I just wanted to report back in and say that I stuck with the game, and yes, it finally clicked. Oh lord, did it click. The game assumes you know a lot about MMOs before you go in, which was a huge hurdle, but after a lot of time on forums and wikis I finally figured it all out and found myself playing "correctly". Now, I'm one mission away from having done every single mission on Solomon Island and have started testing the waters in Egypt. I have a few dungeons under my belt, too. And it's glorious. I'm having a fantastic time.
Probably the last thing I learnt that made me feel like a dumbass in retrospect is the need/greed system. It never gets explained, and I assumed that, at first, it was some sort of prisoner's dilemma, but that didn't make any sense. Then I assumed that if you clicked 'need' you got the item, and maybe 'greed' made it so that if you won you got money instead of the item. So, I just spammed 'need' whenever it came up.
Luckily, I was almost always playing with my wife, who thought the same thing and was also clicking 'need' all the time, and I had the sense to look it up and found an explanation on some forum for a different MMO before my last dungeon run. So, no one ever wanted to lynch me. That I know of.