-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Why do girls play stupid games?
- Thread starter Diablos
- Start date
- Status
ah, but (and I really shouldn't be giving women advice to the one that the fate of the world hangs on) acting indifferent to a girl who expects men's attention will work in your favor regardless. Even if she was in no way attracted to you before, she will be at least in some small part. I think it shows individuality, independence, confidence, etc.
But this thread IS about girls playing games.. which assumes that they have some interest to begin with.
But this thread IS about girls playing games.. which assumes that they have some interest to begin with.
WrathOfOtaibah
Banned
Its a girl's way of separating the wheat from the chaff. The guy took too long. He waffled around. She lost interest in him. End of story. When a girl wants the guy's number, take the hint that it was a failure. Girls, especially ones who are attractive, seldomly call guys unless the guy is insanely attractive or if they have been going out for a while. She doesn't need to; she's attractive and can have her pick of the litter. This is what happened.
Interest one month prior != Interest at that moment
Interest one month prior != Interest at that moment
Fresh Prince
Banned
Tell your friend to move on with her best friend.
Teknopathetic said:"Oh how I hate this "meh, girls are a dime a dozen, who cares?" attitude"
I fucking *hate* the idea of defending cubsfan, but:
It's not "meh, girls are a dime a dozen" so much as it is, why waste your time on something that obviously isn't going to work. It's borderline sad.
I agree 100% with this. And the whole thing about girls playing games because they get approached so much and gotta seperate the wheat from the chaff thing. I used to think that those "stupid" games girls play are retarded as hell, but now that I understand what's behind it all it doesn't bother me much. Usually it just provides me a great warning sign that this girl is not my type at all, which saves me tons of time.
Games are part of a gender system we all need to stop. I suggest not playing them for both girls and boys. For guys, you got to recognize when you're about to play a role in the game and when she is just being a "dumb girl" and just stop cold right there. If you continue on, if you have to be cocky n funny or 'test' people out with silly mind games then your relatinship is doomed. It will rely on patterns that never satisfy and you won't ever really connect for the wall of gender mindsets is between the two of you. When the chick said "let me get your number", he should have immediatly called her on it(being weasely) or forgotten about her. If presented with a mind game and you respond by not playing your role and instead use honesty then she/he will either be awestruck or scared to death.
Yes, I am totally serious.
Yes, I am totally serious.
I agree. 'Cept, she's being a little spoiled. I have seen this girl, she's pretty good looking, but if she thinks she can do better than my friend I think she's a little stubborn. I don't know how much better she thinks things are going to get for herself... I mean she's good looking yeah, far from ugly, but I've seen a lot better.The Experiment said:
WrathOfOtaibah
Banned
Because they are masters at indirectness and subtlety. Understand these subtleties and you'll be ahead of most men. It'll help you from getting stood up, cheated on, etc. If you are to talk to girls directly, 95% won't give you a direct answer back. However if you read between the lines, you can get their answer. For this guy here, when she asked for his number, this was the indirect way of saying, "Thanks but no thanks." If he stews about it any longer, he's just wasting his time and can drive him nuts.
I don't think it is as easy as all of that but whats the alternative: obsessing about it? The alternatives to that is worse than brushing her off. If you obsess about her, the girl will think you're a creep ass, tell all her friends, and boom, you got a rep for being a creep. I've seen it happen. You can't talk to the girl about it afterward because when she says no the first time, thats pretty much it. Maybe years down the road he could ask her again but she just didn't find him attractive.
Its better to be that guy who writes it off than be that guy who gets shot down all the time but can't take the hint. TV and Movies are a lot different than how it is in the real world.
I don't know her so in her mind, she may think she's a perfect 10 when she could be a 6 or a 7. If she gets a lot of attention from guys, her standards will be high. Its like men though too. If you get a lot of attention from women, you're confidence is going to high and so will your standards.
Tell your buddy to keep his chin up.
I'm still pissed I cheated on my last GF.
FUCK.
She's dating some complete fucking tool right now, too, which makes things even worse cuz I'm painfully aware of what I had. I want to ruin their relationship, but I'm not going to because I respect her.
(yes, yes, "you respect her yet you cheated on her..yada yada yda"...save the nonsense)
I still don't know what the fuck I was thinking screwing around with that other girl.
Fucking women.
FUCK.
She's dating some complete fucking tool right now, too, which makes things even worse cuz I'm painfully aware of what I had. I want to ruin their relationship, but I'm not going to because I respect her.
(yes, yes, "you respect her yet you cheated on her..yada yada yda"...save the nonsense)
I still don't know what the fuck I was thinking screwing around with that other girl.
Fucking women.
Boogie, honestly, I wouldn't be surprised that the girls in your age group are simply not quite sure how old you are, and aren't able to accurately gauge the situation and scenario. I mean, from all the pictures you've posted, you look like you're about to hit 30, no offense.
For all I know, they're thinking "Why is that old man staring at me?" You're a good looking chap, no doubt, but imo you look quite a bit older than 21.
For all I know, they're thinking "Why is that old man staring at me?" You're a good looking chap, no doubt, but imo you look quite a bit older than 21.
I think this girl is a freak though. When he asked her, she instantly said yes. Instantly. She didn't hold back or anything. And she started blushing and got kind of excited. I seriously think, that despite the fact my poor friend waited almost a month before getting his shit together, that this girl is just insane.The Experiment said:
He could just as easily say she's a slut for leading him on and then playing games, even after she flirted and whatnot. Bad rep for her to other guys that might want to ask her out.
True, but I am now encouraging my friend to step up and be a man. Girls play games - guys say what the fuck they want to say. This is how I see things, at least. "Playing the game back" as a means of "brushing it off" is the pussiest thing I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, he could just wait until she finally says something a month from now when all of her friends are going out with other people and say "sorry, I have plans this week" too, but that's WEAK! I want him to approach her and say: "If you didn't want to go out with me, you should have said no instead of putting it off a week, telling me you would call but then putting it off yet another week and basically ignoring me since I asked you. I wouldn't do that to you, why'd you do it to me?" Put her on the spot. If she gets pissed, then just say "I'm not stupid, don't play games with me." If she gets all upset and feels like crying or gets confused, then you just put the girl in her place, congratulations. Plain, simple, and to the point. Who cares if she thinks he is crazy? Clearly she doesn't have much respect for him to begin with, so he has nothing to lose and everything to gain at this point, fortunately and unfortunately. It's Wednesday, she said she would call him this week. Nobody calls on Thursday to make plans for Friday or Saturday, especailly a week after you were supposed to AND for a first date. What a whore.
This is true, but someday she's gonna wake up and realize those guys didn't really care much for her. She was seeing some guy before him that she really liked, but he admitted to just wanting sex and not a real relationship. She wanted something serious and then perhaps sex. This turned her off so she backed off from him. Clearly, like I said, this girl is insane. She doesn't want sex, yet doesnt' even want to start a fucking friendship which could possibly lead to a relationship. C-r-a-z-y.
Boogie said what I wanted to.
yeah ignoring her and going after other girls; what a pussy thing to do
translation: I have no hope in attracting other women, and I had nothing else going on in my life, so I anxiously waited for your phone call, after not getting the hint in the first place.
cmon man this is weak
She's a slut for leading him on and playing games? I wonder what you call girls who, gasp, actually have and enjoy sex!
:lol :lol :lol
No, she's a WOMAN. Play their game. Turn the tables. Make THEM work.
And if you're buddy isn't going to chin up, then he's an even bigger pussy than beforehand.
As for the "She said yes instantly" crap. What's that got to do with anything? Just because she was intinially attracted to him doesn't mean she's going to stay that way -- especially after weeks of nothing at all.
:lol :lol :lol
No, she's a WOMAN. Play their game. Turn the tables. Make THEM work.
And if you're buddy isn't going to chin up, then he's an even bigger pussy than beforehand.
As for the "She said yes instantly" crap. What's that got to do with anything? Just because she was intinially attracted to him doesn't mean she's going to stay that way -- especially after weeks of nothing at all.
Cubsfan23 said:
....
I hate you
Incognito said:
I know you're a jerk and probably just trying to troll me, but still:
NLB2 said:Yeah man, untook those shirts and let your hair grow out a bit. Ditch those glasses, too!
I'm afraid contacts are a no-go with me. Can't imagine sticking something in my eye. And I think the longer my hair gets, the more ridiculous I look.
Wellington
BAAAALLLINNN'
My one rule with women is simple. In fact, it's not even a rule, it's a principle, and one that i learned from something that was related to Cubsfan (I forgot exactly what, though).
Simply put: Attraction is not a choice.
Learn how to tell when a girl is attracted to you.
Learn how to react to a girl who is attracted to you immediately.
Only way to make her lose the attraction to you is to somehow do something fucking stupid and completely unnatural. If she's already attracted, she likes you for you.
Waiting a month = letting the initial attraction pass.
Seriously, when you're attracted to a female, can you just turn it off? I sure can't. Something has to happen to end that.
Simply put: Attraction is not a choice.
Learn how to tell when a girl is attracted to you.
Learn how to react to a girl who is attracted to you immediately.
Only way to make her lose the attraction to you is to somehow do something fucking stupid and completely unnatural. If she's already attracted, she likes you for you.
Waiting a month = letting the initial attraction pass.
Seriously, when you're attracted to a female, can you just turn it off? I sure can't. Something has to happen to end that.
Wellington: I agree 100%, but my problem is her acting all snobby and messing with him just because he didn't ask when it was right for her snobby ass. He didn't agree to anything when she initally dropped hints, so there is no excuse for this BS.
Lonestar: Yeah, he put her off for a few weeks but he never AGREED to go out, that's the difference. AFTER that when he asked, that's when she instantly said yes and said she'd call. This is where it gets fucked up.
I don't care if she's having sex or what, good for her, it's just not cool to play games like that. But I don't think she is having sex, considering she turned some guy down for trying to have sex before getting in a relationship even though she obsessed over this dude. Like I said she's weird.
Cubsfan:
But the fact that she dropped a hint that was sugar-coated in a lie was just fucking low. When she did that, it's almost no better than saying "I'm a snobby, spoiled, lying brat and I do absolutely nothing but lead other guys on for shits and giggles." Doesn't make her look too good either, you must admit.
Your translation isn't so accurate. I guess you could cut out the drama and just say "you could have said no if you didn't want to go out." But come on, you have to agree that he needs to say something. I don't believe in just backing off, that makes her look like the winner.
Lonestar: Yeah, he put her off for a few weeks but he never AGREED to go out, that's the difference. AFTER that when he asked, that's when she instantly said yes and said she'd call. This is where it gets fucked up.
I don't care if she's having sex or what, good for her, it's just not cool to play games like that. But I don't think she is having sex, considering she turned some guy down for trying to have sex before getting in a relationship even though she obsessed over this dude. Like I said she's weird.
Cubsfan:
But the fact that she dropped a hint that was sugar-coated in a lie was just fucking low. When she did that, it's almost no better than saying "I'm a snobby, spoiled, lying brat and I do absolutely nothing but lead other guys on for shits and giggles." Doesn't make her look too good either, you must admit.
Your translation isn't so accurate. I guess you could cut out the drama and just say "you could have said no if you didn't want to go out." But come on, you have to agree that he needs to say something. I don't believe in just backing off, that makes her look like the winner.
Cubsfan23 said:
She obviously thinks she accomplished something by blowing him off twice now!
Yes, and ignoring her will make her think "thank god he finally got it, he's not going to keep asking why I didn't call." Approaching her will make her think "okay, maybe I should've been honest with this guy and told him no, he's not a dumb as I thought." Even if she thinks he's a creep, who cares, like I said it's not like she has much respect for him now anyway...
You act like most guys have 10 other girls to go to, but that's not always the case. This would be ridiculous if he knew a bunch of other girls right now, but he doesn't, so it's easy to see why this is bothering him so much.
Diablos said:
I think this is the difference in perspectives, where Cubsfan doesn't quite "get" where some of us are coming from (though I'm sure he'll say that he does). For me, it isn't a matter of turning around the corner and finding another girl who will be attracted to you.
Only ONE girl has ever shown any interest in me, PERIOD. It doesn't matter if I started asking out girls by the dozen; if they're not attracted, they're not going to say yes. So all of this "forget about it, there are tons of women out there" doesn't mean shit when you don't even really know how a girl can become attracted to you :-/
Generally speaking, it is not.Cubsfan23 said:
When you are willing to invest time and money to someone that said they were interested in you, and then they start messing with your head, then it IS in my opinion. Backing off just makes you look like a pawn. You realize this "you could have said no" speech is not supposed to be a second chance; rather, a "fuck off I don't want to talk to you anymore" kind of thing.
Mike Works
Member
Boogy and Cubsfan direly need a buddy cop show.
Cubsfan23 said:Yeah I decided to learn this stuff just for the fun of it
Well, it certainly doesn't seem to register with you that WOMEN HAVEN'T SHOWN ANY INTEREST IN ME.
You just keep on with your patronizing "We'll have Boogie dating a dozen girls in the next thirty days" shtick. I'm just getting really tired of your mocking laughter.
Mike Works said:
FUCK YEAH
This fall, on Fox.....
psycho_snake
I went to WAGs boutique and all I got was a sniff
The simple answer to the initail question is that they are women
A lot of people my age do the same thing. If a guy they dont like approaches them, they will just act nice, but they dont actually mena it. If you keep calling them and they dont answer or they dont call you, they are not interested in you. Its not really a game, its another way of saying fuck off.
A lot of people my age do the same thing. If a guy they dont like approaches them, they will just act nice, but they dont actually mena it. If you keep calling them and they dont answer or they dont call you, they are not interested in you. Its not really a game, its another way of saying fuck off.
WrathOfOtaibah
Banned
:lol I've been down that road. Thats pretty much the only advice I can give. If he really wants to get in this girl's pants, he's going to have to wait for a few years.
Yeah. She led him on. The only real way to tell if she is interested is not getting asked out, or calling her up, or even on the first date, but if there is a chance of a second. Some girls are just too nice to turn down a guy and sometimes too nice to stand a guy up. The first date is always the best way to see if she's really interested or just killing time. Thats why the first dates should be the cheap dates. Not because you're a penny pinching cheap ass but its a test. Do some simple and fun things like bowling or walking or something. If she's interested, you'll have a second date. Plus, even if she turns out to be someone just out for a free meal, you can still enjoy yourself too.
I usually bowl at this one place because there's a nice arcade, complete with 3rd Strike. This girl was a total prick to me. She was shocked that I would dishonor her by doing something like bowling instead of paying out the ass. I dressed nice when I got her number (note: rich looking) so she probably thought I was some sucker to be taken advantage of. The date went downhill as soon as I rolled up in my mid 90s model car. She would give me smartass answers. So my answer was to play 3rd Strike for an hour after the game was done. I was kicking ass.
Got off topic but there are ways where a girl can try to treat a man like complete shit and the guy can still come out unscathed and on top.
Yeah but if she's cute and is willing to put out, nobody will give a damn about her rep.
Pretty much. Games is just a bullshit method of finding out good men from the dumbasses. The only way she won't play games is if the guy is really famous or really attractive. I don't know about your friend but if he is neither, its best he starts knowing all the games.
He should have said that when it happened. Now it would just seem like obsession...to her. There's nothing wrong with calling a girl out on her BS. From what I hear, some find it attractive. Why, I don't know.
This is called the early-mid 30s. When her boobs start to sag, gets a few wrinkles, her ass explodes and loses its shape, she starts to get fat, and has a couple children. Thats when most women start to go after the nice guys.
Just a quick update.
Oh man. At first I thought my buddy was being dumb, but she has proven herself to be the worst - why? Because she's too much of a coward to confess she really didn't want to. He approached her and said "if you didn't want to go out you could have turned me down, it's not like I was going to cry myself to sleep if you said that." To which she replied "I swear I'm not being a bitch, we'll go out" blah blah blah. Then she started talking about how she went out and got drunk with a bunch of people and was hungover, etc. She also talked about how she was hanging out with her friend she hasn't seen in a while, blah blah. But she STILL realllllly wants to go out!!! This is what she says to him! :lol If that were the case, why would my friend have to approach her TWO times? And if she really wanted to go out but "didn't have the time," why could she find the time to get drunk off her ass with some girls until the wee hours in the morning and hang out with her friend she hasn't seen in months? If she REALLY wanted to go out, she would have called or approached him a couple times, too.
Funny how now she's all mad at him and stuff, and even talked on the phone to her friend in front of him and said she was gonna get changed to go out that night. Man, she's saying one thing and doing another, and actually thinks my friend isn't going to get it. :lol :lol
Oh man. At first I thought my buddy was being dumb, but she has proven herself to be the worst - why? Because she's too much of a coward to confess she really didn't want to. He approached her and said "if you didn't want to go out you could have turned me down, it's not like I was going to cry myself to sleep if you said that." To which she replied "I swear I'm not being a bitch, we'll go out" blah blah blah. Then she started talking about how she went out and got drunk with a bunch of people and was hungover, etc. She also talked about how she was hanging out with her friend she hasn't seen in a while, blah blah. But she STILL realllllly wants to go out!!! This is what she says to him! :lol If that were the case, why would my friend have to approach her TWO times? And if she really wanted to go out but "didn't have the time," why could she find the time to get drunk off her ass with some girls until the wee hours in the morning and hang out with her friend she hasn't seen in months? If she REALLY wanted to go out, she would have called or approached him a couple times, too.
Funny how now she's all mad at him and stuff, and even talked on the phone to her friend in front of him and said she was gonna get changed to go out that night. Man, she's saying one thing and doing another, and actually thinks my friend isn't going to get it. :lol :lol
WrathOfOtaibah
Banned
There are moments when the "fuck and dump" strategy is ingenious. This is one of those times.
robertsan21
Member
well if you have good looks on your side these problem does not exist!
thanks god that i am good looking
thanks god that i am good looking
robertsan21
Member
Diablos said:
hey Diablos you know i am sexy
robertsan21
Member
...
- Status