So I just went on my girlfriends ipad....

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OCD Guy said:
Charming text I have just received from her friend.

So no prizes for guessing where she is.
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Should reply, respectfully: U wot u fookin tit! I'll spark you and ya mam

Seriously, sh'se playing the victim for emotionally cheating on you. Leave mate. She's going to cry those crocodile tears to everyone and make you seem like a controlling, obsessive partner.
 
OCD Guy said:
Charming text I have just received from her friend.

So no prizes for guessing where she is.
Click to expand...

Anyone who writes like that is no great loss assuming her friend is reflective of her. Did she vote Leave or Remain?

If it's Leave, take no prisoners.
 
StalkerUKCG said:
So here is the run down for people
  • OP Has a 55" OLED TV and High End Gaming PC.
  • OP Co-rents a property with his cock hungry GF
  • OP casually uses the iPad and once he unlocks it he sees a conversation in which the GF has been getting dick picks from another guy and suggesting she wants to bounce on it.
  • OP Diligently saves the conversation and emails himself.
  • GAF spends an entire work day and 28 pages giving mostly great advice on how to deal with the situation
  • OP Comes up with a plan to start removing his expensive items from the property during the day tomorrow before GF returns home at which point he will confront her using GAF's sages advice
  • GF comes home and quickly grabs the iPad so she cant slyly see some more strange salami.
  • OP Is overcome with rage and quips the timeless words "fancy seeing some more dick?"
  • GF freaks the fuck out and retorts "OH MY GOD, WHAT IS YOUR FUCKIN PROBLEM"
  • GF runs to bathroom to contemplate how badly she fucked up (and/or) get some more of that big ass motobike dick
  • OP talks to a door for a bit
  • GF comes out of bathroom and pushes OP out the way and leaves
  • OP is now alone
  • GF is out in the wild, maybe getting taken to O town by Big Dig Mcgee.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the rundown, even though it sounds like a skit from the Chappelle a Show: when keeping it real goes wrong.
 
StalkerUKCG said:
So here is the run down for people
  • OP Has a 55" OLED TV and High End Gaming PC.
  • OP Co-rents a property with his cock hungry GF
  • OP casually uses the iPad and once he unlocks it he sees a conversation in which the GF has been getting dick picks from another guy and suggesting she wants to bounce on it.
  • OP Diligently saves the conversation and emails himself.
  • GAF spends an entire work day and 28 pages giving mostly great advice on how to deal with the situation
  • OP Comes up with a plan to start removing his expensive items from the property during the day tomorrow before GF returns home at which point he will confront her using GAF's sages advice
  • GF comes home and quickly grabs the iPad so she cant slyly see some more strange salami.
  • OP Is overcome with rage and quips the timeless words "fancy seeing some more dick?"
  • GF freaks the fuck out and retorts "OH MY GOD, WHAT IS YOUR FUCKIN PROBLEM"
  • GF runs to bathroom to contemplate how badly she fucked up (and/or) get some more of that big ass motobike dick
  • OP talks to a door for a bit
  • GF comes out of bathroom and pushes OP out the way and leaves
  • OP is now alone
  • GF is out in the wild, maybe getting taken to O town by Big Dig Mcgee.
Click to expand...

Yup, perfect summary.
Plus this doesn't deserve to be at the end of the page so quoting for future references.
 
OCD Guy said:
This is her mate that lives locally (not whatsapp bike dick)

She's really loud and mouthy (not sure if you use that description in America). I'm not even going to reply to it.
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Don't bother. You'll always be in the wrong. Expect more texts like that. You need to be ready for when she makes this 100% public, trying to get everyone's sympathies with her. You guys public on Facebook? If so, be checking that. Make sure you're ready to talk with mutual friends.
 
No point in responding to her friend, this is all very predictable. She'll play the victim until reality hits her.
 
You need to move, now. Don't wait all night. Just up and go somewhere idk where. But stay safe. It's gonna get nasty pretty soon. It's already happened. You need to be on your feet now. Pack what you can, and get out. Don't wait till the morrow, just go.
 
OCD Guy said:
For me though it's more than just a dick.

She has been having sexual conversations with someone behind my back.

It's not a small deal to her either, if it was she'd have opened up to me, instead of a fake look of surprise and hesitation in her voice when I confronted her.

I appreciate I went straight it but honestly I was sitting there looking at her out the corner of the eye as she smiled while staring at her ipad and I snapped.

For me the trust is broken, whether she's had sex or not is not relevant, I don't think it's right to have the sort of conversation that she had when you're in a relationship.
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I don't blame you dude. It's not even about just the pic, its a question of how far was she willing to go?

At least with a drunken one night stand people can try to get away with the "it just happened" excuse. This sounds like it had been going on a while, and escalating up to naked pictures.

The fact that her response has been so childish and it sounds like she wants to play victim is inexcusable.

All these people saying "shit happens, try an open relationship". This isn't like you've been married 30 years, where kids and daily life has sucked all the excitement out of your relationship and one pwrson wants to feel young again.

You've only been with her four years,and she's already struggling with temptation and going behind your back to do it.

You have every right to question whether or not you want to have a future with this woman.

Good luck.
 
OCD Guy said:
This is her mate that lives locally (not whatsapp bike dick)

She's really loud and mouthy (not sure if you use that description in America). I'm not even going to reply to it.
Click to expand...

Yep, don't let them get to you. They're trying to be manipulative and get anything out of you that they can then use to blame you for this.
 
clearly the best move here is to just take your stuff and move the fuck out overnight (somehow), post the keys through the letter box, block all contact and move on.

In real life, no one ever does that. But they should.
 
zaldrizes said:
Was it really written like that? Are they airheads or what?
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They're Essex girls, so you can probably imagine the accent.

I don't talk like that, I've got more of a London accent (not posh).

When they talk they're like "You alright babe *mwah*" (say that in the Essex accent and you can imagine how annoying it is)
 
OCD Guy said:
Charming text I have just received from her friend.

So no prizes for guessing where she is.
Click to expand...

can we get a translator?

template.png
 
mkenyon said:
17 years and counting. My baby is due in December too! Pretty hyped.

I'm not, but I'm pretty confident that I do know more than a lot of the people posting reactionary "bail out" type posts. Knowing "more", instead of "it all" is perhaps pedantic.

But still, this type of shit shouldn't be over until a rational and reasonable conversation can be had. If it can't at all, then yeah, relationship should probably end due to communication issues.

Just gonna say this one more time: Cheating is not okay, but people can, do, and will make mistakes. At the end of the day, it's sex, and not the end of the world.
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It's not about the end of the world. That's the thing. Its purely personal until you have a kid and then it's something different. Then I understand you're perspective and i'm pretty sure everyone here understands that thought process. -to a degree-


But you don't need to shove it down are throats, this is not a SO or family situation. This about a GF and a relationship that his seen its last straw, and in that scenario -here- the OP is justified to be livid or untrusting and especially those that have gone through it before. Butagain to you're point; yeah maybe they can or could talk it out, but it's a two way street and i'm not to going to belittle him if he doesn't. An Take the aforementioned "adult route " the other chair has to be pulled out on the big boy table first.
 
mkenyon said:
Just gonna say this one more time: Cheating is not okay, but people can, do, and will make mistakes. At the end of the day, it's sex, and not the end of the world.
Click to expand...
Sure, it's possible to see it only as sex, and in that case I agree. I once had a strictly sexual relationship with a girl I didn't care about sentimentally, at all. We were very sincere from the beginning in that we were free to do as we pleased as far as sex went. It was never cheating, of course, because we had been honest about the rules day one and we respected those rules.

That said, in the case of OP, honesty, sincerity and respect have gone out the window. She cheated on the rules they had set as a couple.

Even if that wasn't the case, even if OP was ready to talk and forgive and figure out a way to make it work, she just left the flat without saying anything, went to a friend's place and is now involving a third party into the issue, making OP look like a guy that doesn't respect his GF's privacy. Surely you can see how that's messed up?
 
OCD Guy said:
For me though it's more than just a dick.

She has been having sexual conversations with someone behind my back.

It's not a small deal to her either, if it was she'd have opened up to me, instead of a fake look of surprise and hesitation in her voice when I confronted her.

I appreciate I went straight it but honestly I was sitting there looking at her out the corner of the eye as she smiled while staring at her ipad and I snapped.

For me the trust is broken, whether she's had sex or not is not relevant, I don't think it's right to have the sort of conversation that she had when you're in a relationship.
Click to expand...

Yeah bail out. If she thinks this is funny, that's pretty clear she doesn't even respect you.
 
OCD Guy said:
They're Essex girls, so you can probably imagine the accent.

I don't talk like that, I've got more of a London accent (not posh).

When they talk they're like "You alright babe *mwah*" (say that in the Essex accent and you can imagine how annoying it is)
Click to expand...
Oh my God, Gaf has it's own episode of TOWIE. Holy shit.
 
Clockwork5 said:
Heh. It's been years and honestly I spent a long time trying to forget so some of the details are a bit fuzzy. But this thread has me feeling sympathetic so here we go.

Upon waking up one day I went to check my email only to find my GFs gmail account open. She was still asleep and had been up super late so the inbox was still open. The first thing I saw was "I miss you too" from some dude she grew up with. That would never have rang alarm bells and I would have closed the tab; however, I recognized the name as a dude who she described as an asshole who always made her feel like shit for not dating him. "That's strange" I said to myself as I clicked the email. That email was a reply to her email which said something like...

"I miss you and I wish I was sleeping next to you tonight."

Sudden nausea and sadness consumed me. I woke her up, she cried and explained that she missed home and nothing would ever happen because he is so far away. A lengthy conversation ensued about my future suspicions every time she visited home, asking her why she lied about the nature of her relationship with him and why she always characterized him as an asshole. She reassured me that she loved me and she will make sure I know this won't happen again.

Things took time to get better but a few months later they were good again. My trust in her was damaged, but it was healing. Then one night she said a friend of hers knew a guy who was moving here and he wanted to go out. Her friend was working that night so asked my GF to take him out for a drink or two. My GF said to call her when I got off work and I could join them. I call she doesn't answer. I go to bed.

I look at my phone in the morning. No missed calls. I call again, no answer. She finally calls back around 7pm and tells me what a good time they had and they drank and danced until the bars closed. I'm thinking, that's a little fucked up but just said "I would have liked to join you, why didn't you call?"

"Idk we were just having a really good time."

She broke up with me that night. After 4 years.

I was really good to her, showed her affection, helped her through school, helped her through some really hard financial and family issues.

I was shocked, depressed and handled the breakup super poorly. That was on me, though.

Sorry for the novel.
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And this is why you never let her explain herself, she manipulated this guy, making him believe it was an isolated thing and when the opportunity came she didn't even blink and ended the relationship right there. Hopefully OP did the right thing and ends his, the people who says talk about it maybe you can continue obviously never experienced anything similar, just like the guy who's been married for 26 years.
 
Bail OP, you're not gonna get any decent closure out of this now. She Playing the victim and that comes with fair share of lies. Like many said, congrats on your handling of the situation. I wish you luck and don't look back.
 
OCD Guy said:
They're Essex girls, so you can probably imagine the accent.

I don't talk like that, I've got more of a London accent (not posh).

When they talk they're like "You alright babe *mwah*" (say that in the Essex accent and you can imagine how annoying it is)
Click to expand...
You need to get out with the most expesnive stuff you can safely transport
 
Xamtheking said:
You need to get out with the most expesnive stuff you can safely transport
Click to expand...


Jazzy Geoff said:
clearly the best move here is to just take your stuff and move the fuck out overnight (somehow), post the keys through the letter box, block all contact and move on.

In real life, no one ever does that. But they should.
Click to expand...

I'd love to but it's actually impossible.

It's currently 11:30pm here, and I've got nowhere to go, and no way of transporting my stuff. I drive a tiny 2 seater, so couldn't even fit my clothes in there, let alone furniture, pc, consoles etc
 
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