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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

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120v

Member
so i did a little experiment with the "hiding" function on a few random users who regularly show up on my match results... it removes the users not only out of matches but your visitors page as well. thus it isn't possible to remove users from your search exclusively (?). The weird thing is that the girl is still among my "visitors"

I don't mean to come off as "reading too much into it", but i'm curious as to the site functions at play here. and btw this girl is still has the same match % and is in the same area
 
How do people feel about match.com?

I actually shelled out money for the service, thinking I was going for better matches, and things aren't working out.

Help me GAF?
 

Pastry

Banned
How do people feel about match.com?

I actually shelled out money for the service, thinking I was going for better matches, and things aren't working out.

Help me GAF?

I used it briefly, much different demographic. Professional women in their mid-twenties (25+) that were looking for more serious things. Some really attractive women on there. Honestly I've had more luck with OKCupid but I've also spent more time with it.
 

Manarola

Banned
How do people feel about match.com?

I actually shelled out money for the service, thinking I was going for better matches, and things aren't working out.

Help me GAF?
Was a lot harder for me to find dates on there, but the dates I did have were very good. There's also a lot less bums, waitresses, etc, more women with actual careers
 
Was a lot harder for me to find dates on there, but the dates I did have were very good. There's also a lot less bums, waitresses, etc, more women with actual careers

I used it briefly, much different demographic. Professional women in their mid-twenties (25+) that were looking for more serious things. Some really attractive women on there. Honestly I've had more luck with OKCupid but I've also spent more time with it.

Can you guys share some keys to success? I've sent out 18 messages in the past week, and I get some views, but no responses.
 
Can you guys share some keys to success? I've sent out 18 messages in the past week, and I get some views, but no responses.

Be yourself I did mines on Friday currently talking to two girls atm I sent some msgs to others if they respond cool and if they don't it's cool also lolz I be super polite saying "pardon my rudeness my name is yadda yadda and sorry for stating the obvious your name is Jen correct?" ( assuming it's on their profile ) and it works! The important thing is that you don't come off as a creep and desperate.
 

Pastry

Banned
Can you guys share some keys to success? I've sent out 18 messages in the past week, and I get some views, but no responses.

For the first message mention something in their profile. Doesn't necessarily have to be clever but just show you've read it. Avoid sending just "hey" and try to ask a question in your message so they have something to respond to. Make sure your photos are good also, ask a female friend to pick your best.
 

Sadetar

Member
I also humbly inform you that if someone needs my absolutely smashing (not really) advices to help to pick the best photos, I am available.
 

gosox333

Member
Just sent my first ever message. Once again, I did it drunkenly, I'm noticing a theme here.

Maybe I should just be drunk all times ever times.
 

Nelo Ice

Banned
Every single time I get a good conversation going I get pure randomly get silence or it goes silent if I ask for a number or give my own. Guess I should work on my profile pic for tinder since at least there, girls actually respond quite frequently if were matched. Probably have better luck there than then randomness I've seen on OKCupid.

Funny thing is I think I'd have better luck actually talking to the girl in person. Too bad getting there through text alone has been rather difficult so far.
 
#1: Be attractive
#2: Don't be un-attractive.

What does your profile look like?

Be yourself I did mines on Friday currently talking to two girls atm I sent some msgs to others if they respond cool and if they don't it's cool also lolz I be super polite saying "pardon my rudeness my name is yadda yadda and sorry for stating the obvious your name is Jen correct?" ( assuming it's on their profile ) and it works! The important thing is that you don't come off as a creep and desperate.

For the first message mention something in their profile. Doesn't necessarily have to be clever but just show you've read it. Avoid sending just "hey" and try to ask a question in your message so they have something to respond to. Make sure your photos are good also, ask a female friend to pick your best.

Also, be patient. And yes, having good pictures if very important

MATCH.jpg


Trying to get a link up just isn't working, but this is what the other women would see.

Tear away. I had it only for a week or so.
 

.GqueB.

Banned
MATCH.jpg


Trying to get a link up just isn't working, but this is what the other women would see.

Tear away. I had it only for a week or so.

Nice "about me" section. You should probably get a better picture though. It's not very flattering. You look like you have a wife beater on at first glance.
 
Nice "about me" section. You should probably get a better picture though. It's not very flattering. You look like you have a wife beater on at first glance.

I had a fellow GAF girl help me with the about me.

The photo I like the angle, but I'll retake with a collared shirt on.
 
How much do you pay for match anyways?

My subscription:

161.94 for 6 months with the 6 month guarantee.

so 27 bucks a month for a better dating pool.

Is it better than OKC? It hasn't shown to be yet.

match.com is smart about hiding their prices until you sign up and forget to cancel auto renew.
 

.GqueB.

Banned
My subscription:

161.94 for 6 months with the 6 month guarantee.

so 27 bucks a month for a better dating pool.

Is it better than OKC? It hasn't shown to be yet.

match.com is smart about hiding their prices until you sign up and forget to cancel auto renew.

Yikes. Curious to hear how it compares to OKC though.
 
Yikes. Curious to hear how it compares to OKC though.

I'd be more than happy to keep the community in the know.

From what I can see, its a better curated community of men and women professionals. Since you pay, youre all looking for the "real deal" but I've had friends who hooked up with less crazier and prettier women on Match, so you never know.
 

.GqueB.

Banned
I'd be more than happy to keep the community in the know.

From what I can see, its a better curated community of men and women professionals. Since you pay, youre all looking for the "real deal" but I've had friends who hooked up with less crazier and prettier women on Match, so you never know.

I actually tried it years ago right after college back when I was completely worthless. Half the questions made me feel like a dead beat. Now I'm too cheap to go back.
 
So I'm finding myself in need of Gaf advice. Sent about 40 messages back and forth with this chick on OKC and got her number. We texted back and forth that day, asked her if she's available to do something later this week and she said "I'll let you know". We haven't said much to each other after that. What now? Should I just continue conversating with her while avoiding the fact that I asked her out? I don't have anything invested in her so I'm not really tripping over the situation but I rather get a clear rejection.
 

freshair

Member
So I'm finding myself in need of Gaf advice. Sent about 40 messages back and forth with this chick on OKC and got her number. We texted back and forth that day, asked her if she's available to do something later this week and she said "I'll let you know". We haven't said much to each other after that. What now? Should I just continue conversating with her while avoiding the fact that I asked her out? I don't have anything invested in her so I'm not really tripping over the situation but I rather get a clear rejection.

Dammmn 40 messages is a lot before locking down a number.

I'm not a fan of "let's do something this week" as that's a bit vague. You should shoot out a location and time and have her respond to that.

But since what's done is done, her answer could be a genuine "I don't know my schedule yet" or the beginning of a slow fade out.

I guess I would continue the conversation and if she's receptive then do what you've been doing, but if she doesn't let you know if she's free in a day or 2, then lay it out. "Friday night, you and me, 8pm @ _____ location".
 

Sadetar

Member
I had a fellow GAF girl help me with the about me.

The photo I like the angle, but I'll retake with a collared shirt on.
What comes to the photo, honestly, take a new one.

I would recommend you to take it a bit more far away, so you would show more of your shoulders. Also I would suggest you to look at the camera.

Other than that very solid profile. Attaboy.
 

Manarola

Banned
So I'm finding myself in need of Gaf advice. Sent about 40 messages back and forth with this chick on OKC and got her number. We texted back and forth that day, asked her if she's available to do something later this week and she said "I'll let you know". We haven't said much to each other after that. What now? Should I just continue conversating with her while avoiding the fact that I asked her out? I don't have anything invested in her so I'm not really tripping over the situation but I rather get a clear rejection.
Here's one piece of advice. Don't send forty messages on OKC to one person.
 
I've been curious about Match for a while too, so it'll be nice to see how a Gaffer does with it.

Solid piece of advice.

Match is nicer looking to use than OKC, but expensive stuff (26.99 per month billed every 6 months)

Also, women are all professional, looking for a soulmate type of matches.
 

Maddocks

Member
So I'm finding myself in need of Gaf advice. Sent about 40 messages back and forth with this chick on OKC and got her number. We texted back and forth that day, asked her if she's available to do something later this week and she said "I'll let you know". We haven't said much to each other after that. What now? Should I just continue conversating with her while avoiding the fact that I asked her out? I don't have anything invested in her so I'm not really tripping over the situation but I rather get a clear rejection.

40 messages might sound like a lot, but it seems you had a conversation going, so I bet a good ammount was short answers and whatnot. While you taking to her with 40 messages, shes getting other messages from other guys. I bet you only focused on her because you felt like you had a good thing going. That was the mistake. Never focus on one person for a long period of time. After message 5 toss a feeler message out to move it off the site. You want her off the site asap because if she's on the site and showing up online, shes going to get messages from other people way more then if she was offline.

You asked her out, good shit, bad timing. She probably had someone else and they asked her first and she wants to try that person out while keeping you on the back burner incase the other guy doesn't work out. I have been there, so don't be that guy. You asked her out e rejected you, move on and forget it. She will return in about a week asking where you been. Don't fall victim.
 

Necrovex

Member
Match is nicer looking to use than OKC, but expensive stuff (26.99 per month billed every 6 months)

Also, women are all professional, looking for a soulmate type of matches.

Not surprising about the last paragraph. If they're paying for the site, they have a *strong* desire to find that guy.
 
40 messages might sound like a lot, but it seems you had a conversation going, so I bet a good ammount was short answers and whatnot. While you taking to her with 40 messages, shes getting other messages from other guys. I bet you only focused on her because you felt like you had a good thing going. That was the mistake. Never focus on one person for a long period of time. After message 5 toss a feeler message out to move it off the site. You want her off the site asap because if she's on the site and showing up online, shes going to get messages from other people way more then if she was offline.

You asked her out, good shit, bad timing. She probably had someone else and they asked her first and she wants to try that person out while keeping you on the back burner incase the other guy doesn't work out. I have been there, so don't be that guy. You asked her out e rejected you, move on and forget it. She will return in about a week asking where you been. Don't fall victim.

lol damn bro. Thanks for the feedback, even though most of your assumptions were wrong. But believe me, I'm NOT putting all my eggs in one basket so to speak. I'll be good.

Sidenote: It was 48 messages back and forth, some very long, some short. I personally don't like to ask for a number so early on, I think they'll feel uncomfortable about it, I would. Matter of fact, she gave me her number, I never asked.
 
lol damn bro. Thanks for the feedback, even though most of your assumptions were wrong. But believe me, I'm NOT putting all my eggs in one basket so to speak. I'll be good.

Sidenote: It was 48 messages back and forth, some very long, some short. I personally don't like to ask for a number so early on, I think they'll feel uncomfortable about it, I would. Matter of fact, she gave me her number, I never asked.

Yeah, just talk to random girls and don't stress it. You asked her out once now it's her turn to come to you, to see if she has any type of interest in you.
 
Sounds so damn intense. I imagine my "type" wouldn't be on there.

Not surprising about the last paragraph. If they're paying for the site, they have a *strong* desire to find that guy.

I think you get out what you put in. There's a hookup vibe on here as well. The paywall screens out people who don't wanna pay for a full membership.

Which raises the question, am I not getting responses because some women haven't paid for a full membership?
 

TxdoHawk

Member
If he didn't, he will, okcupid is the spot. Every time I have met a girl from okc, getting laid happened within the first 4 meetings.

I don't question it. When I was still active on the site, I had several women step in hard with the sexual advances, and I'm not even that attractive. I can only imagine what good-looking men get offered.

Too many crazy women looking for casual sex without a condom though.
 

Maddocks

Member
lol damn bro. Thanks for the feedback, even though most of your assumptions were wrong. But believe me, I'm NOT putting all my eggs in one basket so to speak. I'll be good.

Sidenote: It was 48 messages back and forth, some very long, some short. I personally don't like to ask for a number so early on, I think they'll feel uncomfortable about it, I would. Matter of fact, she gave me her number, I never asked.

I base all my replies on personal experience. So when I make assumptions, its mostly just showing everyone my failures. I have been there before, maybe not 40 messages, but there was a time when I would only message 1 girl and put the cart before the horse. All I can do is post my failures in hopes no one is as silly and blind as I used to be. Which was pretty bad.

I don't question it. When I was still active on the site, I had several women step in hard with the sexual advances, and I'm not even that attractive. I can only imagine what good-looking men get offered.

Too many crazy women looking for casual sex without a condom though.

Facts. I met a girl and within 30 minutes she was,"i think I want you to kiss me" it was out of left field too, not even talking about sex or kissing or anything, just talking about movies and bam that happened. I can say this one wanted a condom and wasn't till later in our relationship when she wanted to go raw dog.
 
I don't question it. When I was still active on the site, I had several women step in hard with the sexual advances, and I'm not even that attractive. I can only imagine what good-looking men get offered.

Too many crazy women looking for casual sex without a condom though.

I base all my replies on personal experience. So when I make assumptions, its mostly just showing everyone my failures. I have been there before, maybe not 40 messages, but there was a time when I would only message 1 girl and put the cart before the horse. All I can do is post my failures in hopes no one is as silly and blind as I used to be. Which was pretty bad.

Facts. I met a girl and within 30 minutes she was,"i think I want you to kiss me" it was out of left field too, not even talking about sex or kissing or anything, just talking about movies and bam that happened. I can say this one wanted a condom and wasn't till later in our relationship when she wanted to go raw dog.

Jesus guys. Wtf, I'm not getting anything remotely like what you both experienced when I was on OKC. That's why I shelled out the bucks for Match, thinking it's going to get better...

I must be dull/boring I guess. I struggle with the talking about myself part.
 

y2dvd

Member
I actually had someone ask me out to dinner yesterday lol. Her profile said something about finding Scarlet Johansson sexy. I sent her a msg saying "Who doesn't find Scarlet sexy?!" A few messages later and she ask if we want to go to dinner.

So I signed up for Tinder recently and swiped right like crazy. Well I ended up getting a match with this one girl and asked her what an object was in her pic. Ends up I had already talked to this girl on OKC, but I was ignoring her on there after awhile. She called me out lol. Oops! I guess it shouldn't be a surprised that people would be signed up for both apps.
 
Just curious, for those of you who have had success with okc, what kind of response rate do you get on messages you send out?

4 out of 9 so far for me.. Could change to 5-9 since this chick liked me and I haven't responded to her yet ( gotta make her wait ) lol. I just get annoyed when a chick is constantly checking your profile you send her a msg and it's radio silence like wdf
 
I actually had someone ask me out to dinner yesterday lol. Her profile said something about finding Scarlet Johansson sexy. I sent her a msg saying "Who doesn't find Scarlet sexy?!" A few messages later and she ask if we want to go to dinner.

So I signed up for Tinder recently and swiped right like crazy. Well I ended up getting a match with this one girl and asked her what an object was in her pic. Ends up I had already talked to this girl on OKC, but I was ignoring her on there after awhile. She called me out lol. Oops! I guess it shouldn't be a surprised that people would be signed up for both apps.

Sometimes when you get invited on the spot you be thinking yourself 1) I'm good looking 2) the thrist is real and 3) completely psycho.. Lol
 

MogCakes

Member
Jesus guys. Wtf, I'm not getting anything remotely like what you both experienced when I was on OKC. That's why I shelled out the bucks for Match, thinking it's going to get better...

I must be dull/boring I guess. I struggle with the talking about myself part.

Every woman's different. A lot of it is luck.
 

Necrovex

Member
I think you get out what you put in. There's a hookup vibe on here as well. The paywall screens out people who don't wanna pay for a full membership.

Which raises the question, am I not getting responses because some women haven't paid for a full membership?

Yeah. Match won't filter who is paying for a membership. You probably have sent a few messages to non-paying people.

Every woman's different. A lot of it is luck.

Exactly this. These are exceptions more than the rule. I had some intense girls wanting to meet up and bang (I wasn't interested in them). It's a dice roll. It's certainly in the minority though.

I have a friend who bangs a lot of OKC women on the first date, but they are 9/10 times overweight, unattractive or a combo deal. Only one woman was attractive, but she had a child too.
 
Yeah. Match won't filter who is paying for a membership. You probably have sent a few messages to non-paying people.

Exactly this. These are exceptions more than the rule. I had some intense girls wanting to meet up and bang (I wasn't interested in them). It's a dice roll. It's certainly in the minority though.

I have a friend who bangs a lot of OKC women on the first date, but they are 9/10 times overweight, unattractive or a combo deal. Only one woman was attractive, but she had a child too.

That would explain why I'm getting looks but no responses...
 
Yeah. Match won't filter who is paying for a membership. You probably have sent a few messages to non-paying people.



Exactly this. These are exceptions more than the rule. I had some intense girls wanting to meet up and bang (I wasn't interested in them). It's a dice roll. It's certainly in the minority though.

I have a friend who bangs a lot of OKC women on the first date, but they are 9/10 times overweight, unattractive or a combo deal. Only one woman was attractive, but she had a child too.

some big chicks are hot tho
 

Maddocks

Member
Jesus guys. Wtf, I'm not getting anything remotely like what you both experienced when I was on OKC. That's why I shelled out the bucks for Match, thinking it's going to get better...

I must be dull/boring I guess. I struggle with the talking about myself part.

My profile is legit the most boring. So boring I'll never post it because the people would say change everything because nothing is exciting about that profile. I suck at online talking, I'm way better in person, never a dull moment in the conversation department. I'm just better at reading body language then I am at internet messages. Its great when I can actually get women to meet in person, but it has to get to that stage. We all have our struggles.
 

Nelo Ice

Banned
I don't understand girls in my area. On top of silence I get disabled accounts during good convos. And I'm sure the 1 response answers to the funny pickup line I send makes me sound stupid or something but its like ok you don't want a boring hello so wtf are you girls expecting!?. I feel like everyone is expecting the most amazing convo and lines ever. Otherwise they either have a short attention span or I'm dealing with an absurd amount or better competition. I'm honestly dumbfounded atm.

I must have the shittest luck since I swear this would be easier if I got the chance to meet 1 girl in person.
Edit: and literally after I type this out I get a first msg from someone and a have multiple convos da fuq!?.
 
Figured I'd chime in a bit.

Been 6 months since my ex of 5 years broke up with me so I'm trying out the online dating thing a bit.

Had my first date last Friday and it went surprisingly well. 2.5 hours. Went for coffee and walked around town for a bit. Made out before she left. We have another date tonight. Still too early to say where things will go, but it's nice to get back out there.

Sent two messages last night, went 2/2 with replies. Trying to be as witty/funny as possible. I've had more success that way. I usually don't get a response if I just pick something out of their profile and say, "Oh hey I like that too."

I've also found that it's a numbers game. I'll send out messages to girls that I feel are guaranteed to reply, and get no response. Then I'll send out messages that seem like a long shot, and get a reply. Keep sending those messages and don't get discouraged.
 
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