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Valve's fake, rigged, waste of time Progress Quest troll Portal 2 ARG

Cipherr

Member
BY2K said:
Got my Potato Hat and Portal 2 pin.

The pin is level 13. Clever.

EDIT: The Defense Grid Aperture Science Login Page has been found! Only 2 left! Amnesia and RUSH. IMO, Amnesia will cause the most trouble.

The hell, wait tell me what I need to do to get the portal pin please.
 

BY2K

Membero Americo
Cipherr said:
Where, are they on the steam store?

1... 2... 3... KICK IT!
AaAaAA!!!
Amnesia
Audiosurf
BIT.TRIP BEAT
Cogs
Defense Grid
Killing Floor
RUSH
Super Meat Boy
The Ball
The Wonderful End of the World
Toki Tori

They are all on Steam. 40$ for the pack. Individually, they are all 50% off.

EDIT: The Amnesia Omen puzzle was resolved!

The potion certainly is a capricious tool to work with, and one who consumes it will suffer from memory loss, but to what degree is difficult to predict. Lately, I have become skilled at matching the body of the prisoner with the amount of rose oil. However, there are still prisoners who take me by surprise. Emanuel, the poucher, roused from his unconsciousness rambling, "Deliver the cube. Must deliver. Conveyor belts." His words meant nothing to me. The prisoners rarely tried to address me in English: everyone knew I spoke their language quite well. I grabbed him and hushed his manic rant. Emanuel calmed down and looked at me with his frightened eyes. He spoke: "The machine must travel. We are late. north ajkbeguines." As his voice resonated within me it felt important, maybe even prophetic. I asked him what I could do to help, if there was an answer to this riddle. He cried and said, "Conveyor belts.”

There is definitely some RUSH references in there.
 

Baha

Member
If you do the following above, please take a screenshot and upload it to your profile. You may not qualify now but you might qualify later based on what the requirements change to. We're currently looking for a Fortification Engineering Specialist from Yamatsumi.
 

JaseC

gave away the keys to the kingdom.
Really tempted to buy the Sack so I can help out where possible, but that leaves me with just $50 until Monday. :p

Then again, Monday is a day-and-a-half away.
 

Rur0ni

Member
Someone on my list qualifies, but only one guy online, and he's treating me like I'm a bot or something because I'm asking him to do something, great. :lol.
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
Fucking Kotaku holding the last piece and being too slow to post it. A living parody of themselves.
 

raphier

Banned
EatChildren said:
Fucking Kotaku holding the last piece and being too slow to post it. A living parody of themselves.
:lol Something tells me they have no idea what's it for and are trying to solve the numbers...

How'd you know they have the last one?
 

Saty

Member
raphier said:
How'd you know they have the last one?
From the Wiki page:
17:00: The real last image of the bathysphere puzzle has been found (check this tweet). It was sent to Kotaku but in true fashion they didn't get around to posting it (proof). The old image (on the left here) was a confirmed troll.
 

Rur0ni

Member
MNC said:
What does it say exactly if someone on your list qualifies?

Code:
Our records indicate that someone on your colleague list qualifies.
Perhaps you could ask them to volunteer?
 

Nabs

Member
Someone on your list qualifies:

defensegrid2011-04-090dpdi.jpg
 
SalsaShark said:
If anything it would be that if people solve the ARG we all get it early. Valve wouldnt give it free and early to one or two guys, LOL

It could be added to the Potato sack at release, so all potato sack owners get it free, perhaps?
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
raphier said:
:lol Something tells me they have no idea what's it for and are trying to solve the numbers...

How'd you know they have the last one?

From the Wiki:

* 17:00: The real last image of the bathysphere puzzle has been found (check this tweet). It was sent to Kotaku but in true fashion they didn't get around to posting it (proof). The old image (on the left here) was a confirmed troll.

Also, for those wondering why people are coming to the conclusion that Portal 2 might unlock a couple of days early, it comes from the numbers and symbols in the bathysphere puzzle. When decoded they read ""4/19/2011 7AM = 4/15/2011 9AM"". 4/19/2011 7AM is when the Steam countdown for Portal 2's unlock ends.

edit: beaten
 

Baha

Member
Now the qualifications are Artillery Expert from June (day of enlistment). If you meet these requirements, do the process again and it'll ask you a question in order to qualify this time around.
 

Salsa

Member
Graphics Horse said:
It could be added to the Potato sack at release, so all potato sack owners get it free, perhaps?

This would be complete and ubber shit. I have no interest in The Beautiful end of the world or 1..2..3.. Kick it! and im not buying those two games just to get a couple of items cause im not a digital item whore. Not gonna buy games i dont wanna play, and i pre-ordered Portal 2 a long time ago. I'd be mad as HELL.

Not gonna happen though.
 

Baha

Member
And we're stuck again. We're looking for an Admiral from the IX (9th) Brigade. If you meet this requirement, post your screenshot and question so we can help you answer and keep this moving along. To clarify, if you meet these requirements go do sign_up again and it should ask you a question.
 

BY2K

Membero Americo
Wow, the Amnesia puzzle is still going and the Aperture Login page still hasn't been found.
 

TheOGB

Banned
So what's all this about qualifying, now?

EDIT: Just read the instructions on the Wiki, but do we know what this all leads to yet?
 
they just broke the third amnesia rar. Only one left, but it looks like a hard one.

edit: Oh, and they've found sort of real life apparently related bathysphere on google maps. Some people are heading that way now. Wish I lived out there, can't do too much out here in Tennessee.
 

Baha

Member
Want a potato? Load up AudioSurf and play this song. It's fairly short, like 30 seconds maybe less. Play that on ninja mono and after completing it, it should load the aperture science page in the steam overlay. Use "rail rider" w/o quotations to login. Doing so will make AudioSurf download an update. The result?
Check out the tater next to my name: http://steamcommunity.com/id/BahaFS/
 

TheOGB

Banned
Baha said:
Want a potato? Load up AudioSurf and play this song. It's fairly short, like 30 seconds maybe less. Play that on ninja mono and after completing it, it should load the aperture science page in the steam overlay. Use "rail rider" w/o quotations to login. Doing so will make AudioSurf download an update. The result?
Check out the tater next to my name: http://steamcommunity.com/id/BahaFS/
brb getting a potato
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
Baha said:
Want a potato? Load up AudioSurf and play this song. It's fairly short, like 30 seconds maybe less. Play that on ninja mono and after completing it, it should load the aperture science page in the steam overlay. Use "rail rider" w/o quotations to login. Doing so will make AudioSurf download an update. The result?
Check out the tater next to my name: http://steamcommunity.com/id/BahaFS/

Oh boy! Once they get a SMB login I'll get a tato!
 

Baha

Member
The password for AaAaAAA!'s aperture page has also been uncovered: http://valvearg.com/wiki/AaAaAA!!!_A_Reckless_Disregard_for_Gravity
Login for AAAAAA aperture science page is discovered to be "long fall",

I don't own this game but for those of you who do, you can get a 2nd potato by doing this.

Login for Killing Floor Aperture Science login page is "failed experiments", taken from the news tab in the server browser. Logging in here grants you a potato and again, an update containing more DLC.

Login for The wonderful end of the world aperture login page is found to be ""every piece". Logging in here grants you another potato and it also updates.
 

Datwheezy

Unconfirmed Member
Baha said:
The password for AaAaAAA!'s aperture page has also been uncovered: http://valvearg.com/wiki/AaAaAA!!!_A_Reckless_Disregard_for_Gravity
Login for AAAAAA aperture science page is discovered to be "long fall",

I don't own this game but for those of you who do, you can get a 2nd potato by doing this.

Login for Killing Floor Aperture Science login page is "failed experiments", taken from the news tab in the server browser. Logging in here grants you a potato and again, an update containing more DLC.

Login for The wonderful end of the world aperture login page is found to be ""every piece". Logging in here grants you another potato and it also updates.

OH GOD VALVE, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! What do these potatoes MEAN?!
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
Boil em mash em stick em in a stew.
 

Baha

Member
Anybody here capable of hosting a KF server? Add me on Steam (BahaFS) I know a super easy way of getting the potato so we can login.

Also: Login for Cogs Aperture Science login page is "movable panels", taken from the emailed picture. Logging in here grants you a potato and again, an update to the game.

[EDIT] Nvm, got a friend to set up a server.
 

Jive Turkey

Unconfirmed Member
Baha said:
Want a potato? Load up AudioSurf and play this song. It's fairly short, like 30 seconds maybe less. Play that on ninja mono and after completing it, it should load the aperture science page in the steam overlay. Use "rail rider" w/o quotations to login. Doing so will make AudioSurf download an update. The result?
Check out the tater next to my name: http://steamcommunity.com/id/BahaFS/
Haha got mine. Thanks!
 

Vastag

Member
Baha said:
Login for Killing Floor Aperture Science login page is "failed experiments", taken from the news tab in the server browser. Logging in here grants you a potato and again, an update containing more DLC.

I'm downloading KF just to try this
 

Baha

Member
All newly updated games contain archive files with alpha-numerical names. Check IRC and Aperture Science login page for further details as they come in. The Audiosurf file contains concept art for Portal 2.

Extra incentive for getting those potatoes!
 

Forkball

Member
Thanks for the Audiosurf tip, I have a potato in my profile now. Damn, this ARG is insane. How are people decoding all this stuff so quickly?
 

Forkball

Member
Those pictures were found in an Audiosurf file. Logging in with the correct passwords after doing certain things in each game give you a potato on your profile, so you get a new potato for each password you input. So far all of the passwords haven't been unlocked yet, so no one has all 13 potatoes. Also, this pic was in the Audiosurf file as well.

80497432.jpg
 
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