I can't even imagine going through something like that with the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with and I'm sorry you have to, but remember you're not alone. You have other people who care about you, friends, family, even us. The people close to you are the ones who will help you through this, get some friends and go get drunk, cry your eyes out and spend time with the ones you love. I'm not nearly good enough at advice to actually help with this, but know that my best wishes are with you and that no matter what happens, everything will be fine in time. You just have to give it that time and grow from this pain. Sorry for the general response, I just can't even begin to properly form the words for to display my empathy for something this serious.
My friend showed up and clouded my sensors with the siren call of the anime.
D'awwwwwww
I don't sleep.