Stripper posts insane story on Twitter with more twists than a Shonda Rhimes script

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Angelus Errare said:
For those who are insistent that they can't understand the story and the words don't make sense of them.

I wrote it in a way that you can instantly understand. So you too can laugh and stop embarrassing yourself in this thread.
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Japanmanx3 said:
Angelus the new JDSN!
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where you been b, angelus been on point for a long ass time.
 
Fiction said:
I grew up in New Mexico so along with 'y'all' I say 'like' waaaay too much and drop random New Mexico Spanish slang that people actually from Mexico can't understand. It's awesome :/
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Yeah, my sisters do the like thing often and the Spanish slang which I don't use myself but understand since my whole family does it. We're a mostly Mexican in bloodline origin with a bit of Native and Indian mixed in due to my Mom's side.
 
Secret Fawful said:
Uh huh. That backpedal. Nobody wants to be a Gaogaogao.
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What can I say. I regret not reading the rest of the thread before posting. I admit my resilience towards reading it is based at least partly in not good things (racism, classism, etc), and I don't fault some of those calling out people. (As defensive as I feel myself getting.)
 
HILARIOUS.

The twists and turns were great, and it was intriguing throughout.

Lines are quotable and is formatted surprisingly good.

Tried showing this to somebody that normally would like these kinds of stories and she just couldn't get it though.
 
my man angel-chan puttin in that work

ReAxion said:
The reason you associate it with Florida is because media has complete access to police records there and they pick the weird stories on purpose because they drive clicks/ratings. All of this could be going on in your neighborhood and you'd never know unless you were involved. It needs a gator to be Florida exclusive.
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really puttin the pointlessness of G/A/F? threads on blast here, but it's known
 
Forbidden Love Pt 2.
Mangaka: Zola R. Moon
Translator: K4w411_kurojin

After Z-san has finished, he tells Jess-chan to go get cleaned up. Z-chan and his waifu leave and the room is quiet for the next 30 minutes. Z-san messages Zola-chan and tells her that he's trusting her with Jess-chan. So they go to 4 oppas and let Jess-chan work. They're about to go back to the hotel and Zola-chan gets a message saying they're willing to pay 5,500,000Yen for 2 girls, Zola-chan tells the oppa there is only one girl, so they drop the price to 2,000,000 Yen and note that they have 4 bishounen. He gives Zola-chan the address and they go there.

They get to the room number and Jess-chan knocks on the door, they ask who it is and Jess chan says "In call". They open the door super fast and grab Jess-chan! Zola-chan takes off running! She ran so fast she couldn't see straight but kept on running. She runs out and the car is gone! So Zola-chan starts screaming Jarret! Jarret!

Zola-chan continues to run as she calls Jarret-chan, he asks are the girls done and she goes "BAKA! Z-SAN TOLD YOU TO NEVER LEAVE US!!!" Zola-chan is STILL running and tells Jarret-chan to come get her because they took Jess-chan! She calls Z-san and he's totemo super upset! >_<

Z-san pulls up and they all go upstairs, Zola-chan didn't want to, but Z-san was really upset and yelled at her so she and Jarret-chan went with Z-san. Z-san knocks on the door and demands for Jess-chan back. They hear Jess-chan scream then the door opens....it's Florida-san from earlier!!!!!!1

He lets Z-san inside and Z-san sits on the bed with his strap (translator's note: gun) out asking where is Jess-chan. Z-san kicks down the closet door and finds Jess-chan unconscious. Florida-san says he'll pay Z-san 20,000,000 yen for Jess-chan! @_@.

Z-san refuses and Florida-san threatens Z-san saying he can't just walk out the place. Zola-chan can barely see anything but all of a sudden hears a gun go off (translator's note: the gun fired). Everyone runs! Z-san is carrying Jess-chan and they hop in the car.
Zola-chan starts crying asking what happened. Z-san says Florida-man reached for his piece (translator's note: gun) so he shot him in the face! O_O.

They go to Z-san's apatto and Jess-chan wakes up and Zola-chan explains what happens. At this point Zola-chan wants to go home. Z-san goes to get rid of the gun. Z-san wants Jess-chan to trap still and Jarret-san starts punching himself again and starts crying.

Zola-chan is at the door ready to go, then suddenly Jarret-san stops crying. Jarret-chan runs towards the balcony and jumps! Thankfully he doesn't fall because his pants are stuck! Zola-chan calls Z-chan crying about Jarret, Z-san slaps Jarret-chan then puts him in the car. Jess-chan starts to cry and confide in Zola-chan saying she never intended for Zola-chan to trap that's why she didn't, and hope they can be tomodachis =_=.

They get back to Detroit and Zola-chan's waifu picks her up and takes her home.

4 days later Zola-chan gets a collect call from Jess-chan. She got arrested for trapping in Las Vegas. Z-san was wanted for kidnapping 15 underage girls (Baka American police, they're 1,000 year old demons!) and murder. Zola-chan tells her she has the wrong number, and Jess-chan yells "Tell Jarret-oppa to bail me out!".

Z-san got a life sentence in prison, and Jess-chan is back in Detroit with her Okaa-san and baby.

&#32066;&#12431;&#12426;&#12290;
 
As a mexican nerd who is not down with how modern americans speak, im calling bullshit on anybody who says they didn't understand, i mean come on, contextual clues are all over the place and she even explains the trickier terms, it's perfectly understandable.
 
Angelus Errare said:
Forbidden Love Pt 2.
Mangaka: Zola R. Moon
Translator: K4w411_kurojin


&#32066;&#12431;&#12426;&#12290;
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God's work.

Also, just to the commentary about this being florida... It actually makes a hell of a lot of sense that this would be tampa, given the guy was in the human trafficking trade.
 
Angelus Errare said:
For those who are insistent that they can't understand the story and the words don't make sense of them.

I wrote it in a way that you can instantly understand. So you too can laugh and stop embarrassing yourself in this thread.

Forbidden Love pt 1.
Mangaka - Zola R. Moon
Translations by k4w411_Kurojin

So Zola-chan met this baka-gaijin Jess at Hooters, Zola-chan was Jess-chan's cafe maid she was so kawaii, totemo kawaii. Jess-chan came in their with her onii-chan black man. Zola-chan being a cafe maid sat down with Jess-chan and her onii-chan and they started talking. Apparently Jess-chan's onii-chan gives her kane (translator's note: money). They were bonding and becoming tomodachis (friends). They exchange numbers feeling like their meeting was destiny and continue talking for quite some time.

The next day, Jess-chan sends Zola-chan a message saying "Onee-san! Let's got to Florida!! :3", She tells Zola-chan she wants to dance in Florida, and Zola-chan is like "hai!!" Zola-chan's waifu didn't want her to go, so she had the sex with him (translator's note: sex) then left with Jess-chan to Florida.

Zola-chan gets in the car and meets another one of Jess-chan's onii-chans, they are blackman2-chan, and Jarret-chan. Jarret-chan and Jess-chan are in love love (translator's note: in love) and blackman2-chan just lives with them. They get to the motel and Jess-chan tells Zola-chan that this room is for Jarret-chan and then they head off for the club (translator's note: A place were people dance and watch others dance, totemo ecchi).

Zola-chan dances at the club and makes 930,000 Yen. Jess-chan tells Zola-chan that blackman2-chan was her pimp, unfortunately Jarrett-chan didn't know this (strike 1). Blackman2-chan comes up and he's like "how much did you girls make me? :3" and they tell him nothing (usotsuki!). He is pretty sad because his real waifu also had a bad night. Because they had a bad night he asks if they want to trap (translator's note: He means do they want sex older gentlemen for kane like schoolgirls!). Jess-chan is like "hai!!!"

They pull up to a different hotel and Jess-chan and Zola-chan start arguing. Zola-chan doesn't trap she is just a stripper so she yells at poor Jess-chan like a baka. Jess-chan starts crying saying she's scared and doesn't want Zola-chan to leave her all alone. Jess-chan tells Zola-chan that she can just check the guys, she doesn't have to trap (translator's note: have sex with men for money). Zola-chan decides to stay and protect Jess-chan!

First guy knocks at the door and he's an older uaito piggu and says he's here for Jess-chan, Jess-chan and uaito piggu have sex. Zola-chan is shocked! @_@ because Jess-chan says she that her price for sex is only 110,000 Yen! Zola-chan decided to help Jess-chan make more kane by putting her profile on an ecchi site setting the price at 650,000 Yen minimum!

Jess-chan is bukakke'ed by 20 guys and makes 5,550,000Yen (sugoi!). Jarrett-chan calls asking where Zola-chan and Jess-chan are, they usotsuki (translator's note: lie) and say they went to another maid cafe. He doesn't believe her and tells Zola-chan to not be a baka slut like Jess-chan.

A few hours later blackman2-chan comes and he asks how much Jess-chan made, she told him the truth (5,550,000 yen). He's shocked and goes "sugoi!!" dou yatte?!" and she's like Zola-chan helped me! :3. He takes the money from Jess-chan and gives Zola-chan 500,000 yen. He doesn't give Jess-chan any because she hasn't paid her rent in months T_T.

They all leave to go back to Jarrett's hotel and he's downstairs smoking weed with a random Florida-san. Blackman2-chan asks who that guy is and Jarret-chan is like "He just wanted to know who I was here with, it's okay" Florida-san says goodbye and leaves. They all go to the room and Blackman2-chan is really mad. He yells saying that Jarret-chan didn't know Florida-san that well and he shouldn't have told him that there were 2 bishoujous here. Jarret-chan explains why he said that and Blackman2-chan goes "we have to go now! They know there's money here!"

They go to a nicer love love hotel and he asks Zola-chan to keep an eye on Jarret-chan.
Jarret-chan and Jess-chan start arguing about Jess-chan trapping. He starts crying and he's like Zola-chan is this why you came to FL? Zola-chan goes "No, I didn't even know I was set up!" Jarret-chan is shocked and calls Jess-chan a hoe! (translator's note: baishunpu). Zola-chan leaves and goes for a swim in the love love hotel pool.

Blackman2-chan calls Zola-chan and tells her to setup the calls for Jess-chan again and Zola-chan says okay. She goes up to the room and tells Jess-chan to get ready, Jarret-chan gets really upset and starts punching himself! He tells Jess-chan if she does this again he will kill himself because he really loves her! Uguuu!

Jarret-chan yells that everyone knows Jess-chan is a baishunpu now and that he wants to go home. He throws his keitai at her (translator's note: phone). It has her facebook status showing both her love love ads! Jess-chan starts crying! T_T now everyone knows she's a baishunpu! Jess-chan calls blackman2-chan and 5 minutes later (instant transmission) he knocks on the door bringing his waifu with him.

Blackman2-chan is very upset, totemo upset and lifts Jarret-chan off the ground. Jarret-chan starts crying and apologizing going "sumimasen, gomennasai! blackman-chan!" Blackman2-chan's waifu pulls out a gun (Translator's note: a baka American weapon, not as elegant as a Japanese Katana (katana means sword)), she tells Z-san (blackman2-chan) to kill Jarret-chan, but Jess-chan says no.

Z-san doesn't kill him, but says he's going to kill his manhood and tells Jarret-chan to sit in front of him. He tells Jarret-chan to delete the post (and he does) then calls Jess-chan over. Z-san's waifu unbuckles his pants, then Jess-chan starts sucking his o-chinchin! Then he starts doing doggystyle on Jess-chan with Jarret-chan watching.
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bhuvAOu.gif


t-thank you senpai
 
Fiction said:
I'm white and Native, look Latina, and can't speak Spanish beyond the slang so it's a bit awkward lol.

I cannot for the life me of shake the stupid 'likes' from my casual dialogue. It's annoying as fuck.

Also, I use 'all' where it shouldn't be used, but it's less prominent than the likes. "That painting is like, all pretty." I once said and then hated myself.
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Well that's not new to me partially since all but one of my sisters don't know Spanish beyond slang. (Dad didn't teach us and denied knowing how to speak it despite us hearing him have multiple conversations with people completely in Spanish.)

Well likes isn't so bad I leave out some context based things in my speech due to anxiety and that's a bit more embarrassing to me.

Maybe you have a little valley girl slipping in there then. :P
 
Allow me to put on my "college educated in the English language" hat.

Gaogaogao said:
localize this story into english, I cant follow
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I cannot comprehend this post. There are what I believe to be words here, but they do not appear correct. The sentence does not begin with a capital letter. Nor does what, I assume, the writer means to be the word "English." There is no apostrophe in "can't". And where is the period?

Gaogaogao said:
you are too kind, thanks

does lowkey mean in her mind?
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The capitalization here, again, is atrocious. What language are you even writing in?

Gaogaogao said:
seriously story needs localization
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Where is your comma? Just try to say this sentence as written out loud. How does one even go about vocalizing a lack of ending punctuation?

Gaogaogao said:
thats not true AT ALL

yes, and other words could be chosen so that it is more widely understood.
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What, exactly, does "thats" mean?

This garbage is disgusting. I cannot bring myself to even attempt to finish scrolling through this uneducated trash.
 
it's that last line...

there are two things which ring it as being totally not true

the balcony jump

and

"If u stuck wit that whole story you are hilarious lol. :) :) :) :) :) :)"

it's a masterwork of fiction and a choice example of the unreliable narrator trope
 
Gaogaogao said:
aww :(
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I6YP0AE.png


Femmeworth said:
What can I say. I regret not reading the rest of the thread before posting. I admit my resilience towards reading it is based at least partly in not good things (racism, classism, etc), and I don't fault some of those calling out people. (As defensive as I feel myself getting.)
Click to expand...

At least you can admit it honestly, and stop yourself and say "Wait...maybe I should re-think this". That's a very good thing.
 
Angelus Errare said:
...

4 days later Zola-chan gets a collect call from Jess-chan. She got arrested for trapping in Las Vegas. Z-san was wanted for kidnapping 15 underage girls (Baka American police, they're 1,000 year old demons!) and murder. Zola-chan tells her she has the wrong number, and Jess-chan yells "Tell Jarret-oppa to bail me out!".

...
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Oooof.
 
Femmeworth said:
What can I say. I regret not reading the rest of the thread before posting. I admit my resilience towards reading it is based at least partly in not good things (racism, classism, etc), and I don't fault some of those calling out people. (As defensive as I feel myself getting.)
Click to expand...

Thread hero.

After Angelus
 
I read the first few lines, made some hot choocolate, got my cigs ready and put on some ice cube and then read the whole thing.

what a ridiculous story lmao

that is beyond fucked up. hollywood movie pls.
 
The tension in this thread has drawn out the edges of a conflict between parts of GAF I didn't even know existed.
 
breadtruck said:
I read the whole thing, and I still really aint sure who was who. Meh.
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Jarret: A Visionary robbed of his Future
Jess: A Sniper deprived of her Words
Z : A Ghost without a Past
Nigga wit dreads that Jarret was smoking wit at the run down Motel: A Rival living a Lie
Zola : A Fallen Legend
 
Fiction said:
Slightly off topic because I am old:

When did "y'all" become an urban word?

I say it all the time and have had people recently accuse me of 'pretending to be black' or some shit.

I'm like

Wait, I grew up in the rural southwest, y'all is like...a thing there.
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most urban American blacks have rural cultural roots a couple generations or more back.
 
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