out power plays for retaliating when it was completely unnecessary. No bullshit: Tom Wilson once tried to fight me on the rooftop of a bar in Arlington, VA. He's a fuckin' goon.

Eller, Shatten-whatever-the-fuck, Winnick, Alzner: you suck.

Orlov: I wish I could pay a gypsy witch to curse you into becoming a shrunken doll. You're clueless. Nice own-goal ya fucking bozo!

Oshie and J-Dub and maybe MoJo I'd keep - the rest of you can go faaaaack-ya'selves. Terrible! Sad! Lazy! Uninspired! Pathetic! Booooooooooooooooooooo!

Oh and Holtby go back to Cah-nah-dah ya fuck! You couldn't save a shot from a blind guy in the playoffs ya fucking N-TAC ("N-TAC" (pronounced EN-TACK), stands for "no talent ass clown", for those who didn't know. You should know that though.)

God am I done with this team. But I'll be out at the local Caps bar on Friday, once again, hoping they'll finally get it...
Click to expand...

This is the salt we need. CapitalsGAF step up your game
 
Q

Quick

Banned
Calamari41 said:
Caps need more drunk guys in the stands yelling "SHOOT IT"
Click to expand...

SHOOT THE J!

SHOOT IT!

giphy.gif
 
M

MikeRahl

Member
A Serious Man said:
Straight into my veins.
Click to expand...

I'm sure writing that article was very cathartic, but he wants the Caps to take LESS shots and score MORE goals?

I'm sure there is some advanced stat out there that somehow tracks quality of shot based on distance and traffic around the goalie, but I'm going to guess 90% of their shots aren't coming from the blue line on an unobstructed goalie so taking less shots probably isn't a great idea.
 
Z

zroid

Banned
Fans never want to credit the opposing goalie when their team's shots aren't going in. Usually that's all it is. Fleury is playing out of his mind, which is obvious to any observer.
 
C

Calamari41

41 > 38
zroid said:
Fans never want to credit the opposing goalie when their team's shots aren't going in. Usually that's all it is. Fleury is playing out of his mind, which is obvious to any observer.
Click to expand...

Also consider the fact that the NHL is rigged. The overall rigging is specifically in favor of The Anaheim Ducks, but it's beyond question that a lot of the supplementary rigging is anti-Capitals.
 
P

PillarEN

Member
Calamari41 said:
Also consider the fact that the NHL is rigged. The overall rigging is specifically in favor of The Anaheim Ducks, but it's beyond question that a lot of the supplementary rigging is anti-Capitals.
Click to expand...

The NHL is out to get Trump's Caps
and his Rangers
? Sad
 
H

Holiday

Banned
Calamari41 said:
Also consider the fact that the NHL is rigged. The overall rigging is specifically in favor of The Anaheim Ducks, but it's beyond question that a lot of the supplementary rigging is anti-Capitals.
Click to expand...

d53925d8998dda466f1a9004d88dec79.jpg


Rigged...rigs...oil rigs...oil spills...wildlife trapped in oil...ducks trapped in oil...Dawn soap used to clean oil off of ducks...Dawn made by Proctor & Gamble...gambling...Las Vegas gambling capital of the world...NHL franchise in Las Vegas...Golden Knights...knights protect things...protect wildlife from oilspills...protect Ducks from Oilers...

It all makes sense! The pieces fit!
 
L

Line_HTX

Member
At this point WSH should just fire Trotz and trade some of those overpaid players away. So fucking stubborn that they don't change how they play, just skating in circles indefinitely and not shooting when there's actually an opening.
 
I

imBask

Banned
Line_HTX said:
At this point WSH should just fire Trotz and trade some of those overpaid players away. So fucking stubborn that they don't change how they play, just skating in circles indefinitely and not shooting when there's actually an opening.
Click to expand...

zroid warned us about volume shooting
he died for our sins
 
C

calder

Member
Trotz fired by Leonis after an especially devastating second round loss by the champs of losing in the second round.

A weary and reflective Trotz comes home to Winnipeg to coach the sad sack Jets, where at least he won't have to worry about outshooting an opponent 2-1 and somehow losing.

Everyone wins.
 
M

MetatronM

Unconfirmed Member
The Garden Faithful said:
In the past 10 years, the Rangers are 0-5 on May 4, been shutout 3 straight games, and it's the 10-year anniversary of Game 5 in Buffalo.
Click to expand...
May the 4th be with you, Sens.
 
P

Parch

Member
That was a frustrating game. Since illegal goals no longer apply to the Ducks, this series is going to be a challenge for the Oilers. Such a tease tying it late then losing it quick in overtime. Frustrating Oiler flashbacks piled on with frustrating officiating.

Went for an intermission leak and some goof in a Ducks jersey was pissing in the sink.
 
P

PillarEN

Member
I'm looking at Tootoo's stats. He got a lot of assists (for him) in 11-12. Tell me lifelong Perds fans, who was it that was providing goal scoring ability for him to pass to on that line?
 
S

ShaneB

Member
zroid said:
Fans never want to credit the opposing goalie when their team's shots aren't going in. Usually that's all it is. Fleury is playing out of his mind, which is obvious to any observer.
Click to expand...

I have and will again. What is there to get angry about? MAF is playing unreal.

Plus I played a pretty solid 9 holes yesterday..
 
JeffG

JeffG

Member
Parch said:
That was a frustrating game. Since illegal goals no longer apply to the Ducks, this series is going to be a challenge for the Oilers. Such a tease tying it late then losing it quick in overtime. Frustrating Oiler flashbacks piled on with frustrating officiating.
Click to expand...
Well...if Ebs didn't cough up the puck 3 times in one shift, Perry would never had the chance to bump into the goalie

and as far as the last goal. Gotta play to the whistle.

The fanboy in me wants to whine about the ref's and say boo hoo everyone is against us. The reality is that the both teams were some of the hottest at the end of the season and you are going to pay if you play shitty defence.

Parch said:
Went for an intermission leak and some goof in a Ducks jersey was pissing in the sink.
Click to expand...
If you gotta go...you gotta go

The line ups for the cans are crazy during the regular season....during playoffs with the beer intake higher, it would be nuts
 
C

Calamari41

41 > 38
If I had to sit and watch Vince Young win a national title off the back of a touchdown pass thrown on his knees beyond the line of scrimmage, you Oilers whiners can watch us win a second round game off the back of a goal scored slightly offside, or with arguable (technical) goalie interference.
 
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