IWATA: "Takahashi-san, tell us the 'Riki potato' story you told me at the water cooler the other day."
TAKAHASHI: "Water cooler? We work in separate buildings."
IWATA: "Shush, Takahashi-san." (laughs nervously)
TAKAHASHI: "Do you even have a water cooler here? Do you even drink water? Come to think of it, I've never seen you eat or drink, or use the facilities." 1
1 Takahashi is insinuating Iwata is an android. 2
2 Androids are synthetic constructs meant to resemble humans.
IWATA: (nervous laughter intensifies)
TAKAHASHI: "At any rate, during the development of the original Xenoblade Chronicles, for Wii, I found myself lusting over the character Riki."
IWATA: "Riki?! The Nopon?! How strangely erotic."
TAKAHASHI: "Wait, I don't mean it in a DeviantArt sort of way. 3 I mean I hungered for Riki. I wanted to eat him!"
3 DeviantArt is a collection of crudely-drawn Sonic fan art
IWATA: "Eat Riki?! What would he taste like?!"
TAKAHASHI: "His ovular shape makes me think he might taste like potatoes."
IWATA: "Aonuma-san and I were discussing this the other day. He thinks Riki would taste more like a mango."
TAKAHASHI: "I don't very much care for mangos. At any rate, the concept of Riki tasting like potatoes was intriguing to me. Unfortunately, as this revelation occurred to me as the first Xenoblade was about finished, we were unable to properly express this concept in the narrative of the game."
IWATA: "I see. Every game has a schedule, and sometimes the conclusion of a game's development means that certain concepts such as potato-tasting characters go unexpressed."
TAKAHASHI: "Exactly. I felt like an abandoned lover, reaching out helplessly from the platform as the train carrying my soulmate disappeared down the bend."
IWATA: "That feeling, the feeling of one's lover disappearing from sight as their train leaves the station, is a rough feeling indeed."
TAKAHASHI: "That's right. So I knew I would need to create another game to express the concept of Riki as a potato. That led to the character of Tatsu, and was the starting point of Xenoblade Chronicles X."
IWATA: "Incredible!" (laughs)
TAKAHASHI: "I hope players look forward to meeting this potato-like Nopon. I will shed tears of joy if I hear them saying how much they wanted to eat him."
You're gonna get me in trouble for giggling like an idiot at work.