Angry Grimace
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
Sunday SUNDAY SUNDAY
JUN 19 | 8 PM ET / 5 PM PT
T-MOBILE ARENA
LAS VEGAS, NV
It's time for yet another WWE PPV. This time it's Money in the Bank, which much like the Royal Rumble is centered around a signature match, which in this case is the Money in the Bank Ladder match, which rewards a briefcase that allegedly contains contract for a WWE World Heavyweight Championship match at the time of the holder's choosing. Typically this means they wait until the dude is beat up and then cash in and pin him while he's hurt. If anyone you like wins the briefcase, they will lose their cash in and be humiliated.
Main Event: Roman Reigns v. Seth Rollins
This is Seth-kun's first televised match and first 1v1 match since he returned at Extreme Rules by running up after the match and hitting Roman with a Pedigree. Despite the fan support for Seth, he is still solidly a face and goes for cheap heat, insulting the crowd at any time he's allowed. His motivation here is that he was stripped of the title when he was injured and Roman never beat him, therefore he believes he is the lineal champion. Possible swerves: Dean Ambrose threatened to win the briefcase and cash in on this match, or the winner. He'd have to win first.
AJ Styles v. John Cena
John Cena returned on Memorial Day to thunderous uh, noise and AJ Styles interrupted him to shake his hand. They were interrupted by what WWE calls the Club, and John Cena gets to call "Bullet Club" because he's Cena and what's Vince gonna do about it. AJ turned solidly heel by turning on Cena when the Club came to ringside. This has had a pretty good build that's been pretty meta (AJ told Cena that guys like him who lose to guys like Cena get buried in the WWE). Possible swerves: at the contract signing, AJ had a choice of a contract that would be a singles match and a contract of unspecified match type that would have Anderson and Gallows at ringside. He chose the singles match, but don't be surprised if shenanigans occur anyways.
Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Sami Zayn v. Kevin Owens v. Alberto Del Rio v. Dean Ambrose v. Chris Jericho v. Antonio Cesaro
The Money in the Bank Ladder match has been around for a long time ever since being invented by Jericho, who finally won it in the 6th running of the event in Appleton. It used to be run at WrestleMania, but now it has its own event. Before the brand split ended they'd run two of them, but now they run just one, even though the brand split is coming back. These are usually entertaining affairs and most of the guys in this match are good workers so this should be a good match. Possible swerves: Bray Wyatt interfered in the match for literally no reason whatsoever last year and he's been off of TV for almost 2 months due to an ankle injury, despite the fact that he's reportedly healthy and cleared. The build to this of course involved lots of 6 man tag matches.
The Rest of the Card:
Tag Title Fatal Four-Way: WWE Tag Team Champions The New Day vs. Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson vs. Enzo Amore & Big Cass vs. The Vaudevillains (Fatal 4-Way Match)[/U]
The Teddy Long match (no, really). Not much to say about it other than its what it says on the tin. Almost every permutation of these teams have fought each other on SD and Raw already.
U.S. Champion Rusev vs. Titus O'Neil
This is the match where we see if Vince has the stones to make Celebrity Father of the Year Titus O'Neill get squashed by a guy whose gimmick is hating America on Father's Day.
WWE Women’s Champion Charlotte & Dana Brooke vs. Natalya & Becky Lynch
Charlotte dumped Ric Flair cruelly after the last PPV for being a bad father, and then everyone came to Ric's defense even though she cheated constantly with Ric's help. This is Dana's first PPV - she was promoted with her NXT gimmick of being Emma's lackey, but Emma underwent surgery for a back issue a week after Dana's promotion so she was put with Charlotte. It's a shaky team with a lot of friction, however. Becky and Natalya are playing completely straight baby-faces here who just think Charlotte is a jerk.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin
This is the fifth time they've faced off, and the third straight PPV, but the only PPV in which they actually made the main card.
Apollo Crews vs. Sheamus
Sheamus is upset because Shane keeps calling this the "new era" and he lost to Zayn in the MITB qualifier, so he went backstage and beat up Apollo Crews.
There's a preshow of 2 matches as well, which are obviously just throw-away matches, but they are at least normally called by Mauro Ranallo, who is an actual good play-by-play guy.
Preshow: The Lucha Dragons vs. The Dudley Boyz (Kickoff Match)
I believe this one is legitimately a random match out of thin air with no build.
Preshow: The Golden Truth vs. Breezango
Breezango is Tyler Breeze and Fandango doing a Zoolander-esque gimmick. Golden Truth is R-Truth and Goldust doing a very long burn gimmick about getting together as a tag team, but then turn out to lose a lot.
JUN 19 | 8 PM ET / 5 PM PT
T-MOBILE ARENA
LAS VEGAS, NV
It's time for yet another WWE PPV. This time it's Money in the Bank, which much like the Royal Rumble is centered around a signature match, which in this case is the Money in the Bank Ladder match, which rewards a briefcase that allegedly contains contract for a WWE World Heavyweight Championship match at the time of the holder's choosing. Typically this means they wait until the dude is beat up and then cash in and pin him while he's hurt. If anyone you like wins the briefcase, they will lose their cash in and be humiliated.
Main Event: Roman Reigns v. Seth Rollins
This is Seth-kun's first televised match and first 1v1 match since he returned at Extreme Rules by running up after the match and hitting Roman with a Pedigree. Despite the fan support for Seth, he is still solidly a face and goes for cheap heat, insulting the crowd at any time he's allowed. His motivation here is that he was stripped of the title when he was injured and Roman never beat him, therefore he believes he is the lineal champion. Possible swerves: Dean Ambrose threatened to win the briefcase and cash in on this match, or the winner. He'd have to win first.
AJ Styles v. John Cena
John Cena returned on Memorial Day to thunderous uh, noise and AJ Styles interrupted him to shake his hand. They were interrupted by what WWE calls the Club, and John Cena gets to call "Bullet Club" because he's Cena and what's Vince gonna do about it. AJ turned solidly heel by turning on Cena when the Club came to ringside. This has had a pretty good build that's been pretty meta (AJ told Cena that guys like him who lose to guys like Cena get buried in the WWE). Possible swerves: at the contract signing, AJ had a choice of a contract that would be a singles match and a contract of unspecified match type that would have Anderson and Gallows at ringside. He chose the singles match, but don't be surprised if shenanigans occur anyways.
Money in the Bank Ladder Match: Sami Zayn v. Kevin Owens v. Alberto Del Rio v. Dean Ambrose v. Chris Jericho v. Antonio Cesaro
The Money in the Bank Ladder match has been around for a long time ever since being invented by Jericho, who finally won it in the 6th running of the event in Appleton. It used to be run at WrestleMania, but now it has its own event. Before the brand split ended they'd run two of them, but now they run just one, even though the brand split is coming back. These are usually entertaining affairs and most of the guys in this match are good workers so this should be a good match. Possible swerves: Bray Wyatt interfered in the match for literally no reason whatsoever last year and he's been off of TV for almost 2 months due to an ankle injury, despite the fact that he's reportedly healthy and cleared. The build to this of course involved lots of 6 man tag matches.
The Rest of the Card:
Tag Title Fatal Four-Way: WWE Tag Team Champions The New Day vs. Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson vs. Enzo Amore & Big Cass vs. The Vaudevillains (Fatal 4-Way Match)[/U]
The Teddy Long match (no, really). Not much to say about it other than its what it says on the tin. Almost every permutation of these teams have fought each other on SD and Raw already.
U.S. Champion Rusev vs. Titus O'Neil
This is the match where we see if Vince has the stones to make Celebrity Father of the Year Titus O'Neill get squashed by a guy whose gimmick is hating America on Father's Day.
WWE Women’s Champion Charlotte & Dana Brooke vs. Natalya & Becky Lynch
Charlotte dumped Ric Flair cruelly after the last PPV for being a bad father, and then everyone came to Ric's defense even though she cheated constantly with Ric's help. This is Dana's first PPV - she was promoted with her NXT gimmick of being Emma's lackey, but Emma underwent surgery for a back issue a week after Dana's promotion so she was put with Charlotte. It's a shaky team with a lot of friction, however. Becky and Natalya are playing completely straight baby-faces here who just think Charlotte is a jerk.
Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin
This is the fifth time they've faced off, and the third straight PPV, but the only PPV in which they actually made the main card.
Apollo Crews vs. Sheamus
Sheamus is upset because Shane keeps calling this the "new era" and he lost to Zayn in the MITB qualifier, so he went backstage and beat up Apollo Crews.
There's a preshow of 2 matches as well, which are obviously just throw-away matches, but they are at least normally called by Mauro Ranallo, who is an actual good play-by-play guy.
Preshow: The Lucha Dragons vs. The Dudley Boyz (Kickoff Match)
I believe this one is legitimately a random match out of thin air with no build.
Preshow: The Golden Truth vs. Breezango
Breezango is Tyler Breeze and Fandango doing a Zoolander-esque gimmick. Golden Truth is R-Truth and Goldust doing a very long burn gimmick about getting together as a tag team, but then turn out to lose a lot.
