Just to be clear, we're not friends anymore, but that's for an entirely different reason. I told her we can't be friends for a while until I got some things straight. But we left on good terms and she made it clear that she'd always be there for me when I'm ready.
Be warned that if she is like that, that is what she is going to assume.
It all comes down to how much you want her in your life, if you don't want her in it anymore then stop being friends with her. As harsh as it sounds, you're not obligated to be someones crutch when you don't want to be.
She's not like that, she's self-destructive in a way that she blames herself for everything that happens to her, which led me to spending a lot of time and energy to convince her that not everything is her fault.
Oooof.
That's a tough one.
First off, if you leave her, does she have anyone else to support her.
This is why I'm slightly concerned. She has a boyfriend who has a history of neglecting her because video games, her best friend is extremely depressed, and another friend of her's she doesn't even like. She has her parents but she doesn't tell them anything, she lied that she was happy to her psychologist(her logic is that she doesn't want to concern anyone).
How strong is your relationship with her? Long-time friends or recently met? If you've known her for a long time and are good friends you should probably try and help, and if after a good try she's still not out of her spiral then you should probably pull back. If not, then you should leave her, lest she drag you down as well.
We were friends for "only" 6 months, but we were extremely close. As in we talked almost 24/7 and did almost everything together.
You can only look out for someone up to a point before it starts to bring you down. In my experience some people just don't want to be helped. Put yourself first. I have a friend who has been on the destructive path for years and no matter what me and my mates done he just wouldn't accept our help or friendship. Its got to the stage now were his company a misery void that we avoid at all costs. We tried so hard to help him but there is only so much we could do (years)
This is what I realized as well. I suffered from a severe depression in the past and desperately didn't want her to experience the same, but I realized that there was nothing I could do and I had to let her find out for herself why it's awful.
How self-destructive is she and how close are you with her?
You're the only person that would be able to know if she's too stubborn to seek help for self-destructive behavior. That all really depends on the quality of your friendship.
She harms herself sometimes, and I could predict when it would happen and could not do anything to stop her. I got very close to getting her off it completely but I knew it was only temporary. She could always do it and just not tell me.
If it's too demanding on you, then you're not a bad person to want to step away from it. If it's that bad, she needs to seek professional help.
If there's one thing I've learned in life so far it's not to be a person's only source of comfort. That's a grand road for becoming a burnt out husk of a person, because your life becomes centered around that individual and making sure they're happy.
This is what happened and part of the reason I couldn't be friends anymore. I wasn't myself anymore and my mind was warped, I couldn't think clearly and logically, my priorities were fucked up. I decided that I didn't deserve to spend every day sacrificing my time and energy just to get her 10% more happy.
I would trust her to seek professional help but she keeps insisting that everything is fine even though I can clearly see it's not. The worst part was that I was the only one who truly knew in what state she's in, she keeps everything a secret from the rest.
