Royal Rumble |OT| Garbage

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It's a goddamn travesty I'm not in the banner of this thread.

I should be the name and face of Wrassle-Gaf. I'm the biggest star in this community!
 
Just a few more days to the NeoGAF Avatar Rumble event, live on Twitch, 7pm Central. This Saturday!

I mean HOLY FUCK, MY FRIENDS it's going to be insane. I have the list right here, but I'm not giving away any surprises. Will The Mountie be there? Daniel Bryan? The Nasty Boys? Hulk Hogan? Jake the Snake? Yokozuna? Kane? Lou Thesz?

ONLY TIME WILL TELL!
 
I turned on RAW (or Smackdown?) for the first time in weeks and noticed the following:

-Kane is now civilized, speaks and wears business suits. Awesome
-Goldust and Cody teamed up. Awesome
-Batista is skinny. Leviathan no more. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
 
I was wondering last night when the last Royal Rumble PPV lived up to expectations as it's been in a downward swing as of late.

2011 wasn't terrible. The undercard matches (Edge vs. Ziggler / Miz vs. Orton) were both competent. The Rumble match was somewhat of a novelty with 40 opponents (this was the one other instance where CM Punk started at #1 - against Daniel Bryan no less) but there were some concerted rough patches like an extended sequence where John Cena and Hornswoggle cleaned house. The finishing sequence with Santino Marella was entertaining enough but it would have been nice to see Del Rio eliminate more than two guys from spot #38 to feel his win was especially deserved.

2008 at MSG stands out due to the legit surprise of Cena coming out last and winning the match without being hyped or spoiled in advance. In addition to the raucous MSG atmosphere the undercard matches (Edge vs. Rey / Orton vs. Jeff Hardy) delivered. Also, Jim Ross was still on commentary. Loved how the start of that match featured The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels after they closed the Rumble the previous year. Incidentally, that 2007 Rumble match is probably the last one I fondly remember without reservation.
 
Just a few more days to the NeoGAF Avatar Rumble event, live on Twitch, 7pm Central. This Saturday!

I mean HOLY FUCK, MY FRIENDS it's going to be insane. I have the list right here, but I'm not giving away any surprises. Will The Mountie be there? Daniel Bryan? The Nasty Boys? Hulk Hogan? Jake the Snake? Yokozuna? Kane? Lou Thesz?

ONLY TIME WILL TELL!

I know who wins...I've read the spoilers from the future.

You won't like it.
 
What are everyone's favorite Rumbles?

Thinking of putting together a list for my site.

And off the top of my head, 92, 97, 2001, 2004 and 2007 stand-out as the best to me. But sure others have different opinions.
 
What are everyone's favorite Rumbles?

Thinking of putting together a list for my site.

And off the top of my head, 92, 97, 2001, 2004 and 2007 stand-out as the best to me. But sure others have different opinions.

The one that Vince McMahon wins. Was that 2001? or 2000?
 
Perry Saturn to win the Rumble this Sunday.

Man I WISH. I loved Perry Saturn. His WCW theme was a Jimmy Hart Special of Judas Priest's "You've Got Another Thing Comin" and I'd get hype as fuck for Saturn.
 
Oh my, another year another Rumble. By far the best WWE Pay-Per-View of the year, the Rumble this year seems pretty predictable to a lot of you and that means either one of two things. It’s either going to be really fucking predictable and boring or they SWERVE and we get a PPV that everyone either FUCKING LOVES TO DEATH or FUCKING HATES WITH EVERY FIBER OF THEIR BEING! Regardless, it’s a PPV and that means it is PREDICTION TIME FOR THE ROYA RUMBO TWENTYFOURTEEN! YAY!

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WWE Tag Team Championship: Cody Rhodes & Goldust (C) vs. The New Age Outlaws (Kickoff Match)
Can we talk about how old Mr. Ass looks with his hair down? He should keep it tied behind his head or they should replace him with Ziggler, because GAWD MAN YOU LOOK ANCIENT like this. Regardless, the New Age Outlaws have a chance of becoming the tag-team champions again, which is weird enough as it is, I can see why they’re around though with the network coming up and focusing so heavily on the Attitude Era. In that light I can also see them taking the belts from Cody and Goldust. But they really shouldn’t. Of course they don’t need the belts and more over Goldust and Cody are nowhere near done yet, let them hold on to the titles for a bit longer, just so I can watch some more Goldust, who is evidently in his wrestling prime, even though he’s been around as long as the NAO themselves. Besides, the ‘E finally has a proper tag-team division, why ruin it by putting the belt on part-time old guys? Rhodes Brothers retain.

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Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt
It’s weird they’re having this match after that moment on Raw last week. That moment with Bryan on the cage leading the loudest YES-chants in a long time (and that’s saying something for sure) seemed as much of a blow-off to a feud as any. But here we are, for the Bryan vs. Bray match and I’m not even sure it’s the blow-off to the feud or if it will continue for Elimination Chamber. If the feud is continuing, Bray wins this one and Bryan gets beat up, if it’s not, Bryan wins this match. I’m gonna assume Bryan is in the EC match next month and this is the end of this feud, Bryan wins.

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Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar
As fucking awful as Big Show is, I do enjoy a good Brock Lesnar pounding and who better to pound on then a big fat crybaby like Show? I hope they go ten minutes and Lesnar is every bit as brutal as he’s been in recent times. Besides, there’s no way this match can be worse than any of the HHH vs. Lesnar bouts right? Lesnar beats Show bloody to a DQ

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WWE World Heavyweight Championship: Randy Orton (c) vs. John Cena
If you went out and polled outside the arena of a WWE event on the match people would least likely want to watch there would be three top contenders. One would be Kane vs The Big Show, number two would be The Miz vs anyone else on the roster and number three would be Randy Orton vs. John Cena. The boringest of boring matches between two people who already had way too many boring matches between eachother. These two guys suck together and they have always sucked together. Stip matches are literally the only thing the WWE can do to make bouts between the two seem at least somewhat interesting so they’ve provided this time by announcing this as a match that HAS NO STIPS, NO INTERFERENCE, NO COUNT-OUTS AND NO-DQ WINS. Pinfall or submission wins only. (please don’t point out that NO-DQ and NO-INTERFERENCE are mutually exclusive, logic has never been the WWE’s strongest point). Anyway, the result doesn’t really matter, it depends on who wins the Rumble, if Batista wins, Orton retains, which seems most likely. Expect this match to go on last.

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The 30-Superstar Royal Rumble Match
God I love this match to death, if there is a heaven, it’s Royal Rumble time every month.

Person that lasts the longest in the match
This really depends on if and when Bryan comes out, if Bryan comes out at #2 at the start of the Rumble, he’ll go on to win the whole thing (more on that later), so he would be the longest. If not, I expect CM Punk who comes in at number one to last until the final four and as such lasting the longest of all of them.

Person that eliminates the most people
This has to be Roman Reigns. They’re pushing hard for this guy to be the breakout star of the The Shield (though I doubt the other two won’t break out on their own), so it is assumed they are gonna have him match or break the 11-elimination record held by Kane. I can see that happening, especially now that Kane is semi-retired from in-ring action. And why not, Roman Reigns has a lot of potential to be huge, especially in the mainstream media, so lets have it, Roman Reigns gets 12-eliminations. I hope one of them is Santino when Reigns does his Superman-punch and knocks him over the top rope that way.

Surprise Entries in this years Rumble
1. Daniel Bryan - They haven’t announced Bryan for the match, because they wanted to swerve us I think. They want that big pop when he enters the Rumble, I expect him to come in early in the Rumble, when the ring is either empty beside of Punk (maybe #2).
2. Jake The Snake Roberts - Come on, that will be great PR if anything else, the door is open after Old School Raw so it would be insane not to do it.
3. Sheamus – He was rumored to be cleared by Rumble time and then changed his tune claiming his recovery would probably not be until after the Rumble. So he’s in there for sure.
4. Sting – His TNA contract is up, he’s coming to WWE and I swear to everything that is holy if this doesn’t happen I will cry real (but very manly) tears. Give me Crow Sting with lyrical theme. GIVE IT TO ME NOW!
Totally not happening: Hulk Hogan – He’s going to be in WWE soon, but he won’t be wrestling ever. Guy can barely remain upright and he’s apparently not getting cleared to wrestle in WWE. I don’t see him doing it even in a protected appearance like a Rumble match. Still, Real American hitting and Hogan strutting down the ring would be fun for one night.

Most likely winning the Rumble (in order of most likely to least likely)
1. Batista – It wouldn’t make too much sense to have a guy like Batista come in for a meaningless run and WWE has shown they’re not above putting the belt on part-timers like The Rock did last year. However, Batista is no Rock by any stretch of the imagination, although that Marvel movie helps a bit, it is a gimmick Marvel movie with B-rate superheroes and might just not be as big as it could be. Anyways, if WWE wants to go the predictable Batista vs. Orton title bout at Mania route, he will win.
2. Daniel Bryan – Could it be that they really did plan a long-term thing for Daniel Bryan after SummerSlam and set him up for that big title match win at Mania 30 that mimics the title win of He Who Shall Not Be Named at Mania 20? It does seem unlikely and as of right now Bryan isn’t even in the Rumble. It remains to be seen, but if they do want to do the swerve ending followed by the biggest pop at the end of a Rumble in many years they will have to give it to Bryan.
3. CM Punk – One of the final things on CM Punk’s bucket list is a WrestleMania Main Event match, his contract runs out in July and while I think he’s re-signing I wouldn’t be at all surprised if one of his crazy demands in 2011 would be a WM Main Event match in his contract. So if he did have that, winning the Rumble would be a good first step. However, Vinny Mac agreeing to those terms seems rather unlikely (but Punk was extremely hot at the time so who knows) and the storyline is leaning to Trips vs. Punk instead. I don’t see Trips winning the title from Orton (at least, not this late in the game), so Punk will probably get eliminated via some kind of Authority shenanigans.
4. Roman Reings – As said above, the final person that has a shot at winning the Rumble would be Reigns, but I believe it’s very unlikely. He’s in line for that main event push, but there’s no way he’s getting a Main Event push at Mania this early in his career, it’s not exactly a name that’s going to sell WrestleMania (on the WWE Network) to anyone, so I’d say this is a 1% or less type of choice.

Above four would also be my pick for the final four in the match. Reigns will eliminate Punk, Batista eliminates Punk and the final two will be Batista vs. Bryan. I think it’s about a 75% chance Batista eliminates Bryan instead of the other way around. I would love to see Bryan vs. Cena for the belt at Mania though. Given how Bryan has already beat Cena clean before, it gives a nice doubt on wether he can do it again or not (Cena was somewhat injured bla bla) and that’s a good story to tell. Bryan vs. Orton is boring as fuck and doesn’t draw. So if the idea is Orton holding on to the belt (Which it probably is), Batista will win. However, Orton doesn’t seem to draw at all, his program with Bryan bombed (due to poor booking), but they diverted that blame to Bryan (it seems). His program with Big Show bombed just as hard (and Big Show took the blame for that) and now he’s in a boring program with Cena that nobody is interested for either, so that’s bombing (and you know this time they’re not going to blame it on Cena). Maybe their eyes are opened that headlining Mania with an Orton match is not the smartest idea in the world… Who knows, fingers crossed for Bryan.
 
I'm sticking with this theory:

Surprise #30 entrant is a guy in a suit with a Vince McMahon mask, he wins and pulls the mask off to reveal Shane. But Vince says since they announced the winner as Vince McMahon, he is the winner. But he doesn't want the title shot, he owns the damn company. He wants to humble his punkass son for fucking off to china or whatever. Vince/Shane at WM30, loser leaves the family match.
 
Could honestly see last #28 and #29 guys eliminate themselves and #30 in HHH walks out to ring declared the winner and then walks back up the ramp.
 
I'll be pretty disappointed if WWE puts the Orton/ Cena match on last. The crowd doesn't care and it would be pretty funny if a shitload of people just walked out after the Rumble Match.
 
Aiii you should do PPV Previews at Legitshook.com!

Avatar Rumble is TOMORROW. So many goddamned surprises. Join us at 7pm Central on Twitch! We will be using this thread for discussion if we feel the need!
 
I didn't think of that, do I still have a login for legitshook?

-Edit, checking my mail I don't think I do, sign me up Sunny
 
Musician Sting showing up at the Royal Rumble to play Roxanne would be HHH's greatest trolling moment ever

Musician Sting shows up at the Rumble and during the middle of his song, he's smashed over the head by a guitar.....

BAH GAWD KING THAT'S JEFF JARRETT!!!!
 
My Royal Rumble match predictions.

Winner - Batista or Bryan. I think it depends on the winner of the Cena/Orton match. If Cena wins I can see them wanting to do Cena/Bryan II (although Cena losing clean twice in a row to Bryan sounds unlikely). If Orton retains then Batista is a good lock. Unless Bryan still wins but at EC in the WWEWHC match Batista costs Orton the title somehow. Besides, they may want the image of Bryan "YES"ing under the WM30 sign to close the show.

Competitor in the match the longest - CM Punk. He'll get to the final four and rather be eliminated clean by Reigns or Batista or HHH/Kane come down and cost him the match.

Competitor in the match the shortest - Santino, Sandow, Ziggler or Khali I'd imagine. Regardless of who it'll be I'd expect Reigns to eliminate them during his killing spree.

Most eliminations - Reigns. He's getting the big push from the Shield. I'm expecting at least 8, maybe even double digits. He'll get eliminated by Batista probably, or maybe even Ambrose will do it because it's "every man for himself". Possibly even like Batista and Flair in 2005 with Ambrose failing to eliminate Reigns.

Surprise entrants - Jake the Snake and Bryan are likely I think. Although I believe Bryan was on a graphic for the RR match itself. Also the obligatory Hacksaw Jim Duggan appearance.

As for the other matches:

Rhodes vs NAO - NAO could win this. This match could also be the catalyst for a potential Cody vs Goldust match at Mania.

Brock vs Show - I think Brock's got this. It'll likely be a quick match and will feature a Brock scream and/or a first-time-ever* F5 on Show.

*In the mind of the commentators

Bryan vs Bray - Bryan will win. But Bray and the others will attack him afterwards. This could lead to a surprise entrance in the Rumble or he won't appear at all.

Cena vs Orton XXVII - I've lost count as to how many times this match has happened. I can't see Cena not being in the main event of WM30. Then again, they could do Cena vs Taker. But if Cena vs Bray is happening, then Orton's got this unless they pointlessly give Cena a month reign just to boost his amount of WWE title reigns.
 
Rhodes Brothers can't possibly be this hot and then drop belts on a preshow to the New Age Outlaws. We're not talking Wade Barrett vs Miz here. Cody & Goldust retain

Brock probably destroys Big Show and get's a DQ, since this is not a no DQ match. F5 on something outside of the ring to get the match stopped. Bork needs to look like a monster going into WM for whoever he will lose to.

Daniel Bryan wins and hopefully ends this crap feud.

Cena vs Orton. If Cena wins he is holding it till Mania to probably set up Cena/ Bork. More likely Orton wins, but loses at EC to Bork and sets up Batista/ Bork for Mania. Cena ends up against Taker and we all cry tears of salt.

Rumble match:

Not so surprise entrants; Sheamus, RVD

Surprise entrant; Ultimate Warrior

Winner: Batista
 
I'll be pretty disappointed if WWE puts the Orton/ Cena match on last. The crowd doesn't care and it would be pretty funny if a shitload of people just walked out after the Rumble Match.

The only time I can recall the Rumble not being the main event was in 2006(I think), where they had a Kurt Angle WHC defense in the main event because it ended with Undertaker collapsing the ring with his MAGIC.

Surprise entrants:
Sheamus (duh)
Jake Roberts (can actually DDT someone and get eliminated by Ambrose to finish that story)
Daniel Bryan
Chris Jericho (sets up his Wrestlemania feud)
Christian
 
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