Having an aesthetic racial preference

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GrizzNKev

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I'll describe this in the best way I can: the prettiest Asian female is, to me, prettier than the prettiest female of any other race or ethnicity. Edit to clarify: I've been jokingly accused of having "yellow fever" upon expressing my preferences with my close friends.

I've talked to people who find this trait of mine to be off-putting, but I think it's pretty common and I believe that everyone has a preference. That's not to say that other girls aren't attractive to me - of course they are - but I still have my favorites.

Is there anything socially wrong with this? Does anyone else share these feelings?

Edit: Yes, I am a white male, and yes, I have an Asian girlfriend who is aware of this.
 
I don't think having a racial preference for aesthetics is bad, as long as you're not only into someone because of their race or not into someone because of their race.
 
No, having a type is not wrong. You can't force yourself to be attracted to all races equally, and if you do you're being dishonest with yourself which is a mistake in this short life.
 
While there may be certain characteristics or features I find more attractive compared to others, they are not limited to any racial group or ethnicity.
 
It is certainly something I find odd. My sisters for example don't find black guys attractive, and it is odd to me. I might be bias though, because black women as a group tend to be looked at as the least attractive.
 
It's the sort of thing that like... it totally sucks but also I don't blame you?

The important thing is not to go around saying "I have yellow fever" out loud ever. You sound like a little bit uncomfortable about it, which is healthy I think.

Relevant: http://www.seekingasianfemale.com/the-film/ been meaning to watch this movie. This American Life ran a sort of excerpt/companion on their show this week.
 
There is nothing wrong with this OP. So long as this doesn't develop into prejudice (which is a huge stretch).

As someone said above, pretty much every person has something that makes them weak in the knees. If it happens to be complexion or bone structure specific to a certain race, nothing wrong with that.
 
Brakke said:
It's the sort of thing that like... it totally sucks but also I don't blame you?

The important thing is not to go around saying "I have yellow fever" out loud ever. You sound like a little bit uncomfortable about it, which is healthy I think.
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Yeah, this is another thing. I don't spout it to everyone I know. I do have a friend who does, and my gf thinks it's gross.
 
I think that's perfectly fine. Being of Iberian Jewish origin, I prefer the aesthetics to Spaniard/French/Mediterranean girls than other women. Nothing wrong with preferring your own kind, doesn't make you a bigot or anything.
 
Everybody has a type...they like blondes, tall people, fit people, whatever...your type just happens to be an aggregate of lots of other types.
 
I think it all depends on how much emphasis you place on this preference.

I prefer steak, but I won't turn down grilled chicken.
 
Having a racial preference is fine, the issue is fetishisizing certain races, which is different entirely. Additionally there are some people who won't date certain races, which is downright wrong and racist.
 
Nothing wrong with that.

There are people who find blonde hair more attractive. Or people who like more chubby woman.

My gf, like yours, is also aware of that and it was never a problem. I just told her that I like asian female (China, Taiwan, Korea, Japan) more attractive than white females.
The same applies to a lot of Asian though too.
 
I'm a white dude, but I tend to find very attractive women of other races more attractive than very attractive white women. If that makes any sense.
 
Nothing wrong with this. Do we have to feel bad about not liking pickles as much as onions too? Our preference in mates is another kind of taste. There's no accounting for it.

What is wrong is not desiring to be friends, co-workers, etc with someone because of their ethnicity.

And I do hope you'd remain open to all mates even if you know what you like.
 
GrizzNKev said:
I'll describe this in the best way I can: the prettiest Asian female is, to me, prettier than the prettiest female of any other race or ethnicity. I've got that typical yellow fever. Japanese, Korean, Chinese, whatever. I just find myself more attracted to them.

I've talked to people who find this trait of mine to be off-putting, but I think it's pretty common and I believe that everyone has a preference. That's not to say that other girls aren't attractive to me - of course they are - but I still have my favorites.

Is there anything socially wrong with this? Does anyone else share these feelings?

Edit: Yes, I am a white male, and yes, I have an Asian girlfriend who is aware of this.
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Not a problem, so long as you're not fetishizing an entire race.

The fact that you used the term "yellow fever" in your post leads me to believe you are fetishizing an entire race, if I'm being real. Because nobody actually says "I've got that typical yellow fever."

But do you, OP.
 
#teamwaifu checking in

I never really had it before (actually, I thought people with yellow fever were kind of weird) I met my ex-wife. But now, Asian girls get me going, especially if they're mixed...ffffuuuuu

royalan said:
Not a problem, so long as you're not fetishizing an entire race.

The fact that you used the term "yellow fever" in your post leads me to believe you are fetishizing an entire race, if I'm being real. Because nobody actually says "I've got that typical yellow fever."

But do you, OP.
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I use 'yellow fever' in conversation daily.
 
GamerJM said:
Having a racial preference is fine, the issue is fetishisizing certain races, which is different entirely. Additionally there are some people who won't date certain races, which is downright wrong and racist.
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Not necessarily. I can think of a handful of scenarios. Hell, I know of one going on right now. This guy I know made it a point to find a woman of the same race to have kids with because his sister didn't, and her mixed-race children were the subject of violence; he did it out of fear of racism.
 
joBPYdS.gif
 
royalan said:
Not a problem, so long as you're not fetishizing an entire race.

The fact that you used the term "yellow fever" in your post leads me to believe you are fetishizing an entire race, if I'm being real. Because nobody actually says "I've got that typical yellow fever."

But do you, OP.
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I wasn't being totally serious when I used that term. I don't find all Asian women attractive. Like I said, I just think the most attractive Asian woman is more attractive than the most attractive, say, white woman. I typically find myself most attracted to girls who are very ethnically different from myself.
 
I'm open to all races, but sheer probability dictates that I run into more Caucasian women than other races. However, after my last ex, I'm more appreciative of Asian women and will actively pursue them now.

I'm Asian for the record.
 
I feel like the popular meme is "you can have a preference, but just don't fetishize them!"

I've been in a million of these threads, had people try to explain it... I still don't know what it means.

I guess it's a little like stereotyping someone because of their ethnicity, but in a way you find positive?
 
BocoDragon said:
I feel like the popular meme is "you can have a preference, but just don't fetishize them!"

I've been in a million of these threads, had people try to explain it... I still don't know what it means.

I guess it's a little like stereotyping someone because of their ethnicity, but in a way you find positive?
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I'm only guessing here, but I imagine they mean preferences are all right, as long as you're not just viewing a person as Asian #14214. Like, if you see a cute girl across the room and you think to yourself, "I want to have sex with her, she's cute," versus, "Asian target acquired. Need2fuck."

Delta Assault said:
"Yellow fever causes 200,000 infections and 30,000 deaths every year, with nearly 90% of these occurring in Africa."

You sure about that?
Click to expand...

africa got dat thirst
 
Before we get started, let's point out that "I tend to like people of ethnicity X" is pretty different from "I ONLY like people of ethnicity X" or "I don't find people of ethnicity Y to be attractive."

Secondly, let's acknowledge the role that society/media/theworldaroundyou plays in helping to define what is and is not considered attractive.

other than that, I got nothin right now
 
Delta Assault said:
"Yellow fever causes 200,000 infections and 30,000 deaths every year, with nearly 90% of these occurring in Africa."

You sure about that?
Click to expand...

Most of us aren't in Africa. If someone said that here, I'd definitely think of a kpop fan with thirst.
 
Beauty is beauty regardless of race, gender or whatever. You never know what you may enjoy until you open yourself to the endless possibilities out there. But again to each their own.
 
BocoDragon said:
I feel like the popular meme is "you can have a preference, but just don't fetishize them!"

I've been in a million of these threads, had people try to explain it... I still don't know what it means.

I guess it's a little like stereotyping someone because of their ethnicity, but in a way you find positive?
Click to expand...

Basically, yes. It's reducing the person to their stereotypes and finding them attractive because of that. Similar to objectifying a person, in a way.
 
Eh, most people have a preference, even if they won't openly admit it. If I can be honest, I sort of dislike the "push" for interracial marriages/relationships to be the norm, as if it's something we should all strive to. I can and have dated outside my race, but I'm most likely going to marry within my own ethnic/religious group. Not only would it be better for me with regards to my immediate family, extended family, but it would be a way to maintain culture, tradition, values, language, food, etc.

I don't have any qualms with anyone else. Love is love, you can't help who you fall in love with, and no one has a right to tell you who you can and cannot love.

Edit: I do think interracial relationships are inevitable in a sense to increase. Whether it becomes the norm is in doubt, but the largest barriers had always been region, language, culture, lifestyle etc. But when everyone basically lives a western lifestyle, speaks English, enjoys the same types of things, it becomes much more possible for interracial relationships to thrive.
 
potam said:
I'm only guessing here, but I imagine they mean preferences are all right, as long as you're not just viewing a person as Asian #14214. Like, if you see a cute girl across the room and you think to yourself, "I want to have sex with her, she's cute," versus, "Asian target acquired. Need2fuck."
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I can understand your nuance, but I'm still not seeing how it's wrong.

If you know what you like, and you see someone who checks your boxes, it doesn't seem abhorrent to go after them because they are your type.

SRG01 said:
Basically, yes. It's reducing the person to their stereotypes and finding them attractive because of that. Similar to objectifying a person, in a way.
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See I wouldn't really care if someone knew they liked Asians and went after Asians because they were Asian.

If they thought "she's Asian so she must like Anime", now that's a sin!
 
GrizzNKev said:
I wasn't being totally serious when I used that term. I don't find all Asian women attractive. Like I said, I just think the most attractive Asian woman is more attractive than the most attractive, say, white woman.
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I figured you didn't mean it, but it's always a good thing to watch how you phrase things.

The thing that always gets me when this thread pops up is why is there such a rush to specify and discriminate? OP, you're dating an Asian girl now, and you find Asian features to be attractive. But can you honestly say that you've always found Asian girls to be the most attractive? Or that you'll only ever find Asian girls to be the most attractive? Are you taking into account the fact that Asian girls come with a wide range of features, body types and skin tones? Or are you just basing this off of your girlfriend and your image of "the perfect Asian girl" as based on what's largely presented to you in the media?

Theoretically, there's nothing wrong with having a "preference." It's just that usually, when dissected, those preferences tend to be nothing more than a reflection of willful narrow-mindedness, fetishism, and/or racism.
 
It's complicated, but I think the best thing that anyone can do is examine why they are/are not attracted to particular races, because the truth of the matter is that these feelings may stem from stereotypes which are really not applicable to entire races.

Like, it's so bizarre to me that anyone would make such wide-sweeping claims as "I'm not attracted to ____ people" or "_____ people are the most attractive" because people are just so different! Whenever people make claims like that, I just think they've been sheltered from experiencing the diversity of humanity, and it's sad.
 
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