GAF, did I get raped?
- Thread starter Zibrahim
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InsaneZero
Member
You said no. It's rape.
Sorry to hear about that OP. I don't have any good advice to give myself, but there are good people here that have provided excellent instructions and resources. Hope things get better for you.
Sorry to hear about that OP. I don't have any good advice to give myself, but there are good people here that have provided excellent instructions and resources. Hope things get better for you.
Without a lot more detail, it is impossible to determine. All the specific wording of your entire conversation as well as the exact sequence of events would need to be taken into consideration. I would suggest that GAF isn't the proper place to figure out if you are the victim of a crime.
Uh, no. Consent was explicitly denied. It is rape.
Extra Sauce
Member
Well at least it's not a picture book.
SliceSabre
Banned
You said no, she did it anyway. That's rape, even if she is a woman.
Call the cops.
Call the cops.
Huh? You can physically be aroused from rape/molestation. Doesn't mean you want it.
Yes OP, you were definitely raped. Unless you did consent (and can't remember). Although I feel that if you were that messed up and can't remember anything, the other person shouldn't have had sex with you in that state (especially if they are more sober).
I would argue, even if you didn't say NO, if you didn't consent, it's still rape. If that wasn't the case, then anyone could have sex with a passed out person, and it's not rape.
i can get aroused from using a gym bike. Trust me I don't think any part of it is sexy. I don't understand how this is a thing males don't know. But I am always surprised at the types of people that show up in these threads.
Rimon-hanit
Member
TBH, I'm actually shocked by the post i replied to. Is this..common? Do people really not know your body parts can get aroused by physical touch (even when it's not wanted)?
Insane.
Yep this. If he was too blacked out to consent, it's still rape (if she didn't get consent). Gender has absolutely no weight in this. Regardless of the gender, both parties have to consent.
Well I'm glad that you find a vague 10 sentence post by someone who was admittedly quite intoxicated as gospel to the events that happened, but I think more evidence is required.
Well yeah. We can only go off of what one person said. It's a forum, and thus limited to what the person said. But if what OP says is true, it was certainly rape. Unfortunately, none of us can actually say for sure, except OP (but he wanted advice from people). So people gave it.
If the situation he says happened, it was rape.
OP says he said no, she said it's okay and continued regardless. He then can't remember anything else because he was too blacked out. If he's too blacked out to consent, then he can't consent. Further, she apologized to him the next day (implying she was sorry for something). I mean, I don't know what else to say. If someone is too blacked out to consent, and someone has sex anyways, I don't know what else you would call that BUT rape....
Heavily intoxicated people who are passing out can't give consent.
What more evidence? He was unconscious though most of it. What part of that would be consensual?
Circle Jerk
Member
Yea I mean let's look at all the evidence to the contrary:
He was partially unconscious due to intoxication. You cannot give consent in that situation anyhow. That's rape, no matter how vague his post is.
Nevermind the fact that he denied consent before becoming partially unconscious.
Deified Data
Banned
Not a question you'd ever ask a woman I'd wager.
Come on. The claim being made isn't that the OP's post makes this an open-and-shut legal case. It's that, if events transpired as the OP describes, and there's nothing very important being left out, then what's been described is a rape. And the OP, if he knows that he's reported everything accurately, can confidently believe that what happened was a rape. Edit: And since it's not like the judgment of GAF matters in the real world, the OP has very little reason to be deceiving us, and so we can all also pretty confidently believe that a rape occurred.
Like, what do you have in mind that could be true but unreported or which the OP could be getting wrong which would render this not rape?
Boom Boom Pow
Banned
unlike women though, i do not believe they can do a rape-test kit on you can they?
Best is a doctor saying your p has been bruised
Best is a doctor saying your p has been bruised
... you 100% got raped, dude. If the role was reversed it would have been no different, and don't be surprised if the police, family and every person you possibly know comes crashing on you if the role was reversed too. I'm not saying this your cue to arrest her, but I just wanted to paint a picture of reality of what usually happens.
I hope you and the girl are still all good after this as I got a feel that you like her anyway. ... This is your choice but if I was in your shoes I would talk it over as you said she was apologetic in morning.
I hope you and the girl are still all good after this as I got a feel that you like her anyway. ... This is your choice but if I was in your shoes I would talk it over as you said she was apologetic in morning.
Circle Jerk
Member
CassidyIzABeast
Member
If that same scenario happened to a girl it would considered rape so yes, you were raped.
weremichael
Member
terrisus
Member
This post is all sorts of messed up.
This video should be mandatory viewing for anyone who thinks male rape is something to not take seriously.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikd0ZYQoDko
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ikd0ZYQoDko
What? Where did the OP say he was drugged?
terrisus
Member
Circle Jerk
Member
Please go into detail why he shouldn't press charges after being raped.
direct_quote
Member
Oh whoops I misread something in the post, never mind.
...what?
Explain.
I had a male friend that was raped, and his case wasn't taken seriously. Was pretty disgraceful. We also both came from a small down where everyone knows everyone, and he was treated with scorn. Sadly, it seems like some people can't accept that male's can also be raped.
That said, I have no idea what it's like in other cities/country's. Ultimately, this is a decision OP has to make for himself. But I would honestly say, rape is rape. Just because he's a male, doesn't make it any less. He was violated. I really can't find justification in this girl pushing through with Sex when he said no, and then continuing when he was passed out. Again, I don't see how gender factors into this at all. As a human being that can make conscious decision, that is just wrong to have sex with someone without consent. It's fuckin despicable.
I also am troubled by how other males feel that this sort of thing, should just be shrugged off. Clearly he wanted it (or he wouldn't have gotten an erection). Or it was just a simple misunderstanding. Why the fuck would that be the case just because he's a male?
Photolysis
Banned
You were raped. Reverse the genders and see. I'm sorry this happened to you. Unfortunately a lot of people (and likely law enforcement) will not take you seriously.
I would encourage you to get in touch with the police because women should not be able to get away with this stuff, but it's your decision.
And it's moronic shit like this that is one reason why "men can't get raped" is a too common attitude. It's as idiotic and ignorant as saying if a woman gets wet or orgasms then it's not rape. You should be utterly ashamed at your appalling ignorance. How the hell can you even comment on this topic when you are that uninformed?
Because anyone who knows anything about male physiology knows that you can't control erections. Having one is NOT consent.
I would encourage you to get in touch with the police because women should not be able to get away with this stuff, but it's your decision.
And it's moronic shit like this that is one reason why "men can't get raped" is a too common attitude. It's as idiotic and ignorant as saying if a woman gets wet or orgasms then it's not rape. You should be utterly ashamed at your appalling ignorance. How the hell can you even comment on this topic when you are that uninformed?
Because anyone who knows anything about male physiology knows that you can't control erections. Having one is NOT consent.
Mauricio_Magus
Banned
terrisus
Member
It's not "evertime somebody fucking posts something," it's "anytime somebody posts something stupid/hurtful/sexist/victim blaming/etc."
weremichael
Member
Kind of self drugged with the alcohol.
Circle Jerk
Member
Yea getting people to explain their horrific opinions sure is worse than the horrific opinions being expressed by some people in this thread. Thank god you found the proper thing to be angry about.
*hug to the OP* Definitely reach out to one of the counseling services mentioned by the mods. Unfortunately there's no good way to spot this type of crappy person until it's too late. Don't blame yourself, whatever you choose to do. If you do file a report (but not charges), it might be able to help the next guy and authorities if it happens again with this person. Not every jurisdiction allows that, though, and its something a counselor would likely be able to help you with.
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