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[StoOgE]

Hmm, so I wound up dating one of my best friends roomates. We went out 3 or 4 times a week for about two weeks, made it official somewhere in the middle, and were having alot of fun. Probably been going out for 3 weeks at this point, but I havent seen her since last Friday because Im killing myself with finals. Evidently, waiting more than 5 days without a guy getting his nut off in her is too much, so she slept with some guy on Monday... so I get a phone call from my friend telling me as such. She told me she was drunk off her ass and feels really bad.. so I figure I would give her a chance to fess up to doing it, be pissed at her but let it go (Im a really easy going guy, and wasnt even mad at this point). Then I get a call today from my friend telling me that she did it again last night with another completely random guy.

The thing is, Im still not really mad. I mean, we are completely through, but I have to play it cool so my friend doesnt get in shit for ratting the girl out... whats really funny is, she was a virgin up until we started dating (no, Im not taking her word for it, this is from my friend who has lived with her since they graduated high school (they went to the same school) and were best friends in high school, so I figure she would know if anyone would.

I mean, I guess she was a nympho but didnt know it, and yes Im getting blood work done just to be safe, but Ive not been with her since she decided to go the community bicycle route and wrapped it up then as well. At this rate the poor girl is going to have every STD known to man in less than a month.

 

[Matlock]

At least you won't get lousy head.

 

[StoOgE]

At least you won't get lousy head.

no, she wasnt down with that at all

 

[Escape Goat]

The virgins are never safe dating material. I know with alot of gay people, when they first come out they are just sleeping with everyone because its all new. Sorry to hear of your misfortune.

 

[Ristamar]

1) Thankfully she was clean before all of this went down (hopefully).
2) At least you had the sense to kick her to the curb.

 

[borghe]

no, she wasnt down with that at all

the noobs never are... she just likes the dick right now.. she needs an asshole to come in and lay the smack down on every orifice. that's when they become good.

 

[StoOgE]

The virgins are never safe dating material. I know with alot of gay people, when they first come out they are just sleeping with everyone because its all new. Sorry to hear of your misfortune.

Yeah, I know that is exactly what she is going through right now Im sure... throw in the fact that Ive disapeared off the face of the planet until Friday night and it was a recipe for trouble. Thats probably why Im not really that mad at her..

 

[Tedesco!]

At least you won't get lousy head.

Well said.

 

[Drexon]

Ahh, you're in the generation Y , as in Y care. Welcome. Nice story.

 

[theREBELins]

Only good thing about dating a slut is when it's all over, then you'll have a booty call for almost any time of the day. I don't see myself being in a serious relationship anytime soon, so this works to my benefit, as I prefer the 'no strings attached' deal of dating. I realize you'll probably have nothing to do with this girl again, but I just wanted to show that in some cases, you can get the advantage

But otherwise, I think you acted appropriately due to what she did, especially since you weren't actually supposed to know - good lookin out for your friend there.

 

[ChrisReid]

So she lost her virginity one day, and was with three people in two weeks?

 

[StoOgE]

So she lost her virginity one day, and was with three people in two weeks?

yepp.. I mean, I guess if you are going to go for it, you might as well go all the way.

I guess I should clear this up a bit. She also recently discovered alchohol, she was raised Baptist and her parents were fairly strict about her even going out with friends during high school. She didnt do any sort of extracurriculat stuff, so she is extremely sheltered person, and I guess she has gone into repressed desire mode being unleashed all at once.

The monday evening incident was a combination of her being drunk, horny, and one of her friends (that I dont know) "tricking" her into going into a guys bedroom with him. This is all second hand, but thats what Ive been told.

The tuesday incident also involved her being drunk (they were downtown).. her roomates (my friend) boyfriend stayed over that night. He had brought a friend along with him downtown (whom my friend had never met), and they rode together.. so when her boyfriend stayed over the guy was supposed to be on the couch. When my friend woke up the next morning her roomate (my now ex girlfriend) and her boyfriends friend were both bare ass naked on the couch asleep.

So, it wasnt completely random, and she wasnt out looking to get some.. but I guess it was there so she went for it... which I cant get too upset about, because our relationship started in a similar manner, though Ive known/liked her for a few years.

 

[Pedigree Chum]

So she lost her virginity one day, and was with three people in two weeks?

Only real discrepancy in the story, makes no sense.

 

[borghe]

no discrepancy... some chicks are like that.

back when I was in high school I actually knew a number of chicks.. mind you they were virgins until like 15, 16 tops... but yeah, once the cherry popped (at 15 or 16) they pretty much were indiscriminate with who they got down with.

 

[radioheadrule83]

From the scenario you detailed, maybe it was hard getting hold of you, and maybe she didn't think things were too serious. Although if I were in your position and I'd liked her, I'd of hoped it was serious myself tbh... and I'd of expected some consideration.

I still don't understand why people can't just tell someone that they don't want to be in a serious relationship with them, tell them if they don't want to be attached to anybody, or that they want to be with someone else or that they want to go around fucking other people. Why people can't just bite a bullet, tell the truth and save people a whole lot of bother. Preferable to deceit on all occasions.

At least your friend came through so you weren't strung along for any more weeks or even months etc.

If she ever stops being a nymhomaniac and shows you any interest ever again, use and abuse. Dispense the sweet justice on her face (or in the butt).

 

[dskillzhtown]

You made things official in 2 weeks? After 3 dates? I am thinking that 2 weeks is not enough foundation to form any kind of real commitment to anyone.

 

[StoOgE]

You made things official in 2 weeks? After 3 dates? I am thinking that 2 weeks is not enough foundation to form any kind of real commitment to anyone.

generally I agree, but I have a bad habit of running women off because I wait too long to make it official, and I knew it was her first time, so I thought I should ask her out so that she didnt think I was just some jerk who was using her... but yeah, if she ever calls me back up, it is likely I will be some jerk who uses her.

 

[dskillzhtown]

generally I agree, but I have a bad habit of running women off because I wait too long to make it official, and I knew it was her first time, so I thought I should ask her out so that she didnt think I was just some jerk who was using her... but yeah, if she ever calls me back up, it is likely I will be some jerk who uses her.

Just looks like to me she might be in 'experimental stage'. I say play her and get some while you can, if it was good. But I am sure the moral peeps of GAF will come in and tell you to just leave her alone. That is always an option as well.

 

[WrathOfOtaibah]

Only real discrepancy in the story, makes no sense.

I take it you've never experienced college freshmen? I swear at my college, the girls that come in as virgins six months later will give no questions asked head. A whole new world opens up for them and they take advantage of it as much as possible.

 

[StoOgE]

I take it you've never experienced college freshmen? I swear at my college, the girls that come in as virgins six months later will give no questions asked head. A whole new world opens up for them and they take advantage of it as much as possible.

another good point, she is 3 years younger than me, which would put her at Freshman/sophmore in college age range, if she went to college. Throw in her puritanical family and a lack of college, she hasnt really had much world experience.

The thing that is bugging me is the only other girl I really have any interest in at the moment is a sophmore at UT, is a virgin, has only started partying in the last 6 months, has started smoking weed about a month ago, and Im pretty sure she is into me (she has gone so far as to say that I have changed her outlook on life because of one hour long convo in a coffee shop).. but then I look at my tag and I tell myself its a bad idea.

 

[borghe]

another good point, she is 3 years younger than me, which would put her at Freshman/sophmore in college age range, if she went to college. Throw in her puritanical family and a lack of college, she hasnt really had much world experience.

yup, she seriously needs a top notch bastard to give her some real world experience.. that's all that ever ends up whipping that type of chick into line. someone to screw her over real good after getting used 15 different ways (physically and emotionally).

sorry to sound jaded.. experienced this same thing with my first girlfriend like 14 years ago.. was a pleasure to watch her downfall and learn what to do in future such situations.

 

[StoOgE]

sorry to sound jaded.. experienced this same thing with my first girlfriend like 14 years ago.. was a pleasure to watch her downfall and learn what to do in future such situations.

Im the same way, I've had a couple of girlfriends in high school do this, so Im not that upset. I actually think her roomate is more pissed off than I am about the whole thing.

 

[darscot]

I see no reason to be the slightest bit upset in this situation. Your young she's young no harm no foul in my book. I see no reason to panic about STD unless your not smart enough to use a condom. I've never understood why people (both men and women) get all worked up over this kind of thing. Your dating not married!

When will guys learn there is no such thing as a slut. A slut is just a girl that did something to someone else you wished she did to you.

 

[Ryck]

yup, she seriously needs a top notch bastard to give her some real world experience.. that's all that ever ends up whipping that type of chick into line. someone to screw her over real good after getting used 15 different ways (physically and emotionally).

sorry to sound jaded.. experienced this same thing with my first girlfriend like 14 years ago.. was a pleasure to watch her downfall and learn what to do in future such situations.

Yup pretty much nailed it right there, Stooge I say take what you can and then run...

 

[Ristamar]

A slut is just a girl that did something to someone else you wished she did to you.

Ah, if it were only that simple...

 

[darscot]

It IS that simple! The sooner you realize that statement is true the better off you'll be. If a girl sleeps around or anything like that it dosen't make her a bad person or "slut". It may mean she is not a good match for you but thats all it means. Never confuse sex and loyalty.

 

[StoOgE]

I've never understood why people (both men and women) get all worked up over this kind of thing. Your dating not married!
.

This is why Im not that upset.. I mean, had we been dating long it would be different, but at this point in the relationship there is little attachment beyond physical attraction (not to sound to jaded, but I think its this way with all relationships, until a few months in you dont know if you actually like someone or you just like sticking it to them).

Though, it isnt cool that she is trying to hide it from me... Im not mad at all, Im just upset that it didnt work out, beacause we were getting along pretty well.

 

[StoOgE]

It IS that simple! The sooner you realize that statement is true the better off you'll be. If a girl sleeps around or anything like that it dosen't make her a bad person or "slut". It may mean she is not a good match for you but thats all it means. Never confuse sex and loyalty.

I agree to some extent. I dont think it makes her a bad person, but I dont think in general sleeping around is the worlds best idea, which is why their is a stigma against it.. this situation has multiple paternity tests written all over it.

 

[Ristamar]

It IS that simple! The sooner you realize that statement is true the better off you'll be. If a girl sleeps around or anything like that it dosen't make her a bad person or "slut". It may mean she is not a good match for you but thats all it means. Never confuse sex and loyalty.

I'm not confusing it. I think it's selfish. It has to do with someone who satisfies their physical needs without consideration or regard for the emotional needs and feelings of their partner(s) or significant other(s).

At least there wasnt much harm done in this intance...

 

[darscot]

You have the right attitude and you'll do just fine. Just don't right this girl off yet. She's young and she needs to do her thing. Just keep everything cool maybe down the road things will change. I'ld just talk to her ask her to be honest with you. If you enjoy hanging out and the occasional shag just keep doing it.

In all fairness I have had women on many an occasion get pissed at me for never ending a relationship. The standard "I can't believe we still end up in bed" bit. Or the "We should really stop doing this I've been seeing allot of (insert guys name here) lately." And lastly my personal favorite "Why do you stills see her..." and the whole time you thinking well I still see you dont I.

 

[borghe]

It IS that simple! The sooner you realize that statement is true the better off you'll be. If a girl sleeps around or anything like that it dosen't make her a bad person or "slut". It may mean she is not a good match for you but thats all it means. Never confuse sex and loyalty.

in his situation, not knowing the chick for that long, I don't think she is outright a slut.. but your term dating is abiguous at best. so some chick I have been monogamous with for 2 months, or even six months, going and sleeping around isn't something to be bothered with?

monogamy is a contract, even without marriage. an emotional contract sure, but a contract nonetheless. It isn't the sleeping around that makes the person bad, it is the understanding that a relationship is monogamous (if it in fact is) and what that means, and violating that trust or understanding.

this was how my situation played out. we hooked updated for a while, and she made it clear in no uncertain terms that I "belonged to her" (my words, not hers) and was not on any sort of market. no problem for me, and I would believe that this applied to her also, which she told me was the case. that right there ends all rights to just sleep around and write it off to "eh, you just weren't a match". but it didn't, and thus the frustration. I won't bother going into it more, but I just wanted to point out that the whole philosophy of "nothing is a big deal until you are married" mindset is flawed to say the least. marriage in and of itself for us atheists or agnostics is nothing more than a legal binding, and a tenuous one at best. marriage adds very little sanctity IMHO. what is sanctuous is that agreement between two people that they are devoting the remainder of their lives to each other and expect the other one to do the same. you don't need a license or minister to make that promise.

of course, once I grew up and realized that during high school I had the emotional capacity of a chicklet, it stopped bothering me what had happened then... but it still didn't and doesn't excuse the behavior. and people who say it is alright as long as you aren't married are commitment-phobes looking for ways to justify their inability to form or provide meaningful relationships throughout life. That is fine and dandy when they hook up with other people just as scared of commitment as they are, but I guarantee there are people looking for something meaningful who end up getting hurt along the way.

of course just my two cents.

 

[AntoneM]

yep, one of my friends from highschool became very promiscuous after she lost her virginity. I remeber hearing about her being in a 3some (2 guys) about 3 weeks after she lost her viginity. She's still really cool though

 

[darscot]

I agree with 100% once you and your partner have discussed the fact that you are exclusive to each other. If she sleeps around you have every right to end the relationship. It dosen't make her a "slut". Commitment, loyalty issues for sure. I just hate the term slut and the ways guys paint it with such a wide brush. I personal don't believe in venting my anger or personal emotions. Yes it will sting and hurt like shit but I would never talk shit about a girl. I would consider the excusivity of the relationship ended and go on my way.

 

[Kung Fu Jedi]

This is actually a rather common tale, for both guys and girls. They get away from home, get a chance to spread their wings, try out new things that have always been off limits in the past, and just go wild. The new found freedom is tough for some people to deal with, and this young lady sounds like she has all the classic symptoms. Sex and booze have a lure on everyone, but especially when you are experiencing it all for the first time.

I'm glad you didn't get your heart broke and found all this out before it got too serious. If it doesn't bother you too much, than back off on hanging out with her all the time. Enjoy the times you are together, maybe hit it now and again, and see how things go.

 

[callous]

I, too, have had first dibs on a few girls who went on to become sluts. Most only for a while. Thankfully it happened after the relationships had ended. I guess it's pretty natural. Sex is pretty great when you first discover it, and I can see why people want as much of it as they can get when they first start having it.

 

[Azih]

Personally I call guys and gals who sleep around a whole lot sluts. Is that allright with you darscot?

 

[miyuru]

Just reading this thread makes me hate girls more! Grrrrrr time to stomp on some geese!!!


jk jk jk!

 

[siege]

I married a former slut. It's not that bad.

 

[Boomer]

If a female agrees to become exclusively involved with me, and sleeps around, then yes, she's a slut.

 

[darscot]

Oh how I miss the days...
Hooking up with a girl as she enters that phase or bringing her into it is the best. You can really teach them some shit. There all eager and excited about anything. I curse all you bastards that don't handle it properly! This is were you have the perfect chance to turn them into a truly sexual being. I know some of you pricks make them all insecure and shit and fuck it up for the rest of us.

 

[callous]

I married a former slut. It's not that bad.

Actually, those are often the best. Good on you.

 

[GaimeGuy]

I married a former slut. It's not that bad.

pics?

Better yet: vids?

 

[radioheadrule83]

Basically we shouldn't call girls sluts because then they might think "oh no, I just might be a slut" and stop giving out the goodness so indiscriminately?

Let's not get into the semantics of "slut". It's basically a derogative term we can apply to someone for all manner of reasons. I'm not against the idea of a free spirit, we're all sexual beings, there's nothing wrong with fooling around... but when it's so clear that it is, and expectations are, that your intimate relationship is exclusively shared and monogamous -- holding to such a commitment for a given amount of time is a sacrifice or offering to one another. I'm not one to bestow unnecessary importance in the sanctity of an institution like marriage, I'm not one to eschew the idea of different strokes/folks, I don't point fingers at anyone and judge them prematurely, or believe them deviant. We're all unique in what we are and what we want. One thing I do believe in though is the sanctity of trust. Simply going behind your back without warning is an insult and a violation of trust. You can't blame phases, drugs or alcohol... people know what they're doing enough to know whether it's right or wrong by you, and if they're not even considering you at that time - then that's even fucking worse. I personally think that in a lot of cases where we're lulled into a strong trust in one another, people who break that trust deserve to be tarred and feathered as a warning for all. And yes, it's fine in my book to talk shit about a girl... girls will talk plenty of shit about guys too. "Moving on" is easier with a sense of justice served and/or a bit of closure. Simply allowing people to let you down, shrugging and then moving on? Not an option for some people. Certainly not an option for me.

Having said that, you'll get into things with some people and not be that enamoured to give a damn. Thankfully this fella doesn't sound like he was overly head over heels, so he was okay.

 

[andthebeatgoeson]

I married a former slut. It's not that bad.

You think she's a former slut.

*rimshot*

Sorry.

 

[darscot]

It's not about giving it out to everyone. It's about just having some damn skill. 80% of all the women I've meet that didn't like to give head didn't like it because they thought it made them slutty. What kind of bullshit is that? Lucky for me it's very curable (Thank god for U2 ). The other 20% don't like to do cause the want to get busy which isn't a bad thing.

 

[TheDuce22]

I dont know how you guys can be so forgiving. I have never cheated on a girl and expect the same from them. I like to pretend people are more than mindless sexual organisms.

 

[siege]

You think she's a former slut.

*rimshot*

Sorry.

See, here's the thing. If you marry a 'former' slut and she ends up reverting back to her old ways - you get to swing. On the other hand, if she's kept in check - you have someone in the sack that has some experience.

It's a win-win situation.

 

[Manders]

throw in the fact that Ive disapeared off the face of the planet until Friday night and it was a recipe for trouble. Thats probably why Im not really that mad at her..

dude, it's not your fault. she's just a dirty slut. fuckin twat

 

[Lathentar]

So... ummm... I go to UT.

I slept with a complete stranger last night.... hey, its a big university... right?

 

[Kabuki Waq]

So... ummm... I go to UT.

I slept with a complete stranger last night.... hey, its a big university... right?

Uniersity of TOronto?